The sound of a door opening a few yards away startles me awake. I turn over, placing my hands on the wooden floor and pushing myself to a kneel, eyes snapping open and moving to where the sound came from. I relax as I see a familiar light blue pony trot in. She looks over at me, cocking an eyebrow and smiling upon seeing my odd stance.
"Calm down, there, tough guy. Just me, your friendly neighborhood Rainbow Dash."
I soundlessly chuckle, moving my legs forward and sitting down on my small pile of blankets. I pull my knees up, resting my arms on them. Blinking tiredly, I twist my back to pop the ligaments in it. Sleeping on the floor always makes my back hurt; it doesn't help that my back is already weakened from my taller height. I rub my eyes with one hand for a moment, my surprise replaced by tiredness.
"Not much of a morning pony?" I remove my hand, looking at the colorful creature and shaking my head. She gives a short, scratchy laugh, smiling. "Yeah, right there with yah'."
I sit idly for a while longer, then stand up. Bending and twisting every limb I can, I stretch and loosen myself up for the day. I'm rewarded with some nice crackling from my knuckles, and a large pop from my neck. When I'm feeling less of the morning rigor mortis, my gaze goes down to the rainbow-maned Pegasus near me. She stares at me with an odd mixture of worry and curiosity on her face.
"You alright? That didn't sound too healthy..." I nod and smile in reply, showing I'm unhurt. She shrugs, then glances around as if searching for something. Rainbow Dash looks back at me after a few seconds. "Twilight and Spike here?" I shrug, raising my palms. "Looks like she was serious, then...ugh. I really didn't want to spend my day off showing you around. No offense," she adds. Saying 'no offense' doesn't negate the offensiveness. I wave dismissively anyways. "Well, you ready?" I glance down, shoving my hands in my pockets. I feel some paper and the pencil, and nod. The pony turns, heading for the door. I take a look around, then follow her out.
I immediately squint as we step out of the library. The day seems flawless, literally; the sun shines brightly, warming the air around me as it hangs near midday, a light breeze flows through the air, and not a single cloud dots the blue sky. In a way, it isn't right; it's too perfect. It might look more normal if there were at least a few wisps of cirrus clouds high in the air. I avert my focus to my more direct surroundings.
As with yesterday, ponies of all sorts fill the streets as far as I can see. I wonder for a moment if this is more of a town or a city. It looks like a town, but seems to have the population of a city. Maybe it's the fact that there seems to be a lot of ponies because they all stand out to me. I'm ready to go back to good, old-fashioned humans, but judging by what everyone has been saying...
I think back to the letter from the ruler-slash-goddess of wherever-the-hell-I-am. A frown begins to work its way onto my face. Not even a supposedly-omniscient being knows how I got here. I know for sure I don't belong here. Anyone could see that, from the fact that I lack the sort of cartoon-ish look the rest of this place has to that there isn't anything even remotely similar to me as far as the natives go.
"Hey, anypony home?" I see a blur of light blue in front of my face, and my eyes refocus. Rainbow Dash waves her hoof in front of my eyes, hovering in front of me. I blink a few times, and she lowers her foreleg. "Equestria to Mark. Lost yah' there for a sec'." I go to pull out my conversation paper to explain that I had 'zoned out'. "C'mon, we have a town to see. Maybe if we get done fast enough, I'll get in some practice..." she trails off. "Uh...I guess we're pretty close to Rarity's place, so we'll go see her first."
We begin making our way down one of the paths lying before us, the Pegasus flying only a short distance ahead. I notice ponies staring at me, some in wonder, some in disgust, some in fear. I hear the phrase 'diamond dog' murmured quite a bit, as well as 'dragon' and the general question of 'what is that thing'. I don't enjoy the experience at all; attention is something I have never liked. One of the nicer aspects of being tall and very, very quiet; people stay away from you. That seems to be working against me, now. I keep my focus on either the street ahead or to the pony hovering near me.
I follow Rainbow as she turns onto another road. I note that this place has a sort of medieval feel, given the lack of cars and the people--ponies--using the street as their sidewalk. I also see that the streets seem to clear before me like the Red Sea, if the Red Sea was colorful and filled with ponies instead of water. Eventually, a building that seems to stick out from the others catches my eye. It seems to be a few stories tall, and appears completely circular. Various ribbons, drapes, and other decor spruce up the white structure. Atop it is what looks like a small carousel. I'm tempted to question what it is, but it seems to be where we are going, so I patiently continue walking towards it.
The light blue pony and I arrive at the front door of the building; Rainbow Dash glances over at me. "This is Carousel Boutique, me and Twilight's friend Rarity's place. She's really fancy, so just...act fancy, or something." I smile, bringing my feet together and bowing to the hovering Pegasus, twirling my hand in as fancy a manner I know. She snorts in amusement, then knocks on the door with her foreleg. While we wait, I move to a position with my feet together and my hands clasped at my waist. After a moment, the door opens a little ways.
The head of a white pony, a unicorn, with a curled purple mane pops into the opening created by the half-opened door. She appears to be wearing makeup, and it occurs to me that she seems to care about her appearance quite a bit. Not saying that hasn't paid off; she looks quite nice. 'Rarity' notices Rainbow Dash first.
"Rainbow Dash, darling! What brings you here?" the white pony questions in an accent that does come off as high-class to me. It sounds British, yet isn't a full British accent; maybe it's just the way she pronounces her vowels. "Don't tell me you're going to cancel our spa day on--"
"Actually, Rarity, Twilight told me to show somepony new around town today!" Out of the corner of my eye, I see Rainbow Dash blushing furiously. And I had her pinned for the tomboy type, I joke to myself. She directs Rarity's attention over to me with a hoof.
Rarity's eyes widen considerably, pupils shrinking. "Oh, my..." she says shakily. Her face changes, showing a forced smile. "...ah, where are my manners? I'm Rarity." She holds out a white hoof, letting it hang limply. It doesn't look like a normal handshake. Fancy, think fancy. I kneel down to her level, grasping her hoof with my hand. I kiss it lightly, then release, standing again.
"Oh, my!" she repeats. "What a gentlecolt! You must tell me your name, sir." I reach into my pocket, grabbing my crumpled-up paper and pencil. After a second I turn the paper to her.
My name is Mark.
She raises an eyebrow in question, looking up at me. Rainbow Dash steps towards the white unicorn, whispering in her ear, "He doesn't talk." I quietly thank my light blue tour guide for explaining for me. Rarity looks at me for a moment, then smiles sincerely.
"It is very nice to meet you, Mark. Please, come inside, both of you." She opens the door all the way, allowing us to enter. "And don't forget to wipe your hooves!" she calls out behind her. I look down, noticing a doormat, and scuff my sneakers on it. The Pegasus drops to the ground, hastily wiping her hooves on the scratchy surface of the doormat. I swing my arms into the building, bowing towards her.
She grins, giving me a look. "Show off." I follow the small pony inside, making sure to shut the door behind me. I look around, taking in the room I stand in. It appears to be a shop of some sort, one which sells dresses. Dresses made specifically for ponies, that is. Pony-shaped mannequins line the room, all of them bearing different styles of dresses. Some are very flashy and modern-looking, others are refined and elegant; there are even a few designed specifically for Pegasi, with holes for wings to fit through. The shop is pristine; everything is orderly and aligned with the rest of the room, the floor is spotless, and there is not one loose item to be seen. It pleases the minor OCD I seem to possess.
I see Rarity tending to one of the mannequins, adjusting the dress on it for a reason I cannot discern. It looks fine to me. "So, Rainbow, you said Mark here is new in Ponyville?" she questions, her focus elsewhere. I glance over at Rainbow Dash, who glances back before replying.
"Yeah, uhm...well, he's sorta' new...everywhere. Like, to Equestria. He's not from here, I guess." Her magenta eyes dart over to mine in question, and I nod in confirmation. Looking back at Rarity, I see she stops messing with the dress.
"I see..." the fashionista unicorn replies. She peers at me for a while, as if observing me more closely than before. "...well, darling, I can assure you that you've already made some very good friends here. Who else knows of this?" she asks, aiming the question at Rainbow Dash.
"Just me, you, Twilight, and everypony we passed getting from Twilight's to here, so far. Oh, and the Princess."
Rarity nods, seemingly satisfied with the answer. "Alright. Is there anything I can do to help, Mark?" I don't feel a need for any dresses, so I shake my head. As if reading my mind, she replies, "I don't just make dresses, you know. I can see you have a much more...casual style. If you ever need new clothing, do not hesitate to ask." I nod and smile gratefully. "And you, Rainbow Dash?"
The pony in question shakes her head. "Nah', we'd better get going, introduce him to everypony else. Later, Rares."
As Rainbow and I begin heading for the exit, Rarity calls out behind us, "Goodbye, Rainbow Dash! It was very nice to meet you, Mark!" I wave, then exit the boutique. Once we get outside, the light blue Pegasus again takes the slight lead, hovering at eye level with me. After we get a short distance away from the building, heading towards a new destination that I am unaware of, she looks over at me, a look of curiosity on her face. I notice she looks up and down my body; I wonder with a little fear if she's checking me out.
"Why do you wear clothes all the time? I mean, don't you get hot or anything?" she asks. I internally sigh in relief, pulling out my writing utensils.
Humans (which is what I am) don't have very much fur, so we get cold easily.
I show her the folded paper, then think of something that somehow seems necessary to add.
Also, it covers more private areas.
She raises an eyebrow, looking over at me with a smirk. "Wait, you guys are scared of being naked?" Trying to suppress the heat rising in my face, I nod. The pony brings a light blue hoof to her mouth, trying to stifle a laugh; some of it escapes anyways. I give her a look. What's so funny? She notices, and lowers her foreleg, still smiling with mirth. "Sorry, that's just kinda' weird. I mean, look around, everypony's naked." I don't look around, instead keeping my gaze locked onto her face. I can't control my blushing at this point; Rainbow Dash giggles as she watches my embarrassment grow. Face, focus on faces, nothing else, faces.
After a fairly awkward silence, I recall a question of my own. I scribble down my question, smiling like a fox as I show the hovering pony the writing.
So a spa day, huh?
My smirk widens as I watch Rainbow's cheeks flare pink, eyes widening. She shoves her foreleg into my palm, attempting to crumple up the paper. I pull it away, shaking with laughter as I shove the paper in my pocket. She swings a hoof at me, slugging me in the shoulder. Quite honestly, it hurts like hell; I did not expect a pony to possess enough strength to not know they had it. Maybe she intentionally hit me hard, though. I rub my shoulder, continuing to chuckle quietly, my smile also serving as a grimace. Damn, that's gonna' leave a bruise...
Rainbow Dash looks at me with a mixture of anger, embarrassment, and some leftover happiness. She leans down, lowering her voice. "If you tell anypony about that, I will buck you to the moon. Got it?" I nod, but can't help but continue smiling at her. "You gotta' Pinkie Promise," she says seriously. Man, she's pretty touchy about doing girly stuff. I raise my right hand up to her, extending my pinkie finger. She looks at it, frowning. Wait, how would they even pinkie promise wihout pinkies?
Rainbow lets out a sigh. "Just repeat after me, okay?" She begins flying sideways, drawing some question and awe from me, and begins moving her forelegs about. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." As she says this, she draws an 'x' across her chest with her hoof, then follows it up by moving the hoof to her eye. "Now you." I raise an eyebrow at first, but assume she just wants me to do half. I use my pointer finger to draw an 'x' across my chest, then jab the finger near my eye, nearly poking myself. The A Christmas Story version of a pinkie promise, I guess.
"You can't ever tell anypony, ever. You Pinkie Promised." I nod solemnly. Why would I tell anyone that you like doing something girly? Got an image to keep up? For the time being, I assume she does. Rainbow Dash stops, and I look forward, surprised at how fast we arrived at the next stop on my grand tour of...Ponyville? Yeah, that's it.
The building we stand (or hover) before also seems to stand out from the rest of the cottage-like houses filling the town. It looks like some sort of confectionary, as there are various desserts sitting in a large window at the front of the shop. A wooden sign hangs above the door, one which reads Sugarcube Corner. I step forward and push the door open, holding it there for Rainbow Dash. I may not have Rarity's idea of good manners, but that doesn't mean I don't have any at all. I follow the pony inside.
The first thing I notice about this place is the smell. Scents of vanilla, chocolate, sugar, spices, and general baking fill the air, combining to make a tasty smell. throughout the room are various tables, at which a few ponies sit, eating desserts such as cupcakes and doughnuts. A glass display case, which also serves as a counter, sits at the back of the room, showing off every kind of dessert imaginable, from cupcakes of all colors, to birthday and wedding cakes, and even what appears to be a moose made out of mousse.
The second is a vibrantly-colored pony standing behind said counter. I believe it to be a she, as it is colored pink with a frizzy, pink mane. I mean, I suppose pink can be masculine on polo shirts or something of the like, but not with this much pink involved. The pink pony appears fairly normal, otherwise, lacking any wings or a horn. For a normal pony, though, she seems...well, abnormal.
"Hey, Pinkie! Come meet Mark. He's..." Rainbow Dash pauses, giving me a sly grin. "new in Ponyville." Wait, why did she emphasize--
To my surprise, the pink pony, aptly called 'Pinkie', apparently, begins bouncing behind the counter. In one deft leap, she jumps over the counter, landing near me. She begins bouncing up and down rapidly in a manner I can compare to a jackhammer when in use. Pinkie bounces in circles around me, twirling about as she does so.
"Oh my gosh, somepony new in Ponyville?! I'm Pinkie Pie! It's nice to meet you, Mark! I know everypony in Ponyville!" Pinkie Pie takes in an impossibly huge gasp of air. While she does, I look at Rainbow Dash. What have you done? "We have to throw you a party! A 'Welcome-to-Ponyville-Mark-Party'! With balloons! And streamers! And confetti! And more balloons! No, less balloons...more confetti! And electro music, because you like that stuff! I don't, it just sounds like a bunch of beeps and boops to me. Oh, wait, you haven't told the reader that you like that yet, have you? Oops! Oh, well. Okay, I actually have eight more parties today, so we'll have to work you in some other time, maybe a few chapters from now..."
I silently mouth the words 'help me' to Rainbow Dash, who is trying her best not to burst out laughing. She wipes a tear from her eye, then decides to have mercy on me. "Okay, Pinks, we've got to go visit everypony else, so we'll talk to you later." I count my blessings.
Pinkie Pie freezes, mid-bounce, still hanging in the air. "Okay, Dashie! See you guys later! Bye, Mark, nice meeting you!" I smile quickly, then walk as quickly as I can to the door.
Rainbow chuckles. "Pinkie Pie, you are so random." She follows me outside, immediately taking to the air beside me. I grab my pencil and paper, scribbling for a moment.
What's wrong with her?
I receive a laugh in reply. "Pinkie Pie," she says, as if it's supposed to explain everything. I just decide to go with it, writing down my next question and holding it up to the Pegasus.
'Pinkie Promise'?
"What about it?" I point back towards Sugarcube Corner. "Oh, yeah, that's where it comes from." Thinking of my last question, a smile begins to form on my face as I jot it down.
'Dashie'?
The sky-blue pony blushes for a moment at the pet name, then scowls at me. "Don't. Say. Anything," she says, in that odd mixture of anger and playfulness. After a second, we both realize the irony of the statement. Laughing, we head towards the outskirts of the town.