The Price of Guilt

by Huk


Chapter 1

The sun moved party behind the horizon, turning the clouds in the sky into liquid gold. With a smile on her face, Celestia nodded at her handiwork. A beautiful end to a good day.

“Ah, Luna, come and take a look!” Celestia pointed at the blazing skyline. “Beautiful, is it not?”

“Yes, it’s... nice.”

Celestia cocked her head. She could recognize that apathetic tone anywhere. Luna was not in the mood.

“Is something wrong?”

Lost in thought, Luna paused, glancing at the floor. A moment later, her eyes locked onto Celestia again, and a solemn expression filled her face.

“When a few days ago, I attended the Nightmare Night Festival in Ponyville, young Sweetie Belle had asked me a question... A question I could not answer at the time.”

“I see...” Celestia smiled and picked up the tea she had made earlier. “Tea? That is a good blend.”

“No, thank you.”

Inhaling the delicious scent, Celestia took a sip. Her smile widened. “You really should try it someday, this one is truly delicious,” another slurp, another smile. “Anyway, what was Sweetie Belle’s question that got you so upset?”

“She asked, who had foretold the return of Nightmare Moon.”

Immediately, Celestia regretted the gulp she took, as the liquid backtracked in her throat and forced a very rough cough out of her.

“P-pardon me? Why would she—”

“Schools project, or... something,” Luna interrupted. “Tia, that’s not important. But her question kind of was. Do you know the answer?”

“I am… sorry, sister, but it was so long ago, I am afraid I do not remember—”

A tome of ’Predictions and Prophecies’ landed on the table with a loud thud, interrupting her.

“Open it at the ’Mare in the Moon.’

“Luna, I do not—”

“Then let me open it for you,” the book pages began to flutter for a second, then stopped. “This is the interesting part. Would you kindly?”

When Luna pointed her hoof at the piece of text, Celestia suspected where this was going, and that there was no way out. With a sigh, she locked her eyes onto the book and began reading.

’Legend has it that on the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will aid in her escape, and she will bring about nighttime eternal!’

“Tell me, sister. Who controlled the stars during my absence.”

“N-no one! We talked about this years ago – no one should touch...” Seeing Luna’s piercing scowl, Celestia knew her sister wasn’t buying it. “I... It is not what you think.”

“I think it is! A round number of years, the prophecy, and the fact that with your power, you were able to control the alignment of the stars. It all fits… This was not a coincidence, was it, dear sister?” Luna’s scowl intensified. “You freed Nightmare Moon!”

One part of Celestia wanted to deny it, to say she wasn’t the one responsible, to say she couldn’t get Luna out of that hell back earlier. But her twitching body was already confirming everything. A silent scream louder than a thousand words. Once started, it couldn’t be silenced.

“Celestia, what were you thinking?!”

“Luna, you have to believe me. I could not do it earlier!”

“W-wait, what—”

“I wanted to bring you back, I swear! The sun is my witness, I w-wanted to. But without the Elements of Harmony and with Equestria constantly on the brink of war with other nations, I could not risk it. I just could not...”

For a moment, Luna stood stunned, just gaping at her sister. With her head hanging low in shame, and eyes glistening with water, Celestia looked not like a princess, but some scolded filly.

Luna shook her head. “Sis... Tia, this is not what I meant.”

“I-it is not?”

Luna smiled gently. “Of course not. I know the best about what Nightmare Moon was capable of. But... that’s the core of the problem,” this time, Celestia cocked her head in confusion. “By bringing me back, you had risked the lives of every pony in Equestria. A foolish endeavor, sister.”

“L-luna, how can you say that? You were locked there—”

“For a reason…” With a sigh of guilt, Luna turned around. “Ever since I got back, I had a lot of time to think about what would have happened if Nightmare Moon succeeded... Famine, destruction, oppression... death. Even if we found a way to somehow grow food in the dark using our magic, other creatures would not be so lucky.”

When Luna turned back, her face was twisted into a scream of shame.

“Bringing me back was a risk you should not have made.”

The air filled with silence, until a moment later, a deep exhale from Celestia broke it. The sudden role reversal made her smile again.

“Luna... In your absence, I have done things I am not proud of. Mistakes that haunt me to this day. But getting you out of that hell hole was not one of them. When I met Twilight and other girls, I knew that after so many years, the new bearers of the Elements arrived. I had to give it a try.”

“And endanger everyone...”

“I had a plan.”

Luna turned and smiled ironically. “Yes, the same you always have... Let Twilight handle it.

“Hey! It has not failed me yet.”

Luna shook her head, not convinced. “I’m not questioning Twilight’s abilities, but we both know this was a gamble. Nightmare Moon could have hurt her or her friends.”

This time ironic smirk filled Celestia’s face. “You do realize that on the night of your return, I was not really hiding, right? I was there watching your every step. If Twilight was in any real danger, I would have intervened.”

“Fine, but what about the rest? She might not have discovered the Elements on time, or have not figured out how to use them. Or the Elements might have no longer worked on me. So many possibilities where it could have gone wrong... Tell me, did you have a plan B?” Just like that, Celestia’s smile faded, and her face turned empty. “Is that a yes, or no?”

The only answer was a sad, silent glance Celestia had aimed at the floor, admiring it like some statue of misery. She didn’t want to talk about it, but with her sister’s glare demanding answers, there was no way around it.

“Yes…” Celestia finally said, paused, gulped loudly, and repeated. “Yes, there was a plan B.”

“Care to share it?”

“I... I would rather not.”

“Oh, come on! Obviously, you couldn’t have defeated me easily without the Elements, nor imprison me, so... What was it?” Luna smiled. “Please tell me you didn’t want to bribe me with cake...”

Celestia didn’t hear the joke. Her face remained solemn. “Please... I really do not want to talk about it.”

But Luna kept pushing. “I think I’m entitled to know, and I’m curious! Spill it!”

“I… I planned to use the cleansing spell.”

Luna blinked and arched her eyebrow, then let out an ironic chuckle. She couldn’t believe her ears.

“That was your big plan?! A spell that is used to purge the dark magic from possessed creatures? Sure, the theory is sound, but do you have any idea how much power you would need to purge something as strong as Nightmare Moon?! It would never work!”

“Unless… You would combine the powers of the sun and the moon, and channel their energy directly.”

Luna rolled her eyes. “Please... Even you can take only so much! That amount of raw energy would…” Suddenly, her lips flattened, turning her smile into a petrified stare.

For the next few seconds, they both stayed in place – Luna gaping in horror, Celestia desperately looking away, trying to avoid her stare. The eerie silence that spilled all over the room was the icing on the cake, adding to the somber mood.

“Tia, that amount of power would have—”

“Killed me, I know,” Celestia smiled bitterly. “But, I would have taken Nightmare Moon down with me.”

Luna paused for a moment, but when she regained her composure, her scream echoed through the entire Canterlot.

“ARE THOU MAD?!”

“It was just plan B—”

“I don’t care if it was plan Z! This is just… just…” Still in denial, Luna frantically shook her head. “Even if it would work, what then? You think I would be accepted as the new ruler? Or that I would have been able to rule, knowing what it cost you?! How could you even consider that madness?!”

Celestia looked at her sister in silence, to see Luna’s teeth clenched and her cyan eyes glistening with water. Saying nothing, she walked towards the west window. A second later, the sun hid behind the horizon, and the moon popped up, painting the sky with gray and silver.

“This is the reason...” Celestia said, only adding to Luna’s confusion. “This is why I had to do it.”

“You risked everyone’s lives because… you were tired of raising the moon?”

“Because every time I raised it, the emblem of Nightmare Moon was there, staring. Like some morbid reminder of what I did to you. At first, I was able to put it out of my mind... You did what you had to. There was no other choice. Or even... It is all Luna’s fault... Those were the excuses I used, and with Equestria constantly expanding and threatened by its neighbors, it was easy to distract myself. For a while...

“But as Equestria grew in power and prosperity, I was able to solve more and more problems with diplomacy. This gave me the time to dwell on the past once again. And... And I did not like what I have seen.”

As the shameful memories began flooding Celestia’s mind, her lips began to tremble, and eyes once again filled with water.

“Equestria, the country you helped to build, had everything – peace, prosperity, and growth, while you were starving on that dead rock, forgotten and alone. This was wrong, a-and, I... I could not have lied to myself anymore. I had to get you back, t-to try to make things r-right. I just had to…”

Smiling gently, Luna walked up to her sister and wrapped Celestia with her wing. “Tia, I told you a million times. It was not your fault.”

“But it was… Those years I spent talking, settling disputes, and making diplomacy, allowed me to realize how much I failed you. It was my stubbornness and inflexibility that led you astray. If back then, I had the experience I have now, this would have never happened… But it had, and I had to watch the damn thing looming in the sky each day, reminding me of what I did. It was just... j-just...”

Celestia’s eyes opened then, and fresh tears the size of pearls began rolling down her cheeks, quickly followed by gentle sobs. Seeing her sister like that was a signal for Luna to move in. With a quick spell, Luna’s chest plate disappeared, and she pulled Celestia closer, gently pressing her against her chest and caressing her multicolor mane.

“Heavens, Tia. I knew it couldn’t have been easy for you, but I have never suspected it was that painful.”

“Y-you do not know, you just do not know how hard it was, raising that damn moon each day, knowing that you are there. I just...” With her eyes closed, Celestia took a deep breath and equally long exhale. “I would never dare compare my suffering to yours, Luna. But years of looking at that moon left scars that will never heal...”

There was a short pause, then a compassionate smile filled Luna’s face. “Oh, you big silly filly...” Luna tightened her embrace and let a few tears of her own. “We both need to stop doing it to each other.”

Celestia smiled. “Agreed.”

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that you decided to free me, but... The need of the many—”

“—outweigh the needs of the few. Yes, I know. My advisors were constantly reminding me of that. How I must place Equestria above everything else.”

“Well, they were right.”

“Luna, if we were blindly following logic alone, then we should be killing all the cripples and old ponies because they are nothing but a drain on resources...”

“We both know this was different.”

“Maybe... But it was a grave injustice, injustice I had to fix,” Celestia nodded to herself. “Yes, it was a gamble, yes, there was no guarantee of success, and even with all the precautions, it could have ended up in disaster. But for the last fifty years of research, I was making no progress. I was as ready as I would ever be. It was then or never. I needed to do it, for you, for me… for both of us.”

Luna shook her head. “Well, for what’s worth, I’m glad you did what you did. But I thought you were past blaming yourself. Now, I can see that’s not true.”

“You don’t know the half of it. The blame just comes and goes,” Celestia let out a guilty sight, yet again. “Ever since you returned, some ponies say I should blast myself to the moon for what I did. There are times I believe they are right...”

After a moment of silence, Celestia glanced up to see Luna staring at her with a cold, formal gaze once again.

“Luna? Is something wrong?”

“No, I just never consider what you just said. But... I must say I like the idea,” Celestia’s eyes widened in shock. “Yes, sister. A few months on that rock would be a proper punishment for all those cakes you stole from the fridge lately. And moon diet would do wonders for that fat flank of yours.”

Luna waited for Celestia to tilt her head in confusion, before smirking with a chuckle. Her giggle put some red on Celestia’s cheeks.

“I... I am not fat! I just have big bones!”

“That are filled with frosting.”

Celestia frowned, only widening Luna’s smirk. “Watch it, little sister!”

“Or what? You’re gonna blast me to the moon?”

Celestia opened her mouth to counter but quickly closed it, pouting. “... that was just mean!”

“Well, I’m the evil sister, what did you expect?” Luna winked.

They both let out a chuckle, and a joyful mood filled the chamber again. Until...

“Princess Celestia, Princess Luna! I’m glad I found you!” Twilight teleported inside the room, sweating, her eyes shrunken in panic. “We got a problem!”

“What is going on?”

“Sweetie Belle asked me about the origins of Nightmare Moon, and after some quick research, I realized that someone freed her, on purpose. The culprit must still be on the loose! We need to find him! Who knows what fiendish plots he is planning next!”

Luna glanced at her troubled sister with a wide smirk, and whispered, “I bet you ten bits she’s gonna faint once you tell her.”

Celestia just sighed, already feeling the headache coming on...