//------------------------------// // Broken // Story: The Friendship Initiative // by Jatheus //------------------------------// Precipitation pelted Scootaloo as she struggled back to her hooves, her ear throbbing where she’d been bitten. She watched her ward run, disappearing into the darkness, and made no attempt to stop him. Her head was pounding as the last vestiges of her overindulgence combined with the excitement of the last few minutes to punish her a final time. She calmly wiped a little blood from her ear, but in truth she was relieved to not have lost it. Convinced he would not return in the short term, she returned her attention to everyone else. Arista was wailing into her mother’s embrace. The elder doe was on the stone floor, holding her child close. Soot Nosher stomped back into the house. He opened his mouth as if to speak, but then shut it, opting to make a low growl instead. He didn’t look at the pegasus. “Is she okay?” Scootaloo asked. Haltere nodded. Arista began to quiet herself and tried to speak, her voice cracking through great heaving sobs. “I... I just... wanted... to beg him... not to go!” “I know, sweetie, I know,” Haltere soothed the nymph. Scootaloo was trying to work out what had gone wrong. Ash Eater hadn’t given her any indication that he’d felt anything but affection for his sister. Everything had happened so quickly and with such volatility that it was almost a blur. Ash Eater had made that horrible comment about killing her friends on his way out, and she had stood. Her plate had skidded halfway across the table. By the time she had so much as turned, Arista was already almost to her brother, who twisted around and struck her. He had spun so fast that perhaps he hadn’t seen that it was Arista coming up behind him. What if he had heard the plate and assumed it was not a family member, but an insulted pegasus launching an attack? Scootaloo felt her stomach tighten. The harmless sparring that she had been doing with Ash Eater had likely just caused the pain of this situation. Princess Twilight Sparkle had been wise to urge caution. “Why... was Ashy... so mad... at me?” Arista let out another cry against her mother. “Hush now... it wasn’t your fault,” the older doe offered softly. Scootaloo took a deep breath, “It’s mine.” “Nonsense,” Soot Nosher spoke from the table before taking a drink of water. “We all saw what happened.” The pegasus shook her head, “No, I mean that for the entire time we have been together, Ash Eater and I have been sparring, sometimes without notice. I thought it was just a harmless thing we could do, the one thing we had in common. I’m pretty sure he thought it was me coming up behind him.” “Perhaps,” the stag said thoughtfully, “but that doesn’t excuse his behavior since the two of you arrived. We taught him better than that.” “What’s... what’s sparring?” Arista was beginning to calm down. “Fighting with an opponent,” her mother answered, “usually for practice or exercise.” Scootaloo felt rotten in spite of her body recovering to a more normal state. She indeed felt some blame in the way things had unfolded. However, it also meant that Ash Eater probably was equally upset with himself. She hadn’t missed the confusion in his eyes when she’d jumped in the way. Still, he had hurt her more than enough, and she was glad that their time together was almost over. That thought worked it’s way through her mind a little more slowly, and it dawned on Scootaloo that she really had no choice but to go find her ward. She felt herself sigh under the weight of loyalty to Twilight Sparkle. She went back to the table and shoveled up a few mouthfuls of hay and washed it down with her water. She was stopped as she headed to the door. “And where are you going?” Soot Nosher asked. “I have to find Ash Eater,” she sighed. “I’m not supposed to let him wander alone.” “You’ll bring him back?” Arista asked through the tears that filled her eyes. “Yes.” The nymph jumped up and ran to the pegasus, throwing her forelegs around her in an embrace. Scootaloo wasn’t sure what to do with that and decided to let it happen. “Come on little one,” Haltere said, “let’s get you cleaned up.” Soot Nosher sighed, “Have it your way. Let’s go.” “You’re coming with me?” Scootaloo was a little surprised. “It will be safer for all of us if you don’t go out by yourself.” Scootaloo felt something like a nervous smile flit across her face for a moment. For a second she had forgotten that it might be dangerous for her to move about Stone Hive on her own. “Besides,” Soot Nosher added, “I have a few ideas where he might end up.” The stag exited, and Scootaloo followed him out into the precipitous cavern. They stopped long enough to hang the curtain over the doorway again before heading off on their search. The pegasus had no enthusiasm whatsoever. She just wanted to be finished with her ward’s difficulties. ‘Just two more days, and then you can be done,’ she thought to herself. ‘Just hang on for two more days.’ ... Ash Eater wandered aimlessly for a time as the rain pelted him from above. He was hurting and didn’t know what to do. He didn’t mean to hit Arista; he would never have done that... but he had. The look on her face, the horror, the betrayal, the fear of him was a deeper wound to the stag than any he could remember. He shook his head. It was Scootaloo’s fault; it had to be. And yet... the pegasus had jumped in the way to defend the changeling nymph. It seemed she didn’t want any harm to befall Arista, but why? No answers were coming, and Ash Eater was beginning to get a headache from the strain. The cracked lip wasn’t helping. He hadn’t known the pegasus could hit that hard. He just wanted to forget about everything. Glad that the rain would mask his now spent tears, the stag set off in search of a tavern, which by chance was easy to find. The sign, painted out of luminous moss read, ‘Between’. Ash Eater might have smirked at that had he been in better spirits. The entrance was near one of the cavern walls where a great boulder sat. It was literally between the rock and a hard place. A small stream of condensation collected near there and fell like a tiny waterfall on one side of the opening. Ash Eater passed beside it to not get any more wet than he already was. A rudimentary roof kept most of the water out. It was far from perfect, but the few leaks that did get through were easy enough to avoid. There were at least two dozen changelings scattered about the space. A few sat alone, but most were in groups of twos or threes. The tavern was large enough that it could easily hold twice again as many if not more. Glad that he had remembered to carry a coin bag this time, Ash Eater sat down at the bar. A rather stout changeling with bright brown eyes nodded to him. “What’ll it be?” “Ouzo, and keep it coming,” Ash Eater laid some money down. The bartender nodded, “You do the same and you can have as much as you want.” Arista was still heavily on his mind in spite of the stag’s attempts to bury it for a while. The bartender delivered a small glass of spirits. The first drink stung sharply Ash Eater’s split lip. He growled reflexively. “Are you okay?” a doe’s voice asked. “Perfect,” he snorted. “That looks pretty bad.” He glanced over at the source of the words. It was an albino changeling with pink eyes. She wore genuine concern in her expression. He rolled his eyes at her. “I’ll live,” he answered. “I could take a look at it for you,” her voice became timid. “I’m just here for the liquor,” he sighed. “Besides, I’m not desperate enough to take help from the likes of you. “No need to be rude,” a second voice said. Ash Eater turned, but the speaker was walking around him to get onto his left side. He turned back the other way and found himself nose to nose with a blue pegasus. He instinctively hissed at her, but it sent a twinge of pain from his lip. “That has to hurt. Are you sure you don’t want us to patch you up?” she set her drink on the bar. “No, no, no! I don’t want help from that aberration, and by the hive I don’t want help from some anathema either!” “She’s a nurse,” the mare raised an eyebrow. “And I’m a doctor.” “Well, good for you, now buzz off,” he turned away from the newcomer. “Come now, that’s no way to make friends,” the pegasus continued in an almost playful tone. “Are you alright, Sky?” the albino nodded to her friend’s drink. “I’m okay,” she turned her attention back to the stag, “You don’t know me, but I love a challenge.” “I don’t care,” Ash Eater answered. He caught a glance of Sky, and there was an infuriatingly optimistic glint in her golden eyes. The stag sighed and took down the rest of his drink. The distraction did seem to take the edge off of his rage, but it didn’t do anything for the sadness he felt for hurting Arista. “Another drink for my friend here,” Sky said to the bartender. Ash Eater glared at her as the drink was delivered. “I don’t want anything from you!” he hissed, pouring the drink out on the floor. “How clumsy,” Sky smirked. “One more, please!” Ash Eater turned to face her, nearly coming off of his stool, “Stop... buying me drinks!” Contrary to his expectations, the pegasus didn’t push back or posture at him. Instead her smirk widened into a fiendish grin. “So, who hit you?” Ash Eater turned his back to the pegasus, “Go away.” “Come on, Sky, lets go dance,” the albino pleaded. She sounded as if she wanted to get out of the conversation. “Elytra, you are never going to get anywhere with a stag if you give up so easily,” the pegasus answered. Ash Eater was unamused at his apparent ability to attract such a strange group to himself. Seta had been bad enough, but at least she had been fun to look at. “But I’m not trying to get anywhere...” “You’re wasting your time, pony,” the stag interjected. “Oh, this?” Sky regarded herself. “No I’m a changeling. I just like being in this form for the feathers.” “Maybe I should slap you back into your natural shape then.” “Tough talk from a stag that is too afraid to say his own name.” As much as he didn’t want to be baited into a deeper conversation, “Ash Eater,” was off his tongue before he thought better of it. “Ash Eater,” the pegasus mused a second, “okay. So why are you ragging on my friend? She’s young, she’s cute.” “Sky, not again,” Elytra pleaded. Ash Eater wrinkled his nose in disgust, “Cute? She’s a genetic aberration.” “That’s one of her best features. Where are you going to find another one like her?” “I’m not a wagon for sale,” Elytra pouted. “Please, stop describing me.” “Elytra, I’m trying to help you out. Didn’t you say that scars were the most attractive feature a stag could have?” “Why don’t you just mercifully kill me before I die of embarrassment?” the pale changeling dropped her head onto the bar despondently. “You’re grazing in the wrong pasture, you stupid blue cow,” Ash Eater calmly volleyed. “What’s your problem?” “I already told you that I don’t want to be bothered! And if you think pushing a defective at me is going to put me in better spirits, then you’re even more stupid than you look!” Elytra’s face sprang back toward the others, “Don’t insult my friend!” Ash Eater didn’t think the doe would launch more than a verbal attack, but he was a bit surprised that she was so quick to defend a pony. He turned back to the insulted pegasus. There was fire in those golden eyes, but it seemed to rapidly work itself to a manageable level as she formed her glib reply, directed at Elytra, “I look stupid?” The albino waved a hoof dismissively. “As for you,” Sky redirected her attention, “I’m no expert, but I’ve been here long enough to pick up a few things. With a name like yours, that’s personal, no... family dishonor?” Ash Eater made a low growl, preparing to pounce on the pony. “I’d think you’d take what you can get.” Elytra shot back, “Wow, Sky. Way to make me feel even worse.” “No, I just meant that... Okay that came out wrong. My point is that considering you didn’t do anything to earn your dishonor any more than Elytra did to be an albino, I’d expect you to be more enlightened and less discriminating.” “Broken eggs, go away!” “Okay, I’ll go, but only because my friend wants to dance and I’m tired of talking to you. If that lip starts to bother you, come by the dispensary.” It was a relief to be left alone as the stag took down another drink. A low fire boiled within, but his head began to feel lighter. The unfortunate side effect of the odd pair leaving was that Ash Eater was left with his thoughts. The brief distraction had not been nearly enough to alter his spirits in any way. Everything he’d been through since he had been assigned to work undercover with the ponies was rushing back through his mind, even as the last few moments at dinner were burned into recent memory so well he could still see the look on Arista’s face. Fighting back his own tears, Ash Eater asked for another drink. ... Scootaloo had spent the late afternoon exploring some of the more remote places in Stone Hive. The initial thought had been that somewhere secluded would be the place to look for Ash Eater. Eventually, Soot Nosher altered his tactics and went to searching taverns. Having scarcely spoken more than a sentence or two between them, Scootaloo got the general impression that Soot Nosher didn’t like her. This wasn’t a surprise so much as a tactical concern. The pegasus took extra care to not become disoriented in the labyrinth-like cavern and keep in mind which direction led back to the surface. As certain as she felt that she was just being paranoid, it seemed prudent considering the situation. As they approached the next tavern, having searched two already, Scootaloo’s ear throbbed. It was more of a bother than actually painful. They followed the music, some synth-techno style that had a strong beat that was perfect for dancing, into ‘Between’. Scootaloo found the name odd until she realized that they were against the cavern wall and passing a giant boulder. Then she felt herself groan at the pun. The establishment was filled with changelings, as had been the previous two. What struck her as different was their lack of response to her arrival. At the first two taverns, everything had nearly stopped when the pegasus entered, and she had been eyed suspiciously until she left. Here, there were glances that came her way, but the changelings didn’t really seem bothered by her presence. As the song ended, she realized why. There were groups of ponies scattered about the establishment. Most of them wore hard hats or other garb that suggested they were builders of one kind or another. That may have been the answer to the indoor plumbing mystery that Scootaloo had pondered previously. As the music changed, several changeling couples left the dance floor. One pair was composed of an albino changeling and a blue pegasus. Scootaloo was a little amazed to see them out having fun. It only confirmed her previous observation that they were good friends. Considering the possibility of saving time, she made her way to their table to ask them if they had seen Ash Eater. “Hey again,” Scootaloo addressed the pair as Soot Nosher found space to stand beside her, “we are looking for my ward.” Elytra looked up and her eyes went wide, “Queen’s Crown! What happened to your ear?” The albino leapt from her seat to get a closer look. Skyberry approached more calmly to do the same. “It’s nothing.” “Yeah, it looks worse than it is,” Skyberry agreed. “I really need to find my ward. He has a broken horn, missing hind leg. I think his lip is split too. Have you seen him?” Skyberry’s expression changed to one of amusement just before she laughed, “You mean that stag over at the bar?” “Thank you so much!” Scootaloo said as she pushed past the two and through the crowd, followed closely by Soot Nosher. “You need to get that ear looked at!” Elytra called after her. Scootaloo wasn’t certain what she would say as she made her way though the crowd, but she would try to avoid any further unpleasantness. As she closed the distance, she could just make out his mumbling. “...ouht of mhoney. Rhotten heggsh, I cahn’t belhieve I rhan ouht of mohney...” Ash Eater was slumped over the bar, laying his head by an empty shot glass. Scootaloo was about to address him when she felt a hoof on her shoulder. Soot Nosher shook his head before stepping forward. He quietly sat down beside his son where he could be seen. Ash Eater repeated his lament once more before he recognized his father. Scootaloo kept her distance and watched. Ash Eater stared up blankly for a long moment. “I rhan out of monhey... thaht bhlue pegashush dihdn’t bhuy enhough drhinksh fhor mhe...” Scootaloo glanced back at Skyberry and Elytra, but the pair was no longer paying her any mind. The blue pegasus was laughing at something that brought a much more dainty giggle from her albino friend. The mare turned her attention back to the bar and her inebriated ward. “Ahnd I cahn’t ghet ahway frhom shtuphid pohniesh, no mhatter where I gho...” “I know, son.” Ash Eater drunkenly picked up his head, “Whhy?” Soot Nosher took a deep breath, “Our queen wills it so.” “Mhay shhe rheign forhevher...” “May she reign forever.” Ash Eater had obviously been crying, apparently wallowing in despair. After everything they’d been through, it wasn’t enough to make Scootaloo feel sorry for him. “I... dhidn’t mhean to hurt Ahrishtah...” “I know it; we all do. That’s why we came to bring you home.” “Hohme... I dhon’t have a hohme... I lihve whith a shtuphid pehgashush...” Scootaloo instinctively wanted to defend herself, to push back, but Soot Nosher shot her a disarming look, almost a pleading that she not. The mare took a breath and remembered that she only had two more days to put up with the stag. “Arista and your mother are worried about you.” Ash Eater stared blankly ahead for a long moment. Scootaloo was beginning to wonder whether he had heard that last statement when the stag suddenly stood up and immediately fell to the ground. With a nod from Soot Nosher, the pair helped lift the fallen stag back to his hooves. It was a rather wobbly endeavor to get him to walk, but with the other two keeping against either side, the trio managed to amble to the exit and make their way home. ... The path back to the house was a difficult one to walk for Ash Eater. The road simply wouldn’t stand still beneath his hooves, and that made for a stumbling and arduous walk. He was glad his father had found him, but far more glad to get tucked into a soft mossy alcove to sleep off the alcohol. Dreams took him soon enough. Through them, the stag’s mind journeyed through flights of fancy and nonsensical impossibilities for an unknowable time. Eventually, the fates chose a setting. Nitro walked through the brambles with his squad, searching for the mirror pool. He knew that he was leading them into a trap, and he was all set. With one member already missing and himself a spy, they would be instantly down by one-third of their strength once he incapacitated Nimba. With any luck, they would surrender, and his people would capture a princess. He would go home a hero and end his family dishonor, and they would be in a better position to overthrow the ponies once and for all. As they came into a clearing, the air became electrified with tension. He turned back to Nimba as the others advanced. She smiled at him; deep bags were under her eyes from the leeching spell he’d had her under for several weeks. He cast the final phase of it, bringing the mare, whose brother he had been impersonating, into a trance. Timberwolves crashed through the foliage and shouting went up as crossbows were loosed. He turned to work a teleportation spell on the princess. As he charged it up, she alerted the rest that he was a changeling. His cover was blown. No sooner had he finished casting than the big one had thrown him down and was stomping on him. Nitro couldn’t see anything as he transformed back into his true form. Ash Eater stood as hot bolts of changeling magic impacted into his assailant. As he turned to run, Ash Eater’s eyes fell where Nimba stood entranced. Lethal bolts of energy began pouring through her body. But then she transformed, engulfed for a moment in green magical fire, and then Ash Eater saw Arista. Everything fell away except the terror in her eyes as the life left them and she collapsed to the forest floor. He charged to the limp form and tried to wake her up. Blood flowed from a dozen wounds. Ash Eater screamed in horror. ... Scootaloo had trouble sleeping, in large part for having been passed out for much of the day. Equally, she felt uncomfortable in her surroundings. Everything seemed foreign to her in this place, with the exception of the lavatory. She was glad that the residents of Stone Hive had adopted that convenience. A rustling caught her attention, making Scootaloo suspect Ash Eater had awakened. Feeling that preparation would be prudent ahead of their next encounter, the mare eased her way out of the little sleeping alcove and stretched a little. No one else was up. She followed the sound to Ash Eater’s alcove. He seemed to still be sleeping, his back to her. She was just about to return to bed when he convulsed, thrashing about and letting out gasps as though he couldn’t get air. Scootaloo tensed, uncertain whether he had detected her presence and would launch an attack. He rolled over, and his eyes betrayed disorientation initially. They quickly went wide with fear. “Arista,” he croaked. “Arista!” The stag burst into tears, shocking the pegasus into taking a step backward. She didn’t know what to do. This horrible individual, the one that had been ruthless and hunted her friends... the same vile creature that had intended to kill everypony that got in his way to take over Equestria... the very embodiment of evil that had taken pleasure in torturing and killing ponies... he was weeping like a filly. Time froze. What could she do? Ash Eater seemed truly vulnerable for the first time. All the armor he had made of venom and hate was stripped away, perhaps for the first time in his life. His eyes were asking, pleading for help. What should she do? Thoughts raced through Scootaloo’s mind of all the wretched things this stag had done. He didn’t deserve compassion or forgiveness for any of it, certainly not comfort from one who had so often been on the receiving end. What would she do? Scootaloo remembered Sparklefly, her friend who refused to hold animosity against even this terrible changeling. She had said that you can only forgive those who have wronged you, and in that sense, nobody really deserves it. If for no other reason than to honor the memory of her friend, Scootaloo made a decision to act before she could talk herself out of it. The pegasus dove head-first into the alcove and embraced the changeling. She half-expected to be attacked or pushed away, but much to her surprise, he reached out, grabbed around her and held on, crying into her shoulder. Realizing that she didn’t have a plan beyond this point, Scootaloo just stayed still and held him for a time. He wept. He cried. He left out muffled screams into her shoulder. She didn’t know what else to do, but she was certainly committed at this point. She only held on tighter, a gesture he returned. Eventually, his grip loosened; his tears abated. Ash Eater regained control of his breath and backed away, looking Scootaloo in the eyes. “Why?” the stag asked. “After everything I’ve done to you... why have you been so nice to me?” “I...” Scootaloo hesitated, trying time work it out for herself. “I don’t know.” He stared at her expectantly, as if waiting for a better answer. In the near total darkness, Scootaloo could just make out the tears on his face. She tried again, “I guess... Because I know where you are. I've been there. You feel like a monster, and you're not even sure how you became that way.” The light of recognition filled his eyes; he seemed to hang on every word she spoke. “And I didn't get out by myself. I had help,” she continued. “If nobody had been there for me, I don't know how I would have ended up.” She mused to herself a moment before adding, “Crazy as it may seem, right now... I'm the one that's here for you.” Silence returned to the alcove for a while as Ash Eater stared into her eyes. There was no trace of the hostility or hatred that had always been there. He seemed hurt, broken. The stag took a deep breath. “I've spent so much time telling myself that none of it mattered, that ponies were inferior, no more to be mourned than cutting a blade of grass. But the truth is, I did feel it. I felt sad for all of them... every single one that I hurt.” Scootaloo was surprised by the confession. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she couldn’t believe that this was happening. Surely it was a ruse, some trick to put her off guard. “I still do,” he added as fresh tears escaped. “I have come to realize that every pony has the same hopes and fears that we all do... They have families that love them... just like me... When we have that much in common...” He took a breath, “I... I liked Nimba... I’m sorry I got her killed.” More tears came, and Scootaloo chose to believe him, pulling the stag close again, patting his back this time. “I’m sorry I hurt your friends,” he croaked. “I’m sorry I killed them. I... I’m...” Ash Eater grew silent and his breath caught. Scootaloo wasn’t sure if she should say something, do something... She chose to wait for him to finish. “Scootaloo... I’m...” he took another deep breath, “I’m sorry I hurt you.” She felt his tears trickling onto her neck, flowing freely. Surely this was a dream; it had to be. Scootaloo knew she needed to say something. She had been so stunned to this point that she had failed to consider this outcome as a real possibility. She didn’t know whether she would ever feel no anger over the things that Ash Eater had done to her before, but she knew she could continue on and not bring it up again. She’d been doing that for almost a year, living with the very stag that inflicted so much heartache upon her and many others. “Forget it,” she finally replied. “When I told you I forgave you, that day on the battlefield, I meant it. I can’t forget the things that were done, but I’m not holding you accountable whether you deserve it or not.” He gently pushed her away, his blue eyes finding hers. It seemed that he needed to see her expression to make sure that the pegasus was being genuine with him. “I mean it,” she reiterated. “We’ve spent more than enough time at each other’s throats. I’m ready to move on if you are.” “Yeah...” he sighed with relief, as if a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders. Scootaloo made a wry grin, “But don’t you think for one second that this means no more sparring.” Ash Eater looked confused. “No way am I giving up the chance to take you down a notch when you need it.” The stag suppressed a laugh. Scootaloo could scarcely believe it. Surprising though it was, the levity seemed well timed. Ash Eater nodded, but otherwise made no reply. He also didn’t let go of the mare. Awkward as that was, she decided to at least stay until he got back to sleep. As silence dominated the house again, Scootaloo realized that she had a decision to make. If this penance from Ash Eater was real, then it could change everything about their situation. As exciting as that was, Scootaloo still had her doubts. It was hardly even two full days before she was supposed to leave him with Princess Twilight Sparkle and be done with this. How could she abandon him with real hope just ahead? The promise of change was too much to ignore. It wouldn’t be an instant fix for anyone, and Scootaloo had no doubt that this was only the first of many steps that Ash Eater would have to take. She also knew that for the foreseeable future; he wouldn’t be taking them alone.