//------------------------------//
// Ponyville Falls Ill, Part 2 (S2 E21) 
// Story: Unpleasant Correspondence 2 (My Little Pony: Reign of the Goddess-Queens) 
// by StormLuna 
//------------------------------//

Dear Starlight, 

Well I got the surprise of my life today.  I wound up getting a cashier's check from Manehattan National Bank in the sum of 25,000 bits!  Now Dr. Disease Killer was not thrilled apparently because he sent a letter with it calling you two horrible bitches and he called me a spoiled brat!  Can you believe that?  He had the audacity to call the head mare of the school of friendship a spoiled brat.  What a bastard.  I swear, if I had things my way I would fine him even more solely because of the name calling.  Anyway, just take that into consideration.  You certainly don't want him to get away with calling me names now, do you?

Happy for the Bits, 

Bright Beam 





Dear Bright Beam, 

We fined him that amount for releasing Luster and Trixie from quarantine too soon and decided to give you the money since you are our favorite.  Being our favorite does have its perks and getting fine money is one of them!  Now regarding fining him for simply calling you names, that may be a bit excessive.   You know we think very highly of you and care a lot about you but we can't go fining ponies over the tiniest of things.  Anyway, do what you want with the money.  Right now though, my sexy sister and I are making plans on punishing Luster and Trixie for doing shit that they have to be away from their duties again. 

Making Devious Plans, 

Starlight 





Dear Hoo'Far, 

Remember me, Starlight Glimmer?  Well as you probably know I am now a Goddess-Queen ruling in Equestria alongside my incredibly sexy sister Twilight Sparkle.  I am curious, are you still interested in that rusted out piece of junk that Trixie calls a wagon?  If so, go down to Ponyville and claim it.  Now we think it would be sweet if you could get us some Alicorn sized Saddle Arabian robes.  Hell we'll even make it worth your while because Twilight and I want to be able to make addresses to the nation in style and nothing is more stylish than robes from your country.   Let us know if you still want it, alright?

Sincerely, 

Goddess-Queen Starlight Glimmer





Dear Goddess-Queen Starlight Glimmer, 

I am still interested in it and I will even give Trixie my much larger wagon along with some robes that will fit you and Twilight.  I want to see you and Trixie dazzle the crowds once more and I want you to come to Saddle Arabia so I don't have to travel to Ponyville to do it.  See you soon. 

Hoo'Far






Two Weeks Later


To the Incest Bitches, 

Where's my wagon?  When I got out of quarantine I headed back to the castle and my wagon was gone.  In its place was this horrible, overgrown monstrosity of a caravan there instead.  Wait a minute, Starlight did you contact that Saddle Arabian unicorn and trade my wagon away, AGAIN?  You are the same bitch as always you wagon trader-awayer. 

Anyway, Luster is still in the hospital and now I am even more upset.  I still can't see my true love and I'm stuck with a huge caravan I can't even pull!  Curse you Starlight, curse both of you.  The Great and Powerful Trixie is devastated, she doesn't have her wagon and she doesn't have her sweetie.  All Trixie has is a dragon who is an asshole and a filly who she knows is plotting to do something horrible to her. 

Sad and Angry, 

The Great and Powerful Trixie 





Dear Trixie, 

For starters, yes I did trade away your wagon because I simply felt like it and have the authority to do so.  Up until now, I was still pissed that I had to give those robes back to Hoo'Far when you just had to have that rusting junkyard on wheels back.  Now not only will you and Luster have a more spacious caravan to travel around in but my incredibly sexy sister and I have matching Saddle Arabian robes!  Now we can address the nation in more style than we ever could with anything Rarity would make for us. 

Now I know you said that you can't pull that large caravan on your own.  Maybe you and Luster can try pulling it together because with your combined strength, you should be able to pull it off.   Now if you will excuse me, Twilight and I are going to try this abuse stuff that Colgate and Twinkleshine told us about one time! 

Traded your Crappy Wagon Away (Again), 

Goddess-Queen Starlight Glimmer 

P.S.  In your face Trixie!   My sexy sister loves me so much, so much more than she ever did you!  She even used her own money to pay for our new robes!  Now if you and Luster would get freaky like Bright Beam and her harem does, you two could go on the road and put on live pornos!...no wait, I take that back.  I don't want you making ME look bad. 

--  Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle