//------------------------------// // Twice Shy // Story: The Twilight Years // by Kendrick //------------------------------// Twilight sat there in Rarity’s kitchen and tried to enjoy the pleasant chatter, but couldn’t. While it was nice to see Fluttershy so relaxed and trading comments with Rarity between sips of tea, Twilight was mostly silent. A deep dread was building in the bottom of her stomach. No matter how much she told herself that now was a terrible time to talk to Fluttershy, and no matter how true it was that she was feeling worn down by the repeated use of a complex spell, the truth was that she had lied to Fluttershy. There was no doubt that Fluttershy would understand, the mare had a supernatural reserve of forgiveness, but it would hurt her feelings just the same. Twilight was already worried about her friend feeling hurt at the deception she was going to reveal, letting another lie continue on top of it would only make matters worse. On top of that was the fact that Rarity was acting for all the world that she hadn’t revealed anything more important than a desire to restyle her mane. She supposed that she should be grateful that Rarity was taking things so in stride. Having her here when she told Fluttershy might make things much easier. Twilight just wished that she had gotten a few moments to find out how Rarity really felt about the whole thing. It was far too easy to believe that her friend was just being gracious in front of Fluttershy. Maintaining good appearances is very important after all. Without realizing it, Twilight’s ears had gone flat and she was gritting her teeth as she mentally prepared to broach the subject. Just thinking about casting the spell again made her head want to ache. For the first time since she had taken over Twilight’s life she missed the power she had wielded as princess. There was no regret about being who she was now, far from it, but it was clear that the original Twilight had naturally been much more powerful than she was. Her thoughts were interrupted by Fluttershy’s hoof on her shoulder. “Are you okay, Twilight?” she asked, concern thick in her voice. “I’m fine. My stomach is just upset,” she lied “Oh no,” Fluttershy gasped, “I have some mint and sage tea at home that might help. It always makes me feel better. Do you want me to go get it?” “No, no. You don’t need to do that,” Twilight declined. Rarity sat silently through the exchange watching Twilight with a concerned, but knowing look. Catching her eye, Twilight gave her a questioning look. Rarity smiled warmly and put her hoof on Twilight’s. “I’m here if you need me, Darling,” she offered, getting a puzzled look from Fluttershy. Nodding, Twilight swallowed hard and looked at the table as she spoke. “I haven’t been honest with you, Fluttershy. With any of you until now, really. I have a big secret I need to tell you but before I can I would have to use a spell to bind you from telling anypony else.” Concern and curiosity were clear on Fluttershy’s face as she listened. There was only a brief hesitation before she nodded. “Of course, Twilight. What do I need to do?” Fluttershy asked with just the faintest hint of fear in her voice. “I will form the spell and once I have said the key to it, you’ll have to touch my horn to activate it,” she explained. Fluttershy merely nodded her acceptance. Once again the spell was preformed. The energy wrapped itself around Fluttershy as she hesitantly triggered it; her eyes scrunched shut and her teeth bared as she did so. A tiny shiver made its way down her back as the spell concluded. “It does feel strange doesn’t it,” Rarity commented. “Yes it does,” Fluttershy said in a near whisper. Twilight sighed heavily and forced herself to meet Fluttershy’s questioning look. “I’m not the original Twilight Sparkle,” she said flatly, somewhat glad that this was the last time she would have to go through this. “I used to be Princess Celestia, but we kind of traded places on Nightmare Night last year.” “Oh,” Fluttershy sighed, wilting in on herself. “I’m sorry, Fluttershy,” Twilight pleaded, “I really wanted to tell you before, we both did.” She really wanted to add “please don’t be mad at me” to the end, but knew that wouldn’t be fair. “Just think, Fluttershy, she gave up being Princess of all Equestria; living in Canterlot at the heart of high society, to come here and be with us,” Rarity added, a touch of longing in her voice. “So please don't be too hard on her.” “Oh no, it's not that,” she protested faintly. It was clear that there was more that she wanted to say but wasn't saying it. “You aren't mad at me for lying to you?” Twilight asked, perplexed. “No, I'm not mad at all,” Fluttershy replied, tracing circles on the tabletop with her hoof nervously. “Then what is it?” Twilight persisted. “Yes, dear, if there's something bothering you it's better to just come out with it,” Rarity urged gently. Fluttershy whimpered slightly and seemed to struggle with herself for a few moments. Her friends held their peace while she worked through whatever inner turmoil she was dealing with. Twilight caught herself chewing on one of her hooves before forcing the offending appendage to the tabletop. “I don't want you to think I don't appreciate you,” Fluttershy started in a near whisper. “I do. You've been a good friend, and a good Twilight,” she continued with forced enthusiasm, “It's just that....” She trailed off into mumbles that neither pony could understand. “What was that,” Twilight asked. “I said that it's just that she didn't even say goodby,” she repeated, barely audible. The three ponies sat in silence for a moment, nopony sure what to say, until Rarity stepped around the table to Fluttershy's side. “She would have if she could, Fluttershy, but sometimes a pony, especially one of her station, is bound by circumstance,” she said reassuringly. “That's right,” Twilight added, “Both of us wanted to tell you, but nopony can ever know this happens so we had to wait until we found the oath-binding spell. She has missed you all so much. That's why we've been called to Canterlot so much lately.” “Really?” Fluttershy implored. “Yes really,” Twilight insisted. Fluttershy seemed to brighten somewhat after that. It was clear that she was still upset, but she continued with the chit-chat cheerfully enough. Twilight was relieved that there weren't any signs of anger or awkwardness between her and either Fluttershy or Rarity as they visited. Though every time something tied to the Canterlot social scene was mentioned Rarity got an almost predatory gleam in her eye that made Twilight nervous. She had the feeling that some not-so-subtly questioning would happen the next time she had lunch with Rarity. “Thank you so much for everything, girls,” Twilight said as she was leaving. “Think nothing of it,” Rarity insisted. “I think we should all get together soon and talk about... things,” Twilight suggested. “That sounds nice,” Fluttershy replied, echoed by Rarity's agreement. “I think it sounds like a marvelous idea!” Twilight walked back to the library slowly. The afternoon was mostly spent, along with any hope of accomplishing any of the other tasks she had planned for today. While it wasn't how she had meant for things to happen, she had to admit that she was glad to have it all over with now. None of her friends had reacted badly as she had feared, so that was good. Time would tell if anything would change between them. In all honesty, she thought to herself, as long as she acted like Twilight, then they would continue to see her as Twilight. Looking past a pony's appearances was often very hard to do for even the best of ponies. But she was going to have to take a deep look at herself too. She felt herself picking up a lot of habits she always noted in the original Twilight that she had never had herself. Was she becoming more like Twilight? Would it be so bad if she was? Somehow she didn't think it was.