Fallout: Equestria - Red 36

by ElDee


Chapter 13: Bad Moon Rising

Chapter 13 -

“Bad Moon Rising”

“Did somebody say buffalo?”

I felt tired. Too tired to move. Although I remained blacked out, every now and then I would drift in and out of consciousness. I could remember that I had been shot in the head, but not much else. There was a part of me that wanted to cling to life, but also another part of me that felt like nothing mattered anymore. My memory occurred in flashes, to where I was still able to comprehend some of the things going on around me, but my sense of time was completely shot. 

When I was in a moment of semi-clarity, I could hear a faint voice talking over me. “No, no, no…. Fuck! This wasn’t supposed to happen.” I heard the voice cursing. “I warned you not to trust me, didn’t I?”

Was that Hotshot? I wanted to tell him some things, but I was too tired and couldn’t quite remember what they were. I felt the warm sting of rad-water being poured over me.

“Lucky for both of us, Jagged doesn’t know how your healing factor works. Sorry for shooting you back there, but this should keep you alive for now. Just stay there for a while and nothing should happen to you….” He sighed. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry it had to be this way.”

“For the love of Celestia, I really hope this works...”

Another flash of consciousness occurred and suddenly there were emptied bottles all over the ground in front of me. The sun was also much lower in the sky.

Stuck somewhere in between life and death, all I could do was feel the earth beneath me, and the occasional fly buzzing in my face. How much time had passed? I couldn’t help but wonder if this was the end? Yet there was a spark still alive in me that kept telling me that I had to get back and finish what I started.

As I tried to look up, I still couldn’t move, but I could sense someone else’s presence. Hearing a beep in my ear, I noticed someone’s blurry shadow hovering over me. Or something. My vision was too blurry. It could’ve been robotic since it wasn’t touching the ground but I couldn’t tell what it was. “Wow, so you’re still alive somehow.” said a tinny voice. “That’s a relief. Perhaps not too surprising, all things considered,” it said, sounding almost regretful. For being nothing but a discarded corpse, I sure was popular today. I felt like sleeping again. 

“Stay with me…” the voice urged. “It looks like you’re only barely conscious. Though if you don’t get help soon, you’ll die. I’m sorry about before. I should’ve approached you sooner. There was just never a good time. I guess it’s a good thing that you’ve made a few friends along the way. The Wasteland can be a rough place, after all.”

“Yeah, some friends…” is what I wanted to say. Though I was unable to respond in my current condition.

There was a short static pop in which the voice sounded broken and staticky.  “Damn. It’s hard to send and receive signals this far out… apologies. Honestly, I blame myself for letting you get wrapped up in this mess. I’m sure you’re dealing with enough right now, but you’ll have to get up soon if you want to save everypony.” It was almost as if the tinny voice was trying to sound sincere, despite being a robot. Its voice shorted out again for a few seconds, but came back moments later, though it was growing more quiet. “Got to go now, ... almost o ... -f time … I’ll see if t-… nything I can do... Hang o-”

The voice popped out again, and it was replaced by a familiar tune playing in my ear. The tune started to grow softer and more distant. Me? Save everyone? That was rich. I tried to stay awake, but I was too tired. I ended up drifting out of consciousness again and losing another chunk of time. 

Next time I awoke, it was closer to dusk. Was I going to die out here? I assumed with what little function my brain had left that I had hallucinated all that. It was difficult to tell, but I thought I could see a single twinkling star in the sky above me. I thought this was goodbye for good.

Except, something was happening right then. It started as nothing. There was barely a rumble at first, but the shaking grew, gradually becoming stronger. Something was approaching. I didn’t know what it was, but I could feel it. It stopped just short of me and overshadowed me along with several other large hulking figures. They spoke in tongues that I couldn’t understand, and one pointed a shaggy hoof at me. Whatever they were, they seemed to be able to tell I wasn’t completely gone. 

Were they here to kill me? I was probably still hallucinating. I think I might’ve been mumbling something. Then as I felt myself being picked up, I closed my eyes and lost consciousness.


When my eyes reopened again, they felt heavy and I found myself waking up in a strange place I didn’t recognize.

I was laying on a straw mat underneath a blanket on the floor, next to a central firepit and felt an intense throbbing in the depths of my skull. As I looked around, I saw strange looking ornaments and charms hanging all over the inside of what looked like a burlap tent. Tribal star, sun, and moon paintings danced all over its interior and I recognized pieces of old tech scattered about the tent. 

Trying to figure out where I was, my eyes passed over a skull, looking bovine in nature, and also seemed to stare back at me creepily. “What is this place?” I thought. Though the more important question was: How was I even alive?

Gazing off to the side, I noticed my clothing folded neatly in the corner. With my battle saddle sitting alongside it. Moving my body caused a dull pain in my head, and I noticed from the mirror at my bedside that I had wounds that hadn’t fully healed yet. Someone had also taken the time to wrap me in bandages. My healing factor also didn’t appear to be working either. It must’ve burned itself out after all that. Though I was alive. At least for the time being.

Examining myself in the decorative piece of metal that was polished to a reflective shine, I noticed a scar underneath my mane now and wondered if it was going to be permanent. It might sound weird, but this was the first scar I’d ever gotten in my life. I remembered being shot in the head, but I wasn’t fully sure what happened after that. My memories were coming back gradually though. 

What I did remember was Hotshot shooting me. As well as the other thing. How could I forget? And the worst part of it was… for a while I was actually starting to think that we were friends. Then he goes and does something like this.

Picturing him standing over my limp body only managed to fill me with rage. No wait- it filled me with confusion. Lots of angry confused feelings. If he was the reason why I was still alive, I could only take a shot in the dark as to why he would’ve even bothered healing me after all that. “He should’ve let me die,” I lamented. At least then I wouldn’t be feeling this way right now.

In my current state, I didn’t want to think about it anymore.

That’s when I caught the gaze of a strange tiny black bird watching me. It had burnt green tipped feathers, and was sitting atop some decorative furry boulder, watching me like it was staring into my very soul. “So you’re finally awake...,” it seemed to say. “Your journey is not yet over.”

It caught me by surprise. “Wait- Did you just…?”

The avian cocked its head to the side. “Did I just what?” it repeated. 

As I attempted to figure out if I was actually having a conversation with a bird, I noticed that the crow wasn’t actually the one speaking. There was another figure sitting in the tent with me, which had previously been sitting so still that I hadn’t even realized it was alive. The huge old beast with shaggy dark fur, dirty and tangled in clumps, shifted in place, causing the crow to fly off her head and perch on the nearby hanging bovine skull. She was a bison. One who wore a colorful poncho decorated in bits of scrap and trinkets found in the wastes, with a mask of red and white painted onto her face and a headdress fashioned from the upper half of an Enclave soldier’s helmet. It too had been painted with similar white markings and had been adorned with black feathers.

Upon noticing the Enclave helmet on her head, I immediately became defensive. Guarding myself in spite of my wounds. I held my breath, waiting for something to happen, although in my condition I wouldn’t be able to do much of anything. From her general demeanor, she didn’t really give off the impression that she was going to hurt me though. I relaxed my guard a little.

“Ugh, my head…” I groaned, feeling a sudden splitting headache finally catch up with me. 

I shook myself with a grunt, my mind was still trying to internally process everything. She didn’t sound like Enclave at the very least, and she did save my life, after all. “It’s starting to come back to me now. My name’s Roulette- ugh... but who are you?”

“I am Many Moons. Chieftain of the Stronghearts tribe,” she said, introducing herself. “Count your lucky stars that we found you. Or perhaps, unlucky, depending on who you ask.” Noticing me glaring uncomfortably at her decorated Enclave headgear, she assured me that it was just a relic.

“Well, I’d count that as pretty lucky… thanks for saving me,” I grumbled. “Stronghearts? ” I asked wearily, recognizing the name. “You’re those buffalo, aren’t you?”

“That is correct. Although we have a tendency to keep ourselves isolated from the corruption of what they call the “Wasteland”, we keep vigilance as to not ignore it completely.”

Nursing my forehead, I asked her, “Why am I here?”

“You’ve been brought here under strange circumstances,” she admitted. “A week ago, I received visions from the great spirits that told me an ouslander would come to us bearing voices of the past. One who may foretell of great misfortune. Then our scouts found you lying dead at the place where death’s stench is strong. Only you were not dead. Not completely.”

My head felt like it was swimming and I couldn’t quite recall what I was supposed to be doing at that moment. Cringing, I paused. “Wait. You said the word “dead”. Does that mean that I was-”

Many Moons nodded. “Mmmm. You had passed on from this world, but you were not completely dead either. The weapon you were shot with is familiar to us. Each bullet carries within it a different magic spell. It is more of a tool than a gun. As I said before, yours is a unique circumstance,” She then told me, “It is because you bear the marks. That is how you were able to survive it point blank.”

“...Marks? What marks?” I asked hesitantly.

“The green marks.” she answered. “We call them the ‘Mark of She’.”

Glancing hesitantly at my shoulder, I tilted my head. “Mark of who?”

“She who infects many in the wasteland, twisting things she touches into other things,” she replied. “Why she does this? I cannot say. It is something considered to be cursed and unnatural magic, but it was that power which kept you alive.”

Still confused, I remained silent after hearing this, trying to think to myself how this could’ve happened. When this might have been done to me. I couldn’t think of anything. Wondering to myself if it might’ve been back then, even if I wanted to find out, the Republic was already long gone.

Observing the grotesque scar-tissue again from different angles, I at least was somewhat thankful that it was mostly hidden underneath my mane. Whatever this was, saved my life apparently. Somehow, even though I was shot with a magic weapon. Wasn’t that how this thing was supposed to work? I guessed the scar made a weird sort of sense, at least…

“When we attempted to remove the bullet from your skull, you thrashed around like a demon, and it required the strength of our strongest warriors to hold you down. During this time, you screamed about many things. Particularly about some mare. Under normal circumstances, this would be considered... strange.”

“Oh, uh, sorry about that,” I said, but shrugged. “To be honest, I’m barely even sure how this thing works …”

The ancient bison nodded sagely.  “Mmm. Furthermore, there are many questions we wish to ask you.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Questions?”

“Alas, I’m afraid we must ask you why you’ve come here?’”

You brought me here,” I affirmed.

Fishing for something beside herself, “No. Though I suspect your circumstances were unplanned, you came here for a reason,” she insisted, holding an object in her outstretched hoof. “And with this.” I recognized the small recording device. She pressed the button, and the recording began to play and I heard Radar’s voice begin to speak out of it.

“You and I need to have a little chat, darling. You know full well why I’m here… I know about everything. You used Enclave social engineering on those kids!”

His voice was so full of anger. Much scarier than I remembered. My eyes opened wide at hearing those words. “H-Hey- that’s mine!” I said, quickly snatching it from her with lightning reflexes. I hit the pause button and breathed.

Looking surprised, she then demanded to know, “What concern is Radar to you?”

“Radar?” I had to pause and do a double take almost immediately. “Hold up a minute- You knew Radar?!”

Unsure of my reaction, she answered warily. “Radar was one of few friends to the buffalo. He earned our people’s trust and helped us in the wasteland when few others would. It was him who aided us in settling here, and we tasked ourselves to watch over this place in his absence. You however, we do not know. So tell us or we do not know if you can be trusted. How do you know of Radar? Were you attempting to find him?”

My enthusiasm dulled, and I barely scoffed, feeling a wave of depression come over me at that moment. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you? Never trust anyone in Dodge City,” I replied in a mumble. The crow perching nearby cocked its head at me. She asked me what I was repeating, but I didn’t answer.

“Ah, Dodge City. Yes, we have a long sordid history with that place. Enough to make this one wonder how you ended up where you were.”

I stared at the tent illustrations vacantly, but didn’t speak.

“You will have to tell us eventually...” she said. Was this an interrogation? It was difficult to tell if she was making threats. 

Searching for the right thing to say, I let out a deep sigh. “He’s... someone I used to know a long time ago,” I told her. “Radar saved my life when I was a foal. That’s it. I barely knew him and it was forever ago.” Staring back at the old bison again, I huffed, “Look, I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, but Radar’s dead. If there’s a reason I’m here, I don’t even know anymore.”

She stared back at me wide-eyed in disbelief. “Dead? Impossible! Surely he would’ve found a way to make contact in the event of his passing.”

I scoffed. “Believe me or don’t. I don’t care.”

“I sense no lies. How could this have happened...?”

“The Enclave happened...” I answered soberly.

“Wait. Then that would mean…” she fell backward onto her haunches and took a long pause, during which time she seemed to gaze forward breathlessly. Then her eyes fell back onto me for a moment, observing my every detail, until finally she answered with, “I see…,” as if she had come to some realization. “That would explain much.”

After that she seemed to have changed her tune a little from the beginning of our conversation, and I noticed she was looking at me differently. “Apologies for before,” she said. “I think I understand now. The real reason you’re here.”

I gave the ancient bison a strange look.

That’s when it all came rushing back to me. A look of horror suddenly cast over my face as I remembered everything. There was something incredibly important I had forgotten about! “Wait, what day is it?!” I blurted out. “How long was I out?!! You said I was asleep for a week?! You have to tell me what day it is!!!”

Surprised again by my sudden outburst, she held her hoof out in front of me to try to get me to relax. “Rest easy. You’ve not been out long. Despite the severity of your injuries, not a day has passed. The moon spirit still soars above in the sky. There are still hours left before first dawn. So you should sleep and regain your strength.”

Pushing myself up with a huff, I felt some relief. “Screw off. I don’t have time for that...” I huffed.

The buffalo stood up, using her massive form to block the entrance. “You mustn’t leave yet. We still have much to discuss.”

“Don’t try to stop me,” I snarled.

“Not at all,” she replied calmly. “Simply stating that you’re in no condition to go anywhere.” The ancient bison stepped aside and lifted the tent flap. “Try if you must.”

I grit my teeth, attempting to get to my hooves, though I practically fell over on my side again. Much to my confusion, I tried to stand up once again, but got the same result. “Huh?”

All four of my limbs felt noticeably weaker than normal. In the past whenever I’d been beat, no matter how bad, I’d be able to get up and go looking for fights again the next day after a good night’s rest. Now I felt like a foal attempting to stand for the first time. Only recently had I come to the conclusion that that had most likely been due to my healing factor, but this was still extremely annoying. 

Many Moons closed the tent flap and calmly sat back down in front of me. “After we healed you,” she revealed, “we tried to purge the excess radiation from your body in a purification ritual. Thus, you are in a weakened state.”

“Purge? You tried to purge me?!”

“As a precautionary measure, and for your own safety,” she answered. “We could not remove the mutation itself however, since it is a part of you.”

Her slow pace and nonchalant attitude was irritating as I struggled to try to retain my footing. “Ask me next time before you do that! I need that!” I grunted. “There are other ponies out there… relying on me-!” I kept trying to push myself up but my body wasn’t listening. Even though this meant life or death for the ponies I cared about. “I- I don’t care what happens to me... I’m… I’m gonna kill that bastard!” I panted heavily, trying to remain standing while the bison continued to watch from the corner.

I blew out a puff of air and stood upright. I’d finally done it! My knees shaking to stay locked.

“See? I’ll manage, like I always do…” I huffed proudly. Then pausing for a moment, I slowly tipped over and fell on my side.

I went silent all of a sudden. The more I started to think about it, the more I began to see the futility of it all. I remained still, staring out in front of me at my reflection in silence and frustration. Listening only to the sound of my chest rising and falling as I breathed. My entire body felt numb.

“You should be careful about continuing to rely on it.” she warned. “Your strength will come back to you in time, but if there are others you wish to help, then realize you won’t be able to do much in your current condition. Least of all, help yourself.” I would’ve been pissed off if I could feel anything at all in that moment. “Are you ready to speak now?” she asked.

Not feeling like talking to her, I turned my head away.

Many Moons stood up with a sigh, taking this as enough of an answer. “Have it your way. I’ll give you some time to collect your thoughts. Perhaps you will be willing to then,” she told me. Then she exited her tent, presumably to go for a trot or whatever buffalo shaman did in their spare time. I didn’t figure she would wander too far. 

“Help myself...?” I scoffed, but barely in a mumble after she’d left.

After, I just continued to stare in the mirror. Content to just lay there and stew in my own anger, I simply looked forward at my own reflection without saying a word. Occasionally I’d flick my eyes back at the crow who didn’t seem to look away from me for whatever reason. I almost lost track of time for how long she was gone, and left alone, all I could do was think to myself.

While I laid on the floor, I began to recount everything more clearly. How I completely froze up back there. Even now I remained slightly shaken by it. How I felt weak. Helpless. I hated that feeling more than anything. The weird thing was, that now I couldn’t feel anything at all though.

Glancing at the recording device in my hoof, it was the same one that Jagged played in Rubi’s office and had tossed into the grave next to me. The deeply curious part of my brain wanted to know what he said to her, but I couldn’t bring myself to listen to it. Whatever conversation that was, there was no way I was ready to listen to it right now. Jagged Knife probably had all the recordings of me as a foal and Luneshine’s research notes. Whatever he wanted them for.

I blew a puff of air to blow the mane out of my eyes.

It led me to question myself: Why did I even come here? Up until some moments ago I had been so sure of myself, but now? What was I supposed to do? I was beginning to feel like I should’ve just given up and gone to Friendship City from the start. Then maybe I wouldn’t be so confused right now.

“I came here to save Sunny from the raiders, right?” I asked myself, but then I realized after I got here that I had misunderstood our relationship. After that Jagged Knife told me he could tell me everything I wanted to know about the Enclave. That was most likely a lie, but I fell for it hook, line, and sinker. He probably intended to kill me all along, but then he found out he could use me. Then Hotshot, I didn’t even want to think about. 

“The thing is, I already knew the Enclave was still out there. So why even come here?” I asked myself in my head. “Wasn’t I supposed to save somepony?”

Every thought that passed through my head only made me feel worse. I knew I couldn’t just lay here all night. I had to do something. If only I could figure out what that something was.

Many Moons came back shortly after and asked me once again if I was ready to talk. I took a deep breath and gave a single nod. “I’m having a hard time figuring out where to begin though.”

The shaman sat down by my side again and listened.  “Start with what brought you here.”

Only two words managed to escape my lips, “Jagged Knife….” I told her, and her eyes immediately lit up as if she were already intimately familiar.

“Ahhh, yes. So you crossed paths with the one who chases Radar’s shadow,” she nodded sagely. “The one called Jagged Knife is cunning above all else. He knows the wasteland in the same way Radar did.”

“He beat me. I wasn’t expecting him to play me like that. He knew who I was. Practically everything about me. I didn’t stand a chance.” I said as I stared up through the roof of the tent, where I could see the stars in the night sky.

“I’m sure you noticed the sky opening up?” I asked. That sort of thing would be difficult not to notice, even way out here.

Many Moons hummed to herself. “We’ve been watching events unfold from afar, but have mostly kept to our own. Aside from the scouts who venture forth on occasion, it’s been some time since we’ve interacted with ponies of the outside. Though we’ve heard tales of the Lightbringer, and once the sky cleared we knew that the Enclave had been defeated.”

I sighed. “Yeah. Well a lot of things happened, and let’s just say most everyone I knew from back then is gone now. The Enclave took everything from me.”

Nodding sagely as I continued to talk, she seemed to be thinking something to herself. “Mmmm… I see,” she said, stroking her chin scruff. “Would be far from the first time this has happened…”

“I’m sure as far as the Wasteland goes my story isn’t all that unique. Let’s just say I grew up in it like most ponies, and that’s all I’ve ever known. But the Wasteland is gone now, and I’m finding things aren’t like I thought they were anymore. It’s even harder to do it without them...”

“Mmmm… ,” she nodded slowly.

“Something just possessed me to think that Jagged Knife could give me what I wanted. I told myself it was all for other ponies’ sake, but I don’t know anymore. Seems like he’s been making a fool out of me for the past week though.” I told her, recounting every painful thing that happened. “My reasons for coming here were slightly different, but right before I got to Dodge City, I heard that Jagged Knife had gone and killed a bunch of ponies I knew. From this place called the Republic. When I first found out, I just...”

“You felt regret?” the bison asked.

I shook my head. “No,” I muttered, “I wasn’t sure how to feel about it, actually. But the more I think about it, I think there might’ve been a part of me deep down that hated him for it.”

The bison looked confused. “Hated him? These were ponies you cared about?”

“No,” I answered, “I hated him because it wasn’t me who got to do it. I’m glad that they’re gone. Those ponies there hurt me when I was a foal and I don’t think I’ve ever forgiven them for that. It’s just that-  I thought I left that part of my past behind already. That makes me a bad pony, doesn’t it?”

Many Moons hummed to herself, holding her decorative rifle in front of my chest. She closed her eyes, putting a hoof to her temple as though she were looking inside me. “Ah, I see. It is beginning to come to the surface, but I sense there is still guilt hidden deep within you. What else is there?”

“Why don’t you mind your business?” I mumbled, getting annoyed, then let out a sigh. “Okay, there was maybe one other pony. Someone I was trying to protect, but I failed them….”

“Ah, this pony. Yes. She was the one you spoke of while you were wandering the realms in between life and death. Who is she?”

“She’s all alone like I was…,” I told her, feeling tears starting to well up in my eyes, “and I abandoned her. What am I supposed to do though? I can’t beat Jagged Knife, but I can’t just leave her...”

“Then don’t.”

I snapped back, “Look, it’s not that simple! I’m not the Lightbringer! I’m just some wasteland nobody! What do you expect me to do on my own?!”

Feeling overcome by the venomous cocktail of emotions swelling inside me, I went off on an unprompted rant, spewing out my emotional frustration all over her. “Everyone I ever cared about is gone now,” I said, “and all these things are happening to me that I don’t understand. What are those weird marks that appear on my body? What the hell is happening to me?! I’m some kinda mutant freak apparently, and I just wish someone was here to help give me the answers! W-Why did they have to die...?!” I choked. “I don’t know what to do with myself anymore!” After I was done, I broke down sobbing.

Many Moons blinked. “Wow. I knew ponies were emotional, but…”

I turned my head away and scoffed, rubbing my eyes and feeling quite frankly embarrassed at having done that. 

“It seems you are indeed quite lost.” the bison exhaled, “I can see that you’ve been through many hardships as of late. Mmmm, so this must be why the spirits sent you to me.”

She then held her cloven hoof over my body in various places, saying, “I sense there is something from your past that is keeping itself tethered to you. You are here, yet your spirit remains trapped in the Wasteland. It is obvious you would be struggling.”

“What does that mean?” I asked, replying with a cock-eyed expression. “They’re still out there. I saw the Enclave with my own eyes, flying over the Smokey Mountains. And I still hate them. How am I supposed to just forget about what they did?”

The old bison shook her head. “While it is okay to acknowledge pain, you must also be careful to not let vengeance consume you. Our tribe teaches young buffalo warriors that is how you lose yourself to the wasteland,” she answered.

I sighed. “And what if I can’t?”

“That is a path that you must trot on your own,” she told me, “but I believe you were sent here so that I could guide you to the right one.” I raised one eyebrow.

Another buffalo who had apparently been listening in on our conversation interjected from right outside the shaman’s tent. If I was less out of it I would’ve noticed him sooner. “Elder. Not to question your wisdom, but are you sure this is wise?” he cautioned. “We still don’t know if she’s one of them. Surely you’re not thinking of showing her that!”

Addressing the voice, but continuing to watch me, she answered. “Indeed, I am. I sense no murderous intent from this one, and I’ve determined that she means no harm. I believe that she’s one of those children from back then.” The ancient buffalo nodded to herself sagely. “I have a feeling we’ve been expecting her for quite a while.” 

With no ideas what either of them were referring to, I gave the shaman a strange look. “What are you talking about?” I asked.

“Makes no difference. She bears the mark. She could still prove to be a danger to us here,” the voice warned. “Besides, the spirit cave is only for trained bison warriors who’ve come of age.”

She responded to the voice dismissively. “There is more to it than that, tatanka warrior. You are still young in years. Radar entrusted it to us for a reason. Now enough. I will hear no more of this, Follows Crow.”

The voice apologized and didn’t respond again, though he remained averse to the idea.

She then turned to me and answered as cryptically as I’d come to expect from her. “In order to help the ponies you care about, you must first be willing to help yourself,” she said. Then she told me I must travel to the spirit cave south of the village and perform a rite of passage. There, if the spirits there deemed me worthy, they would bestow me with the strength I needed to defeat Jagged Knife.

I gave her an even stranger look at receiving this task, before agreeing to it. This was definitely the weirdest day I’ve had in awhile.

Many Moons stood up and shuffled over to the side of her tent, picking up a bowl that contained a strange looking grey-green mush which she dropped in my lap. “Eat this,” she told me. It smelled funny and didn’t look appetizing in the least, but my tummy rumbled loud enough so that I could hear.

“For the record I’ve been all around the wasteland and I don’t believe in any of this spiritual mumbo jumbo,” I said, but accepted it. Screwing my face at the initial taste, until realizing it wasn’t actually that bad. To be honest, I’ve had worse. They called it “buffalitos”. An old bison tribal recipe. “So this is going to help me, how exactly?” I asked with a mouthful of the stuff. 

“Eat. You will need the strength for your coming journey.”

I raised an eyebrow and swallowed.

“Alright...,” I groaned, finishing. “Enough feeling sorry for myself, I guess.” Reminding myself that I didn’t have all night, I got to my hooves and after some effort, began to move around somewhat. Despite the occasional trip and stumble, slowly I started to regain the movement in my body. “Show me to this spooky spirit cave or whatever.”

“Follows Crow will show you the way.” she said, motioning outside. I glanced at the crow atop the bovine skull, which peered back at me, then looked at her again. Admittedly, I was still a little unsure of her intentions, but I was desperate enough to go along with it.

It didn’t surprise me that most of my stuff had been looted by the raiders, but at least they left me with the clothes on my back and my battle saddle. Even an empty, weaponless one. Donning my jacket but leaving the battle saddle, I went through the flap outside the tent and saw the full moon hanging directly over me with a blanket of stars sparkling across the skyline.

Suddenly, I was standing at the center of a tribal village made up of burlap tipis, somewhere in the middle of a circular bowl-shaped canyon. It was surrounded by apple trees and various grasses with openings on the North and South ends. I was surprised to see so much green out here in the desert, even with a natural water source. I quickly realized that they were using the same sort of technology as Dodge City.

It was a refreshing change of scenery from Dodge City though at least. Almost relaxing in a way. “Wow, this place is amazing...” I awed, looking around. Usually by having technology like this you’d have others coming for a piece of it. It was hard to believe parts of the wasteland like this still existed in this day and age. Maybe I had been in “civilized” New Canterlot territory for too long.

A few other bison were watching outside their tents, but upon seeing me notice them when I stepped outside, they immediately retreated back into their homes. I guessed they must’ve been curious about me as well.

Only one buffalo remained standing in front of me. He was a bull so huge that I had to back up a little to look at him. He stared down at me. “You’re Follows Crow, I presume?” I asked.

He wore several black feathers and scrapped metal armor, with a red sun painted on his forehead. The ones I had met in Dodge City were only juveniles. This was a fully grown buffalo. Follows Crow nodded stoically. “And you’re the ouslander,” he replied looking down at me with his massive form. “Thought you’d be more impressive, honestly.”

“Hello to you too...” I replied deadpan.

The bison nodded in the direction of the southern canyon. “Come.” he said, twisting around. Then he trotted, heading towards the south end of the village, gesturing for me to follow. “I will show you the way.”

I raised an eyebrow, “Can’t you just point me in the right direction?”

He didn’t respond, instead trotting ahead forward. I rolled my eyes, trotting behind him.

Though as I came up next to him, I noticed some of the other bison were peeking out at me, watching me from their tents on our way out of the village. One of the young ones poked his head outside to get a better look, only to be pulled back in quickly by his mother. I knew what it was like to be an outsider from personal experience but never quite to this extent. This didn’t feel the same though. It was like they were spooked by my very being there.

My guide noticed my staring. “The power you possess is unnatural. It’s understandable for them to be wary.” When I asked him why, he merely pointed to my shoulder where the marks had appeared. He didn’t explain much beyond that though.

Two lit torches marked the very edge of the village. Follows Crow trotted past them while I held at the entrance for a brief moment. Although the way was mostly straightforward into a descending canyon, I saw other branching pathways and openings where someone who didn’t know the way could get turned around if they weren’t careful. Mistakenly thinking I had felt something before entering the network of canyons, I figured it must’ve been my imagination, and followed him down into it.

Climbing onto some natural stone steps, I felt myself stumbling on a rock as I attempted to follow closely. My weakened limbs were giving me more trouble than I was used to. I clenched my jaw, trying to keep balance, though I nearly tripped two more times on the dark path. Meanwhile my guide only slowed down when it was obvious I was lagging behind.

I made a strained grunt.

Hissssssss!” I heard the sharp hiss and rattling of a snake’s tail. Then looked down and pulled my hoof back with a grimace, seeing that I had nearly stepped on one. I went around it cautiously.

“Careful where you step,” my guide warned. “More than just salamanders down here...”

I looked back to my guide, who was leading me. “Follows Crow, right? Can I ask you a question?”

“Ask,” he said.

“If they’re all scared of me, then why aren’t you?”

The bison gave a snort, and replied. “This is my test, just as much as it is yours.”

I narrowed my eyes at him, “Do you have some sort of problem with me?”

“Yes.”

“You don’t even know me though,” I countered. 

The bison snorted again. “You bear the mark. That is enough. When you were brought to the village you were covered in them. The Chief seems to think there will be value in showing you the sacred spirit cave. I am not convinced.”

“Why?” I asked, still confused.

“You are dangerous and pose a threat to others. Whether or not you realize it.”

I started to get angry for a moment, but then I breathed to calm myself down, so I could at least attempt to be reasonable. “Look, I don’t know how I got this thing. I’m just looking for some answers.”

“Make no mistake, I will follow the elder’s wishes, but I will also not hesitate to kill you, should you try anything as they call: ‘funny’. Through our time in the wasteland, we developed special techniques that are especially effective in fighting mutants. Even were your healing factor working right now, it would not protect you,” Follows Crow stopped to shoot me a brief glare. 

I reciprocated. “So you do know what it is,” I snarled, my eyes narrowing into slits accusingly. There was then a short, but heavy pause between us. As he watched me back and said nothing.

“This way,” he then said, and turned down another path. Becoming a little irritated as the bison just snorted and ignored me, I watched him as he trotted ahead. Giving him a dirty look, I sucked it up and continued along.

That’s when I noticed a crude illustration of a buffalo drawn on one of the walls beside me. It seemed to be running in the direction we were going. I stared curiously at it. As we went, I began seeing more of them. Depictions of running buffalo just like it and the outlines of white buffalo hooves. Running. “But from what?” I wondered. “And to where, exactly?”

My guide remained solely focused on what was ahead of him. Not saying much as he led the way. Somehow he managed to easily traverse the terrain in spite of his massive bulk, sharply contrasting me and my slow, clumsy steps. It would’ve helped if I knew where we were going at least.

“Would it kill you to slow down a little?” I complained after catching up to him. “Hello? Mare who was just shot in the head recently.”

He replied with the barely acknowledgement of a slight grunt.

We travelled together through the canyon for a while and there were no exchanges. I grew fed up with the silence. So making my own pathetic attempt at small talk, I asked my stoic bison guide, “So… uh, go to Dodge City often?”

“No,” he answered flatly, replying, “Any wise creature knows that place is best to be avoided. It is the epitome of the worst corruptions the wasteland has to offer. Only the truly foolish or desperate travel there.”

“Fair,” I acknowledged, “but then, not every place in the Wasteland is Dodge City.”

He grunted. “There’s little difference to be had if you ask me. We were nomads before we settled here. Travelled to many places.” He pointed to the illustrations of running buffalo. “Most were… unwelcoming. We’ve seen the worst it has to offer.”

“I guess my experience was a little different than most…,” I admitted, “but, hey. I can sorta relate.”  

He snorted. “Do you always talk this much?” he asked.

Imagining myself wanting to punch out a fully grown bison right then, suddenly I stopped to look up, seeing something above. Some huge buffalo illustrations with blood running down their eyes had been drawn onto two slanted canyon walls here. He trotted past, ignoring them, but I wanted to take a better look. “Well, that’s not ominous at all,” I quipped to myself, staring up at the grim imagery. Then seeing he was getting further ahead, I went after him.

At some point, I thought I could hear something calling out to me. Though I dismissed this feeling at first, I was unable to shake an uneasiness that something was off in the back of my mind. I also couldn’t help but begin to wonder about this place he was taking me to. Or what would be waiting for me when I got there. The canyon walls only seemed to get higher the deeper we went.

“Um. So I’ve got another question. Who is ‘She’ exactly?” I asked when I caught up again. He had slowed to a more even pace now.

His eyes darted back at me with suspicion, before looking forward again. “I believe in your tongue they call her: ‘Nightmare Moon’.” he answered.

 I scoffed.  “Nightmare Moon? That’s just a little foal’s story. Princess Luna died at the end of the Great War. They say that her spirit helps watch over fillies and colts in need in the wasteland.”

“I am not referring to the Moon spirit, but Nightmare Moon.”

Giving the bison a disparaging look, I challenged, “How is that any different?”

“It is not an easy translation, but in our culture Nightmare Moon represents the corruption of the moon spirit and thus the corruption of Equestria into a wasteland as a whole.” 

Now I was even more confused than I was moments ago. “Is this like a spiritual thing?” I complained flatly.

“‘She’ who corrupts the lands. Twisting creatures into abominations.” he said. “Even now her influence remains. Despite the sun's return, she lurks both in and beyond Equestria. Far beyond this canyon as well, her power lurks like old world spirits. Creeps further with each passing day. And it infects you as well.”

That still didn’t really answer my question though. If he were a pony, talking in riddles would be what he had gotten his cutie mark for. I blew out a puff of air.

“If Nightmare Moon is real, how did she get in me then?” I asked. “What makes this ‘She’, so dangerous, anyways?” 

“You’ve seen the results for yourself. Echoes of what she used to be. Our tribe has long taught us to beware the wasteland, because it can corrupt the soul just as she corrupted the earth. You lose your connection to the spirits, and it is believed that if you lose yourself to the wasteland and die on the warpath, then you may never find your way back to the spirit realm. You forget what you were and end up stampeding across the wastes as a vengeful ghost for all eternity between the winds.”

“And that’s what you believe?” I asked, raising my brow.

He grunted derisively and I could hear him muttering under his breath about how he would overcome these trials. Even though he seemed a fair bit more grounded than the bison in the village, these buffalo were certainly a superstitious lot. 

Eventually, we took a turn and I felt like we were going up a hill now. My guide’s occasional grunts and the sound of his hoofsteps on rock were enough for me to keep track of where we were going without watching too closely. It was when I took a short moment to rest myself though, that I noticed my guide had quietly disappeared without me. I looked around, but he was nowhere in sight. 

I swore softly to myself. Then all of a sudden, I felt that odd sensation sweep over me again – the same thing I felt while standing on the edge of the desert. I quirked an ear in the direction I thought it was coming from, listening closely. It had been subtle at first, but now the voice was stronger than before, whispering as if it were beckoning me deeper into the canyon. I couldn’t explain it, but I felt it all around me. Along with the growing urge to follow it. I took a step towards it out of curiosity.

"Careful. It's easy to get led astray." Follows Crow said suddenly. I turned around in surprise, spotting the large-framed buffalo waiting beside me, carrying his usual stoic facial expression. 

Managing to shake myself out of it, I pulled my hoof back. “Noted...”

Then with a sterner voice, he told me, “Don’t lag behind again.” 

After that I followed his advice.

When we reached the mouth of the cave, I stopped and saw the entrance was marked by totems meant to ward off outsiders. Crafted from the discarded power armor helmets of enclave gear and buzzard bones. They certainly did the job, because they really creeped me out. It didn’t help that it was nighttime either. 

Staring inside, I saw nothing except for darkness. I could feel it though. I could hear it too. Somehow I could sense that the voice was coming from this place the strongest. What was this feeling? From a gut fear instinct, I tensed up as if by reflex, expecting some sort of wasteland monster to pop out at any moment.

Follows Crow’s placed a hoof on my shoulder and startled me. “You feel it too, don’t you?” he asked.

I exhaled, turning to him in confusion. “W-What is it...?”

“Her voice calls out from here. Though its true source lies elsewhere. Many scouts have gone in search of its origin, but none ever returned. Or if they did, they had forgotten themselves. Your journey alone begins here.”

This whole idea was suddenly giving me some really bad vibes. Glancing over at one of the Enclave helmets belonging to one of the two inanimate cave guardians, I asked him, “What’s inside?”

“Different for every creature. Just be careful to stay on the path.”

Staring at him directly, I asked softly, “Hey. You’ve run into the Enclave before, haven’t you?”

It seemed as if he had little interest in recounting the story. “Not personally. It was before my time,” he snorted.

I frowned, trying to sound sincere and offer sympathy. “For what it’s worth, I lost my home to the Enclave, so I get it...” I told him.

He paused momentarily before answering. “You and I are not alike,” he snarled, apparently not interested. Then with a huff he turned his head away, appearing stoic again.  “My task is done.”

I rolled my eyes and sighed. “Okay. Just tell me, what does this have to do with Radar?” I asked.

Looking back, he urged me again with a nod of his head to go in. “Mmmm. The answers you seek wait inside.”

Some part of my brain was beginning to have second thoughts. I hesitated for a moment. Glancing at my guide, then back at the cave. Groaning loudly to myself, I thought, “No time like the present,” and bravely trotted inside. My hoofsteps echoing softly as I stepped into the pitch black.


When I first entered the cave it was total darkness. To the point I could barely see my own hoof in front of my face. I could feel the call stronger in here, and it was all around me. Smothering my other senses. All I could do was feel around and keep putting one hoof in front of the other, and pray that I was going the right direction.

“Hello?” I called out. No response.

Muttering under my breath about sending ponies along into mysterious dark caves and how everyone I met seemed incapable of giving me straight answers, as I continued to venture further inside, somehow I felt my eyes adjusting to the low light. Noticing the glowing mushrooms dotting the corridors, they gave off an eerie green glow but illuminated the path enough for me to see.

I followed along until suddenly, the tunnel opened up into a large natural cavern, lit by nothing but those strange glowing mushrooms, bathing everything in a soft green. As I looked up at the ceiling, and around me all I could see was painted illustrations. Tons of them surrounded me everywhere I looked. Depicting not only the buffalo but many other ponies I didn’t recognize, as well as some that I did. 

More of the paintings told other stories – stories about wasteland heroes and from before the war. All of it seemed to center around a great illustration of a balefire mushroom cloud and Nightmare Moon, but laid out in a tertiary pattern were also illustrations of two other sinister-looking figures. One laughing skeletal pony, and another sort of pony-headed, dragon, goat-legged thing. Whatever-the-hell that was. Then below, drawings of green flames over what I supposed was meant to be the wasteland. 

I couldn’t see a beginning or end to anywhere. 

I tried to look for a beginning and end somewhere, until I stumbled onto something I recognized. “Sun and moon? That’s Celestia and Luna.” Starting from there, the depictions seemed to be telling a story.

It began with Nightmare Moon being defeated and Princess Luna being redeemed by six friends. This allowed Luna to return to the throne. Everyone in the wasteland knew how this story ended: With a huge balefire mushroom cloud that destroyed everything. We were stuck in a wasteland for two hundred years until the Stable Dweller came along, and the rest was history now as far as most wastelanders were concerned.

According to the paintings on the wall, the buffalo had always existed alongside the sun and moon spirits. To live in natural harmony with Equestria and stampede in accordance to their sacred traditions and ancestry was their only concern over generations. Alongside this a pony who appeared to be Rainbow Dash seemed to be helping them sort out some issues with frontier ponies which ended in them all baking apple pies together.

“If only all my problems could end that well.” I quipped, suddenly having a craving for apple pie. “Or most wasteland stories.” 

Perhaps this was a painted history of their tribe. Though somehow it appeared to be more than that. Much more. It looked like it was depicting events in the wasteland, stretching all the way back to the Great War. Perhaps even before it.

“Was this what Many Moons wanted me to see?”

My eyes briefly passed over the image of a rather plain looking stable dweller unicorn. Though I had my doubts that she was the actual Stable Dweller. She was way too small.

From there I saw countless more drawings, some extending into other passageways. I could at most take guesses as to what it all meant. I assumed it had to all be a metaphor for something.  No, it was more than that… but it all just seemed like a bunch of random stories to me.

“Dammit, it’s going to take me forever to go through all of these!” I complained, hearing my voice echo throughout the cave.

One other strange image caught my eye though. One of Rainbow Dash. Except it wasn’t really the Rainbow Dash I was familiar with. She was grizzled and wore an old shadowbolts uniform, standing alone, instead of with the other ministry ponies as she was often depicted. “Maybe this is Rainbow Dash at the end of the war.” I thought.

Then suddenly I began getting that strange feeling again. Except now it was as if there was someone else in the cave with me. I looked around over my shoulder, but there was no one there. I sighed, feeling relieved.

Just then, I heard the faint sounds of hoofsteps. At the edge of my eye, I saw something dart out of the shadows and down another passageway. It must have been watching me. “Hey, wait!” I snarled, chasing after it.

I galloped after it into the next cavern, following the pictures of running buffalo which seemed to stampede past me. Though I slowed myself as I rounded a corner. Hearing soft crying, I stepped forward cautiously as I approached, but immediately stopped and my jaw dropped open, completely stunned at what I saw before me.

Suddenly, I was staring down at a young tan coated filly with an auburn white-striped mane. Cutie markless and alone, crying to herself. It was me. A younger version of me.

I didn’t even have time to ask myself how this was possible. The younger me sniffed and raised her head with tears in her eyes. “I-I can’t find my family,” she whimpered. “I came in here looking for them, b-but now I’m lost in this cave....”

After the initial shock wore off of finding myself face to face with my younger self, I knelt down next to the younger me. “Hey, it’ll be okay,” I smiled. “I’ll help you get out of here. I’m sure they miss you too.”

She nodded, wiping tears from her eyes.

Not a hundred percent sure what was happening, I knew that there was no choice in what I had to do next. Giving my younger self a warm hug, I told her “I know it’s hard,” holding her tight, “but you’ve got to be brave for me for now, okay? Be strong for me.”

“Uh, huh…,” she sniffed.

Leading her by the hoof, we went out the way I came in.

She grasped me tightly. Hearing the soft sobs coming from the younger me begin to grow softer and then stop as I led her out of the cave, I felt no reason in my mind to question it. It was just something I had to do.

As I stared down at myself, I found it hard to believe that I was ever that small.

We came to a split path that I didn’t remember being there. I looked both ways, thinking this was  as I tried to remember the way I came, but I couldn’t quite remember. Scratching my head, I knew I couldn’t have come that far. Though I figured my sense of direction was pretty good, so I was confident we would find our way out soon enough.

“Everything’s going to be alright,” I assured her again and she gave me a small nod. I gave her a big smile in return. Telling myself I had to be strong here at least for her sake. Or my own sake. Luna, this was weird... 

Looking around again though, I couldn’t recognize what part of the cave I was in. “Huh, I was sure that the exit was around here somewhere…,”  I said, thinking aloud. “How big can this damn cave network be?” Holding onto her hoof a little tighter to comfort her, slowly I was beginning to feel like the one who was lost. At least she had stopped crying though. 

My eyes immediately fell on some of the cave paintings depicting Radar. In which he appeared to be descending from the clouds into a wasteland, and another beside that in which he was fighting the Enclave. Another painting beside that one showed him gifting something to the buffalo, and helping them settle into the valley. Attempting to ease tensions between them and the townsponies. 

Approaching the wall I stopped for a moment, to take a closer look, and I felt a subtle connection to him. We both paused to look at them, and she smiled up at me, before continuing on together.

Everything in the cave was starting to feel a lot bigger, and I was covering less ground with every step. It seemed like we were going the wrong way, and the deeper we went, the more it opened up into even larger caverns. With all these snaking passageways I was beginning to feel like we were never going to find our way out. If I had been stuck in this place on my own, I felt like even I would’ve started to lose it after a while too.

Feeling a tug at my foreleg, I looked upward and saw a huge adult mare, leading ahead of me. She was wearing my clothes and looked just like me. No. She was me. “Everything'll be fine,” she encouraged me. “Just be strong for me for a while longer, alright?”

“Huh?” Staring back down at my now foal-sized body, I looked back up at the mare standing over me. Not sure what was going on, I kept on following closely. Was this even real? It felt like this had to be a dream, but I felt my tiny hooves solidly on the ground. “Uh huh…” I nodded. She took the lead confidently, and suddenly I was the one who was being led out of the cave.

As we walked together, I had no idea what was happening anymore. Though as I quietly observed some of the paintings on the cave walls, upon closer inspection I realized they were of me. The crude drawings were all illustrations of my history.

I managed to pick out one of the drawings of me from when Radar left me and my brothers and sister at the Republic. Though looking at it filled me with both nostalgia and bitterness, beside it, was another of us escaping into the wasteland together. It showed me meeting Fair Trade after that, and the day I got my cutie mark. Everything was depicted here. Even that time I played a prank on Zap to make him think he had horn rot when in reality I had just painted his horn a different color.

A little taken aback that they knew so much about me, I was beginning to get uncomfortable. I could only wonder who took the time to make all of this.

“This is getting way too weird…,” I thought to myself.

My older self kept checking back on me to make sure that I wasn’t scared, continuously assuring me that everything would be alright. I was a grown mare though, and grown mares didn’t cry.

Together we walked through the section of the cave that was dedicated to us, remembering our fondest memories, until we came to the part where the paintings depicted ‘that day’. I didn’t need to squint to realize what it was. The simplistic drawings more than got the message across. What looked like a town surrounded with red markings and ponies burning as black bird-like figures soared over them, forced me to cringe and I began shaking, but my older self gripped my hoof a little tighter as we passed and I felt better.

It was good having another pony here with me. Even if that pony was myself. Staring down at the cave floor as I followed her along, and I felt comfort just being here with myself, even if it was an extremely weird out of body experience.

Oddly enough, I looked back and noticed there was one more painting I didn’t recognize all the way at the end. Although I couldn’t quite make it out what it was, because it was all black and painted over. Like somepony had tried to hide it. There was another memory? I tried to remember if I was forgetting something important, but as hard as I tried, nothing came to mind. 

My older self didn’t seem to pay it much attention either, instead urging us to continue forward. I began dragging my hooves to try to get a better look at it, but she was too strong. I was no match for her strength at this size, so I gave up and went along with her. She merely smiled back at me, promising that we’d be out of the cave soon. I looked down at the floor with a sigh, kicking a small rock, and kept following.

As we walked together I thought to myself how this was too weird to be anything but a dream. At least I was here with myself though.

Then all of a sudden my hoof was empty, and I could no longer feel the warm embrace of her hoof holding onto mine. I looked up again to see she wasn't holding onto me anymore.

“H-Hello?!” I cried out, hearing an echo from deeper within the cave. Suddenly I felt scared and alone.

Frantically, I looked around in search of my older self, but she was nowhere to be found. There was only darkness around me. This had to be a bad dream. “Just wake up.” I told myself, and got the idea to pinch myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming, but to my utter horror, I felt it. I was still a filly. 

My heart started to beat faster, as I looked behind me and saw the cave had given way to a dark steel door at the end of a foreboding hallway. I went pale, watching it. The latch on the door twisted suddenly with a loud metallic clack.

...

I ran away screaming before it could open, desperately looking in search of an exit. What the hell was I supposed to do at this size? No guns and no friends, and I was all alone. So I did the only thing I could think of and fled in terror, running as fast my tiny legs could carry me.

Somehow the steel door appeared again in front of me, and was already waiting for me at the other end of the cavern. So I quickly wheeled around and ran in the opposite way, but it was there too. The door slowly swung open and I could see a red light coming out of the crack, and felt heat pouring out of it from the other side.

I darted away, screaming down the first dark passageway I saw in an attempt to get away and somehow managed to escape.

Okay, I was a filly now, but I could work through this. Beginning to run in search of the exit, it had been a long time since I had to run on such short little legs. Not to mention, the passages seemed long and impossible to navigate. The cave darkened the further back I went, with less glowing green mushrooms to light the way until it was nearly pitch black. Now I was more lost and alone than before.

Who was I kidding? I couldn’t work through this. 

Feeling completely lost, tears began to well up in my eyes as I slowly dragged my hooves, overcome by emotion. Maybe it was something about this place or that fact that I had been made a foal again, but I felt helpless. Even though it was nothing to cry over, I couldn’t think to do anything else. What else could I do?


I sniffed and sighed after I’d calmed down, accepting my fate that I was going to be trapped in here forever in this cave in a small filly body. Kicking a rock with my little hoof, I snapped. “Stupid cave! How am I supposed to get out of here now?!”

The rock skipped across the stone floor and landed at the hooves of another figure. I hadn’t even noticed anyone else standing there. It spooked me at first, but as I rubbed my eyes they slowly came into focus. There was a grandfatherly-looking sienna-coated old pegasus in a flight jacket, standing heroically in front of me.

My eyes opened wide with surprise, upon quickly realizing who it was. “R-Radar?!” I blurted out in shock at seeing him before me. “I thought you were dead!”

The pegasus spread his wings triumphantly though he didn’t say anything. He was just like the hero I remembered from my foalhood! He was everything I imagined him to be, standing right there in front of me. From my much shorter stature he really did look amazing. All that was missing was a shining backdrop behind him coupled with a slight breeze.

“Hello, uh... Radar?” I asked, smiling nervously as I approached him with adoration. “I-It’s me. Don’t you remember?”

Radar didn’t answer though. He wasn’t even looking at me. Instead he just kept standing completely still in silence.

“Y-You saved me a long time ago…. Hello?” I repeated. I could barely even see his face in this light as I waved my tiny hoof at him, even trying to jump up and down so he could see me more easily. Growing somewhat impatient, I repeated again, this time with a stomp of my tiny hoof, shouting, “Hellooo?!! Stop ignoring me!”

The old pegasus simply continued to stand heroically with his wings spread, not saying a single word. Feeling anger growing in my chest.

“Why did you just leave me at that awful place and never come back?!” I demanded. “Luneshine was horrible to us. Do you know how much stuff I had to figure out on my own?! It was a lot!” As I spoke tears welled up in my eyes, but I managed to hold myself together to say the words I’d been wanting to say for seventeen years. “There were so many things that I wanted to know from you, like who I am, who my parents were or where I came from. Things that I wish you had told me!” My little face scrunched, my anger growing with each word. “ And now everyone I care about is gone! You said we’d always be a family as long as we were together, so why weren’t you there for us?!”

Radar again didn’t reply, continuing to stand heroically.

“Ugh! Why don’t you just answer me?!” I screamed, all my bitter feelings from over the years finally coming out. “I hate you!!!”

After I said that, I threw a rock at him and he started to fade away in front of me.

“W-Wait, come back!” I cried, stepping forward and extending my hoof. There was a painful mix of emotions and regret in me immediately. Trying to grab at his hooves before he disappeared with my own just resulted in a hoof full of air. “Don’t leave me alone again!”

Digging through the rocks where he was just standing I fell down on my haunches and sighed to myself, but then I noticed something had changed around me. I looked up and saw that it had somehow gotten brighter. If only just slightly. 

Somehow, I saw that I was no longer in a cave, but in a small room. It seemed like the inside of a small one-roomed wasteland shack. Various discarded old-world relics littered the place. Scattered playing cards from incomplete decks,  A single lightbulb dangled over a roulette table with two chairs at either end, and crates stashed over in the corner. It was a room I recognized.

“You look lost, kid,” came another’s voice from the other side of the room.

Another pony was seated on the opposite end of the table. A pale old mare with a stringy grey mane, wearing a tattered old duster which had likely been to every place in the wasteland with her. A single string of dice hung from her wide brimmed hat. I knew this pony too.

 I stared wide-eyed at the old mare, relieved to see another familiar face. “It’s you!”

“Eyup. It’s me alright!” she grinned.  Like I remembered, her eyes always remained shaded and obscured no matter the angle, and she looked the same as the day I met her all those years ago. “Long time no see!”

“Hi, uh… I’m sorry but I forgot what your name was.”

“It’s Stranger. I never told you my name back then, so why would you remember it? Besides, I kind of like the idea of being anyone in the wasteland. It’s metaphorical like that.”

“That’s weird.” I scoffed.

She shrugged. “Well, it’s your spirit journey. So how’s that cutie mark been treating you?”

My eyes fell downward. “Okay,” I admitted. “Though I’m a little unsure what to do with it nowadays.” My eyes lit up as I realized. “Wait. So all this is inside my head, right? Could you help me get out of this cave, please? Pretty please?” I begged.

Stranger shook her head. “Sorry squirt. I can’t do that. On account of you haven’t found what you’re looking for just yet. You’d only end up right back here again in this room.” Then smirking, she pointed at my small filly body. “And you ain’t going anywhere looking like that.” The mare gestured at the empty seat across from her. “Why not have a seat then? Take a load off for a while!”

I cocked my head and frowned. “What am I looking for?”

She chuckled to herself in amusement. “C’mon, me telling you the answers would do you no good. You have to figure it out on your own. Trust me. That’s what this spirit journey is about. But I’ll tell you what, how about we make another bet on it?” she grinned, placing a single star bottle cap on the table. "You remember this, doncha?” She asked, pointing to the antique roulette table. It remained in pristine condition despite its age, just like how I remembered it. “Maybe if we play a game or two it’ll come to you.”

Scrunching my face in annoyance, I told her, “I’ve got too much riding on this to do another bet.”

“C’mon, I’ve got to pass the time somehow...” she moaned, spinning the wheel out of boredom. Dropping the steel ball inside, she watched it bounce around and fall into the slot of a random number. The old mare cursed under her breath. “Dammit, I can never get this old thing to work. I’ve just got the worst luck.”

I relented, struggling to climb up onto the stool with my tiny legs. Though I had to stand up just to see over the table. Stranger grinned, picking up as she balanced the steel roulette ball on the tip of her hoof.

Stranger frowned, shifting her weight onto the table towards me. “So I hear you got yourself beat by that loser Jagged Knife,” she mentioned. I couldn’t see her eyes, but I assumed she was giving me a look. The old mare slapped her hoof on the table. “What’s the matter? You should’ve been able to take down a pony like him easily!”

“Oh, yeah…,” I hung my head and gave a little sigh. “He had a recording of Luneshine. So I got scared and he shot me while I was out of it. He knew practically everything about me. Then another pony I thought was my friend betrayed me. I found out that he was at Starlight Bay on the night the Enclave attacked.”

“Details...,” she hummed disinterestedly.

With a huff I sat down on my rump and sighed to myself as Stranger fiddled around with the antique roulette table. “I thought things were always going to work out, but I lost everyone I cared about back then. Even those ponies at the Republic are gone. Radar too. I’m just… not sure how to move forward from here. I don’t know if I can do this on my own.”

“Please, lots of ponies have done it on their own. That’s how the Wasteland is. You’ve been getting by fine by yourself up until now.”

“B-But it’s not a Wasteland anymore! It’s…,” my voice trailed off briefly. “Well, I don’t know what it is. All I know is that things are different now.”

“You’re just making up excuses. We both know that it wasn’t just dumb luck that got you this far. You had what it takes to survive. If you had only embraced that side of yourself, like you did back then, then you wouldn’t be in this situation.”

“But what if I don’t want to be that sort of pony anymore?” I asked, my eyes falling downward. “They would’ve wanted me to be good. I just don’t know how to not live in the wasteland...”

Stranger scoffed.

“Jagged Knife said I was nothing but a killer, and he’s probably right. At the end of the day, I’m the same as he is...”

The old mare spun the wheel again out of boredom, her attention only half on what I was saying. “Take it from me, kid, Jagged Knife isn’t even half the pony you are,” she told me, though the compliment fell a bit flat. As she watched the ball skitter around, it landed in the wrong number slot and she cursed.  “Dammit. Can’t get this thing to work right. Well, that’s the wasteland for ya. Or maybe my luck’s just shit. Heh, why don’t you give it a try?” she suggested, nudging the roulette table my way.

Rolling my eyes, I picked up the steel ball and tossed it into the wheel. Watching it bounce around, to my surprise, it landed on the double zeros. “W-Wait that’s not right…” I thought, picking up the ball to try again. I spun the wheel again only for it to land in the exact same slot as before. I gasped.

“Why isn’t it working?!” I demanded, puffing out my cheeks. “This wheel’s busted!” Giving up, I looked back up at Stranger with mild frustration. “What’s the point of this? I don’t have time for games.” I stomped my tiny hoof, which admittedly probably looked cute at my size instead of assertive.

“So you know you have to get out of this rut but you don’t know how,” she mused to herself, fiddling with the wheel some more. “Hmmm. Say, is that old crab apple Fair Trade still alive?” she asked me, seeming to ignore my useless foal-sized anger.

Growing annoying at her for changing the subject again, I relented and shook my head. “Yeah. I went to see him recently. Sorry to disappoint you.”

She cursed to herself, muttering, “Aw dammit. Was hoping he’d have croaked by now. I’d be really sour if he somehow outlived me. Ah well. That’s how the wheel spins, I guess.” Thinking to herself for a moment, “What about that marefriend of yours? Are you two an item yet?”

“Can we get back on topic, please?” I pleaded, blushing.

Stranger frowned and seemed to look down at me. “C’mon, I’m giving you hints, kid! I couldn’t make this any easier for you if I tried,” she groaned to herself. “Don’t you have any other ponies out there waiting on you?”

“I mean, there’s Accolade…,” I admittedly meekly.

“That one filly, right?” she asked. “Mmmm. Reminds me of someone....”

“I promised her that everything would be alright...,” I said, feeling the guilt weighing on my tiny chest. “I don’t want her to have to go through what I did.”

“The only reason I ended up like this was because I wanted to learn about the Enclave. So much so I got obsessed with revenge. If I had just killed him from the beginning then I never would’ve ended up here.” Letting out a heavy sigh, I looked down at the floor. “I’m starting to wonder if maybe she’d have been better off if she had never even met me...”

Stranger scoffed again. “You don’t actually believe that,” she sneered, and leaned in towards me. Though her eyes remained shaded by her wide-brimmed hat, I presumed she was giving me another look. “Do you really think Accolade gives a crap about any of what you just said?”

“But it’s my fault to begin with. I screwed things up and put the lives of ponies who mattered to me on the line. Jagged would never have gotten as far as he did if not for me!”

“Always with the excuses, filly,” Stranger lamented, shaking her head. “You were the only one willing to give a damn enough to help her! So you made a mistake and Jagged Knife played you. Jagged would’ve done all that stuff anyways. It’s in his nature,” she moaned. “She’s a small filly who’s just looking for a way out.”

“What about all those other ponies I killed back in the Wasteland? What about all those ponies that died? I’m just as bad as he is. What’s the point of me going after the Enclave if I’m just getting ponies killed? It’s pointless. They’re probably dead because of me, anyways….”

Stranger shook her head. “It’s like I’m talking here, but you ain’t listening. Kid. We both know that the Enclave is still out there, but those ponies you care about? They’re still out there too, and you’ve still got a chance to make things right here, ‘if you want’. ‘Cus you and I both know that you’re the only pony who can save them. The Enclave weren’t the ones who hurt that foal. You need to learn what’s at stake here and now, instead of letting what happened in the past run your life.”

My eyes fell downward, contemplating her words.

“B-But I failed...”

“So you’ve had a run of bad luck lately? Learn to roll with the punches. You can either sit here forever like a scared little filly, or pick yourself up again and do what needs to be done.”

I looked back up at Stranger. “Isn’t it supposed to be cheating for you to give me the answer?” I asked.

The mare revealed a big stupid smirk on her face. “Because in your heart of hearts, you’ve already made up your mind.” She scooped up the steel ball in her hoof and set it down in front of me. “You don’t need me to tell you that there’s only one mare out there capable of controlling that ball of impulsive hotheadedness you call a personality.”

At that moment I felt something stirring inside of me, and the old grizzled wasteland mare urged me to take another spin at the wheel. I felt sure of myself this time as I picked up the roulette ball and dropped it inside, watching the steel ball bounce around wildly.

“That’s right…,” I realized. “It’s been so long, I almost forgot what was on the line back then.”

The roulette wheel began to slow down, deflecting the ball several more times. “Truth is, you always had the strength you needed. Even back then. You just didn’t realize it,” Stranger grinned.

“I know,” I replied, now filled with determination, “but now I know what to use it for.” The wheel slowed to a stop with the ball sitting in the thirty-six slot and I stood up from the table. Except now I was a full grown mare again. 

The smirk on Stranger’s face widened as she watched me and she laughed to herself. “Remember, it’s easy to look out for only yourself and cut yourself off from the world. Maybe that’s part of the reason why we were stuck in a wasteland for so long.”

“Yeah. I can’t sit here forever,” I agreed.

That’s when I noticed the steel door had appeared at the end of the room. Or perhaps it had always been there this entire time and I just hadn’t noticed until now.

As I gazed upon it, my heart started to pound faster and I looked back at Stranger. Asking her with a slight hint of fear in my voice, “What exactly is behind that door?”

“Beyond it is where lies your deepest darkest fears,” she revealed. “It’s okay to be scared, kid. Up to you though whether or not you want to face them.”

My heartbeat slowed, and I looked at the locked door again. Though I was resolute. “No more running away,” I said, and approached it slowly, reaching my hoof out. I could almost feel heat licking at it from the other side. Without turning around, I told the old mare, “It was nice seeing you again.” I turned the latch. Then with a deep breath I pushed open the door, and stepped through, ready to face whatever lay beyond it. 

Stranger laughed to herself and I imagined she was smiling behind me. “Likewise,” she said. “Now get going, kid.”

Meeting the same pony twice in the wasteland was often few and far between, but I was glad that we had at least gotten the chance to say goodbye. Even if this all turned out to be just some weird dream. Her voice echoed as I stepped out of the room, and the last thing she told me struck a chord with me. “Y’know? I’ve always had something of a soft spot for you...” she admitted. When I glanced back, both she and the room had disappeared. 

All of a sudden I was outside. Smoke from something burning filled my nostrils, and I felt the heat from embers licking at the back of my neck. 

I could see a red light casting flickering shadows on the rocky wall in front of me and I turned around to see where the room had once stood had now given way to my worst nightmare of ‘that day’. The beach house from my memories towered over me aflame, and I felt as though I was about to catch fire any moment from the heat. 

From where I stood, I could see the town of Starlight Bay burning below me, with all its citizens vaporized to ashes.

That’s when the silhouette of the Enclave officer stepped forth from the flames like a cruel effigy. The Enclave troopers formed out of the flames as well, following behind him and casting long shadows over me against the cliffside. I found myself paralyzed with fear as he took another step forward, and my heart started beating faster as he took another. The officer approached me slowly. He spoke, but his words came out in distorted whispers.

“I’m not afraid of you anymore…” I said.

As they surrounded me, their shadows turned to liquid underneath my hooves. The skeletons of my former loved ones reached out of the tar-like liquid attempting to drag me down into the depths with them and I wanted to scream. My eyes opened wide with horror as I saw charred skeletons of the towns’ residents crawling out of the shadows to begin clawing at my hooves.

“I said I’m not afraid!” I shouted.

I felt like I was sinking deeper into the dark pit below. Hearing the whispers of my dead family there as well, threatening to drag me into its depths. The Enclave and the officer’s shadow looked like twisted malformed monsters. I stood firm, even as the flames raged even higher, causing the silhouette’s shadow to lengthen like it was about to consume me.

“Hey! Weren’t you listening? I said I’m not afraid!” I shouted.

“You killed us…”

“This isn’t real. This isn’t real. This isn’t real…” I began repeating to myself. That’s when I realized that that didn’t matter if it wasn’t real. What mattered was me. I was afraid of them, and I had to face up to my fears if I was ever going to get out of this cave. 

I swallowed and puffed out my chest. “Okay, I’ll admit it. I’m still scared of you bunch of black-clad assclowns, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to back down anymore and cower to you like a little foal anymore!”

The oncoming shadowy figure stopped and paused. As if considering my words it appeared to back off slightly.

“So why don’t you take me on and fight me for fucking real?!” As I shouted at the oncoming darkness, it caused the silhouette of the officer to shrink back. The fires and shadows around me also retreated backwards. “What’s the matter? You scared? I’ll bet you are!” I yelled, grinning like an idiot. “Does it seriously take a whole squadron just to take down one little mare? Why not the whole damn Enclave?!”

The fires snuffed out, and the rest of the figures dissipated into dust. Until all that was standing in front of me was a faceless shadow of the officer blew away into nothingness as well. Then everything ceased and there was only calm.

For a moment, I was standing alone on a calm beach at Starlight Bay, staring across the water. Alone, but peaceful. It was a moonlit night and I heard the sounds of the waves crashing against the shoreline. I wore a smirk on my face. Though my victory was short lived.

The world around me started to fade to black, and suddenly, I felt like I was falling into an abyss. One that became darker and darker, and while I was there, I saw a horrible place. It was the dark place from the back of my memories. I couldn’t quite describe it, but I felt like I had seen it before. The only thing I could say for sure was that it was dark. Nearly pitch black, and all I could remember was the screams. The horrible screams that made my flesh crawl. The glowing spider veins began to crawl up my legs until they reached my neck. My eyes glowed green and I felt my flesh writhing as it consumed me and I joined in with the screams.

...

I blinked and woke up in the cave again, now looking up at the ceiling. I was wearing my normal clothes and back to my full-grown self again. Figuring a pinch wasn’t good enough, I smacked my face to make sure this wasn’t still a dream, and I felt it. “Yay! I’m back in my own body again!” I shouted excitedly, hugging myself. Though I looked around to make sure no one saw and quickly brought myself to my hooves, clearing my throat, “If I never have to do that again, it’ll be too soon.”

Giving the cave itself a suspicious glare, I exhaled and began to look around. 

Somehow, I had reached the deepest part of the cave, but this place was different. I now found myself at the center of what looked to be a makeshift campsite. There was a single mattress here, with a firepit, a workbench, and locked footlocker. As well as a terminal which was hooked up to a portable generator. My eyes followed the cable backwards, running up the cave wall and saw that it was hooked up to some sort of transmitter dish which poked out of an opening in the cave ceiling.

The strange call from before had disappeared entirely. All I could feel was a slight breeze now, coming from out of the opening in the ceiling. From it I could hear a soft whistling wind. “Did I imagine all that?” I certainly felt something.

Looking around at the illustrations in this part of the cave, I noticed one major theme that seemed to stand out from others. They didn’t tell a story about the wasteland, but rather a story of two pegasus ponies from a long time ago and how they shaped the fate of the buffalo during the war. Depicting two in particular. A rainbow pony and a lightning pony. Whom I correctly guessed to be Rainbow Dash and Lightning Dust respectively. Standing opposite, but side by side with each other with a ring of fire painted around the two of them.

The paintings seemed to suggest that they knew each other since before the great war. That they were once friends who had a history together, but they put their differences aside to fight a greater enemy. As I looked from painting to painting, the story became easier to interpret. Crude illustrations meant to be the machines of war seemed to be creeping outward from Lightning Dust over the left side of the cavern.

Weapons, megaspells and shadowy influence all emenated from her, and further out into the wasteland. Buffalo, zebras and ponies alike burned together in the balefire. I could almost hear the screams and dark whispers in the back of my head.

The buffalo apparently had tried to remain neutral during the war, but amidst these rising tensions between them and the townsponies, the war ended up affecting them anyways. So instead they decided to go somewhere far away where the war wouldn’t reach them.

That was all there was.

“Wait. That’s it...?!” I shouted in disbelief. Wondering if there was supposed to be another lesson here somewhere, I glared at the drawing suspiciously for a little while longer, until I gave up trying to guess the meaning. I had to know more about this pony. Who was she? What did she do? There was still a lot of missing information.

My mind automatically filled in the rest of the details I knew, that at some point later Radar helped them settle here but there was little else beyond that and even then it didn’t seem to fit together. “Maybe the terminal can tell me more,” I thought.

I slowly approached the desk that the terminal was placed on, seeing lots of junked high-tech looking magical devices and scrap metal strewn across it.

“Whose camp was this anyways?” I thought aloud, trying to guess to myself who else even knew this was down here. Though as I looked at the rusted spark-generator setup, I quickly realized who it must’ve belonged to.

Wondering to myself if the generator still worked after all these years, to my surprise, flipping the switch caused it to stutter to life and the terminal began to give off a green glow. I stared over at the blinking screen, seeing that it was demanding a password and scoffed. Absentmindedly striking a few keys, I groaned to myself that this was more towards Sunny Hymn’s field of expertise. I made a couple of botched attempts, to no avail. 

So instead I decided to focus my attention towards my better areas of expertise. Notably: milling about until I figured out what to do.

I checked the footlocker for more clues. Locked. Luckily for me, I was able to find a key underneath the mattress. Ponies always seemed to do that so often in the wasteland, that you’d think they’d come up with a better hiding spot.

 Fiddling with the key in my teeth I turned the lock and the locker clicked open. Success. Upon opening it though, a dusty old environment suit stared up at me, and I reeled back, until I saw that it was just old clothing. It was an Enclave science division uniform. One that had been left here a long time ago. As well as lots of audio logs, a memory orb with a note taped to it, and a recollector along with it. Though as I calmed down from the initial shock, a particular photograph caught my eye.

The photo was of a certain sienna-coated pegasus, except much younger, and standing side by side with another dusk coated pony. Both of them were dressed in Enclave science fatigues, with Radar’s hoof was around the other pony’s neck like they were pals. I breathed in and out. While seeing Radar in this way was extremely offputting, I tried to keep my personal feelings out of it. It made some sense that he must’ve had friends in the Enclave prior to becoming a dashite. He must’ve had others he left behind too. “Making a decision like that must’ve been difficult,” I imagined.

Looking at the note on the memory orb, it had not but a single word written on a note taped to it: “Danger”.

I picked up and pressed play on one of the recordings, and set it down on top of the mattress to continue to listen to his voice as I sifted through the past. Despite the audio coming out of it was old and somewhat distorted, I could make out his words perfectly fine.

“Hello, my name is Radar. If you know who I am, then you’re probably already aware that I was branded a traitor by the Enclave. I don’t claim to be a hero, although many consider me one. Truthfully, there’s a lot more to it than that. This is the story of my life.” 

“In my youth, I enlisted in the Enclave as a scientist. Not because I had any grand plans about changing the Wasteland, but but just because it was something I was passionate for. Working on possible scientific breakthroughs to make life easier for those of us living in the clouds. That was what I lived for. It was all I was really concerned with. That and weapons research. Lots of it. The research I’ve done has probably been used to hurt lots of ponies over my extended lifetime. That’s partly why I did what I did.  It was during this research that I began to learn more about the Enclave.”

Through the recordings, I felt a new connection to him that I never had before. I had begun to see Radar in a new light. There was much I still didn’t know about him, but like with other pegasi, he had seen the error of his ways in the Enclave and dedicated his life to trying to undo his mistakes. Except he had been one of the first to do so. I could only make guesses as to what caused him to change his mind.

“It was me who was tasked with performing an inquiry into the SPP towers. Or Single Pegasus Project…. To learn their full capability. Essentially, what it is, is a continent spanning megaspell matrix, but for weather. I’m not sure how many ponies realize how powerful that is, but put simply… something like that has the potential of wiping out all life in Equestria.”

Beyond that, things I began to stumble over in my research. The secrets. I learned the truth about the Enclave. I started to view the ponies I thought were my friends in a different way. The more I learned, the more I began to see the effects we were having on the rest of the wasteland. After learning the truth, I knew in good conscience that I could no longer remain silent. ‘Cept I was just one pegasus. What in the stars above was one little tech nerd gonna do? Nopony else had the guts to stand up to the Enclave since the war. Well, I showed ‘em what for.”

I stood up, then stumbled back over to the terminal and began fiddling with the keys while the message played. If there was clue anywhere in here to what the password could be, it had to be in these audio logs. Except there was like a dozen of them, and I didn’t have all the time in the wasteland to spend down here. Taking wild guesses: “single_pegasus_project”, “radar_is_cool”, “enclavesucks”, “enclavesniffsfarts”, all of them incorrect.

A dialogue box popped up, alerting me that I only had one more attempt before it locked me out and I growled in frustration. Then I heard Radar’s voice from the recording which drew my attention.

“Knowledge is the key. He who knows the wasteland, knows victory,” he said, and the recording ended.

When he said those words, I contemplated for a moment, then had a stray thought pop into my head. Turning back to the terminal, I looked at the blinking screen and started to slowly type out in the password Accolade had given me, pausing short of pressing the ‘enter’ key. “Could this be what it’s for?” I asked myself, hesitantly putting my hoof over the key. “Time to take a gamble.”

Suddenly the screen went dark, then lit up again. Showing what looked like a boot up screen, a small list of options appeared on the terminal.

“Aw, yeah! Look out Sunny! Roulette, hacker extraordinaire, coming through!” I cheered, then let out a sigh of relief, reading the new words on the screen.


The very first message at the top of the screen was from Radar: “Hello, this is Radar. Or, my message anyways... You’re currently using terminal no. 02, of a limited number across Equestria in which I have set up with limited EquiNet capabilities. You’ll be able to determine the operating status of a few of the terminals on this console. To lower risk factors though, I have kept their locations along with the total number a secret. Chances are if you’re using this, then you are one of a limited number of trustworthy individuals who I gave the password to in case of an emergency. If you are in dire need of my assistance, you can use this terminal to send out a distress signal and I’ll receive it on my primary terminal. If I’m able, I promise you I’ll do what I can to help.

PS: Of course if this is me using this login, then ignore this message. Ya dimwit.”

I snorted at the last part. Though I had to wonder what an ‘Equinet’ was. I deduced at least it had to mean that somehow this terminal was connected to the others. Scrolling through the list of commands, I brought up the system information, which showed many of the other terminals were offline. Though I could see that there were also messages that had been sent between the terminals. Most were from ages ago, probably before I was even born. Except for one. One message had been sent within the last year, and it was left unread.

Curiously, I opened it. It was from a mare named Dusty Diary. Reading through, she seemed to be trying to get into contact with Radar for some dire important reason, but wouldn’t say why. That name of hers also sounded familiar. “Dusty Diary, Dusty Diary…” I repeated again and again in my head, trying to remember where I had heard it before. 

Then it came to me. That was the name of the dead mare corpse me and Sunny Hymn found back in Sunvale. My eyes locked on the terminal screen, skimming through the message a second time. “Okay, what’s going on here?” I asked flatly. “Who the fuck is this pony?”

She was trying to get into contact with Radar while all that shit with the Stable Dweller was going on? According to her it was urgent, and it being the most recent message, probably meant that he never got it. Sunny Hymn had said somepony was supposedly after her? “Ugh.” I couldn’t do anything without the diary in front of me though. “Seriously, what could’ve been so important that she had to get into contact with Radar over it?” I asked out loud. “Or maybe-...?” I pondered to myself. “Dammit all. I wish that I had that diary!” I cursed.

Anyways, I didn’t have time to review it all here. Who knew how much time I had left before morning? Too bad. Sunny Hymn would’ve loved to hear about this. I just had to gather everything I could while I was down here.

Digging through the foot locker, I cleaned out most of its contents, save for the Enclave fatigues, and packed everything I could fit into my jacket. Until the only thing of interest left was the “danger” memory orb. 

Peering at the recollector sitting next to the terminal, the curious part of my brain had to wonder: What memory could be so valuable that he hid it all the way down here in the middle of nowhere at the bottom of a spooky cave? It was too tempting... I decided to go for it. 

“‘Danger’? What could be so dangerous about a memory orb?” I thought, slipping the magical device onto my head. The dark cavern around me then began to give way to the memory as it started to take hold. 

At first it was a very similar experience to the last time, except I was somewhere completely different. Suddenly there was snow, and I felt the cold rush of frigid air batting against my face and beneath my wings. I was flying through a sky watching a white wasteland far below. Only these skies were clear and I was in a pegasus body, that was flying in formation. The lead pegasus called out an order and the others followed. It was thrilling. More than it had any right to be for an earth pony.

Sadly, I had precious little time to enjoy this sensation, because I also began to feel a splitting pain in my frontal lobe. It grew more and more intense until the memory itself started to fracture all around me. Every thought became painful and distorted. Ahead of me I watched the same snowflake pass in front of my eyes several times, repeating rapidly. Behind me, the exact moment I had just watched myself observe moments before played out again as I watched myself watch it. Suddenly I was drowning in a sea of mental stimuli. It was too much and I blacked out unconscious.

Opening my eyes once more, I found myself staring at the cave ceiling again. I was an earth pony once more. “Ow, my head…,” I grunted. “That was one hell of a ride.” My vision was blurry, but things slowly began coming into focus. “So that’s what ‘danger’ means...” I had already taken one knock to  the head today. Scolding myself to not kill myself twice in one day, I’d have to remind myself to be a little less reckless from now on.

Something was off though. Through the single hole in the ceiling, I squinted and saw that the night sky looked somewhat lighter than before. I gasped, realizing it was nearing daylight. I had to get out of here soon! Debating to myself for a split second, I snatched up the danger orb and set myself to looking for the exit.

Trotting through the caverns, I found that thankfully they were a lot smaller and easier to navigate than before. Soon I came back to the central cavern again and up ahead I could see the entrance.

Relieved to almost be out of this place, I suddenly stopped, sensing a strange presence. I looked behind me and saw the deathly form of the pale white alicorn, standing motionless in the dark, but when I blinked it disappeared. The feeling going along with it. I wanted to believe my eyes were playing tricks on me again just like with the Whitetail Woods and scoffed. 

“Quit following me, whatever you are...,” I muttered, before leaving the cave behind for good.

Finally outside again, I inhaled deeply, feeling stronger than I did when I first entered. Breathing in the fresh air, it was good to be out of that cave. It was also just before dawn. “Good,” I thought. That would hopefully give me enough time to get back to Dodge City.

To my surprise Many Moons and Follows Crow were both there waiting for me at the entrance to the spirit cave as well. The shaman was holding my battle saddle and saddle bags in her hooves and gave me a warm smile. “You look different from the pony I met before. I can see it in the way you hold yourself, that you must’ve found what you were looking for in that cave.”

I nodded smiling back, but my smile faded. “I think I did, but I still have many questions. What about Lightning Dust? Who was she?”

A doomful look cast over the shaman’s face and she just shook her head. “I’m sure you do. Another time, perhaps we can have that conversation. In the meanwhile, you should be careful with whom you speak that name.”

“I’ll uh, keep that in mind...” I agreed, deciding to heed her grim warning. “Thanks.”

“There will be much turmoil in your future. Times ahead will be dark. Though for today, despite being born of the wasteland, you have stepped onto the path of the Dashite.”

“Dashite, huh? Don’t you need to be a pegasus for that? Or at least have been a part of the Enclave?”  I joked, cracking a small smile. I guessed it was supposed to be some kind of metaphor. “Just don’t start telling me: “Roulette, you are the chosen one. Blah, blah, blah, ancient evil, ooOooooOOooo”-type stuff, and I’ll take it.”

Many Moons chuckled to herself. “The spirits, they work in mysterious ways. I believe that they sent you to me so that I could help repay the favor Radar did for us long ago. And between the two of us, I have a strong feeling he would’ve been happy you found this place.”

I was at a loss for words. “Thank you, for everything you’ve done for me. I won’t forget it.”

“It was your own inner strength that allowed you to overcome the trials of the cave, but I suppose being an old buffalo spirit guide doesn’t hurt.” The old shaman chuckled. Then she extended her hooves with a grin, offering me my battle saddle and saddle bags along with her rifle which she was using for support. “Speaking of which, the spirits also told me you’d need this.” It was a brush gun that chambered forty-five seventy Ministry rounds. Adorned with red warpaint and a few crow feathers on the end of the barrel. “It’s my ‘Medicine Stick’. Useful for fighting off raiders and evil spirits... mostly the first one.”

Admiring the formidable rifle now affixed to my battle saddle, from the size alone it had to have one hell of a kick. It was perfect. “Thanks. I guess this is where we part ways then?” I asked. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to repay you.”

Resting my saddlebags over me, she smiled, “Think nothing of it, young dashite. I mixed a special brew for you in your saddlebag. Strong buffalo magic. Use only in an emergency. I have merely one request for you, if you will listen.”


I nodded to her.

“You may have noticed that many of our youth have left the village. We have been struggling with this loss of a generation in recent times. The call of civilization in recent times is strong. They care not for the old ways and their hearts are filled with anger. They follow Jagged Knife on the warpath, but in truth, they are simply misguided. Do not slay them if you can avoid it. If you can, please convince them to return.”

I could see the sun as it began to break over the horizon, and a warm ray of light shone across my face. Though I felt no reason to have to shield my eyes from it anymore. “I’ll see what I can do.” I promised.

“And also be careful who you tell about this place,” Follows Crow added, giving warning. “We would prefer to keep hidden from outsiders.” To which the spirit shaman gave him a light jab with her replacement walking stick. 

The bison turned and marched away in a huff, heading back towards the village.

“Do not blame Follows Crow,” she pleaded. “He lost both his parents long ago. That is why he stays so close to the tribe.”

Watching him trotting alone I thought to myself. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone,” I assured her. “Thanks for all your help, Chief Many Moons.  Now I have to go. There are others waiting for me.”

“No need for goodbyes. I believe we’ll meet again soon...” she smiled.

I nodded back. “Right.”

Looking ahead, I flexed my leg muscles and began stretching my limbs. My neck cracked side to side. I felt strong again. Maybe stronger than before in some ways.

Able to feel my healing factor now, albeit just barely, it was like there was something alive inside me. My wounds were almost there, but not completely healed yet. Plus I had a permanent scar now as a reminder. “No ‘get out of jail free’ cards this time,” I thought. Not ideal, but it would have to do. “Time for me to go kick Jagged Knife’s teeth in. I’ve got a score to settle with some raiders.”





Quest perk added: 
Way of the Buffalo - +1 Strength (another +1 while charging); special dialogue options.

Perk added:
Piercing Strike - Ignore 15 points of a target’s armor