Twilight is best Applejack

by Shyfire_

Chapter 3 - Best fucking idea ever!

Twilight was trying to catch her breath when she heard a low rumbling in the distance. For the past 20 minutes, she had been overwhelmed by how fucking boring - and thus, exciting - the idea of Applebucking season sounded. She had been prancing, screaming obscenities and doing loop-de-loop all at the same time non stop, and she finally had gotten exhausted enough that she stopped to rest a little.

The sound seemingly coming from the entrance grew louder and louder, and she soon recognized it as galloping hoof steps. Who could possibly be in such a hurry to get to this... farm thing?

She quickly got her response when she heard a shout "Twilight, what is wrong with you?"

"You know, you're SUPPOSED to stay with Oaky." she replied casually.

"Who the fuck is that?" Applejack basically shouted.

Instead of saying anything, too annoyed to say anything, Twilight quickly lit her horn.

"Twilight?" Applejack prompted her, worriedly.

Before she had a chance to hear any sort of reply, however, another flash of bright purple light sparked before her eyes, and she was back at the Golden Oak Library.

"...I swear, if this god forsaken pony does this one more fucking time, I'm gonna buck her out of there so hard she won't ever reach the ground." Applejack grumbled in mild displeasure.

--- *** ---

After leaving the Golden Oak Library through the already opened door, Applejack set off to find somepony to help her to understand what kind of acid Twilight was currently under. She had claimed to be... well, herself, actually. And she seemed to say that Applejack should be at the Golden Oak Library... What was that supposed to mean?

Luckily, she knew exactly who she wanted to see, and where to find her.

It wasn't hard to find the cyan pegasus these past few days. She was always sitting in that same corner of the street on her little cloud.
A few days ago, Cider season happened. Yeah, Cider season was very close to Applebucking season this year. Fuck you. Anyway ; after losing the race to Pinkie Pie and missing out on any drop of cider every single year, so much so that one could only guess how the fuck she even knew how it tasted ; this year, she had decided to take actions this year. The night before, she visited Pinkie Pie, and tazed her. She then attached the pink pony to the stairs of her house and knocked her unconscious with a mighty flap of her wing. Because of this, she finally succeeded in getting herself some cider, and she decided to take her revenge on Pinkie and all the other pony who dared get in the way of her and her precious cider by buying every single drop Applejack had for this season. AJ never complained, business was business.

Arriving at the specific corner of the street she wanted and looking up to find a cloud sitting pretty low, exactly where she expected it to be, she called: "Rainbow, ya got a minute?"

A loud "BUUURP" was heard, and Rainbow popped her head over her cloud to look at AJ, a cup of cider in her hoof. "Sure, what's up?"

"Ok, first off, don't you fucking dare do this in ma face again, and secondly ; Ah' think Twilight's losing it." she explained sheepishly.

"Yeah, as she always does" Rainbow replied chickenly.

"Ah' don't mean like that. *sigh* Basically, it seems like she think she's me and I'm her, or somethin'." AJ continued pigly.

"Wha-... really?", Rainbow said cowly.

"Yeah! That bitch just showed up to ma place, told me that her name was "Applejack", and then teleported me to the Golden Oak! And then when I rushed back there to get an explanation, she did it again!", Applejack finished poorly.

"...THAT FUCKING BITCH DID WHAT?", Rainbow shouted in mild annoyance.

"Right? Fucking bullshit!", Applejack agreed.

"OH MY FUCKING-" Rainbow exclaimed, before swooping down under AJ to get her on her back and flying at bullet speed towards Sweet Apple Acres, creating about 50 Sonic Rainboom in the process.

She was going to get to the bottom of this, whether Twilight wanted it or not.