//------------------------------// // Chapter 4: Seriously, What Is Going On? // Story: Cogs Of Time // by DmitriTheWriter //------------------------------// Applejack and Discord walked slowly through the deserted streets of the Crystal Empire, pausing only slightly to gaze at the piles of rubble and half-destroyed houses produced by the incessant conflict. “This isn’t gonna work, you know,” Applejack said through gritted teeth. “Oh, come on, Applejack, when have any of my plans ever been terrible?” Discord asked. Applejack simply rolled her eyes before catching sight of a pile of mechanical parts strewn about the road in front of them. One of the parts looked strikingly like the severed head of a pony, with wires coming out of his neck. “Yeah, we definitely shouldn’t be out here,” Applejack said. “Heh, looks like he got ahead of himself here,” Discord said with a chuckle. “Eh? Eh?” “Discord…” Applejack glared at the wisecracking draconequus disapprovingly. “What, I was just making a joke!” Discord said indignantly. “Oh look, there’s an army of robots over there.” Applejack turned where Discord pointed to see that there was indeed an entire battalion of robots right behind them, staring right past them with their soulless red eyes. At its front, the formation was headed by a handsome stallion with a coat of gunmetal gray. “Uhh...howdy there,” Applejack said nervously. “Oh...my...circuits! It’s Apple Chord!” Silicate squealed with delight. “You’ve been my favourite country artist since I was a protoform! I still have all of your albums on vinyl!” “Really?” Applejack said, “Uhh...that’s great, sugarcube! Tell you what, hows about I play something for you and your little group?” She pulled out a guitar and began to tune it to just the way she liked it. “Let’s go with…’Take Me Home, Country Roads’.” Meanwhile, back at the center square, Commander Spatium’s new company of soldiers was wiped out to a pony, and in return the Metal Star wasn’t even scratched. The dust of fallen warriors flew across the battlefield as Flurry Heart picked up the glowing teal sword of somepony since passed and locked blades with Spatium himself. “You will never prevail against us!” Spatium declared, struggling to hold Flurry Heart at bay. “The Kairos Organization has limitless resources and personnel at its disposal! You are nothing to us but a nuisance, a fly on the wall for us to swat with the flyswatter of justice!” “Yeah? And how’s that been working out for you recently?” Flurry Heart asked with a smug grin. “W-well-” “What’s this, two times I’ve handed you your flank now compared to zero times you’ve handed me mine?” Flurry asked. “Oh, I’m sure they’re going to love that back at HQ.” “Uh, um, well mark my words, villain!” Spatium said. “I shall return, and never shall I stop until you are defeated! And your defeat shall be certain!” A swirling portal opened behind the disgraced commander, and he leapt into its embrace as it closed up again. Flurry laughed maniacally as she tossed her sword aside. “Is there anyone who I cannot defeat?!” Almost as soon as she finished her sentence, the ponies formerly known as Princesses Celestia and Luna landed at the center square behind her. Flurry glanced behind her and sharply inhaled, just barely stopping short of a full gasp. “Halt on your path of destruction, evildoer!” Celestia bellowed in the royal Canterlot voice. “For these transgressions against Equestria and its royalty cannot go ignored! Surrender to us now, or face the retribution!” She turned to Luna with a giddy smile on her face. “What do you think, do I sound intimidating enough?” “You sound like you are trying too hard to sound intimidating, sister,” Luna replied. Flurry tried to quickly come up with something before she was blasted into a thin layer of burnt paste on the ground, or worse, brought into custody. “Uh, um…I say it is you who should halt on your...path of destruction. For the Metal Star can destroy you both in an instant!” Meanwhile, the Metal Star was spinning rapidly and flying haphazardly throughout the sky, its circuitry going haywire because it had nothing to blast for fifteen seconds and it forgot what to do with itself. “Alright, I guess you’ve got me. I don’t have anything earth-shattering at my disposal at the moment.” Flurry spread her legs into a battle stance and dragged her hoof across the ground. “But I’m still not going down without a fight!” “Then, as sure as mine name is Celestia, thou shalt suffer our rebuke!” Celestia’s eyes began to glow as she ascended into the air and charged up a mighty blast of magic. Flurry teleported out of the beam’s path at the last possible second, appearing right behind Luna. Before the princess of the night could even turn around, Flurry smacked her in the back of the head, sending her to the ground in a heap. Celestia turned around, but Flurry had already vanished in a puff of sparkly pink smoke. When she appeared again, Flurry was already lighting up her horn in preparation for another spell. Originating from her horn, a thunderous boom of sound rushed the two sisters by, and they felt all of the muscles in their bodies tense up. As Celestia's wings locked up, she fell to the ground like a stone. The two sisters grit through their pain and tried to move their legs anyways. No dice. Their muscles were too stiff. “See? I can do this all day!” Flurry cried out, hoping that her pained gasps for breath, her haggard face, and her disheveled mane wouldn’t cause them to call her bluff. Silicate clapped his hooves like a seal hopped up on sugar. “Bravo! Bravissimo! That was the best thing I've heard in years!” Suddenly, one of his hooves transformed into a laser cannon. The gun hummed with power as it’s muzzle shone with a bright golden ball of energy. “It’s a real shame I have to kill you two now.” “What?!” Applejack turned to glare at Discord in sheer, unbridled fury. “See, I told you this plan wouldn’t work!” “Wait, hold on for just a second, can’t we talk this ou-” Before Discord could even finish his sentence, Silicate fired the swirling ball of instant death at him and his body instantly dematerialized, leaving nothing behind of the spirit of chaos but a wisp of smoke. “And that was for giving the giant space ants the idea to invade Equestria, you random fiasco generator!” Silicate pointed his gun at Applejack. “And now for you.” Before he could pull the trigger, however, a streak of blue came from the sky like a thunderbolt and pounded Silicate into one of the houses, leaving an impact crater about the size of a pony in the crystalline wall. “Yeah, not on my watch, buddy!” Rainbow Dash said. “Rainbow Dash!” Applejack sighed in relief. “Thank Celestia you’re here!” Silicate shook off the shards of crystal from his body and rose to his hooves again. “Metal Army, heed my command! Destroy her!”  The Metal Army did not heed Silicate's command, as it was too busy being hacked to pieces itself by Rainbow's army. Many of the robots who weren’t forcefully dismantled by an angry mob decided to scatter, with some fleeing closer to the center of the Crystal Empire. “Fine!” Silicate shouted. “I’ll do it myself!”  The muzzle of Silicate’s laser cannon began to pool up with energy. He launched another golden ball of scorching death at Rainbow Dash. She took off like a rocket, narrowly avoiding the shot as half of the house behind her was disintegrated.  “Stop moving! I want to demolecularize you!” Silicate fired a few more blobs of disintegration at the rainbow-maned speedster, but her aerial acrobatics were too quick for him.When Silicate went to charge up another shot, he heard nothing but the click of a trigger, and saw nothing but a tiny puff of smoke come out from his gun. The automaton’s optical sensors expanded to their maximum width. “You want to what now?” Rainbow Dash planted her hooves on the ground, with various ponies on either side of her. “Uhh…” Silicate considered his options for a millisecond, and promptly turned tail and ran away. “Yeah, that’s right, you better run away!” Rainbow Dash shook her hoof at the fleeing machine in a comical fashion. On the vast, grassy fields at the edge of the Crystal Empire’s urban core, another swirling rift in dimensions tore itself open. Commander Spatium emerged from the portal, with yet another company of twenty alicorn warriors in formation behind him. He was confident that this time would be the time he succeeded in apprehending the rogue known as Flurry Heart. “Soldiers! Comrades! Lend me your hearts and souls on this day!” Spatium said to his warriors, “For today, we shall fight, and we shall attain glory by triumphing over our most hated adversaries! And ballads will be written of our deeds, for they will be so great and mighty! For we are the Kairos Organization! Oorah!” Spatium’s soldiers looked at him with a mix of boredom and utter disdain for Spatium as a commander and as a person.  “Oh, don’t look at me like that! I am an amazing commander!” Spatium lied. Suddenly, another portal tore itself open in the air in front of Spatium. Out from the gateway trot an alicorn mare. Her coat was a dark purple, and she was clad in full mail armor with a blazing fire in her eyes as she glared at Spatium with seething contempt. “M-Major Authority?!” Spatium cried out, before hastily clearing his throat. “I mean, what a lovely surprise to see you here, Major. As you can see, I have everything here under control.” “Spatium, do you think I’m an idiot?” Major Authority said. “What?! No, no no no!" Spatium hastily said. "Why would you say that, Major?" "Well, for one, you have the nerve to tell me to my face that everything is fine and that you have everything here under control, when the entire Crystal Empire is metaphorically and literally on fire!" Major Authority's voice rose to a shout.  "Well, Major, you have to understand-" "Understand what, exactly?" Authority interrupted. "That you're a half-wit glory hound who only cares about his personal satisfaction rather than the successful execution of our mission? That you're in no way fit to lead any contingent of soldiers based on your inability to pull your head out of your own flank? Because make no mistake, I understand that perfectly well!" "Major, please…" "The mission of the Kairos Organization is to protect the timestream from rogue agents via smart and efficient application of resources and personnel, which now I am certain is a foreign concept to you! What you’ve done here on this day is a complete embarrassment to me personally and the Kairos Organization as a whole! You’re insufferable, inefficient, insubordinate, and indisputably incompetent! Platoon Commander Spatium, you are hereby dismissed!” “Wait, you’re firing me?!” Spatium said. “You can’t fire me!" He turned back towards what was formerly his company. "Guys, she can't fire me, right? Let's go get that rapscallion Flurry Heart, yeah?" "Spatium, I've dismissed you. This is mutiny!" "So it's mutiny, then! What do you say, soldiers? I'm still in charge, right?"  Every single one of his former troops unsheathed their glowing teal swords and pointed them threateningly at Spatium. "Well, forget you guys anyways! I'll apprehend her myself!" Spatium took off like a rocket towards the sky. "After him!" she commanded. The company rose to the skies like a row of fireworks in hot pursuit. "I'll see you court-martialed for this, Spatium!" Major Authority shook her hoof at the sky in a comical fashion.