Say it with me: Not even Close!

by Grouch


We win theeeese!

After winning the Great Potato War and achieving over Five-hundred million potatoes, Technoblade finally has the opportunity to rest and focus on other subjects. For most people, a celebration is needed after a Victory; But unfortunately that just wasn’t the case for poor old Technoblade.

He has already been given his crown as the king of the potatoes, what else can he possibly want more? A gift for his efforts at climbing to victory? A simple ‘Nice Job’ to congratulate him for making it this far into the war? Those weren’t needed, as Technoblade has already received enough to be considered the superior individual.

Technoblade was not done with everything yet though. While sitting on his gaming chair, enjoying his life after a long, cold war, he glances at his youtube channel to view his previous videos that he made, before asking himself a question: ‘Was it all worth it?’

Was everything that he had put on his way into achieving victory really worth it? Was it really worth it to be sleep deprived and going too much into depth just to win a battle on a child’s game? Sometimes, these questions can overwhelm a simple individual as him. Everytime he succeeds at something, these questions would always pop up in his mind.

His inner-self screams, for he does not know.

He went onto twitch and saw Tommyinnit streaming some minecraft and decided to watch his content to see if he actually produces anything entertaining… only to log out of the stream after seeing only 10 seconds of it. He decided that it would be a great idea to collab with a minecraft content creator - Or at least one that used to produce minecraft content back in the early days

He placed his palm onto his chin, thinking of who he should collaborate with. He thought of great youtubers such as DanTDM, Stampy, Dream, Wilbur, but he went with the best option yet.

FitMC

After watching him tell stories of the oldest anarchy server in minecraft, he decided that a collaboration with him would be a great idea. He thought of getting taught by him about the ways of obtaining certain items that were utilized in combat on the oldest anarchy server. So he logged onto twitter, looked for Fit’s account, and dmed him.

Or at least, tried, to dm him.

What instead happened though, was that as soon as he sent that message, it did not manage to be sent. This was odd, especially for someone like Technoblade, who was known for his incredibly low ping. It can’t be the cause of his internet connection being slow, because everybody knows that Technoblade has a strong and fast internet connection. It might’ve been something else.

Regardless, Technoblade brushed it off and thought of it as some weird glitch, until he tried to dm him again. The message was once again deleted. He tried dming him a different kind of message, and yet it still wouldn’t work. This got to the point where he had to spam Fit’s dms, and, surprise surprise, all of his messages kept getting deleted.

At first, Technoblade blamed his phone for this, but that blame slowly shifted to his internet connection when he tried refreshing the app. After refreshing the app, Technoblade went and tried to dm Fit once more.. And failed. As usual, the message he had tried to send to Fit was deleted. ‘What could be the cause of this demonic inconvenience!?’ He thought. Poor Technoblade fell in vain on the boogeyman’s hunt.

He began to blame his internet connection for this, which was very unlikely due to the fact that he once ran skywars on 6 ping. The frustration kept growing bigger each second. Sometimes, life just wasn’t fair for everybody. He got off from his gaming chair and went to his Wifi router to see if he could find anything wrong with it. On his way there, he pulled out his phone and attempted to dm Fit to see if it finally works, but it’s just a futile attempt.

The surface of the Router seems fine, there was nothing on it besides dirt. But that’s not what Technoblade came here to view, No. He knew the surface of the Router would be fine, that’s why he came here to check the bottom side of the Router instead. He lifted it up, and what he had seen shocked him to his deepest core...

There was NOTHING!

Such a surprise was unexpected! It was as if life had struck him like a blade through the chest! He began inspecting unnecessary parts of the Router to confirm his suspicions, but there were still NOTHING! He began searching through more parts of the Router, hoping that he would find at least something that is related to this. Midway through though, his phone began ringing.

The vibration of the ringing was already enough to get him to check on his phone. He HAS to know what the cause for this was. Whatever this is, it was not normal. He pulled out his phone from his pocket, and saw nothing. Nothing but a glitched screen, implying that something might've broken his phone. He tried turning it off and on, but it just won't do anything. Confused, he began to stare deeper into his screen, before..

Pop!

His screen had cracked, and as soon as it did, it somehow sent Technoblade to fall back unconscious. Poor guy. All he wanted was to do a collaboration with a youtuber. Things didn't go well. Well, as the wise man once said; Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

Though, this was not the end. There were more to come for him. Things shouldn't end like this! Lucky for him, things would begin lighting up and set him on a new journey. Or at least, that's what we think.


Meanwhile..


"This is far worse than I thought. What you need is some medicine. Stat!" The Yellow coated pegasus uttered.

Fluttershy had kidnapped- Brought home Celestia's loyal pet Philomena to her cottage to take better care of it. The bird seemed damaged, and Fluttershy wanted to fix that. As the loyal pet of the most endearing Ruler of Equestria, Philomena has to look perfect. Fluttershy is aware that what she's doing is still considered kidnapping, though she brushed that thought off, thinking that healing the bird wouldn't take long.

The bird began coughing, which was definitely not a good sign. Fluttershy hurried and went to get the Poor Bird some medicine. She came back with a plate and what seems to be Medicine placed on it. She placed it down on the Table and offered it to the Bird For it to eat it.

"Here you go, Philomena! This will fix you Riiight up." The Yellow Pegasus said in the kindest way possible. The bird stretched its neck closer to the Medicine that it was offered, and sniffed it to see if it's an edible source of food or not. Of course, as expected, the Bird sticked its tongue out with its mouth opened widely, implying that it didn't like the smell of the Medicine.

"Doctor Fluttershy expected that!" She said with a friendly tone, giving herself the name 'Doctor Fluttershy' to sound like a caring individual to the Bird. She went ahead and grabbed a bag of bird seeds before proceeding to pour a huge portion of it onto the plate where the Medicine is on. She has used this tactic plenty of times to get her pets to eat the Medicine that they are supposed to consume.

"Always works!" She implied while staring at the camera. The bird stretched its neck closer to the plate and sniffed the crowd of bird seeds. After doing some sniffing, the Bird proceeded to jump into the air before proceeding to devour the huge army of bird seeds like a jackhammer.

Unfortunately for her, the tactic she used had failed. The Medicine was still there, but all of the Bird Seeds were gone. "Well, not always." She muttered, ashamed of her attempt at predicting what would happen. Though as this would continue to go on though, chaos would ensue.

Fluttershy went to grab Hot Red Soup for the bird to drink, but on her way there, she began to hear a loud yell coming from outside of her Cottage. Alarmed, she went outside to see what it was. The noise was coming from the sky. She lifted her head up and saw a Pegasus, Coated in Pink, falling down near the speed of a Small Comet hitting the Earth.

She began to get in her defensive stance by covering her head with her mane and both of her forehooves. Fortunately for her, the Pegasus did not land anywhere close to her. The Pegasus coated in Pink landed on the Pathway that leads to the Cottage.

Fluttershy went to see what it was, before gasping at the sight of an injured Pegasus laying on a crater. She placed a hoof onto her mouth before saying "Oh my, not you too!"

To be Continued.