That night Lorraine found herself back in the Velvet Room. The silence of the library-like room was unsettling to the already rattled doe. The stress from the fight with Sir Pentious was still fresh in her mind, the sharp pang of terror at the idea of Alastor dying from poison, the horror that she was the one targeted and the desire to run, flee, hide! were still clouding her thoughts in a foggy loop of stressful misery and meekness. Victoria looked almost like a doll as she sat in the chair across from her.
"You faced a frightening opponent but that was merely the beginning of the trials that lay before you," The pony said sadly. "Your bonds with others have truly proven useful to you have they not?"
"Who are you?" Lorraine asked tiredly.
I don't want to hear this
"Where's Igor? Why isn't there any music?"
This place is supposed to be safe, why doesn't it feel safe?
Victoria blinked. "I'm sorry what?"
I can't do this.
No More.
"Okay, I'm done," the doe sighed. "I'm done..."
I can't- I just can't!
The mare stood up and opened her mouth to protest-
She was gone, the "room" shattered like glass and the doe was left standing in a deep blue, misty void filled with glittering stars. The movement of the mist was mesmerizing and the blue expanse soothed the doe's frazzled nerves.
I...I'm really not cut out for this hero bullshit. But I had to try, I had to do something. I'm sick of being powerless, I'm sick of being pulled into the spotlight. I don't want to be special, not in that way- I just want the people I choose to care about to be happy and safe.
I want to be happy and safe with them.
A blue butterfly flew past her as the gentle notes of a piano filled the quiet ambiance with a calming, familiar melody. It was soon joined by a voice, feminine and singing along with wordless, beautiful operatic vocals... along with a second voice that the doe took a second to place.
Her own.
"I am Thou, Thou art I!"
Her own voice spoke to her, filled with a sense of resolve and passion that harkened back to days long gone. Days standing up to schoolyard bullies, the hardships of an uncaring school system, the joy of learning what real friendship and comradery were like after graduation. The simple wonder and curiosity that came with her favorite pieces of media. It brought to mind the quiet vulnerability she'd learnt was perfectly acceptable to have and the comfort and safety that went with it when she and John became a couple. Awkward conversations, fears and worried shared without judgement and the long talks about everything and nothing.
"I am Thy compassion, Thy Heart of Hearts. Thy spear that rallies against the Heavens and Thy shield against the Demons of Hell itself. Thou seeest thy fear as a weakness? Then embrace it. If Thine instinct is to run, then run! Hide! This is Thy life and to Hell with those would try to take what is Thine!"
"Take Thy treasured companions and run wild with them, for if the powers that be wish to control Thee, tame Thee... They must first catch Thee!"
"They Will Never Catch Us!"
Lorraine let the music wash over her as she processed it all. Her Shadow, her inner self continued to speak.
"Thou art not bound to the rules of the game, it is merely... a stepping stone towards Thy true power..."
"The will, the creativity and power of Thy own imagination is within Thine grasp."
"Your will shall be made manifest. This power is Thine and Thine alone. Thou art The Cadmean Vixen..."
"Accept it and realize your dream of salvation!"
The doe blinked and was suddenly face-to-face... with herself. It was like looking in a mirror, except her doppelganger had eyes that gold an otherworldly shade of yellow. Her other self smiled as if reuniting with an old friend.
"From this moment forth, Thou art as Thy should be, whole and unrestrained."
"Thou shalt fall no more."