//------------------------------// // Judgement // Story: Tales From Twilight Town // by iisaw //------------------------------// "I must protest in the strongest possible manner!" the Klugetown ambassador exclaimed. He was a large rubbery amphibian of indeterminate genus, but the richly brocaded vest proclaimed him as a creature of some wealth and importance. "Very well," Queen Twilight said, in a deceptively soft voice. "Go ahead, Ambassador Ghlurgh. I'm listening." She settled onto the cushion that the mayor had placed down for her. "You have denied the pony due process! He is our citizen, and he must be extradited to face our justice from the Council of Kluge! As is his right!" "There is no due process here," Twilight replied, her voice still soft. "We are a nation without laws." This was perfectly true—the town was lawless in the literal sense of the word. It didn't have a set body of legislation that became increasingly more complex as clever creatures found loopholes and work-arounds that needed to be addressed and amended. It didn't have a set of rules that, through mechanistic application, dispensed punishment tenuously correlated with justice. But if peace and stability were the desired outcome, a lack of laws seemed to be working remarkably well. Technically, Twilight Town was the most crime-free city in the world, which annoyed statisticians to no end. What it had instead of a dense body of legal code, was a single, simple to understand guideline: Work out your problems in a peaceful and reasonable way, or the Dark Goddess will settle things for you. That was all the explanation any sensible creature needed as to why lawlessness worked so well for the Twilight Folk. The final clause of the guideline was being enacted in the Town Hall that day. "And that is why you must let me take the stallion back to be tried under a system he is accustomed to!" Ambassador Ghlurgh continued. "This one wonders if you would argue so passionately for a Kludgetowner who was not so very wealthy." The white eastern kirin who floated just above and behind Twilight's left shoulder fixed the ambassador with a focused stare that the Ambassador was unwilling to match. A slight smile tugged at Twilight's lips as she replied. "That's of no real concern, Ao. I will make the decision, and I am notorious for fairness—no matter a creature's status or condition." The small group of witnesses quietly shuffled, and one suppressed a cough. While they would all have hurried to agree that their Queen's statement was demonstrably true, "fair" was not the first word that would have occurred to any of them to describe her judgements. "Then, how is it fair to expect a foreigner to abide by your system of non-laws, as if he were well-versed in the local cultural norms?" It sounded very much like a reasonable question, but it was not, and every creature present knew it. Someone tossed a folded bit of paper at the ambassador's feet. It was a colorful pamphlet with the title How to Not Commit Suicide in Twilight Town written on the top in a cheerful, friendly font. Everyone in the room recognised it. Some years before, a mischievous pony had printed up a stack of the pamphlets as a prank, and passed them out to the disembarking passengers of the first scheduled passenger airship flight from Equestria. Most of the newcomers had been puzzled, and some offended, but a few were delighted. The pamphlet contained a very good (if slightly exaggerated) summary of the customs, culture, and dangers of the kingdom, as well as a fairly accurate guide to the town, and the first print run of the pamphlets soon became a collector's item. By royal command, the pamphlet had been slightly redesigned, reprinted in bulk, and made aggressively available at all points of entry into the kingdom. Even with such a helpful guide, foreigners sometimes misunderstood how things worked in the city-state, but the Twilight Folk were understanding, and could be counted on to explain the situation with whatever degree of emphasis was required. In the current case, a rare consensus had been reached that being beaten to death would be sufficient explanation for the Klugetowner. It was at that point that Mayor Buzzy had called for Twilight to intervene. "You have no proof that he read that—that joke!" the ambassador sputtered, kicking at the paper on the floor. "To punish him for this so-called crime, that is not even specifically prohibited by—" Twilight held up a wing to silence him. "Some nations allow this evil by ignoring it or pretending it does not occur, but none openly condone it. Not even your own, ambassador Ghlurgh." She glanced aside for a moment, taking a deep breath to calm herself, and then continued. "You must forgive me for bringing up an irrelevancy, because the laws and customs of other nations do not apply here." "So you will decide his fate by simple decree? That is the action of a tyrant! Most civilized—" There was a blur of motion and the kirin was at his shoulder, a long curved blade held just under where his chin would have been if he'd had one. "You have been here nearly a year, and yet you are so foolish?"[1] Ao hissed into where his ear should have been. --------------------- [1] Rule #1 in How to Not Commit Suicide in Twilight Town was, "Never speak ill of Her Majesty if you’ve seen a white kirin any time in the last quarter hour." After a brief pause that felt like an eternity to the terrified amphibian, Twilight said quietly, "Don't kill him, Ao." The kirin immediately returned her sword to its sheath with a smooth motion and resumed her position behind the queen's shoulder. "If I am wasting my time advocating for my citizen, why am I here?" He flicked a glance at the glowering kirin and added, "Your Majesty." "You are here as a witness," the dark alicorn said. Pre-empting any reply, she turned to the waiting guard and ordered, "Bring in the prisoner." A sleek, well-fed stallion was led into the room. He was fairly disheveled, thanks to his earlier encounter with the mob of outraged subjects, but still gave the appearance of a prosperous individual. He immediately knelt before Twilight and said in a rush, "I am so sorry, Your Majesty! I know I shouldn't have… I know I should be punished, but I couldn't help myself, and I—" "I have no interest in punishing you," Twilight said in a level voice. The stallion looked up from his bow, half puzzled, half relieved. "I have one question for you." "Anything, Majesty!" "Will you give me your permission to alter your mind so that you will never do this again?" "M-mind magic? But I swear I will never, ever—" "You are lying," Twilight said, in a tone that caused the Twilight Folk to edge slightly away from her. "Possibly to yourself, but certainly to me. I ask you again, will you submit to having your personality altered?" "I… I won't be me anymore!" "That is quite correct." The alicorn stood up. "I… Please think of another way of punishing me! Please, Your Majesty, I beg you!" "This is not about punishment. To imagine that punishment would correct the compulsion that you harbor is foolishness, and punishment is worthless and hypocritical when it is merely state-sanctioned revenge. This is about prevention. One way or another, you will never abuse a foal again." The ambassador realized what was about to happen, and despite his earlier protests to the contrary, he also knew the character of the stallion he was trying to defend. "Your Majesty! Please hear me out! If you transform this stallion to stone, will that satisfy—" The look that Twilight gave him killed the words in his throat and he found himself pressed against the far wall without consciously deciding to back away from her gaze. "And kick this problem a thousand years down the road? No. That’s not how I operate." She turned back to the shivering stallion. "For the third and last time, I ask you. Will you submit to being cleansed of this foul appetite?" "But it will change who I am! No, I might as well be dead! I—" Twilight's horn flickered and the stallion instantly collapsed into a heap of gray ash. "Mayor Buzzy, please record his choice in the town ledger. Good day, Ambassador," she said, before abruptly teleporting away. Ambassador Ghlurgh swallowed heavily and decided to retire. Mayor Buzzy sighed and said, "We will gather up his ashes to return to his family. All expenses will be paid by the Crown, but can you arrange for the shipping, Mr. Ambassador?" "I will accompany them personally," he replied, trying not to let his voice shake. He hoped to be able to work up a plausible excuse to mollify the stallion's powerful family during the journey home. Blaming it all on the dangerous and possibly insane monarch seemed like a good plan. After the ambassador and most of the others had left, Ao opened the window shutters and leaned out. Below, in the town's central square, a large crowd waited expectantly. Ao pitched her voice to carry and added a tiny boost of the Royal Voice spell. Normally she would have never presumed to do so, but she was making a semi-official announcement. "Her Most Perfect Majesty has resolved the issue," she intoned. There was a murmur from the crowd. They had expected no less, but they wanted details. Ao knew this, but she preferred to emphasize her point with a touch of drama. She paused just long enough for the murmur to grow louder and take on an edge of disappointment, then she extended her right foreleg out of the window and spread her toes. A fine gray ash swirled out of her grasp and blew away on the wind. Inside her office, Mayor Buzzy heard the cheering and leaned back for a short moment to enjoy it before going back to her work. She was filling out a generous bank transfer for Zashira's forgetfulness potion. The mganga had refused payment for her services, but the filly's family had threatened to throw a gold bar through the zebra's front window if that was the only way to get her to accept something for her help, and Buzzy didn't need any more headaches that week. = = = =