Dammit, Discord, that was humiliating. He says you have chaos resistance, but you’d think that would mean not literally turning into bowling pins from a hit from a bowling ball. Sandbar seemed irked by it, Gallus didn’t seem too worried, and Yona? Well she-HEY! “Yona?!” She was bopping your head slowly. “Yona?! Yona, what are you doing?”
“Yona trying to see if Anon fall apart again. Are you sure you pony?” Yona asked as she gave you another ‘gentle’ bop that nearly made you fall over.
“Yes, I’m sure! S-sheesh. Look, like I said, it was just my dad hitting me with his magic. That doesn’t normally happen.” You try to explain to her.
“Yeah, but, why did he do that exactly? Was that ‘important’?” Gallus inquired “Because it seems like a pretty jerkish move to me.”
“Oh, come on, Gallus. It can’t be that! Why would Anon’s dad be a jerk to him?” Sandbar asked, seemingly naive to the reputation Discord has.
“Are you serious? Look, I’m not going to get into it, but I know when a ‘dad’ is being a jerk. I’m just wondering why he did it.” Gallus, who was usually more cool or calm, seemed suddenly upset by what happened to you.
“Maybe Anon do something bad?” Now Yona began to wonder. Goddammit, you didn’t need this. You already knew Discord could be an ass, you didn’t need anyone else wondering about it. It would just cause problems, or even worse, they’d think you were being abused or something.
“Look, it isn’t like that. Dad is eccentric, and weird, and er, kinda does whatever. Trust me, maybe it seems bad that he hit me with a bowling ball, but I promise you he isn’t a bad guy. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for him. Seriously, I really wouldn’t. And this?” You show off your horn towards everyone, as a sign that Discord cares. “This gives me direct access to his chaos magic, which helps me out everyday. And when used right, it allows me to be the hero I need to be. Dad’s shenanigans are just something that happens, and he never means any harm. I mean, he even expects a challenge from me from time to time about it. And…” Suddenly, your eyes met with Sandbar.
Why? Because you were still thinking about Cozy, and how you didn’t want her to be guilty. What if everything you knew was a red herring? Sandbar had spoken up for Discord, just like he speaks up for you, and everyone else. He’s always trying to calm the situation down, rally everyone together, and make any experience more pleasant. Hell, unlike Cozy, he never seemed to have an issue with self confidence or friendship. Was he hiding something? Why is he even at the school? Maybe… Maybe now would be a good time to ask him, because now that you thought about it, something didn't seem right. “Well, I guess that’s one of the real reasons I’m a student at the school. Y’know, all this chaos and stuff? It can get ahead of me. I used to have this trouble understanding the headmare’s way of thinking, maybe I still do. I know I went off on a tangent there, but it’s how I feel.”
“Huh, never would have guessed that considering how some of the professors and counselor Starlight seem to adore you.” Gallus seemed skeptical, giving it some extra thought as he considered all his interactions with you. Then it hit him. “Then again, there was the fact Professor Applejack didn’t seem to trust you before. And there was that joke you told. Then there’s Ocellus, she always gets sorta weird when she’s around you, like you got something to hide. So what then, you got a ‘dark side’?”
“Nah, I just have a chaotic side. I grew up around it, even before dad adopted me. I know I may not look it, and I know I'm chaotic in nature, but friendship is very important to me, and I need to learn it as properly as a pony should. Which is why I was kinda wondering why you’re attending the school, Sandbar.” Finally, a way in! Ok, your reasoning to suspect Sandbar was bullshit, but you never know if one can be a twist villain or not.
“W-wha? Me? What? Why are you asking? I-I mean, erm, uhm…” Sandbar had to take a moment as he stammered out his words. Why did he suddenly seem so nervous? Unless… “Well, uhm, that’s sort of hard to say.”
Oh, is it? Hmmmmm… “Well, I’m asking because you don’t seem like you need to be at the school. You’re confident, trusting, loyal, nice, and always trying to make sure we don’t argue or fall apart. If there’s even one little argument to be had, you always do your best to make sure we don’t fight. Y’know, it just seems to me you understand the magic of friendship quite well. Plus, and this is just me thinking, I don’t even remember seeing you around Ponyville until recently. It made me wonder if you had any reason aside from friendship to attend the school.”
Gallus and Yona suddenly gave you a hard stare, and while Yona seemed more curious at your inquiry, Gallus didn’t seem to like what you were saying. “Why does it sound like you’re accusing him of something?”
“What? Hey, I’m not accusing him of anything.” Holy fuck, you weren’t, you were just suspicious. But then, why? Why were you? On a hunch? On a trope? The pony way would tell you what you’re doing is wrong, and it isn’t right to suspect Sandbar on literally nothing. But fuck it man, the Storm Ravager and anything dealing with him was not something you needed to be public, nor did you need any of his cronies walking about. “I don’t even know where you’d get an idea like that. I can’t be curious? I mean, I live here, I have met a lot of ponies here. I was just wondering, like, y’know... Sandbar is a super cool dude, I just think he understands friendship pretty perfectly is all.”
“Gallus, it’s ok, Anon is being pretty cool actually, uh.” And despite saying that, he seemed more and more uncomfortable. “I mean, that means a lot coming from you, y’know? Since you’re the hero colt and all. But I really need these classes, I just. Look, I just…” Sandbar suddenly became really timid, and began to look down in shame. “I never really had any friends until I met you guys. And…” Sandbar suddenly seized up.
“S-sandbar? A-are you ok?” Yona suddenly became worried, very worried, and walked up and gently rubbed his back without sending him into the ground. Like seriously, she is capable of gentle touch after all.
“Woah, hey, Sandbar? What’s up?” Even Gallus became visibly worried about him, he then shot a glance at you. “Ok, look, let’s just cut it out and get rid of the last of these pies, alright? Can we do that?”
Dammit! He is hiding something! “Yeah, but, erm. Look, Sandbar, we’re all friends here. In fact, I’d say you’re one of my best friends already.”
Everyone stopped, just everyone. Yona looked confused, Gallus had a ‘Is this guy serious?’ face, but Sandbar? Suddenly, his eyes shimmered as he looked onto you, amazed. “R-really?”
“Yeah!” You lied
“Wow, I thought we were sort of not connecting. I thought it was my fault.” Sandbar said as he looked down for a moment, then looked to you all. “But, that's the thing. I always try to keep us together because I’m afraid. I’m afraid we’d fall apart, or stop being friends, or fight, all because of something I did or, erm, didn’t do. I want us all to be friends, but I was seriously thinking that I was annoying you in some way, Anon. And it made me think, maybe everycreature found me annoying.” Sandbar said as he looked upon Yona and Gallus, a great big frown on his face.
“Why would you think that? Geez, maybe I should try to get excited over more things, because I didn’t mean to give off that impression.” Gallus said, feeling, perhaps, maybe he did do something wrong.
“And Yona don’t even know what Yona did to make you think that. From now on, Yona will be your friend even more!” Yona said, as she stood tall and proud, to show Sandbar her support.
Sandbar started to get teary eyed, smiling, and then began to sob. “Y-you guys are the best! It feels good to get that off my chest, I really thought I was messing things up!”
Oh no, oooh no, it isn’t him. He looked so damn pathetic there, and his reasoning was pretty damned sound, same as Cozy. Which meant Cozy was suspicious again, completely. Dammit! Why?! It has to be a coincidence. Someone was supplying the Storm Ravager with apples to eat, they had to be. There was no way the guy was just going to get basket after basket of apples without being noticed. Not unless he was stealing from Cozy without her wondering why she had less apples, but then wouldn't Zecora have had noticed him? And then thereOOF! Suddenly, you find yourself being dragged off by Gallus. “Yona, can you stay with Sandbar for a minute or two? Just gonna talk to Anon about… stuff.”
“Stuff? Gallus, are you alright?” Sandbar asked, as he suddenly noticed that Gallus looked a little angry about something.
“Huh? Yeah, just need to talk to Anon about stuff, it’ll be fine, trust me, be right back.” And before he, you, or Yona could react, Gallus flew up in the air with you in tow.
“Waaaaah! What’s going on?! Gallus?!” You shout towards him as you wiggle in his grip.
“You tell me. What was up with that, Anon? Huh? I thought only griffons used that slick talk to get info or bits out of somecreature, but then there you are doing it for… I don’t know why, but I’m gonna find out.” Gallus went higher up until he was about level with the clouds, grasping you tightly as he looked down on you. “So, what? What are you trying to do, huh?”
“Gallus! Gallus, look!” Shit! You couldn’t just tell him. And yet, why were you even scared? If you were going to drop, it wouldn’t be on purpose, and you still have a charge to save yourself in case he loses his grip. Relax, Anon, you got your info, and all you had to do was calm down the understandably upset griffon. “I just wanted to get to know Sandbar better. Why do you think I’m up to something?”
“Besides the fact you were pushing on him to get him to say something you wanted, or needed to hear, you were also being slick with your little story about how you needed classes at the school. Professor Rarity already seems to think you don’t really need classes, you’re good friends with almost all the professors and counselor Starlight, and Professor Fluttershy thinks you can do no wrong. Then there’s Professor Applejack. She didn’t trust you for a reason, and now I can see why, I can see why Ocellus is just off when she’s around you. I’m a griffon, Anon, I’m used to guys wheeling and dealing others. So, just tell me what you’re really trying to do and there won’t be trouble.” Gallus explains as he hovers in place.
Fuck! How did he… Dammit, you were so used to people usually buying your bullshit that you never thought that Gallus and the others would ever figure you out. But it wasn't like you were the bad guy either! You were just trying to figure things out. “Gallus, I swear, I was just really curious, maybe more than I should have been. If you want the truth, then I’ll tell you. As a hero, I try to pick up on anycreature acting suspicious, and I just thought it was really weird that Sandbar could be so cheerful and full of leadership and yet not have any friends before us. Let me tell you, dude, it isn’t the first time I have seen a villain pull off that kind of deceit. My hero senses were just going off, ok? But I was wrong, I admit it, and I’m sorry. But it’s hard, you know? I have to stay vigilant. But you’re right, I overstepped, I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Geez, are you serious? I mean, I guess that makes sense. But Sandbar, really? I’ve been around him a lot, he’s pretty cool, just kinda soft. Maybe It’s me, but I never felt that he could have been a villain or whatever. Look, that isn’t the point. The point is, and I can’t believe I’m saying this, considering how Professor Rainbow Dash is, but she’s also right that we gotta stay loyal to each other. And trust each other, you know, like how friends should. Nocreature at the school is a bad guy, Anon, I don’t even know what gave you that idea. Heck, I’m a griffon. You never suspected me, like, at all?” Gallus said, a little dumbfounded now that he realized he never came off as suspicious.
“Erm, no, not really. You never really gave me that vibe.” You tell him. Really, he just seemed like a more laid back griffon. Who, despite everything, had a better reason to be at the school than Sandbar.
“Weeeeird. Ok, look, I’m just going to trust you, like I said we should. We’re gonna land, and uh, if he asks, just say we were discussing your hero stuff.” Gallus said as he slowly began to descend. “And don’t even say it, I know it isn’t honest. But I think a little white lie isn’t going to hurt anycreature.”
“Got it, I’ll just make it seem you were asking for tips.” You tell him. Wew, you managed to get out of that one without being ripped apart by those talons or wasting a charge. Yeesh…
“Yeah, whatever.” Gallus said, rolling his eyes. He was starting to pick up now on your more narcissistic tendencies. And as he slowly began to lower himself down with you, you noticed he was still giving you a distrustful glare.
“You don’t actually trust me, do you?” You ask, knowing that look all too well.
“Not really, but I’m going to have to.” Gallus sighs as he stops himself mid-flight. “Look, if your explanation wasn’t so spotty, maybe I would have. Seriously, you always sorta seemed kinda shifty and I didn’t say anything about it before because I didn’t know you all too well. And even though I still don’t, I know you have to be fibbing on me on something, I just don’t know what it is yet. Whatever it is, it’s not as important as making sure Sandbar is ok.” Gallus stopped as his eyes widened in a realization “Woah, can’t believe that came out of my beak. But ok.”
You just sort of hung there in his grasp, silent. Your cute demeanor didn’t work this time, and he can see through your lies, only willing to look past them to make sure Sandbar is alright. You could feel guilt creeping up on you. If Gallus didn’t trust you, and Ocellus had a problem with how you were going about things with Chrysalis, then how long could you keep a bond with your new friends before everything went to shit and...
Chrysalis…
Wait… What if she…
Could it be that she threw you off on purpose? She knew how you could get. Getting you obsessed and knowing you’d find the remains of the Storm Ravager would keep you off her trail, for sure. She doesn’t need to partner with the Storm Ravager, and at this point, she doesn’t need to use him as a lackey. All she needed was to make sure you didn’t suspect her and was preoccupied with someone else so she herself could sneak out at one point and try to get at Twilight. Though, this is also assuming she was arrogant enough to think she could get through all the defenses and precautions set against her. ARGH! What if you were wrong about that too?! One of these had to be the right answer, but which? What if none of them were, and a new threat was truly looming?
Ugh, but priorities needed to be set, and right now you had to deal with the lying situation. So far, everyone has been able to keep your secret for the most part. Cept for Starlight, who just had to tell Trixie. But how could you tell Gallus? You barely knew him. Then again, you barely knew Smolder and she pretty much knows most of your secret. “Ok, Gallus, look. I’m gonna be honest with you, like, truly honest this time. But what I’m about to tell you is super secret. Only my marefriend, the counselor, the professors, Princess Twilight, the crusaders, Cozy, Smolder, and Ocellus, and a few of my other friends know what I’m about to tell you is actually a thing.”
“Doesn’t sound like a super secret if everycreature pretty much already knows. Look, I already said I’m going to try to trust you, you don’t need to come up with some dumb reason to-” But you cut him off. Goddamn it, just get it out, Anon.
“It’s not dumb! Look, Ocellus is weird around me because she lived with me for a long time. Not only that, but she doesn’t like the fact I’m pretty much best friends with her former queen, ChrysaliANSAHEY! GEEZ!” Suddenly, Gallus lets you go, caught in surprise. He quickly dives down to catch you as he tries to regain his balance. “Gallus! GALLUS! Hey! What in the heck was that about?!”
“What do you mean?! You just admitted to being best friends with- Wait, she is one of the greatest evils in Equestria, right? She’s one of the big bads?” Gallus asked, not entirely sure where Chrysalis ranked as a villain. But knew she was still a big evil.
“Yes… Yes, she’s one of the biggest of bads. Look, I’ve been trying to reform her to be good. Princess Twilight is currently helping me with this in one big plan to make her see that friendship is magic.” You explain to him.
“Woah, that’s heavy. No wonder you’ve been shifty this whole time, that’s crazy. I can’t imagine how anycreature else would react if they knew. Wow, considering Silverstream sees you as this super big hero, I don’t think she’d be ok with you being friends with a villain, even if you were trying to reform her.” Gallus says.
“Yeah, so, I don’t need everycreature else knowing about it. You know what I mean?” You ask.
“I get it. It’s kinda deceptive though, you know? Considering half of the group knows and the other doesn’t. Were you going to let us all in on it eventually or… What, what’s up with that?” Gallus, somewhat skeptical of your motives, wanted to know how far your own trust went.
“I like to think of it as a ‘need to know’ basis sort of thing. Eventually, evercreature will know anyway once Chrysalis reforms. So, please, can you keep this to yourself, please?” You ask him. “I need you to trust me.”
“Fine, fine, you have my trust. That’s a pretty big bomb to drop, so I get it. But, Anon, what does this have to do with the way you’re acting towards Sandbar? I don’t get that.” Gallus asked. Shit, you still needed a reason for that.
“Well, er, Chrysalis is still evil, and she still has a thing against the princesses. I dunno, I guess I got paranoid and thought maybe she had somecreature on the inside helping her with her evil plans.” Gee, Anon, what a great lie that is. At least there was some truth to it… Sorta…
“And you thought Sandbar was working with her? Really? I’m just going to take a guess you don’t really do your own detective work, do you?” Gallus was in stoic disbelief. But he seemed to believe you. “I guess that’s what Ocellus meant by you being a bit thick headed.”
D-Dammit! She said that?! Whatever, just go with it. “Yeah, and I guess I overstepped myself, huh?” You say with a false and sheepish chuckle. “Sorry, I guess it was dumb of me to suspect him of anything, huh?”
“Yeah, but whatever, I dunno how it is to be a hero and I guess Sandbar is alright. Hmmm…” Gallus just hovered for a moment, thinking. “Look, I got a good idea to cheer him up. If your magic isn’t going to do anything creepy that is.”
Wut? “My magic? What about it?”
“It’s chaos magic, right? So it can do anything, I think. Look, this isn’t me being soft or anything, I just think Sandbar needs a bit of motivation boost. So, can you like, make fireworks or something? Something that can show up even though the sun is still out? I dunno, something like, a message that said Sandbar is awesome?” Gallus, as he spoke, began to notice how ‘dumb’ it all sounded. “Man, that sounds like geek stuff. But, look, can you do it?”
“I got a charge left for the day, so… Yeah, no problem.” Anything to get Gallus’s trust and make sure Sandbar apparently doesn’t have a meltdown, even though he already looked ok. You use your hooves to grab your horn and place it on your head, you then aim it ahead of you. “This is gonna be simple. Day or night, chaos fireworks can be seen no matter what. So, I’ll just have them say Sandbar is awesome, have his face up there too, and…. BAM!” You let out several shotgun like shots of green lights forward. They all position around you and Gallus as they begin to glow brilliantly. “There we go.”
“Cool… Are they supposed to be so close though?” Gallus asked as he peered close towards the cluster of lights.
“Yeah, because we’re in the sky and… Oh no.” Oh, Anon, why didn’t you think this one through?
Almost immediately, the orbs of magic began to burst around you and Gallus. Gallus backed up, flew forward, barrel rolled, and did his best to outmaneuver the blasts of fireworks. “Well, this isn’t good…” Gallus says with a gulp as he got caught in a huge barrage of explosions. Everything went white as he dove down, unsure of where he even was until he opened his eyes. He was ok! He was ok and already near the ground. Gallus, using his skills as a griffon, does a slow loop de loop to slow his descent as he lands in front of Yona and Sandbar, who were busy looking up at the fireworks.
“Wooooooah, where did that come from?” Sandbar said, noticing the fireworks exploding into uplifting messages about himself, as others exploded into endearing images of his face.
“So pretty, Yona didn’t know fireworks can be seen so good during daytime.” Yona said, stunned by the display.
That’s when Sandbar noticed Gallus. He began to get teary eyed, as he slowly began to realize the only rational explanation to the fireworks. “Gallus, did you and Anon do this for me? Really? Y-you didn’t have to do that. Y-you guys are amazing, I… Thanks.”
“Eh, you know. He had the magic, I had the idea. It worked out. We mean it by the way, you’re pretty awesome for a pony. And a great friend, I guess. Heh. Erm, and your welcome.” Gallus said, looking away, a tad embarrassed from the praise.
“It true, though. Gallus and Anon do great job on showing how amazing Sandbar is. But, wait, where is Anon?” Yona asked as she began to look around.
Gallus looked at his talons, then around himself, then came to a grim realization. “I… Oh…”
“Oh, wait! There he is!” Sandbar said as he waved towards you. “Hey Anon! Are you doingWOAH!” Sandbar, Gallus, and even Yona dove away from you as you meteor dived into the carts of pies, or, whatever pies were left. You destroyed the carts, the pies, and laid in puddle of apple goop.
“A-Anon… Are you ok? Is, er, 'sorry' gonna work? Y-you didn’t break any bones, did you?” Gallus asked, sounding uncharacteristically super nervous as he looked down on the tiny crater you created.
You don’t know if it was the pies, your head, or the combination of both. But somehow, your body survived the crash with minimum injury. However, everything tasted like apple for some reason. “I-I think I’m fine… Is Sandbar ok?”
“Y-yeah, I’m feeling pretty good… Was that crash not planned or something? Are you ok?” Sandbar asked, getting increasingly worried about you.
“I-I’m fine… I’m just going to lay here awhile… Ughhhhhh…” And despite that, you still felt enough pain to barely move as you gurgled the apple filling of the pies.
With the day mostly over, and the pies now gone. Sandbar and the others help you out of the wreckage and begin to take you back to the school to take care of you and make sure you’re ok. Gallus, having been the one to drop you, opts to stay behind to clean up the mess. As Sandbar and Yona head back to the school, you could feel your senses mostly returning to you as you realized you were on something hairy and thick. Were you riding Yona? “Ugh, what’s going on?”
“You spaced out there, Anon.” Sandbar said as he traveled alongside Yona. “Were you trying to do another super awesome dive? Because, er, not to insult you or anything, but you sort of missed.”
“Oh, er. Ngh…” Ugh, your body aches like hell. Fuck, why did you fucking do that? “Yeah… Er, I sorta did. I just didn’t expect to destroy the carts. Er, sorry guys.”
“I-it’s ok, as long as you’re alright. I’m more impressed than anything, I didn’t know you and Gallus were going to do something like that. I, er, really, thanks. I really thought I was doing something wrong, but then you and Gallus just pull off that and I just… I just feel like I really am worthy of everycreature’s friendship.” Sandbar said, still enamored by what happened before.
“Yona already tell Sandbar, Sandbar is amazing friend! Yona figured Gallus and Anon were going to do something like that, why else would Anon ask weird questions?” Yona said, sure of herself despite not knowing what the hell she was talking about. At least to you.
“Y-yeah, that’s it. Hey, as long as you feel better about yourself, Sandbar, that’s all that matters. Which is good, because I want my friends to see what a great guy you are.” You said, referring to the CMC.
“I hope so. From everything Ocellus said, Scootaloo sounds cool, so I’m sure the others are toosdFDFAHHH!” Sandbar said with a sudden shriek.
“Gyah! Snake monster thing!” Yona yells out as she comes to a sudden halt, launching you off her back and face down to the ground.
“Snake monster thing? Excuse me, miss, but I think you have me mistaken for somecreature else. I am Discord, spirit of chaos, father to him.” Discord said as he pointed directly down to you, looking to Yona with a scowl. “I don’t even have scales like a snake. And no, my one foot doesn’t count.”
“D-Discord? Wait, woah, you’re Anon’s dad? Cool! I’ve been really wanting to meet you!” Sandbar said as his fright suddenly turned to wonder.
“Oh? You’ve been wanting to meet me?” Discord suddenly brushes his paw back on his head, smoothing out horns as if they were hair, as he steps forward, stepping on you in the process as you let out a pained groan. “Well, that is something I never hear. I was here over some urgent business, but a little procrastination never hurt anycreature, hm?”
Yona tilted her head. Having seen Discord for the first time, she began to notice every part of him was mismatched, and it was confusing to her. “Yona don’t understand. Why do you have talons and paws? and two different horns? Yona is confused.”
“Good! As the spirit of chaos, confusion is a form of compliment when it comes to me. I’m a draconequus, my dear, we’re meant to be confusing. Now then, you.” Discord makes a seat appear from under himself as he sits, beaming a smile as he awaits whatever Sandbar has to say. “Talk to me, tell me what about me interests you so.”
“Well, Discord, er, sir, I’d have to say everything. Everycreature in Ponyville seems to have some problem with you, but Professor Fluttershy and Anon say you’re pretty great. I was just kind of wondering how you manage to be such a good dad and friend despite being the spirit of chaos. Like, nocreature seems to understand you, but you’re super close friends with Princess Twilight and the professors, right? That must mean despite everything, you have a super deep understanding of how friendship works. That to me, means you’re probably one of the best guys out there, and I gotta know your secret!” Sandbar said, utterly excited to hear whatever Discord had to say.
“Well well. Yes, I have to admit, my reputation is worthy of such praise. Seldom does anypony understand it, it can be quite harrowing knowing everyday that somepony just won’t understand your work, your ways, anything really. But Anon, and especially Fluttershy, and the rest of my friends truly understand me, and know that I will always do my best for them no matter the situation. The same goes for Princess Twilight as well. She’s always kidding around about me, making false negative statements about me as a joke, but understanding how truly astounding I am deep inside. As for my secret, well… Hm?” Discord looks back when he feels a tugging at the back of his rear. He looks down to see you, bruised, stepped on, and highly angry, growling towards him as he looks at you with false wonderment. “Anon? Well now, you look absolutely dreadful, what has your aunt told you about getting enough sleep?”
Your eye twitched as you glared even harder at him, silent in your anger. “You stepped on me, you assDFGF” Suddenly, your mouth gets zipped up as Discord looks back at your friends with a sheepish chuckle.
“Is Anon ok? Yona notices he doesn’t seem very happy to see you.” WHAT?! HAD THEY NOT NOTICED THAT HE STEPPED ON YOU?!
“Oh, he’s fine. He just gets anxious whenever important business is involved. I suppose I should speed this up, as I need to borrow my son. Hm, You wanted to know my secret, right? My secret, my secret… Hmmm.” Discord said as he began to tap at his chin. “Well, it may not work for all, but my secret is simply always being a pleasant surprise to everycreature I see.”
“Hm, that actually makes a lot of sense. It’s kinda like the thing my friend Gallus and Anon did for me just awhile ago, a pleasent surprise, well, I mean a super awesome one. Wow, I guess I know where Anon got that from then. But… Wait, why does everypony else seem to not like you so much then?” Sandbar asked, confused on that particular aspect.
“I’d like to think they simply don’t understand me. Either way, you learn to live with it. As long as you have your friends, and can still have fun, you really don’t need anything else in life. That’s what I say, anyway.” Discord says as he suddenly grabs onto you and hugs you rather gently as he pets your head. “Anon and I are proof of it, a couple of guys who have chaotic adventures. A true blue duo whose friendship will never be snuffed out. Right, Anon?”
“I wfant tgoo killfff youfhhhhh” You muffled out as you tried to rip your mouth open from the metal zip-bindings.
“See? What did I tell you?” Discord said with a smirk as he presented you, holding you forward like a cat. “As my son, there is nopony truly better than Anon.”
“Yona can see that. Yona can also see Anon red from embarrassment. It cute, but Anon shouldn’t worry. In Yakyakistan, yaks have no shame when they hug, smash, or headbutt each other. It healthy and makes yak feel proud. So Anon should feel proud too.” Yona explains, hoping you’d understand.
But you weren’t angry from embarrassment, you just wanted to strangle Discord for stepping on you and ignoring your pain to just narcissistically eat up the praise Sandbar was giving him. And this was after his little gag with the bowling ball too. Goddammit, he's overdoing it this time!
“She’s right, Anon. Oh so right, you can learn a lot from your new Yak friend.” Discord said with a chuckle, as he began petting you again.
“Yona agree. Anon would always be smarter if he listen to Yona more.” Yona said, standing proud and self satisfied.
“Oh, I certainly agree on that, don’t you, Anon?” Discord said as he looked to you, cradling you like a baby.
Why was he doing this?! Why was he even here?! Holy shit, you want to fucking murder him! He just fucking stepped on you like you were a used piece of gum, just to be praised by two animals he never fucking met in his life. What was this fucking urgent thing he even wanted?! Why didn’t he just call you on the codec?! “ASDFDSFSDGFSDGSDFGD”
“Ah, I think he’s wanting to get to that urgent business I mentioned, it’s troubling him greatly.” Discord said as he opens a portal and just tosses you through it nonchalantly. “Which means I must be going as well.”
“O-oh. Well, it was awesome to meet you, Discord. Er, or, should I call you Mr. Discord?” Sandbar asked, only wanting to show Discord the utmost respect.
“Oh no no, much too formal. Just call me Discord.” Discord said as he waved goodbye towards Yona and Sandbar.
“Ok! Got it! Seeya, Discord. And you too, Anon, wherever you went!” Sandbar said with a wave.
“Wait! Yona curious, what business does Anon have? Hero business?” Yona asked, not wanting Discord to go without having her curiosity slaked.
“Yes, that. Goodbye now!” Discord said as he walked through the portal and closed it behind him. It seems he had already either grown bored of the conversation or he just really wanted to see you handle whatever the fuck he grabbed you for.
“GYAH!” You yelled out as you fell face first, once again, onto Discord’s living room. Holy crap, why?! WHY?! “DISCORD! I SWEAR! WHAT STUPID REASON DO YOU HAVE TO DO THAT TO ME, HUH?!”
“Ahrm…” someone cleared their throat, someone familiar. You looked over to see the Dracula pone himself, sipping some tea as he pushed away an ice cube that was floating towards him. “Ugh, this place…”
WUT?! WHY WAS NEIGHSAY HERE?! GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!