//------------------------------// // The Delta // Story: My Name is Ash // by Lady Umbra //------------------------------// For a moment, Shining gaped at me in horror. I’m pretty sure he screamed, but not before vanishing in a flash of pink light. Even then, I still heard his scream across the Everfree Forest before he reappeared, his eyes wide with panic. "The book's gone!” he got out through his scream. "And the daggers?" I asked. "Gone too!” he shrieked. I almost joined him in screaming - or at the very least cursing - before a massive piece of Evil Dead Lore returned to me. "How many bodies were there?” I asked. “By my estimate, there should be nine corpses; two normal and seven deadites.” Shining Armor’s eyes somehow grew even wider. “Oh, Faust,” he swore. “There were only eight bodies.” He paused. “Wait… you’re not saying these demons can possess the dead as well, can they?” “It’s bullshit,” I admitted. “But it’s true.” Shining Armor buried his head in his hands, while I turned away with a growl. But as I turned away, I realized Zecora was undoing Twilight’s shirt. Now I may be asshole, but I’d like to consider myself a gentlemen when it comes to some things. Like a woman’s modesty. Immediately, I left the room, dragging Shining with me. Though the second he saw what Zecora was doing, he followed me out without resistance. “So,” Shining asked as soon as we were outside. “How do we get the book back?” "I don't know" I say putting my left hand to my chin. "Maybe we could…” But as I spoke, I looked up… and I saw someone familiar watching us from the shadows. Shining followed my gaze. He started to draw his sword. “That’s not a deadite, is it?” “No,” I growled, reattaching my chainsaw. “Stay inside,” I told Armor. “Keep your sister safe.” Shining almost moved to protest, but something in my voice must have dissuaded him. He raced back inside, while I marched up to the same merchant who sold me the book and chainsaw. "Long time no see Ashley,” the merchant said, his eyes flashing and crinkling as he probably grinned smugly at me under his mask. The first thing I did was draw my gun on him. He easily dodged my shot and knocked me on my ass. “Now-now,” he mocked. “Is that anyway to greet an old friend?” “Why’d you do it?” I snarled. “Why’d you send me here?” "This world needed your help,” he replied like it was obvious. “You’ve already seen it. The changelings are demons in this world. And they will throw this world into chaos if they find a way to retrieve that book." “But they couldn't read from the book I bought,” I noted. “Why?" The merchant’s eyes flashed with that smug smile again. "Because The one I gave you is written in Earth Sumerian. The book that Starwirl banished was written in Equestrian Sumerian,” he explained. “A small difference, there is. But just enough. Just enough.” "And what's stopping them from creating another book?" "They still need the flesh of the impure for the cover. As well as her blood to ink the passages.” "Her?" I asked. "The Alicorn within the Zebra's home,” he replied. “Twilight Sparkle, wasn’t it?” I growled at his response, but I could already tell attacking him would do no good. He laughed at my anger. “You can’t deny it,” he said. “The princess has read from the book of the dead. Her blood is tainted. She is the prime candidate to become the book.” “So,” I growled. “Did you come all this way just to lecture me? “I came to warn you,” he replied. “That if the demons of this world manage to get their hands on her, than you, along with this world, will die. I can't stop what happens in this world. All I can do is move between the worlds and send humans like you to the worlds that need them. And right now, this world needs you to kill the changelings before they plague this world.” "And what's stopping me from taking Twilight away from all of this crap, and living in hiding?" I shot back. Surprisingly, he shrugged. "Nothing,” he admitted. “I have little power here, and even less over you now. However I can do a few things for you.” "Like what?" In response, he placed his hand on my slave collar. The collar glowed and sparked, before snapping open and hitting the ground. "What?!" I stammered, clutching at my neck. "The real Ash Williams is a slave to no-one,” he reminded me. I rubbed at my neck. It felt like a massive weight had been lifted off my body. “And if that’s not enough,” he added. “I left you a little something by the train station.” “What exactly?” I asked. He chuckled ominously. “Now that would be spoiling the surprise,” he replied. Then he walked away, and was lost to the shadows. I scoffed. “Asshat,” I muttered, before returning to inside the tree hut. Shining Armor was waiting right outside the door. I would’ve bet my chainsaw he was watching us. “Who was that?” Shining Armor demanded. He looked down at my neck. “How’d he… do that?” "That was the man who sent me to this world,” I answered. “And he is also the one who has freed me from Celestia's spell, which probably means I can’t be angry with him.“ I really couldn’t. I couldn’t believe how much of a relief it was to have that cursed collar off me. Yet, as I kept rubbing my neck, Shining suddenly tensed up. "You're not…” he asked nervously. “Gonna… do the thing you said you were gonna do to the Princess… are you?" I laughed, unhooking my chainsaw. “I thought I told you that was just me dealing with my anger,” I replied. “Nah, I think I’ll just punch the shit out of her. Maybe it’ll knock some sense into that head of hers.” Shining Armor exhaled. “Well, if that’s all…” he muttered, before taking off a black ring and handing it to me. I glanced at the ring with a half grin. “You proposing or something?” I joked. Shining rolled his eyes. “Sorry,” he replied. “But the girl I proposed to was prettier.” He and I shared a laugh before he dropped the black ring into my hand. “That’s a magic repelling ring,” he explained. “I brought it in case the deadites could use unicorn magic. If Celestia tries to keep you from murdering them again, that should protect you.” "Thanks, man.” I slipped the ring onto my middle finger before flashing the bird at him. “How’s it look?” I asked innocently. "Funny,” Shining replied with a roll of his eyes. I chuckled. These two siblings weren’t bad company; I had to give them that. Our moment of levity passed, however, as Zecora’s gasp drew us back to the bed. “How is she?” Shining asked. “Not good, not good,” Zecora murmured gravely. “Nothing I have can fix this mood.” "Calm down Zecora,” I ordered. “Breathe. And tell us what's wrong with Twilight.” Zecora indicated the mare before us. “Take a look,” she declared. “For she is becoming the book.” Reluctantly, I looked down. Her shirt had been removed, and the only thing protecting her modesty was a white bra, holding d-cup breasts. So much for being a complete gentlemen. But my sight was soon drawn to the black and red markings covering her stomach. Markings in the ancient Sumerian text. "Heed the advice I give, if you want her to live,” Zecora declared. “Now that you have taken a look, you must not tell anypony she is the book!” You know about the book?” Shining Armor asked. "Ancient text from home that I gave up on,” she explained. "Fortold the coming of the living Necronomincon. Tell not a soul, lest her fate turns most foul!” As she spoke, she mixed herbs and berries, pouring them into her cauldron and mixing up a brew. After an hour of waiting, Zecora dipped a bowl into the brew and made her way to Twilight. Tilting the alicorn’s head up, she poured the liquid into her mouth. “This brew will make her wake,” she explained. “But you must help her, for her sake.” "Thank you, Zecora,” I said, picking Twilight up. I rested her head on my right shoulder while Shining grabbed my chainsaw. I know we don’t know each other that well, Twilight, I couldn’t help but think. But you were easily the best company I had here. And I’ll be damned if I let the deadites have you. With Twilight hopefully about to wake up soon, Shining Armor and I left the forest and made our way to the train station. Unfortunately, we were cut off by the ponies of Ponyville, wielding pitchforks and garden hoes. All they needed were torches, and the angry mob vibe would be complete. Though they did have Rainbow Dash at the head of the mob, and she had plenty of fire in her eyes. "Let Twi go, murderer!" Rainbow Dash growled, racing at me. I managed to move out of the way, but Shining wasn’t as lucky. Rainbow Dash seized his sword from him and aimed it at me. “Rainbow Dash!” Shining Armor barked, but she aimed his sword at him. “Don’t start, Shining,” she growled. “I saw you and this… monster slaughtering ponies left and…" BOOM! Before she could continue with this nonsense, I drew my shotgun and blasted Shining’s sword into shards. While Shining was used to the noise, every pony else flinched and cowered from the noise. I grinned as Rainbow Dash stared down at the broken blade, fear finally entering her eyes. I blew the smoke from the barrels. “Alright, you primitive screw heads,” I declared. “Listen up. You see this?” I hefted my shotgun into the air. “This… is my BOOMSTICK!” The ponies, including Rainbow Dash, jumped and flinched away. "It's a 12 gauge, double-barreled Remington! S-Mart's top-of-the-line! You can find this in the sporting goods department." I grinned at the weapon. "Yeah, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about $109.95. It’s got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel and a hair trigger." I aimed the gun around. "Shop Smart, Shop S-mart. YA GOT THAT?!" The ponies nodded vigorously. Not a single person dared to speak, allowing me to pick up the sound of dripping water and a low growl. But I only smiled at the challenge. "Now the next one of you ponies...even touches me…?” I took aim, and the crowd scattered with fear, revealing a single deadite crawling from a well. I blasted it’s left hand first, causing the possessed pony to reel back into the well. Reloading, I blasted off its right hand, sending it plummeting back into the hole in the ground. With a spin, I sheathed my boomstick, and glared at the ponies, who wisely backed up from me. Shining Armor walked up next to me, grimacing at the state his sword was in. “I’m gonna need to get another one from Canterlot,” He murmured. “C’mon,” I replied, easily making my way through the pacified mob… only to find another mob at the train station. But this mob wasn’t waiting for me. They were gathered around what the Merchant had left me. I laughed at the sight. “That guy’s an Asshat,” I declared. “But man, has he got style.” A car sat before the train station. Sleek as a seal and with headlights glowing. "What in Celestia's name is that?" Shining Armor gasped. “Some kind of chariot?” “That is no chariot, my friend,” I declared, moving giddily to the driver’s side door. “This is a work of art simply called… The Delta!” The ponies around us backed up, murmuring questions and stammers of disbelief, but I had no time for them. Opening the passenger side door, I set Twilight in the seat and fastened her seat belt. Turning to her brother, I jabbed a thumb at the backseat. He quickly jumped into the backseat. I hopped into the driver’s side, my giddy smile going from ear to ear like the Joker. I may have been stuck in a new world with ponies that either hated me or were scared of me, but I was inside my Dream Car. And the keys were in the ignition. I gave them a twist, sparking the engine to life. The roar made me shiver in glee, though it nearly sent Shining through the roof in fear. "What in Faust’s name…?!” he stammered. "Quit being a pussy," I said, shifting the car into drive. “It’s just the engine.” As I shifted, I noticed that instead of just PRND, there was a fifth gear shift that said AoD. Part of me really wanted to know what that gear did, but we needed to head back to the castle first. Let Shining re-arm, let everyone know Twilight was okay, and maybe let me get that punch in on Celestia. With Shining’s help, we were soon cruising through Equestria. We could’ve made it to Canterlot without any trouble, but the thing about taking a hour long train ride then fighting seven undead demons? It works up a appetite. “So, where can we get some grub around here?” I asked Shining. It took some time to find a place that sold both herbivore and carnivore species. But after a bit of searching, Shining and I found a small little fast food joint in the New York styled city of Manehatten. Once we stopped there, Shining had to go in since they probably wouldn't serve me. I stood outside of the Delta, leaned against the side, and dissuading any passerbys with a glare. Eventually, Shining returned with a menu. Instantly, I saw the item I wanted: Phily cheese steak sub. Of course, it was spelled ‘Filly Cheese Steak,’ but I wasn’t about to be nitpicky. Shining walked back in and came out with three bags. Inside one was my sub. As I gorged myself, Shining reached in his and pulled out a half wrapped burger but instead of meat it had what looked like either hay or straw. "And I'm assuming the third bag is for the princess?" I asked as we got back in. "She likes hay burgers,” He explained. “So I figured I'd get her one for when she wakes up.” We ate our food in silence for a bit, though I couldn’t help but smile as I thought of a question. “So,” I asked. “What do you think of the Delta?” Shining gave the seat a nervous if slightly impressed look. "It's a odd mode of transportation,” he admitted. “Stealth isn't possible with a chariot such as this, but it is far faster than one pulled by 10 of my fastest guards. Heck, I'd say this could go faster than Rainbow Dash herself.” I laughed, patting the Delta’s hood. “She’s quite the beauty, isn’t she?” “She?” Shining asked. “You… don’t mean the ch-The Delta, do you?” “All cars from my world are ‘she’s,” I replied. “At least to the car fanatics like me." Shining blinked like he didn’t understand, but just shrugged like he wasn’t about to demand explanation. “Well, the… mm, car, is quite beautiful,” he admitted. “But like I said, we’re not sneaking up on anything anytime soon.” “It's not supposed to be stealthy." I said, finishing my lunch. "Cars are good for doing three things:” I lifted my fingers on each point, “Going fast, looking absolutely badass, and getting chicks.” Shining blinked, casting a nervous look to his sister. “Is that… really how things in your world work?” I slumped. "Well no,” I admitted. “The main thing we use em for is to get from one place to another.” I grinned. “But that doesn't mean those things I said aren't true; some women from my world just love a hot guy with a badass car." My grin faded as a particular memory came to mind. "But those people only care about the car and the driver’s money.” Shining finished his burger. “Really?” he asked. “You speak from experience?” "Come on,” I said, grabbing Twilight’s hay burger and plopping it at her feet. “We still gotta get Twilight back to the capital. Get in.” Blinking at my sudden change in subject – and probably the venom in my voice – Shining got in as I started the car. He didn’t even get to shut the door before I peeled out, the prince yelping as the door slammed shut from the whiplash. "I take it, you spoke from experience!" Shining said over the engine. Without hesitation, I slammed on the brakes. My arm kept Twilight from launching forward, while Shining was nearly thrown through the window. “Another word,” I growled at him. “And I’ll kick you to the curb and take Twilight back by myself!” Shining scrambled back into the backseat, and for a moment, neither of us spoke. When Shining finally broke the silence, it was with a sincerely regretful tone of voice. “I’m sorry, Ash,” he said. “I didn’t mean to upset you.” I glared at him through the rearview mirror for a moment, before my anger faded. I sighed. "You're fine,” I admitted. “I just...don't like talking about people who stab me in the heart." I started to press on the gas again when we both heard a groan. The two of us whirled to Twilight, twin grins lighting up our faces as Twilight’s eyes fluttered open. However, as she looked around, panic began to set on her features. “Twilight?” I asked as she started to struggle against her seatbelt. “Twilight!” She whirled on me, her eyes like a cornered animal. “Twilight, it’s okay,” I said, undoing her seatbelt. “You’re safe.” Recognizing my features, Twilight’s expression softened. Tears started to form in her eyes. "Ash!" Twilight sobbed, lunging to me and wrapping her arms around my neck. “You saved me.” Shining gaped at her. “And what am I? Lamb chops?” he asked. “I fought to save you too!” “Oh! Shiny” Twilight stammered, reaching over to give him a hug as well. Yet, as she did so, her eyes darted around in confusion. “Um… where are we?” "This is a mode of transportation from my world," I said. “It’s called The Delta.” “Delta?” Twilight ran her hands over the dash. She looked ready to launch into another thousand question session, before her stomach let out a growl like a lion. Her face turned beet red. "Sounds like someone's hungry,” I noted with a laugh. “Luckily,” Shining declared. “Your BBBBFF got you a hay burger.” He pointed to the sealed bag, which had unfortunately hit the ground when I braked. But when Twilight pulled out the hay burger, it looked completely fine. And probably tasted fine from the way she started eating. While she ate, smearing her lips with the sauce, I couldn't help but smile. Yet, when I noticed Shining struggling not to glare at me, I felt my cheeks burn up. Shaking my head, I pressed on the gas, and we drove out of Manehatten. We made it about halfway to Canterlot before Twilight finished her burger. Wiping her mouth with a napkin from the bag, she turned to the two of us. “Thank you for saving me,” she said. “Both of you,” she added quickly, turning to her brother and kissing him… then giving me a kiss as well. I tried not to look at Shining’s attempt not to grimace, while Twilight grabbed the seat belt and reattached it before turning to the radio. “Oh, what’s this do?” she asked, hitting the radio, and causing music to start playing. I couldn't help but smile. "Heh...Groovy," I said, picking up speed and racing for the castle.