The plan was simple. I took the train out of Ponyville and towards Las Pegasus in the West. I’d find out just who had a...mane that was a shade of faded light vermillion. Perhaps it was a bit callous of me to leave so readily on the mare’s account. But someone had to verify that her claims were true. And as I said, I didn’t intend to leave anymore loose ends open. I knew both Corkscrew and Flash Drive were more than capable of keeping that area secured. Both Neon and Guttersnipe were also nearby if they needed help with anything.
So I knew everything would be smooth if I kept a cool head and moved carefully. Hm.
I slipped the pencil back into the metal loops of my notepad. Writing with your mouth was a first-world problem, but it’s a good thing Cheerilee recommended me the flavored eraserhead brand that I currently made use of. It was an invention created by Pinkie Pie when she realized that Unicorns could make use of magic and Pegasi could manipulate objects with their wings like fingers that were similar to griffon claws. Earth Ponies had it the hardest when it came to tool manipulation, so we made use of things like magnetic horseshoes, our tails, and mouths.
Though, if your tail was short and scruffy like mine, then it’d be much harder. Long tails were less common among stallions than mares, so tail-based manipulation was...not very easy for someone like me. I suppose that’s when Pinkie decided to create the flavored eraserheads on pencils. Writing with such a thing in your mouth was disgusting, not to mention could potentially pass on germs if you weren’t careful. But at least this made it more bearable.
Why was I thinking about this? Oh right. Because the suspect that I was looking for was an Earth Pony himself. According to Cork’s notes, the feathers that were used were indeed Pegasus feathers. But they matched nopony in the citizenship records. How was this possible? Well, I had a few theories. First off, the shape and style of the feathers was altered in some way. Secondly, because of the way Earth Ponies interacted with living beings, it’s entirely possible that these feathers were plucked in such a way they left them unidentifiable.
It was like forging one’s signature. Imagine an autograph that doesn’t exist, and being able to fool enough people into thinking that you were someone who had always been in the system of life. Yeesh, what a scary thought. In this particular scenario, I wondered if this earth individual had a talent for craft and deformation of body parts. Not an unusual talent, per se. Chiropractors, physical therapists, biochemists, and even personal trainers all needed to have an extensive knowledge of the pony--or any other creature’s--body. And surprise, a majority of the professional ones were earth ponies according to the records. But just who was this particular one? Was this a case of malpractice or something much deeper?
“Hm…” I looked at the strand of hair in the evidence bag once more. Soon, the train would arrive at the station. Non-unicorns would receive the cloud-walk potion and passage via hot air balloon. This was my chance to find out the truth at last.
Time to begin.
One potion and balloon ride later, I found myself in the massive cloud-based city. Buildings aplenty and...wow. Things certainly have...advanced since I was last here as a youngster. There were electronic screens on some of the buildings, and they showed a bit of a replay of the Running of the Leaves event that had concluded down in Ponyville not long ago.
Damn...just how much advertising did the kid do? I couldn’t help but feel impressed once more. I’d have to let know about that once I got back. For now, I had to head to the resort hotel. The largest one the city had to offer.
A thought came to my head. Just how strong were these clouds if they could hold an entire bricky, metallic, and luxurious city? These had to be one of the highest forms of pegasus magic there is. Probably the highest--or at least the strongest.
Anyhow, it was time to act. I entered the resort and...wow. While not as spacious as Silver Shoals, this place sure made up for it in pure...luxury. Game rooms, an indoor ferris wheel, a massive food court, a roller coaster that was partially inside and outside? What?! “Wild Blue Yonder’? This place was utterly ridiculous. I couldn’t tell if I loved it or hated it. Wait a second, did I spot Lighting Dust as one of the cashiers?! I thought she was on a mandatory arrest within Appleloosa. Did she manage to ascend to a more lenient level of probation? I’d need to look into that a bit later. She even waved at me from where she stood, and I returned it with a wave as well.
The Suite was nearby. So with that in mind, I could find out just who had put Ms. Polomare through something like this. First, I needed to figure out just who matched the color of this bit of hair that we found near the scene. Next, I would tail them and figure out their intentions. Simple.
Thanks to that super long train ride, it was already nearing 5PM. Maybe I could get lucky and find my target early. Heh. If only. Well, I wasn’t simply going to wait around forever. If I could get some answers from those who spent time here, I could get--
“Welcome good sir! Could I interest you in a stay at our lovely resort?”
“Ah!” I yelped and nearly fell on my back. Oh right, I nearly forgot who owned this place. “Oh...it’s you. Wait. Where’s your--”
A mustachioed version of the same yellow unicorn appeared on my opposite side. “We have a two-for-one deal on our passes! Buy one for yourself and get the other at half-price! All you can eat at the food court, skip the lines on rides, and get a stay in our relaxing steam room!”
Flim and Flam. Unicorn twins that weren’t exactly the most trustworthy. They were known for their shady dealings around Equestria. But recently, it seemed as if they did legitimately try to run a proper business in the form of the Las Pegasus resort. If this was true, then I had to respect what they did. The agency didn’t have any problems with them in the last few years, so it was certainly possible that they put that behind them.
“Brother…” I put a hoof against my head out of exasperation. I was not in the mood for foolishness. Not from these two. “Ugh. Listen, I’m actually looking for someone. Grayish earth pony with a vermillion mane that matches this hair,” I took out the small baggie that contained the strand.
Flim--the one with no mustache, took a close look at the evidence. “Hm...doesn’t ring a bell. What do you think, brother?”
Flam took a look as well. “Hmm...you got me, brother. Pray tell, just who are you looking for, good sir?” he asked. Were they genuinely interested in what my mission was? Unexpected.
But of course, I couldn’t reveal everything. I shook my head. “Just following a lead. Don’t mind me.”
I turned in an attempt to walk off in another direction. But Flim stopped me in my tracks. “Wait, wait, wait! Are you sure we can’t interest you in a…” he paused and looked off to the upper left. After a moment, his face lit up with a wide grin, “the world famous poutine being sold in the court?”
“Indeed,” Flam added, “Made with the most pervasive and intricate spices from as far as the Empire to Manehattan! I’m sure you know about that, given that you’re from the big city out East!” he said with quite the knowing grin.
Wait a minute...poutine. The dish that had become a recent favorite within the agency back home. Hang on a damn second. How did they know where I was from? Did these fools really have that much information on me? This was extremely suspicious. Coupled with the fact that Lightning Dust was here, yeah, it made me skeptical.
So I played it cool. I pretended to accept their offer. “Hm...you know what, gents? I think I could find my target more easily if I had a room here.”
I saw the briefest glint of relief in that unicorn’s eyes. “Aha! We knew it! Another satisfied customer, eh, Flam?”
“That’s right Flim!” Flam used his magic to levitate a room key off the wall near the registration desk. “Kind sir, please follow us. We will give you a personal tour and let you find the most luxurious room you’d like!” They both walked ahead of me, into the velvet carpeted hallway.
Gah. Just what were they up to? Meh. I had some time before my suspected target would appear so I decided to play along for now. Even so, if these crazy brothers wanted to play some kind of game, they would have to dance with the best.
We took a few turns and an elevator floor up. On the way there, I saw Babs Seed as well. Was she on another vacation or did she have a job here?
The brothers led the way once the door opened. It looked like a regular hallway and doors that were part of the hotel’s architecture.
“Right this way, sir!” Flim escorted me towards the end of the hall. His brother Flam meanwhile, was looking off to the left and right. As if he made sure that we weren’t followed.
I just couldn’t shake how wrong this was. But if they were in on this, they would have a lot to answer to.
Flim opened the door to the hotel room, and walked in. Somewhat standard with a large bed and a TV on the dresser nearby. “Take a look, sir! Isn’t it amazing?”
I stepped inside. “Hm, quite so.” But I could immediately sense that something was abnormal when Flam entered as well. I heard the door shut behind us.
Time to fight.
But before I did, a magic spell was activated. The entire hotel room changed into an office of sorts. The carpet was replaced with metallic flooring. The bed and amenities were changed out for a desk and file cabinets.
“We apologize for the theatrics, Pale,” Flam said. His usual attire now swapped out for a black suit. Wait what? “We figured Sweetie Drops explained it to you.”
His twin had on one of these suits also. “We would’ve told you who we were,” Flim paused and peered out of the window for a moment before he turned to face me once more, “But well, things would’ve been a tad awkward if everypony in the lobby could see.”
“Hold on, hold on.” I rubbed the sides of my head, “You mean to tell me that you two are…”
They struck an action pose that wouldn’t look out of place on a movie poster as they spoke in unison. “Flim and Flam! Agents of S.M.I.L.E.!”
Well shit. Holy mother of Celestia. Either this was the weirdest fever dream I had ever experienced, or this was real. I heard rumors among the various agency stations, but no one could ever verify it for sure. It was like they had been blacklisted, but they were cool now?!
“I...wha...how?! Word had it that you were both thrown out for misuse of the Reflection Deflections!”
Film chuckled. “Oh that little mishap? Misdirection my dear friend! We’re still very much active.”
“Well, somewhat,” the mustached unicorn twin explained in a more somber tone. “We aren’t allowed to fight monsters like the others. We simply report any suspicious activity to Sweetie Drops--the current head of SMILE.”
“Well...there’s a bit more to it than that alone,” Flim added, “In reality it’s so that she can watch over us and make sure we don’t ‘go rogue’ with schemes again. We hate the constant surveillance, but we’ve earned it.”
“Wait--is that why I saw Lightning Dust working here?” I interjected.
Flim had to think about it for a moment. “Who--oh! The turquoise pegasus mare! Yes. Due to her good behavior in Appleloosa, she was moved up to this job here in Las Pegasus.”
Flam nudged his brother. “But at least we have the authority to stop the truly dreadful ponies. Remember Gladmane?”
“Uch. Don’t remind me. His ideas were utterly idiotic and served no good purpose. We used to be con men, sure, but we have standards to uphold.”
“Indeed. Now Pale, I understand that you’re looking for somepony, yes?”
Their words...all it did was create more questions than answers. But for the moment, I had to focus. If I could get any help, then I would most certainly accept it. “Yeah…”
“We’ll be on the lookout! Right Flam?”
“That’s right, Flim! If somepony is looking to hurt our busin--customers, we’ll put them on ice! What do you say, Pale? Will you let us work with you on this operation?”
These brothers were agents, got kicked out, and somehow managed to remain. I couldn’t tell if it was amazing or completely stupid. Regardless, I didn’t have many options here at the moment. So for now, I would accept their offer.
“Alright...this is your place, so you’d know it better than anypony. Don’t let me down.”
Life was officially too damn crazy.