"Doesn't it look like that painting is set askew?"
The guard leaned forward a bit, to get a better look at what the other was staring at. "Maybe? Maybe it's just perspective."
The other guard kept staring at the painting. "I think it is. Should we do something about it?"
"Like what?" asked his companion.
"I don't know. Fix it, I guess?"
The guard shook his head. "It's not our job. We shouldn't be worrying about it."
"But it looks wrong."
"I'm telling you, it's not our job. We shouldn't worry about it. Leave it to whoever is in charge of taking care of the paintings."
"Who is in charge of taking care of the paintings, anyway?" asked the guard.
"I don't know. Maybe the maids. Either way, someone is, and you should leave this to them," said the other.
"Look, I'm just trying to do a nice thing here."
"I get that. But you don't know what you're doing. Maybe it's not actually askew, it just looks like that to you. Maybe it's intentionally like that. It's someone else's work, you shouldn't go messing with it if you're not sure of what you're doing."
"No offense, but I think I know how a painting is supposed to go up on a wall. Whoever put it like that did a poor job, and I intend to fix that."
"How do you even know it's actually askew? It just looks like that to you. Maybe you're seeing it wrong. Maybe the floor here isn't level. You don't have the tools to check if it's actually right or not."
"Well, first off, this is Canterlot Castle we're talking about. You can't seriously be suggesting the floors aren't level here. I'm pretty sure someone would have noticed that in the single most important building in the entire country. And second, I am perfectly capable of seeing if a painting is askew or not. I'll remind you that I have much better aim than you do, so if anything you're probably the one seeing it wrong."
"Hey now, I agree with you that it looks like it's leaning to the left, but I'm just saying-"
"Wait, to the left? It looks like it's leaning to the right, not the left!"
"Our right or its right?"
"Our right! Why would you use stage directions for a painting on a wall? Of course I'm talking about our right."
"I'm just used to it."
"And that's why you're not in charge of directing military operations."
"Neither are you. And neither are there military operations to be in charge of, at most we'd be directing parades. Anyway. I'm not saying it doesn't look askew. I'm just saying you shouldn't touch it. You wouldn't want someone else doing your job without properly understanding it."
"My job right now is standing in front of this door, even a foal could understand it."
"Then maybe you should do your job and continue standing in front of this door instead of going there to move the painting."
Finally, one of the tremors was strong enough for the two to notice it past their bickering, as the walls and floor of the castle shook.
"Well, it's definitely askew now," one of the guards said, as the castle shook again and the painting fell.
"And maybe we should leave now," added the other, hearing cracks begin to form on the windows and outer wall.