My Time in Equestria

by ShadowRazer2121


Chapter 3: Tom Fuckery Acquired

My time being STONED, ha see what I did there i am funny laugh at me, haha haha. I on my normal strolls until I discovered my chaotic magical shenanigans by you’ll never guess it. Snapping. K let me tell the story because why not. It all started....

I was walking through Ponyville, and yes I bought a house fight me bitch. I walked through the town heading to a local café for some hot coco in the middle of summer. Yes I know I did this stuff while I was Human fight me yet again. I decided to do something different that day as my usual waiter came to my table. Her name however did not fit her, I really hate saying this......her....her...cute...cutie...cutie you know what fuck it. Her ass mark HAPPY WITH ME. God So ungrateful. But I did not say that to them of course, I had standards. Her name was Lunar Eclipse named after her great great great grandmother when she had server in the Lunar guard during the nightmare moon thingy happening stuff with all that B S. Anyway her butt mark was that of a comet with the with a Solar eclipse in the middle. Which confused me so I just don’t look at pony asses anymore. And no I did not do it before then, Perverts. I just the marks hurt my head. A lot.

“Greetings Lazy, what can I get you.” As she had her usual smile on her face. God if I had to marry o made in this hell hole she might be it. But i don’t think Umbreon and ponies are comparable....I am going to burn those stacks of paper before they spread.

I put my paw to my chin in thought as I looked at the menu. I then snapped my fingers and said my answer.

“I will take a coco surprise with cream and a marshmallow top.” I said. I was simple yet effective.
I gave her my menu and she walked off, but when I looked down I saw a cup of what I ordered already in front of me. When she came back she noticed the cup as well as I looked at her in confusion.

“Um...did you put this here?” I asked as I looked at her with a questioning glance. I then thought of something. I snapped my fingers for the cup to go away and it did. I let out a worried breaths.

“I can make things appear?” I said to myself as I began to sweat nervously. I had magic yes, now keep in mind I had no clue so don’t go oh these reactions are bullshit. I had no clue. Also I had not know for like a month cause I never really wanted anything and decided to snap. So yeah case closed I guess.

And that’s how Tom fuckery entered my life