//------------------------------// // Exile // Story: Unexpected changeling // by The ancient one //------------------------------// “Stop it, Rarity.” I said aggravated that Rarity was humming in my ears. “Knock it off, Rarity.” I said trying to smack away the magically floating brush that was mauling my new mane. “Oh stop fidgeting, Shifting Sands. You want to look dapper when I take you over to Twilight's, Don't you?” She questioned with her lip pushed out, showing she wasn't paying any attention to me, as I nearly broke my neck shaking my head is direct response to her question. “Just a bit of make up should do the trick...” She whispered, she slowly began lifting make up products with her magic and pushed them towards me. I smacked them out the air. “LISTEN YOU! I am not a DOLL! I said i'm not going to the library and that's FINAL!” I stated with finality. “Hmm...your gestures, the tone in your voice...even though I can't understand you, I can tell one thing. You must be absolutely excited to be going over to Twilight's house!” She said gleefully. “How, in the blue popcorn farts of hell, did you make it through kindergarten?” I said with a stare of confusion mixed with disbelief. “This is your last warning, I-” She smacked me with some sort of evil fluffball, it gave off all manner of dust, obviously trying to choke me. “FINISHED! What do you think?” She turned me to the mirror. “I think the fiery passions of anger I desire to give you, that burn deep within my soul, shall never be washed away by the passage of time, for this act is far too heinous, a transgression.” I said, with my hair styled like Elvis. We heard a bell, Rarity looked and trotted towards the door. I was still looking at myself in the mirror, wondering how I got into this mess. I then proceeded to slam my face into the desk, repeatedly. “Shifting Sands! Stop!” Rarity screamed in horror, “You'll ruin your freshly done mane!” “Rarity, I think a bigger issue would be the fact a baby is damaging his brain.” Twilight corrected. “Oh right” Her eye-lids lowered a bit, and she looked to the side. And I wasn't too fond of the tone she said it in, obviously she didn't forget the insults of yesterday. I rubbed my hooves through my mane, turning it back to normal. It's droopy, but somehow spiky, normality. Though the fact it was in my face could get annoying. Rarity only turned her head, insulted that I didn't grovel down before her, for all the work she did. Twilight then began to lift me using her magic. “Anything to say to Rarity before we leave, Shifting Sands?” She said playfully. “Yes, your flank is still huge!” I roared. She pinched my cheek, and waved goodbye as Twilight left the store with me on her back. --------------------------- At the library, Twilight had sat me down in the middle of the room, on a table with supplies on them. “Spike, can you get me the reference guide on changeling anatomy?” She asked, giving me odd stares. “This Sparkle Vampire named horse better not be thinking about cutting me up” I thought to myself Spike went to get the book, climbing onto the ladder and rolling his claw over them, as if he'd remembered the feel of each one. After a second or two, he'd found it and jumped down and brought it to twilight. She then opened the book and stared at it, then back at me, then back at it, then back at me. To which my only response was, “Look at your book, now back to me, now look back at your book, back to me. I am not your book, you're a stupid horse, now look at spike, back to me, where is my hoof? It's across your face, I slapped you, because i'm dead tired of being glared at!” The slap didn't yield much effect. “Aggressive, aren't you?” She said rubbing her cheek. “Hey, you can't slap Twilight like that!” Spike defended. “Spike, he's a baby, don't worry about it.” She attempted to calm him. “But Twilight-” “Ap-Ap-Ap! No. Calm down Spike, I know you care, but we can't get too angry with him.” She continued being a calm stupid animal. “Now, i'm going to go get Applejack to help me, you stay here and watch over him.” “Alright.” Spike said with a small halo appearing above his head. What? You expect me to say something? I told you, I gave up questioning the things that happen in this world. Between getting kicked back and forth through time, the walls of fire appearing out of nowhere, and the insanely happy horses somehow going in one ear and out the other, I am completely immune to this sort of thing. As soon as Twilight closed the door his halo turned into horns. Nope, still not questioning it. “I know what you said, unlike Twilight I can hear what you're saying.” He challenged getting in my face. “Then you'll understand when I say, BACK UP OFF ME!” I pushed my head against his, suddenly entwined in a battle for skull supremacy. “I don't know what you're planning, but it won't work! Not so long as i'm watching you.” He stated as if he was on some soap opera. “Spike, your fire, does it just go to the Castle or is It programmed to send only to Celestia?” I asked, giving a small smirk. “Well it goes only to Celestia, it's an effective way to call for help. So don't get any ideas!” I got onto my hooves and walked to the staircase on the right and picked up a book that was left on the ground. I then tore out several pages from it. Around twenty or thirty. “HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! THAT WAS ONE OF TWILIGHT'S FAVORITE BOOKS!” Spike shrieked. I then took those pieces of paper and went to the desk which was held in the center of the room. I picked up a small quill and wrote, 'Your son is in danger, please come as soon as you can.' along with many, many, many nasty things about Celestia. I then curled them up, put a little ribbons on them, threw the ink onto the rest of the table and climbed up the ladder leaning on the bookshelf, and placed the handmade scrolls between as many books as I could. I then jumped down and walked up to spike. “Spike, i've just torn out multiple pages from one of Twilight's favorite reference guides, thrown ink all over the décor, and wrote a notes saying that I was in danger and Celestia should come get me, along with many rude things about her. As you can guess, Twilight has little knowledge of how smart I really am, but she has total knowledge of how smart you are. She also knows how jealous you can be, like that time with Owlicious.” I stated matter-of-factually “Hey, how did you know about-” I cut him off by raising my hoof, continuing myself “Twilight will obviously be back to see that her book is shredded and ink is all over, so all I have to do is point toward you and then the shelf. Since Twilight thinks i'm just a normal baby, she will obviously look to you as the source of the problem. She may even kick you out.” I prepared myself by turning around. He took a deep gasp in horror. “Fire in the hole” I stated with a grin. I bucked him in the stomach, causing his magical flame to encase the entire shelf and it's contents. Once the fire had calmed down, we both looked at it. Beautiful. “Oh don't worry, your magic only works on scrolls. Those got to Celestia just fine, the books however, are perfectly burnt. Congratulations!” I shook his claw. His jaw dropped and his eyes shot towards me like a bullet, terrified and unsure of what to do. “I sure hope whatever Celestia was doing wasn't important.” I tapped my chin. Meanwhile at Celestia's undisclosed location. “This requires a clear mind, i'll need to be as calm I can get if you wish me to close this seal” Celestia said to a quaking mare with a very odd color scheme, teal body and orange mane and tail. “What happens if you lose your focus?” The mare asked fearfully, as if she couldn't hold still for even a moment. She looked at the mare, “Well, I suppose whatever evil was locked into place would get out and i'd have to get into a battle with it. But honestly, what are the chances of that?” She laughed off the idea. She then began using her magic as a portal opened infront of her, bolts of lightning shot towards her general area, and the ground quaked. The shaky mare held her eyes shut, and loud roars came from the vortex. Cryptic symbols began appearing around the portal and screams of thousands echoed forth and the portal closed completely. “Done, see? No troubles.” She said happy with herself. What? You thought the notes were going to appear while she was busy? Shame on you for thinking such an awful thing would happen! The flurry of notes then fell onto her and she read each one. Every, single, one. “TWILIGHT SPARKLE!!” She screamed and shot into the sky. Meanwhile back at library. “Spike, you might wanna close your mouth. Bugs are going to nest if you don't close it.” I smirked at him. He looked at me “How could you?!” He pleaded. “How could I? You have no idea who I am or what I am capable of. I have torn creatures more than yourself apart and drank their blood (Prototype 1 & 2), I have seen my comrades die before my very eyes, crying out to me for help (modern warfare 3), I have slashed throats and entire bodies to shreds (ninja gaiden), i've gone toe to toe with hundreds of soldiers, without getting a single scratch (Dynasty warriors), and I have battled creatures who have used meteors in attempts to destroy me (Bayonetta). DO NOT, and I repeat, DO NOT! Underestimate me. I am out of your league.” I threatened Spikes eyes bulged, pupils shrunk, he then fainted and fell to the ground. I may be responsible for the emotional and mental scarring of the dragon...Sweet! I sat there with a smile on my face, before turning my head around to see all that I had done. I then returned my gaze back onto spike who was still out. “BORED NOW!” I shouted. I looked to the staircase to see another flight of stairs leading down. “That's where Twilight does all her experiments. Could be worth a glance or two, anything to get me from being bored” I said traveling down the path to the basement. There I saw test-tubes of all shapes and sizes, Tesla-coils, beakers filled with colorful liquids, machines standing tall with colorful buttons all over them. No doubt, this is one of the best places i've been to since I arrived. I traveled down the stairs and walked up to the beakers and test-tubes in the center of the room. “So many chemicals, so many colors, I wonder what they do...” I pondered, picking up a couple vials of blue, grey, black, and red liquids. I wanted to get a closer look, but I was having a hard time holding onto them, and they began slipping. “Uh-oh...” Meanwhile upstairs. Twilight had just returned with Applejack beside her, both of them ready to give me the proper care I need. Twilight then saw all of her burnt books, and a fainted spike. Her expression ranged somewhere from shocked, to angry, to demented. “SPIKE!!” She screamed, but to no avail, the dragon was still out. A sudden rumble came across the house, a boom rather, then smog began lingering. What on earth could that have been? They wondered before looking to the basement entrance. “Uh, Twilight. Where's Shifting Sands?” Applejack asked with a quizzical look. “I don't-” It suddenly struck them. That I could be down in the center of that explosion. Twilight covered her head in a magic bubble, she didn't want to breath the toxic fumes I had been exposed to. She then ran down into the basement and grabbed me with her magic, creating a protective veil around me and brought me back upstairs. “Shifting Sands, are you ok!?” She worriedly asked. “Haha. Why are you so purple? Snrk, Hahahaha” I Said, seeing everything behind Twilight as a blurry mix of colors. “He's gonna be ok, right Twi?” She started holding her breath in anticipation. Twilight looked at Applejack with a partially confused face. “Well there doesn't seem to be any problems” She looked back at where I was, only to learn I had somehow escaped her magic field. “Huh!? Where did he go?!” She panicked. “I'M BATMAN!” I said smacking the ground next to twilight, after jumping off the railing at the top of the stairs. “Oh, I found him!” She smiled. I ran back up stairs and jumped off the railing screaming “DU-NU-NU-NU-NU-NU-NU BATMAAAAAAAAN!” Smack dab into the ground again. Applejack blinked, “No problems, huh?” I slid on my back across Twilight's back “Whoa...You feel so purple, but taste sooo blue!” I slid onto her face, still on my back. “Snrk Hahaha!” I fell onto the ground again. Twilight smiled and squeed to AJ. “Hahahaha! You're an apple? And a horse? Does that mean your family is full of horse apples? HA!” I slid across her underbelly somehow defying gravity. “Twilight.” She deadpanned. “Yes AJ?” Twilight replied. I grabbed Applejacks face “MY PARENTS ARE DEAAAAAAAD! No wait...just my mom...I made myself sad” I flopped to the ground. “He's not gonna be like this forever, right?” She asked, bemused. I scooted myself along the ground using only my hind legs, I scooted to spike. “Dude, dude, wake up dude. Dude! Duuuude. Dude. Yo, Dude?” I slapped him “Dude, wake up dude. Dude.” He opened his eyes and looked at me. “Spike! I may have just realized something!” I said shaking. “W-What?” He was unsure if asking was the right option. “I think i'm a ghost!” I said horrified, my big blue eyes bulging from my head. Spike sat there, silent. “I mean, just look at my hooves.” I raised them, “They can't touch anything but themselves” I brought my hooves together, “See!” “...What's wrong with you?” He asked, befuddled at the comment I had just made. “NOTHING! WHY!?” I quickly answered, looking around, shaking like an earthquake had struck. He looked to see Twilight conversing with Applejack about the situation. He walked over to them and asked what was going on, but the best they could answer him was with a shrug. “Spike, ah need y'all to start a bath. We wanna wash off whatever is on him.” Applejack ordered, as if she was prepared for this situation. Spike ran off to do as he had been told “WHAT ARE THESE THINGS ON MY BACK!?” I yelled, scared of myself. I accidentally began flapping my wings and started to hover. “Whoa...” I leaned on my side and soon began spinning in circles. “GET ME OFF THIS CRAZY THING!!” Applejack grabbed me and rocked me, humming a softly tune. It was enough to calm me down. “Thanks AJ, I don't know how this day could get any worse.” She let out a deep sigh. “What exactly were y'ah workin' on down there anyway?” Applejack whispered, trying not to stir me up again. “I may have been experimenting with changeling repellants...” She withdrew. “Why ahn earth would y'all do that?” She deadpanned. “Well, since no one really has this kind of an opportunity, I thought Shifting Sands could help me make a small repellant I could sell, this way Equestria would be safe from changeling invasions!” She tried to put an upbeat tone to what she said, it failed. Applejack simply stared through her lie. “Hey, my equipment doesn't pay for itself, you know.” Twilight blinked, turning her head towards her lab on the right. Spike ran back in, telling Applejack the bath was ready, and after a quick wash I was good as new, for the most part. Applejack dried me off and took me to bed, perhaps a small nap could get me to come back from whatever reaches of space I was in. As I lay in the bed I closed my eyes and began to dream, darkness was everywhere. I turned around in the shadows to see Twilight's head, a giant head. It gave me a blank stare and shot me with a blast from her horn, I went spiraling into an ocean of rainbows and started flailing my body, I sank into the water and was eaten by a giant snake, and inside this snake was a party of shoes, hats, mice, flowers, and other versions of me. Some with big heads, others with small bodies, some with horns that made shapes like hearts or spades. They all looked to me and waved, I stood there, smiled and waved back. The room and everyone in it melted and turned into quicksand, I started sinking as Super Mario and Spider-man came running by, using my head as a platform to cross. In the quicksand I fell out of an hour glass and landed in the library. Twilight, Applejack and Spike were all there. But their faces were blank. They turned themselves to me and said, “Would you like know a secret?” I slowly nodded. “You're standing on a rhino” They said. I looked down to see I was indeed standing on a rhino, which had quickly morphed into a Venus fly trap and bit down on me and threw me out the window. Breaking through the glass I suddenly found myself in space. Luna passed by on a comet playing a violin, while Celestia was eating the moon like a cookie. I started falling towards a vast black hole, in which I was sucked in and blown up into millions of me, which bloomed into flowers, and then ran and refused back into the original me. I turned my head around my body as if I were an owl and started barking. The room flashed white, and in that split flash, I was standing as a human in-front of me as a changeling. The human me reached out his hand and the changeling me did the same with my hoof. The second we touched we turned into doors, we opened revealing Fluttershy and a taco. And then we closed and burned to ashes, and from our ashes I was reformed with a phoenix body. I flew into the sky where my wings melted like wax, and my liquidized wings then reformed into jeff goldblum. He spoke to me “Stop need so love many before bed.” He then exploded and I found myself in a room with another changeling me. “I thought today was suppose to be special” I said to him. “You don't think tripping absolute balls is special?” He retorted before he flew off, on a cloud of spaghetti, candy, and confetti, to Celestia with Twilight's body and Applejacks tail. --------------------------- I awoke with my eyes wide open, with only one word to describe my experience, “Whoa...” however that didn't seem to be enough. I heard clacking, the now familiar sound of hooves making their way to me. It was Applejack, making her way to check on me. “Hey there sugar cube, how y'all doin' nao?” She asked, that southern accent never getting old. I looked around to see if anything was out of place, everything seemed to be in order so I nodded to her. “C'mon then, we need ya downstairs.” She bobbed her head to the left, gesturing to me to follow. What could they need me, a baby, for? I followed her out of the room and down the steps. A sudden “Surprise!” had blasted me back a bit, and to my surprise, a party had been thrown in my honor. The room was filled with ponies I had never seen, or at least never met personally. Even sir Pedo-Pony managed to arrive. I looked up to see if there was a banner saying what this party was about, there was. It was just a simple banner saying, “Welcome, Shifting Sands!” A welcome party? Kinda late isn't it? I mean i've been here for a long while now. “Ya' look a little puzzled there, little fella.” Applejack said, with a warm smile. Pinkie Pie managed to pop out of a hole in the floor and surprise me. “Since the party we had in Canterlot had to be cut short due to your...uhh 'malfunction' I decided to make it up to you and throw you a new one here!” She screamed shooting out like a rocket. “That's nice, but your a little late, aren't you? I mean it makes sense if I had just arrived, but i've been here for days. What exactly took that thought process so long to register this party?” I questioned her. She only smiled and giggled, I wonder what she was hearing. Pinkie Pie called Applejack into the kitchen, she need some help with the cake. I really hope Applejack is wide awake, other wise i'm gonna need to go to the hospital again. “Pinkie Pie throws parties just for the sake of throwing a party, so don't expect them all to make sense.” I heard a small male voice direct at me. I looked to see it was Spike, scowling at me. “Something wrong, pretty boy?” I said sarcastically. “You got me in a lot of trouble today, you know that!” He aimed his claw at me pouting. “No! Really? I had no idea, that was so wrong of me. Bad changeling!” I said playfully smacking my own hoof. “You're a real jerk, you know that?” He frowned at me. “If you think you're in trouble now, wait until Celestia shows up. I signed them all with Twilight's name, and if she thinks YOU sent them. Well, let's just say it won't be pretty.” I grinned. “What's your problem? I haven't done anything to you, and neither has Twilight. Why are you so mean?” He got up in my face again. “Because having friends is overrated. I never had any before and I don't need any now.” I pushed him back. “Is that so? You know what I think?” He got BACK in my face. “No, and I don't care.” I said walking away from him, he followed me. “I think you're just lonely. That you've been so lonely that you're too scared even try to make friends.” He said, shooting that arrow in a spot too sensitive to handle. “Whose ready for some cake!” Pinkie pie screeched aloud to everyone, who then turned their attention to me. I gritted my teeth and slammed his head into the ground. “You don't know ANYTHING about me!” I snarled at him. The crowd gasped. “Shifting Sands!” I heard Twilight and the rest of the girls scream in conjoined shock. I turned my head in disgust and walked back up the stairs. “Oh no you don't, mister!” Twilight yelled, using her magic to pull me to her. “Where do you think you're going?” Rarity jumped in, “Calling me Fat is one thing, but this time you went too far! How dare you lay a hoof on my Spikey-Wikey!” “He called you fat?” Applejack said, baffled at the thought. “Indeed! This one right here is a lot smarter than you give him credit for.” She stomped her hoof. Twilight gasped, “So Spike was telling the truth when he said YOU did all those horrible things around the house to get him in trouble! I thought Spike was just making up excuses for being irresponsible, but I see I was wrong. You're just downright mean!” She began snorting smoke. “Just wait until we tell Princess Celestia about this!” “No need.” I heard a voice echo. “I heard it all” The crowed turned to see Celestia at the door. She walked past the stunned ponies to meet mr, “I am very disappointed in you, Shifting Sands.” Her gaze pierced me deeper than anyone else' had, but none the less, I kept my expression cemented in anger. But inside I was crying, helplessly, endlessly, pathetically. “I'm sorry to have burdened you all with him” She grieved. Burden. That word, the word that was so heavy on me. It shattered my bones, broke my spirit, defeated me so many times. And now it was back for more. “It's ok Princess, no one could have foreseen this.” Twilight comforted her. “Again, I am sorry, but I am not done with my duties. When I saw the crudely writ I hope one more day will not be too much.” Her glare hardened on me. “Fluttershy is scheduled to take care of him tomorrow, i'm not sure if that's the right choice.” She heavyheartedly rejected her mentors request. Fluttershy began to speak, “Girls, are you sure you should be-” “It's ok Twilight, i'll be there to make sure he doesn't do anything.” Rainbow Dash offered, cutting off the quiet mare. “It's perfectly alright, I can-” She tried again before being cut off by Twilight. “Then it's settled. And for his punishment, since he obviously doesn't like anypony, nopony will deal with him directly.” She said furiously. Celestia began walking out the door, but when she noticed Pedo-Pony, she paused for a second. She then continued her exit. Everyone else soon followed, Twilight sat me down on the bed upstairs and walked out. No one came to check on me, no one came to talk to me, no one. --------------------------- The next day I was sent over to Fluttershy's house, not a single word was uttered to me, even then. Every time Fluttershy tried to speak to me, Rainbow Dash would stare her into silence. I sat on a couch, with all of Fluttershy's animals avoiding me the same way everypony else had. Rainbow Dash had just been sitting in-front of me, stabbing me with her eyes. I began to think to myself, “What do you know, rejected in two worlds. You have no one but yourself to blame. If you had been nice then maybe, just maybe, you could have made some friends.” I sighed, “That's all ruined now, they all think you're a bad seed, and Celestia will probably send you away just so she won't be bothered looking at you.” “Rainbow Dash can you come here a minute? I need help feeding all of the chickens.” Fluttershy called out. “Sure thing!” Rainbow called back, she then looked at me and said, “Don't you dare move from that spot.” then left. “I'm sorry girls, i'm sorry to have been as much a burden here as I was at home.” I sighed once more, “I should do you all a favor and leave” I jumped down from the couch and walked over to the door. I looked up at it wondering how I would get out without making too much noise. That is, until a ferret passed through the doggy door and by me, lifting it's nose in my opposite direction. I walked through the door and made my down the yellow strip of land leading to the gate. I flew over and continued my walk of shame to the entrance of a world that many feared. The place known as 'the Everfree Forest'. I smiled morbidly, thinking of how much happier everyone would be with me gone. With that thought, I ventured into the world of the strong.