//------------------------------// // I Do Not Like Them Here or There // Story: Trust Once Lost // by Greenhorne //------------------------------// “Well, that could have gone better.” Applejack sighed. “How is she doing?” Twilight inquired. “Well, I got her to calm down, finally.” Applejack said. “It looks like seeing Scootaloo’s eye set her off again, and then there was Rainbow - ugh, ah really shouldn’ta yelled in front of Green, that was stupid.” “I can certainly understand why you were mad at Rainbow,” Twilight consoled, “But she wasn’t entirely honest with you about why she was there.” “Ah could figure that one out on my own thanks, Twi.” AJ fumed, “Dash had her all alone ‘an terrified, and then Green was trying to apologize for getting Dash in trouble.” “What I mean is, she didn’t tell you the real reason she was up there.” Twilight explained, “Rainbow just wanted to keep an eye on them in case they started fighting. She wasn’t trying to ambush Green.” “Well that’s still not a good enough-” Applejack stopped and sighed, “Ugh, fine. Maybe Ah did jump to conclusions, but Dash should be completely capable of explaining herself. Anyway Green's in bed now an' - aww shoot." "What is it?" "She hasn't eaten anythin'." Applejack said. "Ahm the worst foster parent ever, I've had her three hours and ah've already frightened her half to death and sent her to bed without dinner." My stomach ached from hunger, and it was my own stupid fault for not eating that cake when I had the chance; Of course, the ache could also be the guilt I was feeling for screwing everything up. Not eating the cake was just one mistake on a list of many and at least hunger was a burden I could bear alone. There was a soft knock at the door and my heart seized. What had I forgotten? Did I mess something else up without even realizing it? Maybe I had made someone feel so bad that they felt like they had to apologize to me. My eyes widened. What if somepony told Pinkie that I didn’t like her party and it crushed her will to live because she wasn’t able to fulfill her cutiemark talent and- I exhaled sharply and took a slow breath in. Now my chest hurt. “Green, are you still awake?” Asked Applejack. I breathed a sigh of relief that it was Applejack and not somepony else; and that her voice didn’t sound upset. “Yeah,” I called back, “I’m awake.” Applejack walked into the room and in the dim light I could make out that she had something balanced on her back. “I noticed you didn’t  eat anythin’ so I brought ya somethin’” “Thanks, Applejack,” I said “Ain’t no trouble,” Applejack replied, “ can’t have ya goin’ ta bed hungry now can we?” It smelled like... apples. Of course it was apples. I didn’t like apples, but I couldn’t very well tell Applejack that now could I? I’m pretty sure she was still in a feud with the last pony that had dared admit that in front of the apple farmer. The apple fritter was no doubt leftovers from the party, but Applejack had gone to the trouble of reheating it and not just in a microwave (did ponies even have microwaves?). She was an excellent cook and the pastry was buttery and crispy - if it wasn’t for the filling it would have been a real treat. As it was, I was hungry enough to just eat it, so I did. I thought happy thoughts as I did so - Applejack would be able to tell if I wasn’t happy, and she would think she had done something wrong. “Thanks Applejack,” I said, “It was really nice of you to be thinking of me.” “Y’all were really hungry weren’t ya?” Applejack noted. Oh no, had I eaten it too fast? I tried to feel around to see if I’d dropped any crumbs in the bed; it was too dark to see clearly. “Ya know ya can tell me if yer hungry, right?” Applejack said, “I won’ get mad.” Damnit, now she thinks I’m too shy to even ask for food. I mean, to be fair, I didn’t ask for food when I was hungry, but that was only because I’m tough and I didn’t want to bother anypony; and I didn’t tell her I don’t like it because disliking food which someone gives you is immature... right? Oh god, I was shy wasn’t I?  I managed to suppress my immediate urge to say I was sorry. “Thanks,” I said levelly, “I’ll keep that in mind.” A few years ago Fluttershy couldn’t have imagined herself willingly going to a party, but so long as her friends were there it really wasn’t so bad. She had hoped to see how the filly she’d met with Luna a few nights back was doing, but it seemed like the guest of honor was too shy to make much of an appearance. Fluttershy could certainly relate. The party had ended a little while ago, but Fluttershy stayed behind to help tidy up a bit. “Hey Fluttershy.” Applejack greeted. “Oh,” said Fluttershy, “Hi Applejack.” The farm pony looked more worn out than she expected at the relatively early hour. “Ah was wondering if you could help me with somethin’” Applejack said, “When I’m dealin’ with Green Ah’m honestly a mite lost an - well I don’t mean any offense, but you have experience with this sort of thing, don’t you?” “Oh the poor little thing.” Fluttershy responded, “I noticed she was looking very frightened, but I didn’t want to say anything in case it embarrassed her. I’m afraid I’m much better with animals than I am with children.” “Ah’d ask you to talk with her tomorrow,” Applejack said, “But I’m not sure if introducing her to more ponies at the moment is the best idea. Ah know she’d agree to it, but Ah honestly don’t think she has it in her to say no.” “Oh, we’ve actually met before.” Fluttershy admitted. Applejack gave a confused look. “At the party?” “Oh,” said Fluttershy, “No I saw her in a dream.” “Princess Luna?” Applejack surmised. “I was very surprised when Luna contacted me in my dream to ask for help, but when she told me there was a filly lost in the forest I just couldn’t say no.” The pegasus shrunk in on herself. “She knew who I was but she was still afraid, trying to make herself look smaller.” She explained, “I don’t want to be mean, but she was acting like a little bunny, I think just having us be so much larger than her made her freeze up. When I was down at her eye level she was much less afraid.” The earth pony had a thoughtful expression. “She knew who Ah was too,” Applejack explained, “An’ she thought I had magical honesty powers that would make her spill all her secrets. She was so frightened to speak with me that she threw up.” “Oh!” Fluttershy gasped. “My.” “We managed to get that misunderstanding cleared up,” Applejack explained, “But it makes me wonder what ponies have been saying about us. Are we really that famous?” “I had no idea,” said Fluttershy, “We should probably ask Rarity about that I’m sure she would know.” “Well that troubling revelation aside, what I wanted to ask you about was how I can help with her anxiety.” Applejack said, “What helps you when you’re feeling anxious?” “Oh,” Fluttershy traced a circle on the floor with her hoof, “I mean, you know I like animals. Animals don’t frighten me like ponies do because they’re not cruel.” She paused, realizing what she was saying, and started to backtrack. “I mean, not that all ponies are cruel, or even most ponies-” “It’s alright Shy,” Applejack consoled, “Ah know what ya mean.” “With animals I can understand what they want from me, and I know I won’t say the wrong thing and embarrass myself, or hurt somepony’s feelings, so I can just be myself.” Fluttershy slumped a bit. “I don’t know if Green likes animals though,” said Fluttershy, “I know some ponies can find them scary because they don’t understand.” “Is there a way I should be speaking with Green when she’s anxious? Things Ah should be sayin’?” Applejack questioned. “Ah got a whole bunch o’ advice from Dayglow but Ah’m not sure Ah understood all of it.” “Well when I’m feeling overwhelmed I like to wrap myself in a blanket and drink some tea. I like knitting too, it helps take my mind off things.” Fluttershy explained before looking down at the floor, “To be honest, when it used to get really bad there were weeks where I could barely make myself get out of bed. Rainbow came to check on me and bring me food - she was really worried about me. I’m really glad to have friends like you I can talk to now, when I was just relying on Dash I felt like such a burden sometimes.” “So Ah need to find Green some friends?” Applejack asked. “Oh, no!” exclaimed Fluttershy, “I mean, yes, but... I don’t know. I certainly know I wouldn’t have appreciated anypony trying to force me to socialize with other ponies, but... maybe if they had I would have been better off? The first time I was really forced to interact with other ponies my age was at flight camp, and I got bullied because I wasn’t a strong flier, and because my legs were too long, and -” Applejack could see Fluttershy was starting to get distressed and placed a hoof on her friend’s shoulder. “Ah get the picture.” Applejack said, “Children can be down right rotten to each other. Maybe if ah help Green with her coordination and strength it will help her feel more comfortable around ponies her age? An’ if she’s comfortable being around you maybe y’all could drink some tea together? She’s having trouble picking things up with her hooves so she’d prob’ly find knitting a mite frustrating.” I had a much easier time falling asleep than I had expected. So much anxiety, so much uncertainty but, as soon as I had food in my belly, my body decided it was time to sleep and I had no desire to fight it.  When I saw Luna, still in her filly form, waiting for me in the dream I just felt tired. I’m not sure how you can feel tired in a dream, but I did. I just wanted to be alone and here was another pony I had to interact with. “Princess Luna.” I bowed. “I, er, good evening.” “Rise, my little pony.” Luna commanded. “We have much to discuss.”