Author: Raryn
Prompt: A drunk pony sits next to you in a bar, thinks you’re their buddy and starts confessing “the truth”
Title: Why I Avoid Bars
So there I was, minding my own business, when all of a sudden a severely drunk stallion dressed in rags and wearing a hat made of tinfoil pulled me into a shady bar. He dragged me to the counter and sat down on a stool, motioning for me to do the same. Not wanting to cause a scene, I obliged. My new, drunk “friend” ordered a pair of drinks for us and when they arrived he downed his before turning to me.
“About time you showed up,” he said with a belch. “I was waitin' forever for ya.”
"Uh-" I replied, not really following. "Sorry?"
“No matter cause I've finally found out the truth. Now drink up, you'll need it.” Under his drunken gaze, I pulled the glass to my mouth, and drained it, forcing down the sour, acidic liqueur. He shook his head in approval before continuing. “Yes, I've finally found the truth to the question we've been searching for all these long years.”
“Really?” I said, trying to follow the drunk's words as the drink slowly went to my head. I'm not saying I'm a lightweight at holding my liqueur, I'm saying that whatever I drank was something really strong. “Do tell.”
“Yes, the truth is that everything we know about everything is...” From here on, I don't remember the conversation with the drunken pony. I know it was something important but it's all one big blank to me. Anyways, as the drunk finished saying whatever the truth was, a pony came flying from behind the bar, tackling the drunk off his stool and dragged him out of the bar. In my state of inebriation, I'm not sure what I thought of what had just happened, so I took the unicorn stallion wearing a black suit and dark sunglasses that walked into the bar just after the other two left as something normal. The suited unicorn pulled something out of a pocket and floated it in front of him.
“You all saw nothing here today,” he said slowly while waving his front hooves as if they were snakes. His thing-a-ma-jig began to blink with a red light. I turned away from the thing as it emitted a bright flash of light, shooting shadows on the wall behind the bar. What happened after that? Like how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop, the world may never know. I think I fell asleep there at the bar, because when I woke, I was lying in some gutter with a horrible pain in my head. It was then that I swore to stay away from all bars.