“Dear, I need you to wake up.” A voice requested with all the gentleness of an angel. As I opened my eyes, I was greeted by a bright light beaming down in my right eye. I blinked several times before the wretched light was taken away from my face; revealing a pink coated mare with a sun bleached yellow mane and tail. The combination of colors was less than appealing; forcing a cringe of disapproval. Fortunately, the mare didn't seem to notice my discomfort, or at least didn't show it, as she just gave a sigh of relief instead.
When the novelty of my situation wore off, my mind quickly snapped back to its last thought before the black out. The first thought was my realization this dream isn't over, the second was focused on the pain in the back of my head. The first one should have been my primary concern but the second took precedence. Whatever stuck me did a number, as even the fluffy pillow below me irritated my aching head. I tried to get up and move my head hoping it would somehow alleviate my pain. The pony over me stopped me however, and rested my head back down. I let out a groan of discomfort to which the mare stepped aside to grab something.
As she moved I became aware of my surroundings and what a surrounding it was. I was in a small confined bed with soft, thick, woolly, spring green, sheets tucked up to my chin. The bed was surprisingly comfortable and well kept despite the fact I seemed to have been actively sleeping in it. As for the room, it was made of blank, light, grey textiles flooring and purple plaster walls decorated with silhouettes of foals playing painted on top. A few dangling plastic stars and clouds hung from the ceiling reflecting the sunlight, coming in through a window on my right, around the room. It was like a dozen disco balls lit the room, and truthfully it was more than a bit mesmerizing to watch.
As the lights lost my interest, my eyes moved to look down to my body. To my horror I was still a filly, white coat, red mane and all, which shouldn't have been that surprising given the circumstances. It was cleaner this time around at least; making the coat a more cloud like white and the mane a deeper and richer red. The caveat to this was half a dozen cuts and stitches across my body. While the fur did a good job of covering most of it, I still looked like some Frankenstein reject. Oh God, this can't be real, can it? I wondered to myself as every experience was another nail in the coffin to the idea this wasn't all just a bad drug trip. I really must be here, so the only question that remains is: am I in hell, purgatory or heaven? Honestly, I wasn't sure I wanted to know the answer either, as none of them seemed to be ideal since they all implied the crazy man likely off’ed me. Unless, I reasoned, He was telling the truth. Which, to be frank, It wasn't any better of a possibility.
My contemplation of my current circumstances was interrupted by the mare before they could go any further. She was back in front of me, nudging me with a glass of water. That's when I recalled the parchment of my dry throat. My frustration was quickly replaced with relief at the sight of the refreshing liquid. I needed that drink if only to alleviate the pain in my throat, but as I reached for it, I stopped; coming to a horrible realization.
I didn't know how to grip things with my new appendages! There were no fingers, only flat stubs on the end of the fat sausages. My expression went from relief to dread in a second. It's just one problem after another, I panicked. I nervously scratched my head as I paused to think about my conundrum. To which the mare gave me a concerned look at my delay. Couldn't say I blamed her, my rapidly changing emotions was probably a sight to behold and it wasn’t like I could voice my issues, on account of my throat aching from breathing alone.
Great she thinks you're an idiot, you dolt! My cheeks became hot with embarrassment at this realization. I could have motioned for help sure, but I still had too much self respect for that. So my mind raced for a solution only to find one. In a swift act of genius, I took it and pressed it tightly between my hooves. Not enough to crush the cup, but enough to hold it in place. It wasn't the most elegant solution, as it gave me poor control and caused the cup to shake like a leaf in the fall, but it would work until I figured out how to actually grab things. With that I greedily drank down the water; relief immediately flooded my throat and body as a whole. Within a moment my throat's dryness was at least partially palleted allowing me to let out a sigh of relief without notable pain. After I finished the cup the mare looked at me and finally spoke up again.
“Can you tell me what you were doing in the Everfree forest dear?” The mare's voice was slow and soft. I guess it was her way of comforting me though being, at least formally, a twenty year old guy the voice came off as patronizing rather than comforting. It took a good portion of my will power not to scowl in annoyance for that reason. While I could understand the mare’s belief that I was a filly I preferred to avoid such a conversation in the future; so I decided to just be truthful with her. After all ponies had magic, I'm sure body swapping was at least something they were familiar with. Needless to say it was a mistake, the first of many I’d probably be coming to make in Equestria.
“Fantastic, you think I'm a crazy idiot.” I groaned as I crashed my hooves into my face in frustration. She didn't say it with words, but I could see the panic and worry in her eyes as I finished my story. How on God’s green Earth is that not reasonable? I wanted to explode, not necessarily at the poor mare, but in general. This whole experience was hell. Sure in my last life things weren't ideal, but I wasn't some seemingly deranged, Frankenstein looking, little girl! My hooves flew off my face and into the air before coming back down to run through my mane. The pain in the back of my head started to spike up again too but I didn't care at this point. I just wanted to vent out my anger in whatever way I could.
"I think no such thing dear.” She lied in a soft tone; all while her face stayed frozen in a concerned position. She opened her mouth to add something but stopped herself. I scowled a bit and shook my head at the obvious lie. While it may have worked on a foal, I was no foal, at least in mind, or at least I hope so.
“It's because I'm a filly and someone hit me in the back of the head isn't it?” I huffed as I crossed my hooves in frustration. Admittedly my reaction probably only fed into the idea I was just a foal and not an adult human, but I was too angry to care. I would have continued my little tirade too if not for the nurse beating me to the punch and the pain in the back of my skull spiking to a point I couldn't handle. So, I reluctantly forced myself to cool down as she spoke or till the pain died away whichever came first.
“Somepony,” she corrected like some sort of school teacher, “and it was a skycarriage, not a pony that hit you. Well at least not a pony that directly hit you.” It took me a few minutes to process the words she spoke as the whole thing through me in a loop. Right, magical pony land, magical pony vocabulary and concepts, I reminded myself. This whole experience was one headache after another, with seemingly no break between.
“Of course, the infamous pony language grammatical system. Here I was thinking I was done with the study of languages after college. Foolish me, I should have foreseen this and studied up on my Ponish. So forgive my poor grammatical skills.” I sarcastically replied in a bitter tone. The mare nervously shifted side to side clearly unsure how to respond. After watching the mare squirm around uncomfortably I lowered my head as my frustration started to subside.
“Sorry, you didn’t deserve that. I’m just angry with all this is all.” I added in the softest tone I could.
“If it makes you feel better sweetie, I think your Ponish is far above most ponies your age.” She replied with a smile still dripping with worry that anything she might say would set me off. Which admittedly, her ‘sweetie’ comment did cause some of my annoyance to return but I didn’t mention it.
“You are a big uhh..stallion?” she added with a nervous smile, which only fueled my urge to scream again. My frustration must have been more apparent with the second comment than the first, as the mare's discomfort only grew.
"Listen I'm not, er wasn't, a stallion or even pony for that matter. I'm not from Equestria either. I was what is known as a human. A male, your equivalent to a stallion." I foolishly explained again. I don't know why I thought trying to explain this concept to the mare, who was clearly out of her depth, was a good idea. She clearly didn't understand the first time and insisting on it just made her panic more.
Okay, this isn't working. New plan, I need to see a pony more knowledgeable in magic. With any luck they'll at least be open to the premise of my problem and be able to help. Or at least understand I'm not a crazy filly. I reasoned. It was a game plan for sure, but the only problem was how do I get to that point? Who do I even speak to? God knows if this world is anything actually like the show, and if it is what are the actual odds I get to see a pony like Sun Burst, Starswirl or Twilight? Especially if Twilight is already princess...so that's a no. If Sun Burst is an advisor to the crystal empire or a teacher and I really don't like the idea of dealing with Starswirl… There was Starlight, but something tells me shed be too busy for a non student... None of this takes into account how I, as a filly, even get to said places either, great.
The more I tried to work out my plan the more I wanted to pound my hooves into something. I wasn't exactly one for venting my emotions, which wasn't helped by the fact that in this scenario they think my emotions are irrational, so smashing my hooves into something didn't seemed like a good idea. So I laid back with a frustrated huff of air to cool off.
As I lay there the mare eyed me for a few moments before telling me she'd be back. With that she scurried out the room like a dog with its tail tucked between its legs. I let out a sigh of relief, as I'm not sure how much more of that baby talk I could take before blowing up again. As time passed my frustration began to subside and my mind became clear once more. So I went back to thinking.
Your Mind is the only tool you have right now. So use it! I reminded myself. Okay, so there has to be more magically inclined ponies in Equestria. Now I just need to find them. I’m stuck in a hospital anyway, so I have plenty of time to work on it. With any luck, one of the doctors might even be a magically inclined unicorn themselves. It was a vague plan, but it was a step in the right direction and that's all I needed right now.