Welcome to P-Oni-Ville

by gundamexia34

Ch 1

Alex and Fluttershy made their way out of the woods, the former occasionally trying to start a conversation, only to get a mumbled and shy response. Therefore, the trip was spent mostly in silence until they reached Fluttershy's hut. As soon as they approached, the girl was swarmed with small animals that started to crawl all over her.

"O...Oh my! Hello! I'm okay! I'm sorry, but I had to go and help him!" She said fervently.

Jay walked in on them carrying a gigantic leaf with 4 large fish wrapped in it, “So, what’d I miss?”

"Not much, just her little friends being worried." Alex smiled as he jerked a thumb toward the fuzz pile that used to be Fluttershy before she was knocked over and swarmed.

Moving in closer to Alex’s ear he whispers, “You hungry? Because I just found out we can eat raw fish with no problem.”

"Hmmm, maybe I could put those lessons my uncle gave on grilling to use." Alex muttered, his mouth smoking as he recalled his fire breath. He had long since realized that he was the Oni from his character sheet.

“Dude your mouth is smoking.” Jay points out.

"Fire breath." Alex deadpans, taking a fish and blowing a small, but steady stream of flames to cook it just a little above being raw.

Jay watches before pulling out his sword, stabbing another fish then lighting his hand on fire to make the perfect spit roaster.

As the two ate, Fluttershy noticed but didn't comment. She knew some predatory animals that sometimes came to her when injured, and a few liked their meat cooked for some reason.

Jay looks up from his meal at Fluttershy who seems to be waiting on them to finish, “You want some?” He moves the fish a bit closer to her.

"Oh, no. I can't eat meat. Ponies like me are herbivores." She said quickly.

"Ponies?" Alex asked, a feeling of dread washing over him as he turned to Jay, "Oh God, please for the love of all that is good and holy don't tell me…"

Without skipping a beat Jay breaks out into laughter after he realized where they were, “Yo, I’m dead!”

Alex just facepalmed, "How the hell do we end up in messes like this? It's almost as bad as the time in Louisiana…"

“Hey, we agreed to never speak about that! Ever!”

"Oh, can it, it wasn't that bad. So you forgot to check 'under the hood', so what?"

“Oh, shut it, that was the most traumatizing thing I have never expected.”

"Seriously, at least you weren't the bottom!"

“You right.” He sighed, going back to eating.

All the while, Fluttershy watched with a tilted head and eyes wide with confusion. Alex looked up, and found that this was the last straw.

"Dammit." He sighed before walking over and picking her up in a hug, "YOU ARE TOO CUTE!" He all but squealed.

Jay could only watch with wide eyes behind his mask.

Fluttershy turned red all over as she started stuttering denials. Alex just kept cuddling her for a few moments before it registered that he was doing this and he put her down.

"S...Sorry about that. I couldn't help myself." He said, his cheeks more than a little red.

“Pervert.” Jay said, slowly backing into the woods.

"I am not! Come back here, you little bastard!" Alex yelled at him and charged with a fist raised.

“Ah! Nigga vanish!” He yelled, throwing a smoke bomb at his feet, and disappearing.

Alex slammed a fist into where he used to be, leaving a small crater a little bigger than his hand, "Why you...Get over here and take your beating like a man!"

“Where Oni, dumbass.” He yelled before running away through the treetops.

Alex stood there for a minute with sparks coming from his mouth with every panting breath as he calmed down. He then turned to Fluttershy apologetically.

"Sorry about that. He's like the brother I never had, but it also means we fight like brothers." He explained sheepishly.

“Aww, I didn’t know you cared that much.” Jay said swinging from a tree branch.

Alex scoffed, "Of course I care, dumbass! Why would I save your sorry behind whenever you get into a fight you can't handle otherwise?"

“That was only one time when I got my ass beat. One time!”

"Which one? The time you took on the Greenhorns, the time you fought the Stalkers, the time you…"

“I get it, already, now go back to being a pervert or something.”

Alex growled and shot off a bolt of lightning at his friend. A weak one meant to knock him onto the ground and stun him for a bit.

Jay falls to the ground spazzing like he just got tased.

Alex walks over and slings him onto his shoulder, then turns to Fluttershy as he sees the sun setting.

"He'll be fine, can we stay with you for the night?" He asked hesitantly.

"Of course." She said with an adorable smile.

When Alex woke up, he noticed that Jay was gone from the spot on the floor he set him down at the previous night, and in his place was a note.

Dear Oni brother, I am happy to say that you get to learn about MLP while I get to find more 'dogs' and probably make an army or just a hut. PS, I will be back when episode 1 starts as I want to explore. Signed, Jay.

Alex stared for a moment before he started to quietly swear up a storm to avoid waking Fluttershy and then burned the note to ashes with his fire breath. No need to tell her or any other ponies about the whole 'other dimension where you're a tv show' thing.

"Honestly, that idiot is always talking about the characters. I knew her name sounded relatively familiar!" He muttered, then went into the kitchen to see what he could make.

A paper dove flew through an open window, smacking Alex in the face before unfurling into a letter.

PPS I did magic ninja shit, you should too

Another bird flew through the window landing on the piece of paper and unfolding.

PPPS I mean the magic part, the ninja shit is my thing.

"...You little…" Alex said, a fondly exasperated expression on his face as he torched those notes as well.

At that moment, Fluttershy came down the stairs.

"Oh! Um...Hi." She said timidly, "I...Uh...Noticed your friend is missing, where did he go?"

"He took off into the woods. Knowing him, he plans on just hanging out in there for a bit." Alex said vaguely, then noticed Fluttershy looking a bit down, "It's nothing you did, he probably just wants to adjust for a bit."

"Oh. Alright." She looked out the window for a moment, and her eyes widened. Alex turned, but there was nothing there, "Sorry, I thought I saw a bird out there or something."

"Oh, no problem. So, you got anything to eat for breakfast?"

"Umm, not really." Fluttershy brightened, "But there's a really good bakery in town, we could go there."

"Sounds like a plan." Alex said, smiling.

Soon enough, the duo was standing outside what looked like a giant gingerbread house.

"Umm, are you sure they're open? The lights are off." Alex pointed out, noticing the blackened windows.

"It...It's fine. Come on!" Fluttershy grabbed Alex's hand and dragged him forward, despite him being twice her size.

She opened the door and shoved him inside, then shut it behind her.

There was silence for a moment, and then…

"Surpr-AIEEEEE! MONSTER!" All of the gathered ponies screamed when they saw Alex.

“Hey, that's offensive.” Jay said from the back with his mask on top of his head, eating a slice of cake.

The ponies turned and screamed even louder, panicking and running about chaotically until an airhorn caught everyone's attention.

"Hey! Everyone relax!" A pink pony with slightly darker pink hair and light blue eyes called as she lowered the arm with the airhorn, "These are the guys I wanted to welcome!"

“Ya, and this cake tastes delicious.” Jay said with a mouthful of cake.

"Oh, thank you!" The pink pony said before literally bouncing over to Alex, "I'm Pinkie Pie! The local party pony!"

"Name's Alex, and the glutton back there is Jay." Alex said with a shake of his head and a smile.

"Hey-o!” Jay yelled out.

The other ponies blinked, seemingly trying to process this, before they all exchanged looks and went to calmly participate in the party.

A few weeks later, the two Oni could be seen walking around town. Or rather, Alex could be seen doing so. Jay, as his note said, tended to stay in the woods, save for the occasional stop by Sugar Cube Corner for a treat. Alex had found his calling in helping the Apples collect from their orchard. He traded his labor for the ability to stay in their barn.

That day, Alex was walking about, getting groceries for Granny Smith while the others collected apples. He noticed the royal carriage approaching town, and had to blink and check the date on a nearby newspaper.

"Huh, almost time for the Summer Sun Celebration already?" He muttered, "Either the princess is early, or someone's coming to make sure things are set up."

“Finally episode 1 is starting, I was getting bored making improvements to my hut every few hours.” Jay says sucking on a popsicle while walking next to Alex with his mask on his hip. “You should have been practicing your fast questioning skills.”

"Gah!" Alex yelped, jumping to the left, "How many times do I have to tell you not to do that!? And what do you mean?"

“Oops, I said too much.” Jay laughs keeping pace with Alex.

"Whatever." Alex replied, rolling his eyes, then approaching the now descending carriage.

As soon as the door opened and he saw the pony who exited it, he knew they likely would never get along. The way she held herself was even stiffer than Rarity!

“Shit, I got to bounce, I’m helping Pinky taste test different cakes and stuff, bye!” Jay said walking away normally instead of vanishing.

"Hoo boy. Here we go." Alex said under his breath as he approached the pony, trying to give her the benefit of the doubt.

As soon as he heard her nonstop questions, he scowled and walked away.

"Well, here we go. Finally meeting this Princess Celestia everyone goes on about." Alex muttered, watching the stage along with the rest of the town.

“Yep, definitely going to meet a Princess.” Jay said, trying to hold back his laughter by covering his mouth.

"I hope she's nothing like her student." Alex scowled as he remembered his encounters with Twilight Sparkle.

Jay stifled his laugh as he unclips his mask from his belt and puts it on, pulling his swords from resting behind him to right next to him and tying his sheath and handle together. “I hope she doesn’t attack first before her monologue.”

"Dude, what the hell? She's just here to give a speech there's no…" Alex was cut off by a maniacal cackle.

A dark-colored pony with flowing star-covered hair and light blue slitted eyes appeared. Alex blinked and his brain stalled as he tried to figure out how the hell he missed the presence of a malevolent demon in town, vaguely noticing Jay mockingly repeating everything the mare said.

"...And the night shall last...FOREVER!" She yelled with another cackle as she turned to walk off-stage.

“I’d hit that.” Jay yells over everyone screaming to Alex.

Nightmare Moon stiffened and turned with a glare, only for her eyes to widen at the sight of the Oni.

"Oh, fuck." She said quietly before turning into mist and vanishing.

“Did you see the ass on her?” Jay elbow Alex in the arm winking.

Alex sighed, giving Jay a dope slap.