//------------------------------// // Not another ninja! // Story: Cave Johnson and Twilight Sparkle here! Let's do this for Science! // by Chetzi //------------------------------// A silent ninja drops by the entrance to the lab, the soft thud of hooves hitting the dirt the only sound being made. “Black Mesa makes best science,” the ninja whispered to himself in a hushed tone. He then knocked on the front door. “Who’s there?” said one of the late night scientists as she peeked through a little hole in the door. “Uh, cough, Cave Johnson,” said the ninja in a comically bad german accent, which Cave doesn’t even have. “Who says ‘cough’? Why not just cough? Eh, whatever. Boss, you sound different. And you are dressed like a ninja.” “Uh... I... I have a cold! And uh, my calendar is off, I thought it was Nightmare Night.” “Who has Nightmare Night in July? Eh, seems legit. Come in, Mr. Johnson sir.” The scientist opened the door and trotted off. “I can’t belive that actually worked.” As the ninja walked through the door, he noticed the large hole next to the door that he could’ve just walked through. He then facehoofed at his own stupidity, and then closed the door on his way in. His eyes scanned the hall, finding nothing moving. Once that was done, he trotted down the hall. “Now, where is the power source of this place?” He slammed his head into a large, yellow, glowing sign that said, ‘POWER SOURCE TURN RIGHT.’ Well. He ducked his head into the door the sign pointed to, and inside, he found thirty or so hamsters running on hamster wheels. A black cable was connected from the wheels, to an unusually large battery on the other side of the room. “Aperture science’s labs are powered by... hamsters? Are they serious?” “Yes, we are, and they’re from the hamster races,” Twilight said as she blocked the ninja from leaving the room. “What are you doing here? Wait, I know those markings on your suit. You’re from Black Mesa.” “You race.. hamsters...?” “Long story short, hamster flavored coffee didn’t sell too well, and we had tons of hamsters left over.” “I don’t even know what to think about that.” “Back on topic, what are you doing here?” The ninja didn’t reply, and instead, threw a pickle, that looked like Celestia’s flank, on the ground. There was a brief moment of silence as they stared at the green object on the floor. “Er, that wasn’t suppose to happen,” the ninja said, while searching for his smoke bombs. “Pinkie! Sound the alarms!” Twilight shouted down the hall. “We got rid of the alarms to make room for the talkative rocks,” Pinkie shouted back down the hall. “Nice day we’re having I like chocolate ever been to space I want to be a kangaroo when I grow up,” one of the many talkative rocks rambled on about. There were 50 or so rocks dressed in various hats and ties. They all chatted constantly with each other in a large glass dome with many of the late night scientists writing down everything the rocks said. Needless to say, the scientists had a lot of paper. “Yeah, in retrospect that wasn’t a good idea,” Twilight said as the ninja finally threw down his smoke bombs. Smoke exploded into the room, blocking every inch of Twilight’s view. The ninja pushed past Twilight and ran down the hall. “You’ll never get me!” The ninja yelled. “Get back here!” Twilight yelled back, and ran after him. The ninja trotted into an unlabeled door, which as we all know, means bad things will happen. "You'll never find me here!" The ninja shouted before disappearing into the room. "The rave party for potatoes? Why is he going in there?" Twilight chased him into the room, to find bright flashing rainbow lights spin all over the room, with motionless potatoes laying on the flashing dance floor. Twilight examined the potatoes, expecting the ninja to hide as one. After a quick sweep, she spotted a white potato. "An albino potato?! He's mine!" Twilight grabbed the potato and ran out of the room. The ninja got up off the floor, and ran out of the room. But Twilight heard him, and dropped the potato to chase after the ninja. The camera panned to Pinkie, who watched after Twilight chase the ninja. "Author, stop calling that guy 'the ninja', it's getting annoying," Pinkie said to the camera. "Let's call him Steve. That was one of the names I was going to choose for Gummy."