Crimson Sunset
By Nebula Star
Chapter 8: Remorse
***
Canterlot had changed. At least for Sunset it had. She’d awakened in a room in the castle, one she didn’t recognize, and she didn’t dare leave. Not that she thought she’d be in trouble if she did, but because she was terrified of being around other ponies, of losing control. Oh, she was sated for now, but she still didn’t want to risk it. Because of that, the sight of Canterlot spread out below no longer offered her the comfort it once had. Instead it was a reminder of what she’d lost. What she’d thrown away. But at the same time, it was a sight she wasn’t sure she’d see again for some time; so she sat there, staring out at the world she could never be a part of again.
The click of the door latch made her look over even as it opened and a figure she hadn’t expected stepped inside.
“Ah, so you are awake.” Princess Luna said as she stepped inside, levitating several rolls of paper as well as a tray bearing some breakfast pastries and a pitcher of orange juice. “We weren’t sure how long you would sleep.”
“Where’s Princess Celestia?” Sunset asked, worried.
Luna smiled reassuringly. “Resting. Sister did not get much sleep these past few days. She was worried about you.”
Sunset looked down. “I see.”
“Do not worry; sister will be just fine when she wakes. She just needs to catch up on her sleep.” Luna told her and levitated over a small decorative table to set the breakfast tray on. “Unfortunately we… I am not the cook my sister is, so we will have to make due with the castle baker’s pastries.
Sunset gave a weak smile. “The royal baker’s pastries? What horrible torture.” She said sarcastically. But the smile was short lived and quickly faded as she turned back to the window. “Thank you.”
The thanks was sincere, but lacked much enthusiasm.
Luna gave her an understanding look as she closed the door. “I was hoping to speak with you about a couple matters while we break our fast if you don’t mind.”
“About what?”
“This, first of all.” Luna said levitating over the rolls of paper and laying them out before her. Sunset recognized them immediately, of course. It was after all, her own work. She sighed heavily seeing the original drawings and notes concerning her spell laid out in front of her.
“What did I do wrong?”
“Nothing,” Luna said and Sunset looked up at her sharply in disbelief. “The fault does not lie in your spell, Sunset. Your work is flawless.”
“But then what… what caused this!?” She ruffled her large bat-like wings for emphasis.
“That is the fault of the magic you used to power it.” Luna told her, sitting down by her side.
Sunset frowned, not understanding. “Why would that matter? I know the technique I used is considered dark magic but it’s just energy; why would it matter where it came from?”
Luna sighed. “I am afraid this is a matter sister neglected to teach you. Tell me, Sunset, after seeing how much power dark magic techniques can provide, did you ever wonder why there have not been more instances of ponies using dark magic? Surely you know that the laws alone would not dissuade some?”
She thought back. It hadn’t really ever crossed her mind, but considering how much power could be gained it was kind of odd that there hadn’t been more incidents involving dark magic through the years. “I guess I never really thought about it.”
“The reason is simple. Dark magic, or magic forcibly taken from another creature, simply isn’t safe to use. You see, no matter the technique, taking magic from another will always be painful for them, and that pain inevitably causes negative emotions; anger, resentment and such. These emotions taint the magic. And that taint, causes the magic to seek to punish the wielder and any who would benefit from its power.”
“I see…” Sunset said softly. “So this is all dark magic’s punishment for me?” She said gesturing vaguely to her body.
Luna nodded. “I am afraid so,” she sighed heavily. “Dark magic’s punishments are exceedingly cruel. I wanted nothing more than to be beloved and respected as my sister was, and so in punishment it gave me a form that would inspire only fear.”
Sunset looked over at her in surprise.
“Indeed, my transformation into Nightmare Moon was not of my own design,” she confirmed. “My spell was meant only to increase my power, not to alter my form. That was dark magic’s punishment for me.
“And you, from what sister hath told me, it sounds to me as if you desired nothing more than to prove your own worth. To show that you are more than just Celestia’s student. And so in punishment, you have been given a form that cannot even survive without feeding off of others.”
She looked down at her work for a moment in silence. Luna was right, she had wanted to prove herself; to prove her worth; more than anything. But in her eagerness, she had instead brought about her own downfall. “It turned me into a leach.”
In silence Luna stretched a wing around Sunset. “As I said, dark magic’s punishments are exceedingly cruel.”
They sat for a few moments in silence, Sunset gladly accepting the comfort and understanding the young princess offered. “Then there was nothing wrong with the spell?” She asked at last.
Luna shook her head. “No, I am certain that this spell would work. Unfortunately, I do not know of any way a pony could safely power it,” she sighed. “Tis truly a pity too… to be so close to being able to grant our subjects the very gift we have wished to give them since we first took the crown and yet still unable.”
“It would change the world.” Sunset said softly.
“Indeed.” She rolled up the pages again and set them aside. “Perhaps one day we will find a way to power your spell. Until then, I believe it would be best if we keep this locked away. There are those who would think dark magic’s ire worth the risk for what your spell promises.”
“Probably for the best.” Sunset agreed.
“But should we ever find a way to safely power the spell, I assure you, the world will know who is responsible for such a magnificent gift.” Luna assured her. “And you shall be there to see it come to pass.”
“Maybe…” Sunset said softly.
Luna looked at her curiously. “I trust you did examine thyself after your transformation? Did you not sense that your magic is indeed alicorn magic now? You are immortal now just as sister or I am.”
“I did sense that…” She looked up suddenly realization in her eyes as she looked over at Luna. “Dark magic changed you into Nightmare Moon!?”
“Yes…” Luna answered hesitantly, wondering why she’d turned the conversation back to that.
“But the Elements of Harmony changed you back! If they changed you back, then couldn’t they be used to change me back as well!?”
Sadly Luna shook her head. “I do not believe so.”
Sunset looked over at her confused. “Why not? If they changed you back…”
“Changing me back was a side effect of what the elements did to cure me of the darkness that had consumed my heart.”
Sunset looked at her, confused. “A side effect?”
Luna nodded. “How old do I appear to you, Sunset?”
She frowned, not understanding what that had to do with anything. “Well… I know you’re over a thousand years old…”
“Physically, how old do I appear to be?”
Sunset looked her over briefly. Size wise, she was nearly as tall as the average adult mare, but Sunset guessed that was partially due to her being an alicorn. If she took into consideration her slim frame and youthful features, they, along with her baby blue mane gave her an appearance of a young mare in her early to mid teens. “I guess… about fourteen? Fifteen?”
Luna smiled, glad that Sunset wasn’t lying for fear of insulting her. “You are not far off. Physically, I’m about sixteen now. But before my banishment I was well into my second century.”
Sunset tilted her head curiously. “But then why are you so young now?”
“It is how the elements of harmony healed me of the darkness in my heart. To put it simply, the elements reverted me back to the age I was when that darkness first began to take hold. I still remember everything that happened, of course, but those memories are… distant, disconnected; almost as if they belonged to someone else.” She sighed. “I think the elements did that so that I could look back at my actions clearly and more objectively without the distortion of the pain associated with those memories.”
“But how does that make changing you back from Nightmare Moon a side effect?” Sunset asked.
“You know how the elements work? Do you not? How they seek to bring harmony in all things? To cleanse the darkness from my heart, the elements reverted me to a younger age; changing everything back, including the physical changes dark magic had wrought upon me. But it was not those physical changes the elements were targeting.” Luna looked up at Sunset, eyes full of sympathy. “You said that you have examined your body?”
Sunset nodded.
“And did you find anything that seemed wrong or broken? Anything out of harmony?”
Thinking back, she reluctantly shook her head.
“Sister asked me to do a thorough examination of you when we first brought you back. I can confirm, that there is nothing wrong with your body. Your need for blood is simply how your body works. As far as the elements of harmony are concerned, your body is in perfect harmony. And I fear that in your case, the elements would not do what they did for me because while you have struggled with anger and bitterness; I do not thing that they have truly taken hold of your heart.” Luna reached out a hoof and placed it gently on Sunset’s should. “It is a cruel irony that the reason I do not think the elements would work, is because you are a better mare than I.”
Sunset gave a hesitant smile at the compliment, though her disappointment still showed.
Luna smiled in return and shrugged. “But, perhaps I am wrong; if you wish, we can still send for the bearers to make an attempt.”
For a moment Sunset was tempted, but deep down she knew Luna was right. She’d performed several scans on her body since the transformation and she knew there was nothing technically wrong. She sighed and shook her head. “No, I trust your judgement on this princess.”
“Truly, I wish I were wrong, but I do not believe that I am.”
Silence fell between them for a few moments as Sunset turned and looked out the window once more.
“Well let us not let our breakfast go stale.” Luna said levitating the table with the tray closer to the two of them.
Sunset glanced at the tray and decided she might as well. She’d been living off of a small stash of supplies she’d been able to steal when she’d gone for quills and paper. That and of course the blood she’d stolen every third night… Looking over the selection, she selected one with a caramelized glaze and chopped pecans. “If we found a way to safely power my spell; do you think casting it again would change me into a true alicorn?”
“Perhaps with some modifications.” Luna said with a nod, selecting a pastry for herself.
Sunset looked at her as a thought occurred to her. “Could the elements of harmony be used to power my spell?”
“Nay. Not that they do not have the power. The bearers don’t truly wield the power of the elements, rather they direct it, focus it toward a target. It is the elements themselves that then decide what is to be done.”
Sunset nodded understanding and took a bite of her pastry. It was every bit as delicious as she’d expect from the royal baker. For a time, the two ate in silence, enjoying the meal.
“It is actually quite annoying being so young again.” Luna said conversationally. “Even being a princess, I still struggle to get ponies to take me seriously.”
Sunset glanced at her. “I guess I can see that.”
“Just last week in fact I had a foreign dignitary make a pass at me as if he thought me an inexperienced filly.”
“Seeking to further relations with Equestria?” Sunset asked.
“Most likely.” Luna rolled her eyes. “Or at least to enhance his own standing.”
Sunset gave a small smile and selected a second pastry; this one filled with cream cheese. The rest of the meal was finished in relative silence before Luna again spoke up. “There was one other matter I wanted to speak with you about.”
Sunset looked at her and raised a brow.
“I trust you know of blood magic?”
Sunset nodded.
“It is of course one of the most foul forms of dark magic. Spilling another pony’s blood to gain access to greater magical power… most forms of blood magic involve killing the victims; but not all. As every drop of our blood carries magic within it, there are a few forms of blood magic that involve only spilling a portion of the victim’s blood. Still a foul thing to do, but at least the victim is left alive. In any case, what I am getting at, is that the blood you drink may in fact carry a great deal of magical power.”
“It does…” Sunset said softly.
Luna looked at her surprised. “You have felt it?”
She nodded. “This morning when I woke, I could feel a vast pool of foreign magic within me. It’s been fading, but there’s still a lot left. I guess I didn’t notice before because the first few times they were just regular ponies… but last night, it was Princess Celestia’s blood I drank.”
“Yes…” Luna said hesitantly. “I wanted to warn you against using that magic, except as a very last resort. And even then, you must never try to use that magic in any way that would be beneficial.”
“Because of dark magic’s punishments?”
“Indeed. Such magic can only be used offensively and even then, you must be very careful not to leave an opening for it to lash out at you.”
“Alright. I wasn’t planning on trying to use it anyway.”
“It would be for the best that you do not.” Luna agreed.
Sunset nodded and gazed out the window again for a time. Luna, having made sure she had plenty of time this morning, was content to relax and keep her company. It was a lovely view of the city though she truly thought the city was even more impressive at night.
“What’s going to happen to me now?” Sunset asked, being the one to break the silence this time.
Luna sighed. “That is yet to be decided. I will not lie to you, Sunset; while we will not hold you accountable for the attacks when you were not in control of yourself; there is still the matter of the events leading up to your transformation. You attacked numerous students using dark magic, most of whom were completely innocent of any transgression against you. And we cannot ignore the attacks on the arch-mages; I understand Runic Passage will likely never recover more than half of his former power.”
Sunset lowered her head in shame.
“These are serious crimes and there are many powerful ponies who will be crying for you to be put in chains, including several noble families whose children were among your victims. Fortunately, with the exception of Runic Passage, there was no other permanent harm done, otherwise things would be dire for you indeed. As it is… well, it will be up to Celestia to determine your punishment.” Luna told her.
Sunset took a deep breath and looked out over the city once more. “No. Princess Celestia shouldn’t be the one to decide. She’ll be too soft on me… she won’t give me the punishment I deserve.”
“And what is it you think you deserve?” Both Sunset and Luna looked back at the door, where Celestia stood, having quietly entered while they were talking. Celestia looked at Sunset sadly and tilted her head questioningly. “Well, my student?”
Sunset lowered her eyes. “You have to imprison me; and not just for a few weeks or months. It has to be years, decades even.”
“Sunset…”
“It’s what I deserve!”
“No it is not!” Celestia objected. “It was my fault, Sunset! I wasn’t there when you needed me…”
“But I’m the one that lashed out!” Sunset almost shouted back. “I’m the one that let my anger get the best of me! It doesn’t matter how upset I was; what I did is inexcusable! I hurt dozens of innocent ponies; they deserve justice! Some will demand it! You can’t protect me this time…”
“She is right, sister. Several of the victim’s families are already petitioning for justice.” Luna put in.
“But it’s my fault…”
Luna sighed and got to her hooves. Reaching up she placed a forehoof against Celestia’s chest and looked her in the eye. “Sister… you cannot always take all the blame on yourself. I know you care for Sunset just as you care for me; but the choices we made were our own. Yes, your actions hurt us, but you did not force Sunset to attack those ponies any more than you forced me to become the nightmare. There comes a point that you have to let us pay for our own mistakes. By law, Sunset would face a minimum sentence of one year imprisonment per victim. And at least five years in the case of Runic Passage.”
Celestia winced, knowing the laws concerning dark magic all too well.
“Besides, it would be for the best if I were locked up.” Sunset added, from where she still lay, by the window. “If I ever were to lose control again… We can’t risk me getting out. Until we find a way to fix this; I have to be locked up anyway. I’ll show you how to block my teleportation spell.”
Celestia looked at her student feeling torn. She and Luna were right; as Princess, it would be immoral of her to deny the victims their justice in order to protect Sunset. Even so; she wanted to… she was so tempted.
Sunset stood and turned toward her, dropping her head down in a deep bow, her snout almost touching the floor. “Please, Princess. I have to be locked up. For justice; and also for the safety of the ponies of Equestria. You know it has to be done.”
Celestia stared at her student as she begged her to be imprisoned, not knowing what to say. Sunset just held her pose waiting for her response. Finally, she reached out and gently lifted Sunset to look into her eyes. There she saw Sunset’s fear, guilt and most of all, her determination to set things right. Tears filling her own eyes, Celestia, stepped forward and wrapped her student in an embrace. Sunset hesitated, but eventually returned the gesture, wrapping her hooves around her. “Alright…” Celestia whispered, though it pained her. Still she held Sunset for several moments more.
“Thank you, Princess…”
Celestia tightened her embrace briefly as if she’d never let go. “But I’m not going to simply throw you in the dungeon.”
“Princess…!” Sunset started to object in exasperation, pulling away.
“It will be secure and you will be confined to your… ‘cell’ for the duration of your sentence, but I’m not going to put you in the dungeon.” Celestia went on. “Besides; you’ll need a good workspace if you’re going to continue work on fixing this; and there’s your other needs to consider as well.”
Sunset looked back at her a moment more in silence. She knew it was still better than she deserved, but she could also see that Celestia wasn’t going to change her mind. She sighed. “As long as it’s secure.” She agreed reluctantly. She couldn’t help feeling guilty knowing that if she didn’t want to be locked up anyway, Celestia would never have agreed to it, despite what justice demanded. But at the same time, she also felt comforted, knowing that the princess would always be there for her when she truly needed it. And it was in that moment that she knew she’d never turn her back on Celestia either.
~~~
A few weeks later, Sunset found herself in a suite of rooms within one of the towers of the castle. Not her original rooms; those had been on the edge of the castle grounds nearest the school. No, this tower was one of the furthest from the city, right near the edge where the castle hung off the cliffs over the valley far below. She knew many unicorns and especially earth ponies, would be nervous being so near such a long drop. Because of this, the tower hadn’t been used for some time. Sunset had never been bothered by heights, though; and now that she had wings, it was even less of an issue.
This was to be her prison. Sunset sighed; Celestia had made the arrangements of course, and so the ‘cell’ was more akin to a comfortable apartment. In addition to the basics; bedroom, bathroom and kitchen; there was also a large study and a sitting room as the entry. The only real difference was the enchantments added to the windows, the locks on the doors, and the anti-teleportation wards including one specifically made for Sunset’s unique teleportation spell. It was secure, but it was still much more than she deserved. But she knew Celestia wouldn’t be swayed, so she would just have to accept it.
Officially her sentence had been set at fifty years; still far less than the letter of the law would demand, but even so, Sunset knew Celestia would try to get her out early. After all, even ten years from now, few ponies would even remember or care. But Sunset had no intention of leaving until she either found a way to change herself back or was absolutely certain that she could control her thirst.
Not that she wouldn’t ever see beyond these rooms in that time. Celestia had arranged for her to be escorted to a secluded training field on the castle grounds on a daily basis for exercise and flight training. She hadn’t had many chances to try flying and the one time she had; when she’d tried to sate her thirst willingly the first time; she’d nearly crashed. Luna had found her clumsiness in flight amusing and just a little odd. According to her, she’d been a rather graceful flyer when she’d been in her feral state.
Sunset smiled thinking of the flight lessons she’d had with Luna in the past weeks. That was one good thing that had come from everything that had happened; her newfound friendship with the princess of the night. Luna had visited her almost daily since she’d woken up back in the castle. Most days they’d simply talk about magic or modern times, though a couple times Luna had vented her frustrations with the nobles or how aggravating it was being stuck in her younger form. She’d even asked Sunset if she’d help her find a way to accelerate her aging. Sunset had agreed, knowing she’d likely have a great deal of free time.
As for Sunset’s need for blood. That was already being provided for. She’d been surprised to find out that ponies in the medical field already had a way to extract blood and transfer it to another pony in need of it, for the rare cases where a spell or potion couldn’t be used. Many larger hospitals even had a small supply always on hoof, in case of such emergencies. If she’d known… Well, it would have been just one more crime added to her list. In any case, Sunset had a special cabinet in her kitchen that had a few dozen bags of blood kept in a stasis spell so it would keep indefinitely. Blood donated by Princess Celestia and Princess Luna themselves for the most part, though Celestia had also asked for volunteers among those of the royal guard who knew about Sunset’s situation. To her surprise, a few had actually volunteered and she was grateful for their generosity. Already the cabinet held enough to last her for at least a couple months.
Altogether it looked like she’d be living in relative comfort while she waited out her sentence. With another sigh, she went to her bedroom and stepped in front of a full-length mirror. There, she looked over her slimmer taller build. To be honest, it wasn’t as bad as she’d thought at first. As she’d thought, she was taller than Princess Cadence now, though only just. Her fur was longer, but after a good brushing, it was hardly noticeable anymore. Truly she liked the longer curved horn; it looked elegant and rather unique in Canterlot. The fangs however; those she could do without. And the wings… Well they weren’t the wings she’d wanted, but they were still wings. And they were truly unique. She’d seen a few nocturne, since Princess Luna had begun reintegrating them into Equestria; their wings didn’t even compare. Not even Princess Celestia’s wingspan matched hers. It wasn’t the body she’d wanted, but so long as she kept her thirst under control, she could certainly make do.
Turning toward the window, she looked out over the valley, over Equestria. She’d made some mistakes, and she would pay the price for them. Here, where she wasn’t a danger to anypony, she would pay the price.
But she wouldn’t give up. She’d find a way to ensure she never lost control again, and then… She looked over at the dresser, where several rolls of paper lay; her original spell. Then she’d find a way to change the world, a safe way. No matter how long it took, she would find a way. She had plenty of time after all.
Sunset smiled.