//------------------------------//
// Chapter 22: Death Do Us Part Again 
// Story: Aftermath Of The Formal 
// by Shimmeringsun 
//------------------------------//

“Chrys?” Luna suddenly barged into Sunset’s room in a frantic state. “Is everything alright? I woke up and heard Sunset screaming.”

“Nightmare,” Chrysalis replied, she glanced over to Luna with wide worried eyes. ”I… I can't… she won't let me anywhere near her, Lu.” She bit on her thumbnail, standing at the side of Sunset’s bed. 

Luna walked up to Chrysalis, placing her hand on her girlfriend’s shoulder. ”Don’t worry love, I know how to deal with her night terrors.” She consoled Chrysalis. ”You have to give her time.”

Chrysalis quietly and anxiously watched Luna swiftly move to sit on the edge of Sunset’s bed. She placed her hand on top of Sunset’s upper back. She didn't say anything, just allowed her to feel her warmth for a minute.

At Luna’s touch, Sunset’s shoulders tensed. However, after a few seconds, Sunset’s trembling body began to calm down when Luna started to tickle Sunset’s back. Luna smiled when she felt Sunset gradually easing into her. With what little experience she had of being an actual parent, Luna took pride in these special moments between them. Yes, things were hard, she knew that, but moments like these made her heart burst with love for her Sunshine girl. 

With a jerk, Sunset turned herself around and looked up to her guardian. ”L-Luna?” She uttered with a crack in her voice.

Luna's face softened. ”Yes, baby girl, it’s me.” She responded and shifted herself closer. ”You don't need to worry now. You are alright. You were having a nightmare. Chrysalis and I are here now. You do not need to worry.” 

Sunset lifted her hand shakily out of the covers to reach out for Luna. ”Don’t,” She sniffed, ”please, d-don't.” She begged in a small, brittle voice.

Luna grabbed her hand. ”Don't what, sweetheart?” She questioned, sharing a confused look with Chrysalis. 

”Please don’t abandon me too!” Sunset sobbed. With her free hand, she brought the covers up to her chest and slightly trembled against herself.

Luna gently massaged Sunset’s head with her fingers to help soothe her distressed nerve endings. ”Sunset, what on earth are you talking about? I would never abandon you, neither would Chrys.” She asked in a low, worried voice. 

Sunset shot up and shook her head violently. ”Liar! You will!” She rasped out, her voice becoming weaker by the second. “And so will Chrysalis. You both already did.”

For the time being, Chrysalis stood to the side, anxiously biting her nail as she watched Luna care for Sunset. Over the years of knowing Luna, she had never seen her girlfriend act like this before, and in all honesty, she was profound enough to see Luna in a new light. To her surprise, she managed to do what she couldn't, and even though Chrysalis felt a tinge of envy pierce her heart, she couldn't help but feel like she was being lured in by Luna’s love at the same time, bringing warmth to her own being.

Luna quickly glimpsed over to Chrysalis, who looked just as concerned as she did. She knew her girlfriend wanted to help, but was skeptical of interfering. She gave her another reassuring smile and nod, letting her know she could handle this. Chrysalis had enough trust and faith in Luna, so she stayed put for a while longer.

Luna took a calm breath. ”Sunset, talk to us. Whatever you went through, it was bad, wasn't it?” She asked, keeping her worried gaze locked on her.

Sunset slowly nodded her head and allowed a few tears to fall. She bit her lip, unsure whether to say anything else.

Luna was aware of Sunset’s night terrors as it was a regular recurrence, and it was typical she told her about it immediately after. Dreams are fleeting after all. Tonight, however, something was different. Much to Luna’s concern, there was a pregnant pause that Sunset would not end. Instead, she twiddled her thumbs and looked away, glancing sideways at her arms. 

Luna grabbed Sunset’s hand again. ”Honey, do you want to talk about it? I don't want to force you into something you don't feel comfortable with, but you seemed distressed, and we just want to understand so we can help you.” She offered, rubbing Sunset’s hand with her thumb. ”We're worried about you.”

Sunset looked back and forth between Luna and Chrysalis, and then turned her attention to her arm again. Luna had not been this persistent about being with her during a nightmare before. All that could come of telling her was precisely that risk of abandonment by yet another caretaker. Talking never ended well. Speaking is silver, as they say, but silence is golden. Yet here was Luna, about to again insist she tells and not be worried. She was not one to relent peacefully when she was like this, and deep down Sunset knew that she was trying to be there for her, but opening-up about her problems seemed harder than keeping them in. If she would find out she could’ve helped but if she was rejected, there was no telling the consequences.

Inevitably, Luna would find out, yet right now there wasn’t a whole lot to be done. All there was to do was either kick this can down the road or rip off the bandaid.

Clenching her fist, Chrysalis could feel the burning sensation of self-hatred and self-doubt overpowering her soul. She wasn't sure what she could do to stop Sunset from suffering, but she knew she couldn't just stand there any longer than she did. She had to act fast, and so Chrysalis dared herself to sit down next to Sunset and Luna. ”Sunset. I'm noticing you keep looking down at your arm, are you having thoughts about cutting yourself again? Please, don't be ashamed, talk to us, honey.”

Sunset quickly pulled her arm into her stomach. ”I-um…” She looked up to Chrysalis, almost like a little kid who had been caught doing something bad.

Chrysalis opened her hand. ”Take my hand, Sunset, and if you feel the urge to hurt yourself, squeeze mine tighter.”

”I-Im fine, Chrysalis.” Sunset rejected and fidgeted with her arm. ”Honest.” 

Chrysalis sighed in defeat. Luna noticed her girlfriend’s hopeless expression. She placed her hand on Chrysalis’ leg to give her some comfort and nudged her head to encourage Chrysalis to talk to Sunset more.

Chrysalis looked up to Sunset, now with a more meaningful expression. ”Sunset, remember, we’re here for you. Whatever it is that has troubled you, let us deal with it too. You don't need to suffer this alone, okay?” She motivated her with gratitude.

Sunset stared at Chrysalis for a moment before speaking, ”... But, that’s just it, isn't it?” She retorted with grief in her tone. ”I am suffering, and I would rather suffer alone because I'm scared that you two are going to leave me… I shouldn't even be thinking like that, but everyone in my life has left me, and I can't help but think you two are going to the same. It's always been that way.”

Luna put her trembling hand up to her mouth to prevent a gasp from escaping. ”Sunset,” She began with a slight hiccup, ”I know you didn't have an easy past, and hearing this might not help at all, but Chrysalis and I have no intention of ever leaving you. We care about you too much to let you go. I will be honest, I'm terrified to let you go. It seems silly and a little selfish, I know, but I am, and I worry about that every day. It’s why I had Chrysalis get us those adoption papers.” Luna looked to Chrysalis in gratitude. On the nightstand however, she noticed the stack of papers had remained untouched. ”I know one day you will have to leave, and I have to let you go into that big bad world out there. It will break my heart, but even if you leave for college or whatever, I will still be here to welcome you back home. It doesn't matter how old you are. I will always be ready to welcome you back with open arms.” She placed her hand over where her heart is. ”I can assure you, that is a forever promise, my child. You have a home now, with us.”

Sunset shook her head in disbelief. ”In the nightmare…” She took a deep breath to steady herself. ”I was a filly again, and I was back in Equestria… I was looking for my birth mother… trying to search for her, and I was going to ask her to take me back, to help me escape from my father, but when I found her...” Sunset sniffed. ”It turned out to be you…” She scampered away from Chrysalis and Luna, brought her knees up to her chest, and huddled on the edge of her bed. She rocked herself back and forth, as though saying that aloud disturbed her whole being. The itch at her arm became more inflamed than it was before, and Sunset couldn't take it anymore. She was desperate for that blade now. 

After hearing what Sunset admitted, Luna let a tear fall. “Sunset, what happened? What did I say?” She asked as she caught her breath. 

Sunset looked at Luna with disgust before turning to face the other side of her room. “... You denied me and told me you regretted taking me in. That helping me was the worst mistake you made in your life. You even said that you wished you left me to rot on the streets, to be abused by anypony that walked past.” She choked on her words and paused for a moment. ”... How could you?”

Luna quickly and on instinct pulled Sunset in for a warm embrace. ”Oh, no, no, no, baby girl.” She placed her hand on Sunset’s head, burying her face into her shoulder. ”You know -” She was about to continue, but Sunset pushed her away and cut her off.

”Baby girl?” She scoffed. ”How can I be your ’baby girl’?'' She cried and looked at Luna and Chrysalis. A deep shadow of doubt poured from her soul and was cast on her saviours. “You know what the funny thing is? That wasn’t even the worst of it!” Sunset gulped and balled her fists. ”You said any mother would’ve been better off carving out her own uterus with a rusty coat hanger than being my mother. So, please, tell me, how am I your baby girl? What's so special about me? I mean nothing to you!”

Chrysalis almost threw up in her mouth at the visual, finding it difficult to keep her composure. “Holy crap, Sunset!” She thought to herself with a slight gag. “What the hell!”

”Sunset…” Luna tried to reach out for her again, but Sunset recoiled back.

”I’m not finished yet.” Sunset sneered, causing Luna to clamp up. ”... You then went on to tell me all I would ever do was suffer, and be a waste of breath to everyone around me.” She chuckled like the one who told her as much, almost cackling, before falling into silence. After a moment, she looked at Luna and took in her shocked expression. “And here we are exactly as foretold,” she smiled almost triumphantly through her tears, “with you both losing sleep and wasting your breath on my worthless life!” She turned to Chrysalis, who was about to speak up. “You!” She pointed, breaking Chrysalis’ train of thought. “You shut it! You said it yourself! Unsure of if you’d done the right thing! It would’ve all just been the same had you given it a second thought. You could’ve just brought a mop to clean me off the sidewalk! It would be all the same to you!”

Lost for words, and having a point she thought resolved be brought up to her in such an unfair and unforgiving manner, Chrysalis felt her hand was forced. She pursed her lips together, and lifted her hand in the air. Before Chrysalis could strike, however, Luna managed to firmly and instinctively catch Chrysalis’ swinging wrist from doing any harm.

They briefly exchanged a look, and Chrysalis took note of Luna’s intense deadly glare. ”Lay one finger on her, Chrysalis…” Luna growled with all the anger she could muster, like a bear protecting her cubs. ”Or I’ll end you. I mean it.”

Realizing her last option had been taken, Chrysalis got up with a rush; her anger righteous and flaring at Sunset. “You think this is my first rodeo, you little snot-nosed brat?! If that’s the worst you’ve got then I’ve got news for you, you scum sucker!” Chrysalis scowled at Sunset. “I’ve had worse. So much worse!” She paused her gaze at Luna. “So much worse.” She turned back to Sunset. ”And I can dish it out all the same!” Her lips were trembling but she pulled them stiff in split seconds. “But at least I’m decent enough to never put you through losing a loved one!”

She got up, turned around, and headed towards the door.

“Where do you think you are going?” Luna asked, standing up from Sunset’s bed. She had tried to put some indignation in her voice, but all she got was a plea she did not mean.

Chrysalis opened the door and turned, just to briefly stand in the doorway. She looked at the miscreants and scoffed. “You two really deserve each other. My god do you ever.” Again, she turned away and started slowly closing the door. “If you need me… HA! Who am I kidding!” And with a click, the door had shut.

It rattled from a loud bang on the wall, followed by a slamming door and the shatter of glass hitting the floor. 

Luna almost jumped out of her skin when the last clunk rang in her ears. She knew where Chrysalis went, and by the sound of the door, she knew Chrysalis was no longer in the apartment. Panic rose within, and Luna felt the urge to go after her. Yet, she had to stop herself. Whatever Chrysalis was going through, Luna hoped that their issue could be resolved and she would be safe. For now, she had to focus on Sunset who needed her more. Sunset was more important than her own feelings. 

Shaken up from Chrysalis’ harsh words (as well as her own), Sunset had curled herself up into a ball. Quietly sobbing into her knees. 

Full of concern, Luna turned her attention to Sunset after she managed to bring herself back to reality. She sat down on the bed and wrapped her arms around her teen. ”Sunset…” She softly stroked Sunset’s hair.

The teenager opened her eyes and stared at Luna. Her gaze was wide and was blurred by tears. ”I’m sorry.” She said with a frog in her throat. ”Please, don't leave too.”

Luna smiled sadly at Sunset. It was evident she needed comforting. However, after what Luna had just witnessed, she was conflicted to even address the fact Sunset had disrespected Chrysalis in such a harsh and unfair manner. She wanted nothing more than to be there for her, hold her, and make everything better. Deep down, she knew that this was one of those times she had to be Sunset’s parent instead of being her friend or her Vice-Principal.

”I’m not going anywhere, Sunset…” Luna spoke in a firm yet understanding voice. ”I’m staying right here with you, but we do need to discuss what you just said. I know you are upset and confused, and that is okay, but the way you spoke to Chrysalis was not okay. Nor the way you spoke to me. Words hurt Sunset, even if you don't mean them, they cut deep, and they will stay with you. I understand you want to lash out, and it is even more understandable you want to take it out on Chrysalis because she saved you. But you need to understand her side too. Now, I don't agree with what Chrysalis did, and she shouldn't have called you those things either. It was downright nasty, and I am furious at her for the way she handled things tonight, but you need to learn to be sure to taste your words before you spit them out. Otherwise, you will only realize when it's too late. Telling Chrysalis to ’shut it’ was ill-mannered, and I don't want to raise you as someone who thinks saying that is okay. For your behaviour tonight, you will be writing up a one thousand words apology letter to Chrysalis, and if I don't think it’s sincere enough, I will be making you write it out again. So you will need to really think about what you have done before putting it onto paper.” 

Sunset narrowed her eyes. ”What? How’s that fair? Chrysalis is the one who tried to slap me, yet I get punished? I have other homework to do you know!” 

Luna inhaled a steady breath, trying to stop her temper from rising any more than it did. She put her hand up to hush Sunset. ”I’m not punishing you, Sunset. I'm disciplining you. You need to understand that your actions were wrong, and we need to correct those actions so you know you won't do it again. And as for your homework, you have all the time in the world here at home now that you don’t go to school for the time being. Plus,” Luna placed her hand on Sunset’s head, ”you’re one of our top students. I’m sure you can handle it. Now, I will be fair and I will give you two days to write up your letter, then you will give it to Chrysalis. You can do this at the kitchen table with me being present.”

Sunset huffed in frustration. ”No surprises there.” She mumbled under her breath.

”What was that, Sunset?” Luna asked, frowning. 

Sunset turned to her with a glare. ”I said ’no surprises there.’”

Luna lowered her head to sternly look at Sunset. ”And what is that supposed to mean?” 

Sunset rolled her eyes. ”Oh, let me guess?” She put her finger on her chin in thought. ”Maybe it's because for the past two days you have been acting like my own personal bodyguard! Heck, I'm not even allowed to go to the toilet without you following me! You're treating me like a prisoner, Luna! Yet, you keep saying ’this is your home, Sunset’ or ’I want you to be comfortable, Sunset’ but, do you have any idea what you're doing? It's almost like you're trying to control me so you can turn me into your precious little daughter! Well, reality check, I'm not your daughter, and you're not my mother! You could never be my mother! My cynicism might be a poor cover, but I can see you're too kind to be my Mom. You're too loving. You don't even compare.”

Listening to Sunset’s rant, Luna winced at Sunset’s last words. Her eyes were frozen over, like the surface of a winter puddle, robbing them from their usual motherly warmth. A sharp pain pierced her heart, but most of all, she was taken by surprise. Realization kicked in, and Luna could see she was looking into eyes she had herself a long time ago. It sent a chill up her spine. 

Luna firmly grabbed Sunset’s arms and stared deeply into her teal eyes. ”Sunset! That is enough!” She raised her voice with authority. ”You are on very thin ice right now, young lady, so I would watch your tone when you're speaking to me. All I'm doing is trying to help you.” She briefly paused to let Sunset know she was serious. 

Sunset looked down when she noticed Luna’s stern eyes.

Luna lifted her chin up. ”Now, I want you to listen to me, and I want you to listen carefully. I do care about you. Do you honestly think I would be here right now if I didn't? I could walk away, and I could turn your over to the authorities, or I could put you in foster care, and leave you with strangers, but I'm not doing that because I care about you. You have to understand, the things I do for you is out of love and care for you. Do you really think I would've given anyone my old leather jacket when it meant so much to me? Or do you think that I would adopt any teenager for the sake of it? Especially someone who's supposed to be my student? Heck, who even adopts teenagers at all? And I act as your bodyguard to keep you safe so you don't try to kill yourself again!” She yelled in Sunset’s face, loud enough that it echoed in the room.

Seeing the fear in Sunset’s eyes, and how her bottom lip started to quiver, Luna quickly took in a breath to relax her temper. 

”Sunset, please forgive me for raising my voice.” Luna cleared her throat. ”God, what was I thinking? I have probably woken up half the neighborhood by now.” She massaged her temples. ”I’m supposed to be an adult, and yet here I am, yelling in your face. Like that solves anything.” She smirked slightly, then continued to talk calmly.

‘Maybe we do deserve each other,’ Sunset thought quietly when Luna was talking.

”Regardless of us yelling, you must understand that what I'm doing is for your best interest. I don't want to imagine what could have happened if I hadn't taken you in. All I want to do is to protect you and make sure you are safe. I'm afraid, Sunset, because I don't want to lose you, and I apologize if I have been too much. I have never done this before. I know I am not the greatest parent in the world, but this is all I’ve got.” She motioned a hand to herself. ”I know you're hurting, and I know you feel angry, but pushing people away isn't going to help your case. I want to help you, and so does Chrysalis. Yelling and being unkind isn't going to get you anywhere. I mean, look what happened tonight, you pushed Chrysalis away, and you are trying to do the same to me. I don't want you to end up alone again, Sunset, and I don't want you to ruin your relationship with me or Chrysalis. We both love you, and we have sacrificed a lot for you. I know that Chrysalis has hurt you by saying she wasn’t sure if she did the right thing, but was it right of you to be hurtful back? I’m not dismissing your feelings, I just want you to think about what you said. Really think about it. Then, you can put it in your letter, and a verbal apology to Chrysalis would be nice too.”

”Luna, I-I didn't mean to.” Sunset wailed into herself. ”See! This is what I mean.” She threw her hand up in the air. ”I just drove you and Chrysalis away! And now, who knows if you two are going to stay together. Maybe, I don’t deserve to be happy… to live. All I’ll ever do is make everyone around me miserable! No wonder my birth mother or Princess Celestia didn't want to be around me… No one ever does.”

“Sunset Shimmer, look at me.” Luna said in a sharp voice.

Sunset flinched at hearing her full name being used. She turned to Luna and braced herself. 

Luna raised her finger in the air. ”Let me say this first, and let me be exceedingly clear: You do deserve a chance to pursue your happiness.” She said, much softer this time. ”It is not your fault that there have been people in your life who have made you feel worthless, and I'm sorry you had to deal with that, and it is not your fault that you feel this way. You are so important to me, and in my eyes, you are worth the world. You aren't what you feel, Sunset. You are so much more than that. So much more.” She used her thumb to wipe Sunset’s eyes and smiled so purely and vibrantly at Sunset, tears filling up her own eyes. ”I know you have been through a lot of pain, you made mistakes, and maybe that is why you feel like you don’t deserve to be happy, but you should know that your past isn't today, and it isn’t your future. You need to think about why you feel like you don't deserve to be happy. Ask yourself what you have gone through from the beginning when you started feeling this kind of way. If the answer is ”for all my life” then let's just ask, ’when did it get worse?’ And more importantly, ‘When did it get better?’ Once you have figured that out, we can spot what thoughts make you feel so miserable. A pattern has been set in your mind, Sunset, and you have to break it. You need to acknowledge your accomplishments, start doing things for yourself, and practice talking positively about yourself. You can recondition yourself. You need to break the cycle.”

Sunset wrapped her arms around herself, and her face slid into a look of despair. ”What if I can't, Luna? What if this is just my life forever?”

Luna grabbed Sunset’s hands. ”It won't be like this forever.” She softly replied. ”I cannot say whether things will get better if we change, but I can say they must change if they are to get better. You need to stop pushing people away, Sunset. It is okay to allow your heart to love, and it is okay to want to feel loved. I am not so sure if ’deserving to be loved’ is the right phrase, I know I feel like I don't deserve love, but it is not about what I deserve. It is what I need, and it is what you need. Everyone always needs someone, even if they don't want to admit it. I know that I really need you, Chrysalis, and Celestia, and we all want to give you a chance. A chance to be happy. You say you are broken, and that you are hurt, and that can be okay, I too sometimes feel that way, but I know as long as I have you three, I can allow myself some happiness. And that is what I wish I can give you. If you want to be free, you must learn how to let go. Release your hurt. Release your fears. But, most of all, refuse to entertain the old pain. If you can do that, you can finally be happy.” 

Sunset refused to look away, even though her lips were trembling, and her shoulders began to heave with emotion, almost as if she couldn't control it. Her lashes brimmed with heavy tears, and all she could see was a blurred vision of her guardian. ”I-I’m scared, Luna...” She wept. ”... I’m so scared.”

”What for, sweetheart?” Luna asked with a gulp of worry, shifting closer to Sunset.

Sunset fidgeting with her bedsheets. ”I think I’m scared to be happy because every time I do get happy, something always goes wrong. I'm always left feeling hurt, and I'm afraid to let people in because everyone leaves. Either way, I end up alone.” 

”You are safe with me, Sunset. I promise.” Luna said with genuine affection in her eyes. She wrapped her arm around Sunset, allowing her to cuddle into her chest. ”I know you are scared, but you can look me in the eyes, hold me a little tighter, and smile. Because I'm not going anywhere. I’m not going to leave you like others have done to you. I'm here to stay, even if you try to push me away. I won't budge. If we share one thing in common, it is our stubbornness, and I can assure you, no matter what you do, even if you mess up, and even if I get angry or upset, that doesn't mean I'm going to leave or love you any less. One of the reasons why I want to adopt you is to show how ready I am to be your parent for life, and to show you some sustainability. You need someone in your life who you can count on, someone who is able to provide for you, and someone who is there for you emotionally. I want to be that person, Sunset. You are not alone in this.”

Sunset gave Luna a look of uncertainty. ”How can I trust you?”

”By trusting me enough to let me show you I'm not leaving.” Luna gently nudged Sunset. ”If we're in this together, then you can trust me to be honest to tell you I'm not leaving. But, if we're not in this together, you can't trust me to be honest to tell you I'm not leaving. So, what do you say? Can you trust me enough to trust you?”

Sunset considered her thoughts for a minute. ”If you trust me, then I'll try and trust you.” 

”Sunset, could you elaborate on what you just said?” Luna asked, raising her eyebrow. 

”Isn't it obvious?” Sunset looked at Luna, dead on. ”You don't trust me. So how can you ask me to trust you when you don't even trust me to be alone?”

Luna sighed. ”You're right, I don't trust you.” She said with some seriousness. ”But, as I said before, I'm scared to leave you alone because I don't want to put you at risk again. I can't lose you, Sunset. I just can't…” She said with slight tears in her eyes.

”How can I get you to trust me again?” Sunset dared herself that question.

”Maybe we can look into coming up with a plan which suits us both. I know I have been too much, Sunset, but if you show me I can trust you, then I’ll think about lifting the restrictions.” Luna replied.

”Really? You'll think about it?” Sunset asked with hopeful eyes.

Nodding, Luna spoke in a serious tone: ”Yes, but you have to prove to me that I can trust you, and if you break those rules, we will just be back at square one. We need to have faith in each other for this work.” 

Sunset thought for another moment. ”I think… I think I'm willing to try.” 

Luna leaned forward to place a kiss on Sunset’s forehead. ”And so I am.” She said. ”We’ll get through this, Sunset. One step at a time, as long as we have each other we’ll get there. I'm always going to be here for you.”

Sunset found a smile through her tears. ”Thank you, and I'm sorry for waking you, and for what I said to you and Chrysalis.”

”I know, but we can worry about that tomorrow.” Luna said in a motherly voice. ”It's time you get some rest.” She was quick to urge, and began pulling the covers back up to tuck Sunset and herself in. ”I will be here when you wake up.” 

”Do you promise?” Sunset pleaded, looking at Luna with childlike eyes. 

”I promise.” And with that, Luna looked down to her bundle of joy and gave Sunset one last kiss on the cheek. 

After a moment of silence, Sunset opened her eyes once more. ”Luna?” 

”Hm?” Luna turned her head to face Sunset.

”Why hasn't Chrysalis come back yet?” Sunset asked.

Luna gave Sunset’s shoulders another squeeze. ”Oh, you can talk to Chrysalis again tomorrow. Just go back to sleep. You’re alright now. I’ll keep the nightmares away.” She cooed softly and caressed Sunset’s face with her hand. Soon enough, Sunset began to close her eyes again and drifted off in Luna’s loving embrace, feeling at peace and content there.

Luna sighed and bit her lip. ”I hope you are alright, Chrysi.” She said to no one but herself, looking out into the distance towards Sunset’s window. ”Wherever you are.”





“Miss?” The bartender began, “I would like to close down for tonight.”

Chrysalis stirred, and raised her head from lying on her elbows. She had been like that for long enough to leave prints of the creases in her clothes on her face. She grumbled something in what may have been an affirmative.

“Are you okay ma’am?” He asked with some concern.

“Do.. Do I look like a madam to you?... Goo, good sirs?” Chrysalis slurred. “I’m barely, barely even a miss. I think.” She checked her fingers. “See? No ring. I am not a missus.” She winked at the bartender. “Yet.”

The bartender raised his hand to show the ring on his ring finger.

“Not you!” Chrysalis growled, “My girlfriend. If she’ll have me after … Actually, never mind. She’s the reason I’m here in the first place.”

The barkeep sighed. Another soul to drown. He knew there was no salvation in a baptism of alcohol, although many found themselves reborn at the bottom of a pitcher. He saw his last patron was slouching in the underworld and took pity. Back he went behind the bar, and poured her a glass of water. “Pray tell,” he inquired. The least he could do was patch her up a little. After all, the best customer is a recurrent customer, and she can’t recur if something were to happen after walking out that door.

Chrysalis turned to look at him, and after a few seconds, felt her lips and chin had begun to quiver at the prospect of the least bit of catharsis. She sniffled once.

“I’m… I'm not sure where to begin,” she said with a mumble. “I’m sorry I’m such a mess.”

The barkeeper shoved the glass of water towards her, and she eagerly drank it halfway down.

“Thank you, and thank you… thank you for listening,” Chrysalis said. “I didn’t even realize no one ever...” She completely choked up. She was mouthing something, but the sounds would not come forth.

She felt a warm and gentle touch from a hand, lifting weight off her shoulders. “No one ever bothers?”

Chrysalis nodded, looking away.

“No wonder you’re here,” he said. He noticed she looked a little better with some water in her, though she could use another glass after this one. He thought it was best to keep her for a few more minutes. “You’re not on a fun night out. What are you getting away from?”

Chrysalis shook her head. “I met a part of my past today that I thought I’d left behind, that I thought I’d gotten over and could handle. How wrong I was,” she said, shaking her head again.

“Sounds rough,” the barkeeper replied with sympathy.

“May I ask a personal question?” Chrysalis asked without waiting for an answer. “Have you lost any loved ones?” She put up her index finger and took another gulp of water. “Actually, different question. Have you ever have … had, have you ever had a loved one who tried to… You know...” She gestured hanging.

The bartender inhaled deeply through his nose. He poured himself the last of a whiskey bottle. “I have been very fortunate.”

“A long time ago, ...” Chrysalis told the bartender about the time she went fishing for pills down Luna’s throat, and about the bountiful catch she had that day. She continued on about how she had gotten her broken arm. How history may not repeat, but it surely rhymes.

“And then she had the gall to just... ” Chrysalis pounded the bar with a fist, her teeth grit and bared. “And I am done with it. I love them, because they’re who I had left behind long ago. But I have changed. I am done. They don’t want to live with me anyway, so good riddance. They might as well be dead to me now. That’s how things would’ve been had I not foolishly butted in, that’s as well as things should be now.”

There was a moment’s pause. Chrysalis chuckled. “No more Luna, imagine that,” she said with a sigh. “I’ve been by myself before I got back with Luna but...” She looked at her hand and up her arms. “This is different.” She rolled her shoulders around and stretched her neck. She chuckled again. She held her breath before she spoke again. “Y-Yeah…” She nervously looked around the room before she proceeded. ”F-Fuck … F-Fuck Luna...” The room remained silent as she waited for the gods to strike her down, yet nothing happened. Briefly, her pupils were no bigger than a pin prick, and host to no fewer angels dancing in it. ”Fuck you! Fuck you, Luna! Fuck you! And fuck you, Sunset! I’m free! I’m never gonna fucking deal with that again! Fuck your shit! Not my problem!”

Her bout of joy lasted a few minutes. The barkeep had scooted back a little and sat there, onlooking the spectacle, the tirade, of a woman who’d taken a leap in reclaiming her life from a past she had held on to all too desperately. It had been worth keeping the place running a few more minutes.

Chrysalis suddenly turned to the barkeeper, her eyes wide open, bright and radiant, and a smile she hadn’t donned in ages. Her spirit had been lifted beyond her body and had found a place of sobriety, clarity, grace, gratitude and liberation, all adding gravity to her next few words.

“Thank you,” she said. “For listening. I needed that.”
Carefully Chrysalis leaned into the barkeep and hugged him. “Thanks, for setting me free.”

“Well shucks,” the barkeep replied. “You’re welcome. It was the least I could do for someone who drank so much I can afford to go on a second holiday.”

Just as he mentioned the very fact, Chrysalis felt the alcohol still coursing around her body. Chrysalis got up with a minor stumble and turned towards an exit. She bent her leg a few times. “Sorry, just a sec. My leg’s already asleep.” She tapped her foot on the floor and tried to put some weight on it. There was a numbness, a delay between what she was doing and seeing, but not anything unfamiliar. “I’ll be fine,” she said, as though anyone had asked.

After a few moments, Chrysalis was on the sidewalk, leaning on the wall behind her. She dug into her pocket to grab her phone. Using her thumb to unlock it, she noticed that she had no missed calls or even a text from either Luna or Sunset. She turned it off.

”Fucking... Luna,” Chrysalis scoffed to herself. Pocketing her phone again, she decided to fetch a cigarette from her bag. Once lit, she inhaled a draw. ”Well, it looks like they're not waiting for me after all. See if Celestia is any different.” She thought for a minute, taking another draw. ”...I think… Probably anyway.” She shrugged. ”Not like Lu’s gonna care.” She mumbled. ”Yeah… Let's go visit the never-MILF… Well, drop the ‘M’ anyway,” she said with a sly look. ”She’s some kind of ILF, and I’m back in the sea baby! Yeah!”

When decided, Chrysalis put out her cigarette on the ground and began her stroll to Celestia’s house. For the second time this week, it was another cold night in Canterlot city. The sky was clear and dark with a new moon. The usual lively neighborhood was deadly quiet, and there was not one person in sight. Well, apart from the drunk who was staggering along the sidewalk. The air around Chrysalis was so cold, that with every breath she took, she began to shiver more. Whatever residual of warmth she absorbed in the bar was now gone. Her lips began to turn purple, and her teeth to gently chatter, though she hardly cared. She was on a mission, and that mission was to get to Celestia’s as soon as possible. Wrapping her thin coat around herself tighter, Chrysalis was determined to reach her destination. 

Finally, somehow, Chrysalis managed to make it to Celestia’s front porch. Grinning at her accomplishment, she walked forward to the finish line. However, she soon noticed that Celestia had all her lights turned off. Chrysalis peeked in the first window nearest to the door, then moved to bang on the entrance, but there wasn't an answer. So, she did it again, much louder this time. 

”Yo! Tia! Open up!” Chrysalis called, still banging on the door. Yet, she got nothing.

Huffing, and feeling slightly nauseous from all the alcohol, Chrysalis turned around to sit down on the steps for a second, trying to regain whatever composure she had left. She placed her hand on her chin and rocked herself back and forth to keep her mind off from heaving. A few moments later, the door opened to reveal Celestia.

She looked down to notice teal hair. ”Chrysalis? I thought I heard you shouting. What are you doing here?” She yawned, wrapping her dressing gown around herself tighter after she felt the cold wind hit her body. ”It’s past midnight. Why are you not at home with Luna and Sunset? You know, your family.”

Chrysalis turned around. ”Ah, hey there, cutie pie. You finally decided to answer.” She stumbled up with a glare in her eye at the sudden mention of Luna and Sunset. ”Oh, them?” She laughed slightly. ”They’re not my family.”

Celestia grabbed onto her. She looked at her with confusion, but before she could ask anything, an unpleasant smell flared up her nostrils. Celestia instantly recognized it. She almost gagged. ”You reek of smoke. I thought you quit years ago?”

”Old habits die hard, Tia.” Chrysalis rifted. She dug into her purse to pull another cigarette out. Putting it in her mouth, she tried to light it but her wide eyes met Celestia’s stern ones. ”Oh, my bad. Want one?” She asked, opening up the cigarette package. ”Ah. Shoot. None left.” She whined. 

”Ugh, give me that.” Celestia scolded, snatching the cigarette and empty packet from Chrysalis. 

”Hey! That was the only good thing I had left!” Chrysalis almost growled, trying to reach out for her possessions. Celestia stood back and held the packet in the air.

”Chrysalis, how much have you had to drink?” Celestia frowned in disapproval and tried to stop Chrysalis from swaying side to side.

Chrysalis chuckled darkly. ”Heh, wanna find out?” She scooted closer to Celestia. ”Betcha… Bet… I will bet you…” Chrysalis pressed a finger on Celestia’s chest to emphasize the point. ”That you could tell me how much I've had if…” She said, raising the same finger between them. ”If you pretend to be my breathalyzer.” She stammered. She let herself tip over into Celestia, who was fortunate enough to bump into a wall. Chrysalis pursued her advance, scooting up along Celestia’s slanted body. Her lips were drawing closer to Celestia’s. 

Celestia could feel her body heat through their clothes. She managed to squeeze her arm between them and push back on Chrysalis' shoulders. "Beep beep beep! It's so high I can get drunk just inhaling your breath."

”Oh, come on, Tia. I bet… I bet you want a taste.” Chrysalis attempted to wink seductively. ”Your little sister thinks I'm sweet as pie... I bet you would too.” She used her finger to poke Celestia’s shoulder.

“Alright, get in bed.” Celestia winked. ”I’ll be with you in a minute,” She said with a smirk.

There was a pause, during which Chrysalis first blinked left, then right, and then both eyes together as she should. She took a step back and her face flushed red from either the alcohol, surprise, or Celestia’s unexpected reciprocation.

For about five very shallow breaths and thirty-ish rapid heartbeats the bewildered drunk looked around, finding the porch abandoned. Same as the sidewalk and the street. She turned back to Celestia. “I… I uh... ” She looked Celestia in the eyes and didn’t notice the tinge of guilt she faced. Her breathing had slowed down, and she almost sighed. ”Actually, I wouldn’t mind, for different reasons...”

“Come on in. I have a guest bedroom,” Celestia said. “Get in bed and I’ll be with you in a minute.” She smiled, that smile Chrysalis knew Luna would find hard to come by. Gracious, welcoming, forgiving and understanding. “For different reasons.”

Once inside, Celestia guided Chrysalis to the guest room and pointed out the bed. She prepared some tea and came back to find Chrysalis sat down on the couch instead. Celestia placed her tray with tea down on the coffee table and passed Chrysalis her cup.

Chrysalis checked out her surroundings, not really sure of what to make of it. The bed seemed a little on the short end, if only by a little. It was already made and dust free. The mattress was thick and fancy and brand new from the smell and feel of it.

The wallpaper was frilly and dyed with red and yellow pastels. There was a desk with a chair near the window next to an empty bookcase. Facing the other end against the back wall, there was an empty closet next to a dresser.

The ticking of an analogue clock drew Chrysalis’ attention. A little past midnight. Below the clock, across the door, hung a set of picture frames: one of which had a picture of a young Celestia, and another few which showed a progression of a young Luna growing up. There was a photo at the end, featuring both Luna and Celestia beaming with pride and joy. A deep scowl formed on Chrysalis’ face. She turned away, unable to look at them any longer than she had. Her attention went back to other things in the room.

What stood out most was that the whole room was all tidy, free of dust and well prepared, as though Celestia had expected guests. There hung a very faint and very familiar smell in the room she could not quite place. It was very nostalgic, and a sense of dejavu befell the drunkard.

Chrysalis, in a downer drunken moment, looked to herself and reflected. “Huh, so this is the big surprise Luna keeps going on about,” Chrysalis said. ”Well, I hope I’m not grimeing up the room. You must be getting some really special guests soon.”

“Yes, and here you are!” Celestia said. She put a hand on Chrysalis’ shoulder. ”Now, are you going to tell me why I found you sitting on my front porch, completely hammered?” She asked. ”You know, I would expect this sort of behavior from a teenager, not a thirty-five-year-old mother-to-be.” 

“Actually, I was just curious to see how you’d handle a little flirting.” Chrysalis took a sip of her hot beverage.

“Chrysalis, surely you know I am not that kind of woman.” Celestia noticed Chrysalis had yet to swallow. She smirked. “I like a good cervix-bruising tonsil-tickling penis.”

Chrysalis, unexpectedly, did in fact not choke on her drink. Instead, she calmly swallowed and contemplatively placed her mug on the table. She turned to Celestia with as serious a face as the alcohol could permit her and queried: “But so if I had one… wanna check?”

“Knowing you, you’d probably keep it in a freezer.” Celestia said.

“It’s the only way to keep ‘em hard,” Chrysalis said. She leaned in to Celestia to whisper in her ears, “I call them … cocksickles.” She snickered, chuckled, and then burst out laughing at her own drunk jokes.

Celestia didn’t budge. “Anyway, I wouldn’t do that to my sister. And frankly, I know this is all just in jest but your inebriation doesn’t really help your case.”

“Beep beep beep?” Chrysalis repeated with a smirk, poking Celestia’s shoulder.

Celestia gave Chrysalis a confused look.

“You have no idea what a breathalyzer sounds like, do you?” Chrysalis asked.

“No clue,” Celestia said, puzzled. 

“Well, If you pout your lips and close your eyes, we can try and make that sound together.”

“You’re a terrible flirt,” Celestia said discouragingly. “If you’re that wanting, go back to Luna.” Celestia smiled. “I didn’t bring you back together for nothing after all.”

“I’m… I’m not so sure about that...” Chrysalis sighed and looked down. ”No. Yeah… About that… I stormed out of the house earlier. I’m not with Luna anymore and if she wanted me she would’ve called or sought me out. I walked out on her and Sunset after she…” Chrysalis leaned forward and held her head, the mix of alcohol and frustration not sitting well. ”I may have burnt a bridge too many.”

”What? Why?” Celestia asked, almost choking on her drink. ”What happened?”

“I would’ve slapped Sunset had Luna not stopped me,” Chrysalis admitted, looking down to her wrist. “But then, I suppose by that time they had already burnt their end of the bridge.”

”She must’ve said something pretty awful to push you that far,” Celestia said with some concern and surprise. “Was there no way to… you know, make amends or something?”

Chrysalis winced. ”Celestia, no offense, but I'm not exactly in the best mood to talk about it. I feel awful about i-... I feel relieved, actually. My body is just in poor shape.” She straightened her back. ”I’m tired, I ache, and I don't want to waste my breath on them. I've done enough tonight.”

Celestia sighed softly. ”I understand. Just drink your tea and get some rest for now. If you want some aspirin, don’t hesitate to ask. I will text Luna to let her know you are safe.” She said, getting up from the couch. 

Before Celestia could move any further, Chrysalis spoke up, briefly having sobered up enough to have a serious conversation. ”Don't bother, Celestia,” Chrysalis said, dismissing her. ”She doesn't care.”

”Why would you think that?” Celestia asked, frowning. 

”I would know,” Chrysalis started. ”She would’ve chased after me when I left, or at least called when she is done tending to Sunset tonight.” Chrysalis showed her phone, and all Celestia could see was a blank lock screen. “She hasn’t done either, knowing I’ll be well awake for a while since I’m out. She doesn’t care, and that might be for the better.”

”You don't mean all of that, Chrysalis.” Celestia stepped in further. ”Luna loves you, and I know you love her.”

Chrysalis scoffed. ”She doesn’t know the meaning of the word!!” Chrysalis turned to Celestia, with tears in her eyes, “You don’t kill yourself when you love someone! You let them know you want to be with them, always, COME WHAT MAY!!”

Panting, inhaling deeply between outbursts, she continued. “Do you have any idea what I’ve been through with that woman?! That brat?! All the times she’s tried to undermine me just so she could have me! Never looking at any sort of bigger picture! I wasn’t her world! SHE WAS!” She held her hand in her hair, almost tugging it. The maniacal snarl on her face, the upper lip baring her teeth, and the hiss pushed through them as she looked to Celestia, all amounted to shivers down the serene woman’s spine. “She is so god damn self-absorbed in her own little fantasy world, it’s unreal. Tonight, I finally woke up to that. She. Doesn’t. Care.” She sucked in another breath.

Afraid to speak up, Celestia looked to her guest with pouted lips and furrowed brows. She expected the tirade to continue after Chrysalis found some more words, troublesome as it looked to be for her. She wanted to know what then Chrysalis meant by that. What does it mean to care if it is not what Luna is doing to her?

“I’ll tell you,” Chrysalis spat. “Caring is something you do. You walk that walk and that’s it! No talking. There is no talk to be walked. Not for love. Not even ‘I love you’ or ’You mean the world to me’. Luna’s words have lost all meaning, knowing the shit she put me through. After all I’ve done for her without reward! All that… just the housekeeping alone, always picking up her messes! Every time she wanted something from the store, even in the dead of night in a god damn blizzard! Every meal I cooked for her she’d rather have been poison, Celestia! And I would know!” She pounded her chest. “I KNOW! I know because she’d rather be dead than be with me!” She sighed. ”We are done, Celestia. I am free. I am fucking done with it. She can go eat dirt and push up daisies for all I care.”

Celestia moved to sit down again. She placed her hand on Chrysalis’ shoulder. ”Look, Chrysalis, I don't know fully what you and Luna are going through right now, but what I will do is take you home tomorrow, and from there, we can work things out. You shouldn't leave each other on bad terms. You have too much history, and good memories together that I know that this will break the both of you, somehow. And it is not only that, you both have someone else to think about too, and whether Sunset admits to it or not, I know deep down, that girl needs you. Both of you.”

Chrysalis put her hand in the ends of Celestia’s hair and played with it a little, slowly moving her hand up the length of it. “I don’t think you understand how through we really are,” she said, “and I’m sorry, I hope you can forgive me.”

“I… I’m not su-” Celestia started briefly. She felt her head suddenly janked towards Chrysalis’, moved by the latter’s hand behind her head. It took a moment for her to sense a warm soft touch on her lips. There was a wicked taste of alcohol and tobacco. Another moment later she came to realize they were Chrysalis’ lips upon hers. It had happened so quickly, and so taken her by surprise that no sooner than 7 whole seconds later - count them - did it sink in. By that time, their lips had already parted long since, relatively speaking.

Chrysalis sat beside Celestia, and looked on at the quiet creeping chaos developing before her. “I hope you can forgive me,” Chrysalis repeated.

Celestia said nothing. She didn’t move and turned only her eyes towards the stranger sitting beside her. She put one hand on Chrysalis’ knee and got up.

“Excuse me for a moment,” Celestia said. She calmly walked out of the bedroom. The sound of footsteps faded out down the hallway. Pressure in the water pipes clanked them, and Chrysalis heard water flowing, a glass filling up and tooth brushing sounds. There was a splash and more water running, followed by a sniffle and a full on sob. The footsteps grew louder again, and Celestia stepped back into the room.

Chrysalis had never seen a face like this before. Before her stood a violated individual, but one not without compassion and understanding, nor without ego, self interests and a strong sense of justice. Chrysalis had wanted to say she’s sorry, but knew she would be soon enough.

“I want you out, Chrysalis!” Celestia said harshly. Chrysalis got up, but was pushed down hard by Celestia. “Sit!” She hissed. Chrysalis looked up at her. ”I want you out! However, you are too drunk, I am too tired and if you go back to Luna now I can’t be guaranteed you won’t do worse to her or Sunset. Outside you’ll freeze to death and maybe that’s what you’ve got coming to you!”

Celestia choked on her own words and could no longer contain her tears. She made a fist, and the sudden urge to strike was difficult to suppress. “Look! Look at what you’ve made of me! Did you hear what I just said?! My god!” She was breathing hard, and became aware of her new constitution. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Her heart rate dropped, and her breathing returned to normal. She stood upright, turned to look at Chrysalis and opened her eyes again.

“I’m sorry, Chrysalis. You don’t deserve to die.” Celestia had found a way to at least appear to be collected again. “But I don’t deserve what you did to me just now! And I don’t deserve you abusing my hospitality!”

Chrysalis got up, never breaking eye contact with Celestia. “You’re right, and honest to god I’m sorry,” Chrysalis said with some guilt. “You don’t deserve this. You least of all! But you should understand how done I am with all of this and I don’t know how else I could’ve made you realize. I am done. Luna wanted me to find her dead body. Sunset jumped right before my eyes, even when I had begged her not to. They still have those knives in my back and they will twist them until I’m as dead as they should be.” Chrysalis said with all the venom she could muster. “I know their attempts hurt you just as they did me.” Celestia’s expression softened at the recognition of their mutual suffering. “But you don’t get reminded of them on the daily. You don’t have to carry that burden of being blamed for it every time you think it’s over. When you think they might’ve forgiven something you didn’t even do! Can you imagine what pain I've suffered from someone I considered to be the one? And what I would suffer from someone who is Luna all over again?”

“You felt it just now too, didn’t you?” Chrysalis asked. “That urge for violence. You wanted to punch me, to throw me through a wall.”

Quietly, Celestia nodded before she looked away in shame. “Yes I did, and I am ashamed of myself for wanting it. That isn’t me, and you’ve turned me into something I’m not!”

“Then you understand where I was when I was about to slap Sunset. You can deny it but you probably hate me right now, and rightly so! Hate me! Hate what I have done to you! It was wrong! You are right to hate me for it! But know that this is why I left them. I'm not going to tolerate their behavior any longer.”

“I am sorry,” Chrysalis continued. “I am ashamed of myself for what I did. You don’t deserve this. When you see Luna again, you mustn’t lie to her. That isn’t you either. You don’t deserve to be a liar. I don’t want to turn you into one.”

“Then what can I possibly do?!” Celestia demanded. ”She’ll never forgive me! I may never forgive myself!”

“There is nothing to forgive,” Chrysalis said. “I did this. Whatever it is you think you could’ve done is moot. I did this, end of story. Don’t blame yourself, you are innocent. As for Luna, I will tell the truth, and then so will you. Luna will just have to deal with it,” she said. “But hearing it from me first at least won’t hurt you further, nor your relationship with your sister or with Sunset.”

Chrysalis plopped back down on the sofa with a sigh. Celestia sat down next to her, though at the far end. She leaned an elbow on the armrest and rested her forehead on her outstretched fingers.

“I’m sorry,” Chrysalis said once more. She took in the sight of Celestia and frowned as what she had done continued to sink in.

“I know,” Celestia groaned. Celestia recalled, though not one minute had passed, how she had wanted to beat Chrysalis into a pulp and throw her out into the cold night. To be pushed to violence by another; something of which she had thought herself not capable, or perhaps merely hoped. She had been naive. Here sat Chrysalis, having been through nearly the same thing countless times no doubt, and twice again tonight. First when she had tried to slap Sunset, and just now kissing her. “I wish you had my restraint,” Celestia said. “But then I might not have understood.”

“It was the only way,” Chrysalis said. “I’m sorry.”

“I know. It still wasn’t right,” Celestia said again, sighing. “I’m just worried about tomorrow. About Luna. She's… not going to take this well.”

“Luna didn’t love me even long before I got here,” Chrysalis said with a shrug. “I just realized that tonight.”

“That’s not how she thinks of it,” Celestia said. “She’ll see this as you cheating on her with her own sister just to get back at her.”

“I know,” Chrysalis said. “She’s wrong of course. And she can be wrong and suffer, or face the truth and change for the better. She’ll still suffer, but at least she’ll have a way to overcome it.”

Celestia stayed quiet, acknowledging Chrysalis’ case. After a pause she said: “I just hope she trusts me enough to know I would never do something like that. What you did was wrong, and I feel foolish for not having prevented it. I should’ve just dumped you here on the bed and retired myself.”

“That’s not you either,” Chrysalis said. “You would’ve changed yourself for the worst intentionally over something you couldn’t control. People love you because you are better every time they meet you. You’ll use this to better yourself too I’m sure.”

Letting it all process, Celestia remained quiet for a while. So did Chrysalis, though only because she was unsure of what to say, or even if she should say anything at all.

“I’m sorry.” Celestia broke the silence after a few more minutes. “I’m sorry you had to go through all that.”

“All what?” Chrysalis asked.

Celestia rolled her head on the headrest of the sofa to face Chrysalis. “Everything. All those years with my sister’s nonsense.”

“After the barkeeper, you’re the second person who would actually listen after over a decade,” Chrysalis said with a sigh of relief. “Thank you. It means the world to me. Not even Luna really listens anymore. And Sunset…  Well, she's a teenager. She wouldn't understand this. She barely even understands herself.”

“I’ve been through hell,” Celestia said morosely. “I’ve often thought of having to carry Luna’s casket after she made her attempt. With Sunset’s attempt recently, that all flooded back as well. At least I’ve been able to talk about it with my friends.” She turned to Chrysalis. “But I can’t imagine what you must’ve been through back then. You had no one.”

Chrysalis gazed into those magenta eyes that had found a new level of comprehension of her. “I’ve had the same thoughts, not even sure if I’d be welcome to carry her casket, or even be at the service. I’m sure some of your family would blame me if Luna had succeeded.” Chrysalis lips quivered. “Even after… Even after I had broken up with her, this all kept haunting me. I never knew when I would get that call that she had made another attempt, that it was because I had left. And I knew. I knew that I couldn’t stop her the first time. So whether I had stayed or left, she would’ve made that second attempt.” She looked ever more desperately to Celestia not to leave her like this. “I hope you’ll never know what it’s like to know you cannot save your loved one from herself, and to never shake that weight because no one will help you carry that burden.”

“I suspected, but I never knew you had spent all that time locked up and tortured in a prison of your mind like that,” Celestia said. “You must be so glad that it’s over, that you’re free.”

Chrysalis started wiping at her eyes and nodded. “Dangit Celestia, you’re making me cry. I’m just glad someone is listening. Anyone.”

“It’s okay,” Celestia said. “Go ahead. You’re free now. Just, … let it go.”

“I… I don’t want to,” Chrysalis stammered, still wiping at her eyes. “Not with you. Not after I hurt you like I did. I don’t deserve it!”

Celestia got up and walked to her supply closet. When she came back, she put an open box of tissues on the table. Chrysalis grabbed one with a “thank you” and started cleaning herself up a little.

After a pause, Celestia spoke up again. “I’m sorry I brought you two back together. All this mess could’ve been prevented. It’s not just you, Luna’s off for the worse as well.”

”None of that is on you,” Chrysalis said with a sniffle. “Seriously, a thousand different things brought us back together and a thousand more made things worse between us. That’s not on you. If nothing else, at least I am free now, so it’s not a total loss. I just hope for Luna’s sake, and yours for that matter, that she’ll be okay by the end of this.”

“Me too,” Celestia agreed. “She is not going to take this well. At all. And if Sunset is really that terrible with you two, I fear those two might not tolerate each other for long. Not with Luna vulnerable and at the bottom of a pit.”

”She’s better off here, you know?” Chrysalis said.

Celestia turned her full body to face Chrysalis. ”Who is?” 

”Anyone. But Sunset, I mean, of course.” Chrysalis shrugged.

“Why is that?” Celestia wondered. “What makes you say that?”

“Because she needs someone to put her on the right path,” Chrysalis said. “Or at least someone to derail her from her current downward spiral.”

“Luna has been where she is now,” Celestia spoke up, “it’s why she thinks she can help her. She understands her.” Celestia played with her hands. ”I did warn Luna about how big the responsibility of looking after a teenager would be, but Luna… She didn't take no for an answer, and she wasn't going to give up on Sunset. She wanted to help Sunset as soon as she saw that opportunity.”
 
“Understanding doesn’t seem to cut it though. Everything Sunset throws at Luna sticks like napalm and Luna can’t help but either be provoked or full on retaliate. Everything gets a reply and if it’s bad it’s a downward spiral. Which is often.”

“I see,” Celestia thought for a moment. “And you think she’d be better off here because?”

“You are not like that,” Chrysalis said. “Look at what it took to get a rise out of you! And even with such a transgression, you don’t retaliate. You wanted to, and you don’t let people walk all over you. You stayed calm and dignified.”

“Just for the record, you are no longer welcome here,” Celestia said. “Do not mistake my mercy for forgiveness. You are out tomorrow and you will never set foot in here again. You will bid farewell to my sister first thing in the morning and start enjoying your new found freedom immediately after. I would prefer you to stop seeing her. Capiçe?”

“Holy crap!” Chrysalis thought. She urgently leaned away from Celestia, her focus on her disgruntled demeanor. After she relaxed her pose again, she replied: “Understandable.”

“As… I was saying… You’re also not blinded by love for Sunset,” Chrysalis continued. “Luna right now thinks Sunset can do nothing wrong, especially not against her since Luna says she understands her and that it, therefore, won’t get to her when in reality even things she only perceives as a slight set her off. Imagine Luna as she struggles to take in me leaving forever and then Sunset tormenting her.”

“I’m not sure if Luna can handle you leaving and then Sunset moving out as well, even if it’s just for a little while,” Celestia said. “But Sunset tormenting her will be a problem too. Probably worse. Your girlfriend leaves you and your own child keeps telling you she hates you.”

“Since I’ll be gone, that’s something you’ll have to figure out, I’m sorry to say,” Chrysalis said apologetically. “I’d say tell Luna that she has to be strong, so one day Sunset will want to be with her no matter what. To earn Sunset’s love, instead of expecting it out right, demanding it or trying to force it.”

“It’s like starting a whole new chapter...” Celestia sighed.





“Chrysalis has something to say,” Celestia started. She had just brought Chrysalis back to Luna’s apartment, mostly with the intent to witness the definitive breakup. It would be best if Chrysalis would leave forever. It would however, not be a smooth ride. Her arrival was met with surprise, suspicion and hostilities (in that order).

“I know you’re upset with her and you will only get more upset.” She looked at her sister as stern as she could, trying to break that glare of hers. A shred of decency would be becoming of her and if not for Chrysalis, then at least for her own sake. “But please, Luna, for me? Last night, Chrysalis… hurt me. And you know me and you know me well so listen closely. Believe me when I say: I want her out of my life. What she did to me I cannot forgive.” Luna’s mouth dropped about as much as her eyebrows jumped. She turned to Chrysalis, who looked away as though she had just downed a gallon of milk that was halfway to becoming blue Camembert. She looked back to Celestia and found her plea unwavering behind those deep magenta eyes.

Luna crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, leaving Celestia with about as much certainty of her decency as she was going to get in this mess. “Fine,” Luna grunted. “Chrysalis, what did you do now?” She asked without even looking at either of her visitors.

“I… I assaulted your sister,” Chrysalis confessed. “Sexually. I kissed her. I took her by surprise. By force, and when it was over she went to wash her mouth out and cried. I’d never heard Celestia cry before,” she turned to Celestia, “and I hope one day I can make things right with her.”

“Don’t hold your breath,” Celestia grumbled.

“You what?!” Luna blared in her most outdoor voice.

“Well she was the one to insist we,” Chrysalis flapped her hand between herself and Luna, “still had a future somehow and after the night I had, I was not having it. So I convinced her the only way I could! And it damn well worked!”

Luna turned to Celestia, completely grilling her with no more than a look. “And you let her?!”

“She sexually assaulted me, Luna!” Celestia said, offended. “Chrysalis came to me last night telling me how you never listen and how selfish you can be and… I can’t believe she put up with you if this is how you are!” She frowned. “I’m sorry, sister, but I am neither blind nor dull enough to let slip your utter disregard for me. Your own flesh and blood!” Celestia huffed. ”I will keep what little dignity I still have after what Chrysalis did to me.”

”Oh so now you’re turning against me too?” Luna turned back to Chrysalis. “That must’ve been one hell of a kiss then! I guess you enjoyed my girlfriend putting her tongue down your throat!”

Celestia gagged at the idea, remembering the abysmal taste of liquor and ashtray from only a few hours ago.

Chrysalis turned to Celestia. “She’s not listening.” She held her hand up in defeat. “You made a mistake bringing us back together, Celestia.”

Celestia nodded solemnly. “I have, and I’m sorry.” She said. “The deeper this mess gets the more I understand why you did what you did last night. I stand by what I said regarding us cutting all ties, but at least I understand a little.”

“I’m still here you know?!” Luna interrupted. “And I fully agree with you, sister. I don’t need CHEATERS in my life!” She barked at Chrysalis. “Good riddance!”

“Good,” Chrysalis said with relief (much to Luna’s surprise), “That was another thing I was going to say: this is farewell, Luna.” She looked to Luna not with hatred or anger or even remorse. In plain and utter seriousness, she said: “This is the last time we will ever speak. After today, we’ll never speak again.”

It appeared that right then, Luna had finally listened. As though she had witnessed the death of every star, space itself torn asunder and time run out, she turned paler than her sister. Death was on her doorstep and had seized her heart.

“Y-you’re leaving?” Luna stammered. Celestia made a mental note to get her eyes checked, not believing what she was witnessing. “Wait, you’re leaving?” She asked again.

“For good,” Chrysalis confirmed. ”I am done.”

“Why?” Desperation finally found purchase in Luna’s voice. “Why? Why, why?! Why are you leaving me?!”

“You kicked me out just now,” Chrysalis said calmly. “So it doesn’t even matter anymore. You sound about as done with me too.” She took a step forward and gently pushed Luna to the side, saying: “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some things to start packing.” She passed her former partner and went inside.

“No!” Luna screeched. “No! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it!” She looked to her sister. “Celestia! Tell her!”

Celestia shook her head. “I want her gone, Luna. After what she did to me, if she is capable of doing something like that, who knows what she might put you or -- god forbid -- Sunset through.”

Blood was rushing through Luna so fast her lungs had a hard time keeping up. She tipped over into the wall with dizziness and put a hand on her forehead.

“Luna?” Celestia said with some concern. “Let’s get you inside before you hit the ground.”

Luna nodded and noticed Chrysalis going about in the house. She went and sat down while Celestia got her some water. “How...” Luna quietly uttered. She looked to where Chrysalis was. “How could you abandon us like this?!”

Chrysalis kept packing, although she heard her question. “I realized yesterday,” she said, moving a heavy box with a grunt, “that you don’t love me anymore. And it wasn’t just last night, obviously. You didn’t come after me, or call, or even text me.”

“I was with Sunset!” Luna pleaded desperately. “How could I abandon her after you already left us both! I couldn't disturb her when she was asleep in my arms.”

“The night was long enough for a simple text, Luna.” Chrysalis looked up to see Luna’s weeping eyes. “But last night was peanuts. I’m leaving because of everything. All of it. Even your suicide attempt and everything. You don’t let the people who love you carry your casket.” Chrysalis exchanged a pained look with Celestia. “Especially not your sister or your loved one. We talked about that last night and if nothing else, that’s something Celestia and I will always share. Those years of dread, that chance of waking up one morning, knowing you’d have left us forever.”

“And here you are doing the very same!” Luna accused, running her fingers through her hair in distress. “Leaving us for good! You goddamn hypocrite, Chrysalis! Sunset doesn't deserve this. You… You were there last night! You heard what she said! And now what? You want to leave? You are exactly what she fears! I'd never abandon Sunset like you have done to us.”

“You left me long ago, Luna.” Chrysalis dropped what she was doing and stood up, walking close to the sofa. “When you tried setting up an entire apothecary in your stomach and wanted to, intended to, have me find your dead body! You had abandoned me and that was the biggest reason I left back then. Sunset I didn’t need to find, she threw herself into me!” She took an angry, deep and sharp breath. ”I came back thinking you had changed since then. I had hope for you, for us!”

Chrysalis’ eyes began to water, and she came to understand herself a little better: she was not done with this yet. Not by a long shot. Would she ever be done with it?

“But you’re all the same as back then and perhaps even worse in ways!” Chrysalis continued. “Because now you can mask your rotten behavior as you understanding Sunset’s rotten behavior and that somehow justifies it. Well it fucking doesn’t!” Chrysalis grit her teeth. “It fucking doesn’t!” She stepped away and from the couch and turned around, pacing in a circle. ”You don’t even understand yourself, and that’s how Sunset is dragging you into the past instead of you setting her straight! I. Am. Done. With. YOU! You can’t save Sunset, and I can’t stand another Luna with growing pains when the first one has already lost herself. You’ll end up abandoning Sunset the same way you abandoned me and you won’t - even - know, because you don’t even know it now when I’m yelling it in your face!”

Chrysalis got quiet for a moment. Luna and Celestia had watched the rage unfold, expecting more to follow. Chrysalis sighed.

“And I already lost you both, so what good am I? I couldn’t save you back then, I couldn’t save Sunset now, so what good am I if I stay?” She gave a defeated look to Luna. “I only stand to lose myself and I won’t put you two through what you did to me. Not that you don’t deserve it: I just don’t want others to feel like I do, so I don’t ever want to be like you.” She frowned. “I would disgust myself if I ever did.”

The thought of Luna abandoning her Sunset was like a flash of light, revealing all the monsters looming over her, ready to sink in their teeth. She looked to Chrysalis, who had turned around and had gotten back to packing her things again. One day, she would see Sunset do the very same all because of her. Not despite her efforts, but because of them.

Her thoughts recalled her attempt long ago. Luna clasped at her heart, only feeling dust flow through her fingers. She then turned to her sister, imagining her carrying her casket together with Chrysalis. Luna’s mind had been made up that they too would find peace if she had succeeded.

“Then… maybe,” Luna started. “Maybe you shouldn’t have.” 

“What?” Chrysalis and Celestia said. Chrysalis stopped rummaging again, though remained crouched and only listened. Celestia turned to her sister, flabbergasted.

“Maybe… Maybe things would’ve been better had you just let me go.” Luna looked away. “Then none of this would be going on. Then you’d still have your life, and maybe Sunset would be happy living with my sister instead of being stuck with the likes of me.”

“Are you absolutely mental?” Chrysalis asked, getting up again. “Who in their right mind would ever be the same again after finding their loved ones dead?”

“You would come to terms with it eventually!” Luna cried out. “You’re strong enough!”

“You were in my care, Luna!” Chrysalis yelled. She bawled her first and her cast arm tingling. “People feel guilt over neglecting a small pet! ‘Oh, that poor hamster! All because I didn’t feed it in time!’” Chrysalis once more found her vision going cloudy. “You’re a human being, Luna! You matter to us!” She briefly glanced at Celestia. ”I cared for you! And I fucking loved you with every fiber of my being! No.” She paused for a moment. ”I actually adored you! And if you had taken your life I would’ve carried that with me until it’s my turn. I wouldn’t even know what I did wrong! What had I done that you died like that?”

“Well what’s it to you now?!” Luna asked. “You’re finally over me, so now you get to have your life back as it should’ve been all along!”

“Luna,” Celestia cleared her throat, putting her hand up, “stop. You’re not going to take your own life just to spite Chrysalis.”

“You don’t understand!” Luna shrieked. “I’m not sure if I can live without her! I don’t think I can!” She sobbed. 

“Well, it’s no longer your own life to take, so don’t even think about it.” Celestia warned sternly. “You have Sunset to take care of now. What would she be without you? And you may think Chrysalis is strong enough to come to terms with it, but... I-I’m not.” Celestia admitted with her lips slightly trembling. “And I don’t want to be. I never want to be. I would scar my heart just to keep you in it.”

A knot had formed in Luna’s gut at the mental image of Celestia and Sunset standing before her own tombstone. She was already scheming to make it so and felt her heart knocking against her adam’s apple. She embraced her sister by the waist. “Well then make her stay!” She begged. “Celestia please! Please make her stay! I can’t go on without her! I can’t, I can’t, I can’t!” She was rubbing her face into Celestia, hugging ever tighter. “Make her stay!”

Her sister’s pleas tugged at her heartstrings, but Celestia could not stand by her. ”No Luna. This must happen,” she said, pushing her arms down. “You’ve been through worse, and you’ll live through this too.” She actually managed to crack a smile. “Your life is infinitely better now. You have a great career that brings you joy whenever you’re at work, you have friends, and you have Sunset to care for.” Luna sobbed relentlessly, spoiling Celestia’s clothing. ”I see that light shine in you whenever I see you working with our students or hang out with our colleagues. Even in the worst of times, and I have seen you having a rough time, you still manage to light up the room.” Luna loosened up a little. “And you’ve had wonderful times with Sunset, haven’t you? All that you’ve built for yourself to make your life worthwhile. Is life with Sunset not worth living? Isn’t it great you’re about to become a mother?”

“Not that she deserves that, at all,” Chrysalis scoffed suddenly. “You’ve also been through worse, Celestia. My little kiss last night is nothing compared to what you’ve lost to your own damn sister. I don’t know where she gets off thinking she deserves some random kid to be her own after what she’s put you through!”

Hard as it was to hear it, Celestia found it even harder to argue against. Luna, for her part, couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Celestia was about to simply tell off the detractor when Luna did as Luna do.

“I did my time!” Luna yelled. “That chapter of my life is behind us!”

“For Celestia it isn’t!” Chrysalis proclaimed. “You could’ve been a wonderful mother and aunt, yet here she is still paying the price for your actions, as are you.”

Luna looked towards her sister, demanding answers.

Last night, Chrysalis had done something terrible. Something Celestia had considered she would never come to understand. Yet, here in this new reality, she knew Luna had to change for the better if all of their lives were to improve. Chrysalis was right. Vile, damned, and right.

“You may have done the time,” Celestia said, “but really, have you changed so much that you deserve to have Sunset, someone you barely know, as your daughter?” She asked. ”Tell me, have you earned it?” She raised her eyebrows and peered Luna deeply into her eyes. ”For everything you have done, have you earned it?” Luna stayed quiet. Celestia saw her own somber reflection in her sister’s eyes. “What about me?” She asked. Luna let out a small gasp. ”Have I earned it?” Luna looked up in shock. “Don’t I deserve to be a mother? What are you saying, really?”

Whatever solid ground Luna had made for herself to even ask for those adoption papers in the first place had now turned out to be no more than thin air. Seeing Chrysalis’ righteous rage and packing her things due to years of Luna being who she is, made it clear to her that she was unfit to care for neither herself nor for a partner and much less for a child. She hadn’t noticed her own shortcomings and still remained oblivious to them, and this would be her downfall if she would not strive to overcome them. At least, at the very least, now she had become aware that she had some very serious shortcomings, even if those shortcomings remained unknown to her.

Luna hadn’t changed. Not enough. She has done terrible things to those around her. She has done horrible things to herself and has done too little to atone. Today was a day of reckoning, and all of her debt was collected at once. All her efforts put into her career, into her relationships, everything, had done nothing to prevent all this suffering at once; it merely compensated for some of it, for which she was grateful.

A few years back, Luna had remembered how she had indeed intended for Chrysalis to find her dead in their apartment. She couldn’t believe she even thought up something so vile. The very fact that she would disavow such things now, she had hoped, had indicated to her that she had changed for the better. If only she could tell her past self not to go on like she had to become who she is today: a miserable and hopeless wreck who knew only that she knew nothing of herself. So little that loving others properly was almost alien to her.

She hadn’t grown, she had only gotten older. The only thing she had to show for it was a few extra candles on her birthday cake.

The shock had receded. Luna’s posture had relaxed while Chrysalis and Celestia’s words sank in. A moment of silence later, she turned to her sister once again, though she couldn’t face her for the life of her.

It was at that time Sunset stepped in. “What’s with all the racket?” She asked with a yawn. She noticed Chrysalis had returned and was moving to and fro, gathering things that Sunset knew distinctly belonged to Chrysalis. Luna stood before her sister, entirely distraught and Celestia just let it all happen.

“I’m moving out,” Chrysalis announced bluntly without looking up. “I would really appreciate it if you could help me get my things since my broken arm isn’t exactly making things easier. When I’m done I’m leaving.”

“Speaking of leaving,” Celestia checked her watch, “I should take my leave soon. Duty calls.” She looked at Sunset, who in turn looked at Luna and then back at her. “If you want to, Sunset, you can come with me for today. I can give you time to get ready.”

“I think I’d rather help Chrysalis pack her things,” Sunset said cautiously, not exactly sure why Celestia wanted her in school all of a sudden. Luna not interrupting her when she did so was all the more suspicious.

Celestia got up. “Luna, can you take care of Sunset for today? It’s okay if you’re not up for it.”

“She’s not,” Chrysalis answered instead. “You know she’s not. Stop fooling around, Celestia.”

“Leave Sunset,” Luna snapped, glaring at Chrysalis. “She needs to stay with me. I’ll be fine!” Her face was drenched in tears still running down. The mess she found herself in seemed irresolvable. What little control she still could find was like a lifeline.

“For the record,” Sunset said, mostly to Celestia, “I’m staying because Celestia wanting me in school out of nowhere is weird.”

Celestia looked around and found the room had become a congress of the doomed. She sighed, not knowing what gore pit and hellscape would await her later today. They had all chosen their own fate for themselves and she had offered them all she could. Lastly, she looked to Luna, who now sat on the sofa with her arms and legs crossed, staring into nothingness.

“Alright then,” she said with a pause, “I will drop by again later today to check up on you, sister.” She looked to Chrysalis and crossed her thumb across her throat, telling her all she needed to know. Chrysalis nodded and continued packing. Celestia stepped outside and closed the door behind her.

Sunset came further into the room and tried to piece together what had happened since she passed out last night. Chrysalis seemed to be an absolute wreck from the looks of it, although seeing her busy as she was might lead one to believe otherwise. Luna had become a little pile of lots of misery. She was lying on the couch and crying into a pillow.

A memory from last night popped into Sunset’s mind and she walked over to Chrysalis. “So… are you still mad at me, you know, from last night?”

“It doesn’t matter anymore,” Chrysalis said, not even bothering to look at Sunset. She still continued to do what she was doing. ”I’m done with it.”

“Did Luna kick you out?” Sunset asked. She looked to the sofa, still hearing faint weeping and got her answer. “No, you’re leaving on your own. Well, I saw that coming a mile away. So much for all that sweet talk yesterday.”

Luna’s ears perked up. She got up from her prone position to look over to where Sunset was, onlooking the conversation.

“At least you’ve got a place to go,” Sunset said to Chrysalis. 

“I actually don’t, not yet anyway,” Chrysalis shrugged. “I’ll just find a place to stay on short notice, maybe spend a night or two in my car or in a motel.” She looked at Sunset. “I just really wanted to get out of here. I don’t care where I go,” she said with a nod. ”Just not here.”

“Sleeping in a car doesn’t sound half bad,” Sunset asserted, thinking for a moment. “I mean I am sixteen now, and it’s dirt cheap.”

“Sunset, no!” Luna raised her voice. “Don't be so ridiculous, you’re not living in a car.” She turned to Chrysalis. “And don’t you give her any ideas. If you’re leaving just shut up, pack your shit, and go. And you,” she turned back to Sunset. “You’re not about to abandon me too.”

“Oh, no, I was talking about when you’ll kick me out.” Sunset said plainly. “Everyone always abandons me: First my parents, then Celestia, some other ponies, erm, people, and now Chrysalis is leaving, and then you’ll kick me out soon.” Sunset remained unwavering. “And then I’ll meet new people who will abandon me. My friends and I will grow up and then abandon one another. I’ll get into a relationship, abandon him, have a child, and then abandon them as well. Circle of life. Turtles all the way down.”

Luna froze up. Not even sure what to think about what Sunset had just said.

“What?” Sunset asked with a raised eyebrow. “I guess you weren’t listening last night.”

“Yeah, listening is a tough one for Luna. It’s why I’m leaving,” Chrysalis chipped in her two cents. “Among other reasons.”

“Shut it, Chrysalis!” Luna shot back. “Unless you want me to kick you out right this minute!”

“Like mother like daughter,” Chrysalis muttered with a slight scoff and a roll of her eyes.

“What was that?!” Luna demanded.

“I said ‘like mother like daughter!” Chrysalis yelled. “You’re saying the exact same thing Sunset said to me last night. God, you don’t listen, ever! Not even to yourself!” Chrysalis turned to Sunset. “I told her and I’ll tell you, she’ll drive you away and won’t even know she’s doing it or how it’s happening. You said she’ll abandon you but I’ll bet she’ll drive you crazy enough to run away first.”

“Don’t listen to her, Sunset,” Luna said with a sudden soothing motherly voice. “We’re completely different from me and Chrysalis.” Sunset looked to the mess of a woman. “So we can just stay here, and once the dust has settled, we can just be happy here, just the two of us.”

“And we’ll go out for ice cream every day, and the sky will be nothing but rainbows and sunshine~” Sunset continued mocking her. ”Every day you’ll refill my bottle of water, change my litter, and tell me how cute I am.” She gave her a freeze ray of a glare. “Get real Luna.”

Chrysalis kept her eyes on Luna, who looked back to her in shock. Chrysalis raised an eyebrow, and her look became knowing. A silent ‘told you so’.

Sunset turned Luna a cold shoulder and went back to helping Chrysalis. She went into Luna and Chrysalis’ bedroom and brought out a whole bunch of clothes that belonged to Chrysalis. She dropped them in a nice stack near where Chrysalis was working on some of her other items.

”Where do you want these?” Sunset asked. “Oh, let’s make a few piles.” She lifted a dark gray piece with some black streaks. “Hmm… this one can go on ‘yesterday’s fashion.’”

Chrysalis turned to her, said nothing and continued gathering her stuff. She walked over to the window sill in her old bedroom. 

“Oh, this would not befit a newly made homeless person,” Sunset continued. “Luna, you want to keep this?” She asked rhetorically. “I’ll put it in ‘burn’ for now.” She looked over to the bedroom, but heard not a peep. No fast footsteps drawing closer, no angry grunt, nothing.

Sunset got up and went into her own bedroom. She came out with her newly given jacket. “You want this back by the way?” She asked with a smirk.

“Sunset!” Luna said alarmed, “You can’t be serious! I gave that to you for a reason!”

“What?” Sunset retorted. “It’s my jacket to do with what I want.”

Chrysalis poked her head out the bedroom door. “Oh, yeah sure.” She walked over and took it from Sunset. “Thanks,” she said to Sunset. Immediately, she went over to Luna and gave the jacket back to her (much to Sunset’s chagrin). “You’re welcome,” Chrysalis handed it over. “You almost lost those memories, you know?”

Luna looked to Chrysalis and gulped, knowing she was right. She scowled at Sunset, who had a glimmer in her eyes. “What are you doing?”

“I’m helping Chrysalis pack her stuff, of course,” Sunset answered, not looking at Luna.

Sunset went into Chrysalis’ and Luna’s bedroom. Things stayed quiet for a bit save for some sounds of rummaging and digging. She came back from Chrysalis bedroom with the box she found under all the clothes she had brought out just before. She set it on the table and couldn’t resist a peek. “What are these remotes?” She thought to herself. She put the lid on the table and grabbed the smallest one. It had no more than a button and a dial, which she immediately turned up to eleven. At the press of the button, a sudden loud buzzing came from Chrysalis’ room, and immediately Sunset turned off the device. 

“Sorry,” she blushed. “Must’ve dropped my phone,” Sunset said to no one in particular.

Chrysalis grinned mischievously as she saw Sunset trying to casually walk back into her room, knowing exactly where she was heading. Her white lie would come back to haunt her soon enough. Inconspicuously, she went about gathering some of her items from the restroom, nowhere near Sunset.

There was another quieter buzz this time. Sunset honed in on a small bedside table, clearly hearing the sound emanating from the drawer. She opened it and found a large purple egg, buzzing about. “What on earth…?” Sunset asked herself, confused.

She emptied the drawer into a box and brought it back to the living room. Luna turned to look at her with wide eyes.

“I think I’ve found a remote control kitchen timer.” Sunset said, holding up the purple egg and carefully inspecting it. ”Though… There aren't any numbers on it.” She looked up. “Last year’s easter egg hunt?” She sniffed it. “It smells funny, but not spoiled. What the hay is this?”

Luna cursed under her breath. Her cheeks slightly reddened. ”Sunset, give me that.” 

Sunset ignored Luna’s comment, and decided to press her even further. ”Why does Chrysalis have this in your room?” She questioned with curiosity. Her eyebrow raised when she felt the vibration against her hand. ”And why does it feel so intense?” 

Luna pinched the bridge of her nose. ”I’ll explain when you're older,” she sighed. ”Now, can you please hand it over?”

”Or, you could just tell me what it is?” Sunset pressed once more, frowning at Luna. 

”Sunset, stop asking questions, and just give me it!” Luna shouted back, becoming annoyed. 

”Just tell me,” Sunset grinned. 

Luna pursed her lips together. She got up from the sofa and walked to where Sunset was. She put the palm of her hand out. ”Give. Now.” She firmly said. 

Sunset lifted her chin up to stare Luna down. ”You can't tell me what to do,” she said. ”You’re not my mom.” 

”Sunset, I am giving you one warning. I am not in the mood to be tested today.” Luna folded her arms, not amused. 

”Fine,” Sunset smirked, “I’ll figure it out myself,” she said. She turned around and went to walk towards her bedroom.

”Young lady! Get back here this instant!” Luna groaned.

Luna, quick on her heels, chased after Sunset. Turning a corner, and not looking where she was going, she met Chrysalis’ forehead with a bang.

”Ow! Fucking hell, Luna!” Chrysalis said, putting her hand on her forehead. ”Are you alright?” She asked in worry. ”Here, let me check.” She said, moving Luna’s hair out of the way with her finger to see her forehead.

”I’m fine, Chrysalis. Now, get out of my way.” Luna hissed. She pushed her out of the way. 

”Geez, I was only trying to help,” Chrysalis mumbled under her breath. ”I don't know why I still bother.”

A moment after, Luna entered her bedroom. She looked over to the left side of her bed and noticed Sunset was still in the corner, searching through some of Chrysalis’ things. Luna walked into the room further. 

”Sunset Shimmer!” Luna raised her voice, putting her hands on her hips. ”Whatever you think you are doing, stop it right now.”

”Or what?” Sunset said, still doing her own thing. ”You’ll kick me out?”

”If you really want to know, just give me the egg and I’ll tell you.” Chrysalis had announced herself, standing at the doorway. ”It’s mine anyway, so might as well pack it.” She shrugged. 
 
“Chrysalis! What the heck!” Luna yelled. ”You can't do that! She's too young!”

Sunset happily tossed her the egg. Luna tried intercepting it but instead booped it with her head and sent it straight into Chrysalis’ hand.

“Thank you,” Chrysalis said. She turned around and went back to packing. Luna and Chrysalis exchanged a confused look. Sunset frowned.

“Well?!” She asked indignantly. ”Are you going to tell me or what?!”

Chrysalis turned around, still holding the egg. “I didn’t say I’d tell you now. I’ll tell you when you’re 18.” Sunset was about to speak up, but Chrysalis continued. “OR!.... Or, If you really really really want to know, I can show you. It’ll be extremely uncomfortable though. Imagine your finger in a bowling ball with holes that are slightly too narrow, except they’re so narrow you get your fingers stuck. That level of uncomfortable. Where you know you’ll have to dislocate your fingers to get them out.”

Sunset and Luna cringed at picturing said situation. Sunset looked to Luna, who still looked like she was about to explode at Chrysalis. She gulped. Was that discomfort worth seeing some fireworks? Surely Chrysalis merely exaggerated to get her to back off.

“O-okay,” Sunset began, “So show me.”

Chrysalis grabbed Luna by the shoulder and winked. Luna caught on. ”Well, you heard her. She literally asked for it.” Chrysalis said. She bowed down to whisper in Luna’s ear, loud enough for Sunset to hear. “Go get the first aid kit, some bandaids and disinfectant.”

Luna got up quietly and made haste. Sunset was having second thoughts, and third thoughts. “Where’s the kaboom?” She thought, watching Luna get out of the room. “There was supposed to be a big kaboom!” Her eyes were darting around the room, and she only found she was now the one caught in her own bluff.

Chrysalis held up the egg, tossing it up in her own hand and looking to Sunset with pity, as though she was about to get a permanent scar or two. “Sunset, can you come stand over here please?” Chrysalis said, pointing inches in front of herself. Sunset followed suit. Nothing was really going to happen, right? Chrysalis grabbed Sunset by the shoulder and turned her around. She put pressure on her shoulder, which Sunset couldn’t decipher.

“Uuhm, Chrysalis, what are you doing?” Sunset asked, turning around again. “And shouldn’t we wait for Luna for that first aid kit?” Saying it out loud made her heart beat faster.

“Well, you wanted to know so I figured you’d at least know how to do this,” Chrysalis said. “But since you don’t even know what’s going on, I don’t think you can handle what’s next.” Chrysalis looked at the egg and then looked Sunset up and down. “Yeah, we would definitely need that first aid kit.”

With the bomb entirely defused, there was nothing left to gain. Sunset no longer felt like dislocating her fingers and took a step back. “Yeah no, that’s not happening. You can use Luna as your little guinea pig.”

“Then trust us when we say you don’t need or want to know something when we tell you,” Chrysalis said. “Well, I say we. I mean Luna. Since I’m leaving.”

Sunset looked up to Chrysalis. ”You know, you really are just like my mom, heck you're even like my dad, doing shit like this to me. The only difference is they actually followed through.”

Luna, who was standing just an earshot away in the hallway, put her hand over her chest when she heard those words coming out of Sunset’s mouth. Without thinking, she walked back in. Concern clear on her face. ”Sunset?” Sunset and Chrysalis looked to her. Luna walked over to her, attempting to grab Sunset’s hand. ”I heard what just said, and Sunset, please. Did your parents do more to you? Other than,” She gulped, fearing what the answer might be. ”Abuse you?” 

Sunset swatted Luna’s hand away. ”Why should I bother to tell you?!” She scowled deeply. ”I thought you guys were going to be honest with me, yet you haven't even told me the truth since I started to live here!” She looked at Chrysalis. ”Neither of you can tell me the truth about something so trivial!” 

“I just did tell you the truth,” Chrysalis corrected. “The truth being that you don’t even want to know what it is or maybe that you’re just not ready yet. Either or, that’s the truth. And maybe whatever other things you think we didn’t tell you about aren’t actually trivial.” Chrysalis turned around and walked out the door. “Now can we please get back to packing so I can leave?”

Luna looked on with concern and turned to Sunset. The reality of Chrysalis wanting to leave and actually leaving had kicked in again, and she wasn’t even sure what to make of that yet, considering what had happened last night. She saw that Sunset, on the other hand, was not affected in the slightest; save for the slight agitation at Chrysalis defusing demeanor.

Sunset stepped out of the room after Chrysalis. She dropped the remote on the ground. “I guess you’ll want to pack this too then?” She asked. Chrysalis faced her, and saw her kicking the remote over to her at far too great a speed. It shot past her and hit the wall hard enough for the case to open and the components to fly out.

“Good luck with that brat of yours, Luna,” Chrysalis looked at Sunset with great disgust. “I’ll bet you two won’t last a day together.”

“You’re such a goddamn hypocrite Chrysalis!” Luna said, “Calling her a brat again. What’s next, you’ll slap her again and run away?”

“At least she knows how to be a mom!” Sunset suddenly yelled out. “Maybe I should go with her!” She turned to Chrysalis. “Please, Chrysalis! Can I come with you? Living with you sounds so much better than living in this hell hole.”

Chrysalis burst out laughing, half disbelieving she actually just heard that.

“I mean it!” Sunset pleaded. “At least I’d get some personal space, some alone time.”

“Not a chance, kid.” Chrysalis shook her head in astonishment. ”I am not going through another Luna.”

Across the room, behind Sunset, Chrysalis heard a bump. She saw that poor woman she used to love dropped to her knees. On all frequencies she was broadcasting the misery of someone who’s heart had been broken and the pieces crushed to dust. Betrayed by her beloved, rejected by her daughter with every other breath, and it had all come at her own hands. She knew not why or how she was this worthless of a family member, but seeing her world fall apart right before her eyes strengthened Chrysalis’ harsh words. Her tight grip on Sunset, her mistreating Chrysalis, all of it had gone unnoticed to this very point. Except that wasn’t even true: she had intentionally put severe checks on Sunset because she deemed it was the right thing to do. She had intentionally scolded Chrysalis because she thought it was the right thing to do when she should’ve at least defended her as well.

Luna started to scream a raw and guttural scream as she bowed forward further. Her chest pressed into her thighs and she held her lower arms over her head in agony. Another wail bust forth, broken up by deep and rattled sobs. Chrysalis looked on, tears in her eyes at the desperate and hopeless sight.

“Pathetic,” Sunset said callously. “Crying over having lost something you never had to begin with.”

Chrysalis got up from her packing and walked up to Sunset, manhandling her with one hand. She grabbed her by the collar and tightened her grip, pushing her up the wall. “You are the absolute lowest scum, you know that?! How dare you treat Luna like that when she has done everything for you!” She hissed through clenched teeth. She had never seen Luna in a state as dire as this, or anyone for that matter. She wasn’t one to care about just anybody, but nobody deserves a kicking when they’re down. This was straight up savagery.

Luna got up and rushed between Sunset and Chrysalis, pushing them apart. Chrysalis relented reluctantly.

“Please!” Luna begged. “Please, Chrysalis. Don’t make things even worse. Please. She’s just a kid.” Luna daren’t face either of the two she just broke up. “Just leave… please just leave.”

Chrysalis grabbed Luna’s hand and put it down by Luna’s side. “Alright.” She said quietly. “If you want my advice, I think you two should have some time apart. Celestia has a spare room. It’s really nice.”

“I don’t want to,” rejected Luna. “Sunset is all I’ve got left. I’m not about to lose her too.”

“I broke your heart, again, Luna,” Chrysalis said, her voice breaking. “Tonight, when you’re home alone with the ticking of the clock echoing around the house, you’re not gonna be a happy camper. You’ll have to endure that and Sunset kicking you while you’re down like she did just now.” She paused. “Why suffer meaninglessly? Why do that to yourself?”

”Because we deserve each other,” Luna retorted, repeating what Chrysalis said the night before. “Isn’t that right?”

Chrysalis looked to Sunset, who for god knows whatever reason was smirking like she’d just won the last battle.

“Yeah,” Chrysalis agreed, defeat apparent. ”You really do.”

“We’ll be reminiscing about the good times,” Sunset smiled maliciously. “And thinking about future plans. We’ll be fine. Who knows Luna might want to snuggle later too.”

“Maybe you should just shut the hell up and let Luna suffer in peace,” Chrysalis growled, knowing exactly what torture a night like that would be for Luna.

“Chrysalis, I think you should leave,” Luna said, motioning her and towards the door.

Chrysalis snapped her head around, scowling at Luna. “I’m not done packing yet.”

“Yes you are,” Luna said with a slight glare. “If you’re that concerned for me, just rest assured I’ll be happily ridding my house of all your stuff today. Just pick it up later, I don’t care.”

“Fine,” Chrysalis said. “Just make sure I get it all intact, thanks!” Still, Sunset was smirking. Violent thoughts rose within Chrysalis, and with a frown and a huff, she suppressed her urges. She grabbed her immediate necessities. Wallet, purse, phone and car keys among other things, and headed for the door. She put on her coat and looked around the room one last time. “Any last words?” She asked. “Last chance.”

”You know, when we first started to talk about becoming a family with Sunset, I couldn't wait to do this with you because I thought you would have been an amazing mother,” Luna whispered between them, folding her arms. ”Turns out I was wrong.” She looked over to where Sunset was, then turned back to Chrysalis. ”Sunset deserves a much better parent than you with how you've been treating her. My sister was right, there's no telling what you might do to her or even me. I just hope when you find your new family you'll treat them better.”

”Yeah,” Chrysalis ironically agreed. ”I’m definitely the worst person here. Good thing I'm leaving, isn't it? You won't have to deal with me anymore. Next farewell you’ll say is you deserve a much better daughter.”

”I will not be saying farewell to Sunset,” Luna denied. ”My child stays with me.” She pointed to herself. ”I am her parent, not like you would understand that since you're abandoning us.” 

”Don't hold your breath,” Chrysalis spoke. ”Your so-called ”child” can't stand the thought of living with you. So good luck with that. Don't come running back to me when everything goes tits up.”

”Ha! Like you would be the first person I would run to!” Luna laughed. 

”We’ll see,” Chrysalis said. “Well, then I guess this is it.”

”Indeed, it is. Goodbye, Chrysalis.” Luna pushed Chrysalis out the door with full force, but before Chrysalis could say anything else, Luna slammed the door on her. After a minute, Luna walked away. She lifted a box that had some of Chrysalis’ belongings, and opened the living room window. ”Oh, and Chrysalis!” She shouted.

Chrysalis, who was outside by her car, turned around to see Luna throwing out her clothes. 

”I thought you might need a change of clothes since last night’s ones smell of alcohol and cigarettes! You don't want your new girlfriend to think you stink!” Luna yelled from the top of the apartment complex, looking down on Chrysalis. A few neighbours stood on the sidewalk, watching all of the commotion going on. Shocked to see the usual loving couple fighting.

Chrysalis stuck up her middle finger, and ran forward to collect her falling items. ”Hey, Luna!” She called. ”Go suck on a whole bag of extra limp needle dicks!”

Luna gasped dramatically. ”How about you eat my ass you dirty whore!” She threw out the rest of what was in the box.

“You also forgot these!” Sunset jeered happily from the window one room over. She tossed a few paper airplanes at Chrysalis. They swirled gently down the side of the building, and one of them was heading towards Chrysalis straight enough she could snatch it from mid air. She unfolded it and found it to be of her own handiwork.

“Hey! I worked ha-” Chrysalis stopped herself and turned to Luna. “Good luck.” She turned her back, still shouting: ”I am free from you motherfuckers! Enjoy your life with your bratty ’daughter’!”

”Oh, I will!” Luna shouted. ”Happily.” With that final comment, Luna pursed her lips together and slammed the window. Huffing, she walked over to the sofa and sat down. Her arms folded and legs crossed. A moment later, Sunset walked back through.

”Woah, dramatic much? I never thought I'd hear you say something like that.” Sunset smirked. ”What happened between you two anyway?” She asked. ”I thought you two were ’in love’?” 

”Sit, please,” Luna motioned her hand to the empty space on the sofa. Sunset followed suit. ”There’s no other way than telling you this other than the truth, and I would rather tell you the truth because it's the right thing to do.” Luna sighed heavily. Sunset stared at Luna quizzingly. ”Chrysalis kissed Celestia last night.” Luna revealed.

”Haha, oh wow!” Sunset said with a laugh. “I mean, wait, what?”
 
”It’s true,” Luna nodded, looking down. ”My girlfriend kissed my sister as a way to show Celestia how done she was with me.” She wiped a tear away. ”I never thought Chrysalis would ever betray me like this, but I guess it was my fault. I pushed her too far, and now she’s gone.” However, a smile broke through her tears when she looked at Sunset. ”Things are going to be quiet for a while now, but at least I still have you. You’re the most important thing to me. Not anyone else. Just you and me, that's all I need.” She cupped Sunset’s face with her hand.

Sunset moved back. She frowned. “I’m not going to stick around out of pity, just so you know. You get what you deserve.”

“I just wish I knew why,” Luna leaned forward, resting her hands on her chin. “I just don’t know why.”

Sunset turned to sit next to Luna and moved closer, almost leaning into her. “Remember when Chrysalis came back and you two met again for the first time since forever?” Sunset asked. She leaned down further, being shoulder to shoulder with Luna. “What was it like? Was her embrace like you remembered?”

“I… It was like she never left,” Luna admitted. 

Sunset slumped down some more, fully leaning into Luna now. “And then she met me,” she said, “And we were all having such a good time together. Remember when we went bowling? And when we got our picture taken eating churros? Chrysalis was practically feeding you like you were her pet.”

Luna laughed tearily. ”I have that photo on my desk in my office,” she said, unsure whether she should throw that out now or keep it for the memory of what could have been.

”Oh, and remember how we all bonded over video games, and how Chrysalis used to make us watch all these videos online? Remember the panda videos?” Sunset recalled. 

For a good three hours, Sunset kept reminiscing about when things went right in the world. By the end of it, Luna sat halfway lying down with Sunset almost in her lap, loosely embracing her with her arms just lying on her. Sunset brought up the good times, when they were having fun, or made up after a fight. How great it was that Chrysalis had saved Sunset’s life, only for them now to be apart. Chrysalis hadn’t even healed her broken arm and yet Luna tossed her out.