//------------------------------// // Double Birthday (S1 E23) // Story: Unpleasant Correspondence 2 (My Little Pony: Reign of the Goddess-Queens) // by StormLuna //------------------------------// Dear Luster Dawn, Alright Luster, I know you screwed up the festival for my sister and I but you are getting a chance to redeem yourself. You see, our step-daughters, Princess Toolaroola and Princess Coconut Cream, have a birthday coming up and we have decided to hold it in Ponyville and I am demanding that you set it up. Also, I am going to make sure that Starlight doesn't have Bright Beam save the day in the event things were to go awry and she felt that she had to get things going right. Now I am going to be frank here, Toola and Coconut mean a lot to us and you better be nice to them. They are Alicorn princesses and if they were to do something to you for any reason, both of us would be elated. I personally hope that they do and so does Starlight. Unlike you, they are precious little angels and would never do anything wrong. Now be sure and get this right and if you can pull it off, maybe I will consider letting you come home and not force friendship on you since you don't like it. Have fun setting it up! Your Owner, Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle Dear Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle, Wait a minute, you two have step-daughters? What I would like to know is why the fuck you would just adopt two random ponies and turn them into Alicorns and make them princesses? You know something, that is flat out unfair! I am your protege and have done so much and while I hate to admit this, I think even Bright Beam would be more deserving than just a couple random ponies that you decided to adopt. Now I don't know whether to believe you or not about you going to let me come home when I pull this off but I suppose I will lower myself to doing something that is beneath me. Now you do know that if I succeed and you don't let me come home, I will have my father sue you for lying to me. Well I suppose I should get to work. Luster Dawn One Week Later Dear Luster, I can't believe it but you actually managed to pull this festival off without a hitch! Toolaroola and Coconut Cream absolutely loved it. I am happy that you got the whole town together to put together a festival worthy of Toola's and Coconut's greatness. Hell even Cozy Glow was well behaved which is shocking given her past and how much she still hates me for not being a good friendship teacher. Now as you know I said that you could come home if you put this together perfectly and you did. Now I was even starting the process of getting that study tower ready for you UNTIL I was going over your last letter and I noticed this. What I would like to know is why the fuck you would just adopt two random ponies and turn them into Alicorns and make them princesses. If you understood proper grammar, this is how it would have read. What I would like to know is why the fuck you would just adopt two random ponies, turn them into Alicorns and make them princesses. You see, when you make a list that involves multiple items like that, you use commas to separate the items with the exception of the second to last item and then the last item. You do not simply separate all of them with the word "and." Because of that, I have decided that you can not come home because you have to use grammar correctly to go on to what would be MY advanced studies up here. I'm sorry Luster, well not really, but you can't come home. You were so close! I should have known that even in succeeding in one thing, you would find a way to disappoint me in another. Oh well, maybe you can cast a seduction spell on Bunny Tracks and she can make you happy. I doubt it would work but you can always try! Laughing at You, Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle P.S. For your precious daddy to be able to sue me, we would have had to have a legal document. A mere statement in a letter won't get you anywhere and besides, no judge in his or her right mind would even take on a case against me so tough luck there! Fuck you Twibitch, Seriously? I pull off a perfect festival without the help of Starbitch's little angel and you won't let me come home over a simple grammatical error? You know something, that is flat out fucked up. I did what you wanted, pulled it off yet you still shit on me. I think I know why you did this though. It is a matter of you hating it that I don't support your incestuous relationship with your sister or you are still mad because I once didn't put enough icing on your cake. Once again I don't know why I fucking try. You treat me like shit, Spike is a disobedient asshole, Diamond Tiara threw me under the bus, I can't initiate Bunny Girl and Bright Beam is always fucking outshining me. The only pony out there who gives even a tenth of a shit about me is Cozy Glow and knowing what a schemer she is, I'm not sure if even she will always be on my side. I can see a day coming where she will stab me in the back and try to win over your favor and just to spite me, I could see you actually doing it. Well fuck this shit, I'm done with this letter. Cozy Glow and Spike are wanting to play this game called Ogres and Ouliettes and if I don't agree, they'll both make my life hell. Upset You Won't Let Me Come Home, Luster Dawn Dear Mom, We are very happy that you had that huge festival for us down in Ponyville. We must admit, it is a nice community and most of the ponies there are nice. We say most because that protege of yours, Luster Ditz is it, was complaining about you and Starlight adopting us. She continued to whine about us being Alicorns and being princesses. Then she made some sort of snide comment about you and Starlight loving each other. We told her that is how moms are, they love each other in many ways even if they are sisters! Anyway, thanks again for the festival but there is one more thing we think you should know. You know that pink pony with the balloons on her butt? She told us to ask you to please forgive all the fines you put on her and that annoying husband of hers. Neither one of us think you should do it simply because they are annoying. Your Step-Daughters, Toolaroola and Coconut Cream Girls, You're welcome and we are very happy that you enjoyed it. Don't worry about Luster, she is just the child of a couple rich ponies and was always used to being given everything on a silver platter until she got accepted into my school. Now regarding the party ponies, I will never forgive them of those fines because of the crimes they have committed against Equestria. Starlight and I will have to teach you about how some things damage the environment for you to fully understand it. Besides, if we let them off the hook that would be that much less money coming in to fund further festivals for you two. Love, Mom P.S. You don't have to call yourselves step-daughters, just call yourselves daughters.