Dear Twibitch,
Right now I am extremely pissed. Here I am, your protege, but I get excluded from an episode. I am supposed to be the star of this whole series yet I am getting tossed to the side in favor of Bunny Girl and that annoying squeaky voiced unicorn that can't sing worth shit. Curse that damn map, it should only send me and Diamond Tiara on missions! What made this all the worse is that my spell on Diamond wore off and now she only wants Silver Spoon again. Damn it, now I'm going to have to learn it better so I can cast a permanent spell on her.
Upset I was Excluded,
Luster Dawn
P.S. Oh well, it gave Cozy Glow and I some time to contemplate our return to Canterlot so we can retrieve what we need to render you and your buck sibling powerless and make us the most powerful ponies in existence.
Luster,
Alright, I've had it. You either start being formal with me or I'll come down there and drag your sorry ass up to Colgate and you sure the hell don't want that now do you? Guess what though, I don't give a shit that you were excluded. My incredibly sexy sister gets excluded a whole lot more than you and so does Bright Beam. Now quit your bitching with that or I'll haul you up here to Colgate as well and I know her and her friends would gladly tear you a few new assholes. Now quit your damn bitching and be formal with me, ok?
Your Owner,
Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle
P.S. I think it is hilarious that your spell wore off on Diamond Tramp. I know had Bright Beam cast that spell on her it would have been permanent but hey, unlike you, she does have standards and she doesn't need spells to keep the spa twins. She wows them with her assets and charm which is something you'll never have. Suck it up bitch, you'll just have to hoof yourself from now on!
Oh and by the way, what you are talking about is locked away so good that even your precious Cozy Glow could never find it. If we was to catch you, she'd go to the moon and you'd go to Colgate and I know you'd love what she'd do to you!
Goddess Queen Twilight Sparkle,
Well that map decided to put us up to a major test. It called us out to the border area between the land the diamond dogs call home and Abysinnia, home of the Abyssinians. What happened is that a couple diamond dogs climbed over the wall the Abyssinians secure their border with and tried to steal some gold from their treasury. Well they were taken captive and it was up to us to try and get those diamond dogs freed.
It was not nearly as easy as we thought. Those Abyssinians were making completely outlandish demands to free their captives and would not budge at all. They wanted to clear out half the diamond dogs' treasury but we finally got them talked down to 30% so we let those cats into the diamond dog capitol, they took what they wanted and released their captives. Before they would release them though, they forced the diamond dogs to sign something that stated if any other diamond dogs scaled the wall, they would turn them into cat food!
The Abyssinians did one more thing though, they militarized their side of the wall to keep anycreature from crossing it. Those cats seem to have a very large military and a very structured government while the diamond dogs hardly have any kind of government at all. We tried telling them they need some sort of government but they said setting one up would be too hard. They asked the Abyssinian king and queen to give them some ideas but they told them that their stupidity is not their problem. Talk about being mean.
Sincerely,
Sweetie Belle and Bunny Tracks
P.S. Those Abyssinians are so mean! Did you know that they will hunt cute little bunnies and eat them alive? They do the same to poor innocent squirrels, mice, rats and birds too. I don't think I want to have to put up with them anymore. -- Bunny Tracks
Dear Sweetie Belle and Bunny Tracks,
Well I am glad to see that you were able to complete your first map mission successfully. Yeah the diamond dogs and Abyssinians are quite different. You see, here is the thing. The Abyssinians are a world power (not as good as Equestria but still, a world power) because they have a strong government and an equally as strong military. I am shocked however that you were able to get the Abyssinians to reduce their demands though. I'm sure had Luster been sent on this, they would have either increased their demands or they would have simply attacked her and ate her alive. Hmmm....maybe the map will send her to have to deal with them sometime!
Oh and Bunny Tracks, I thought you would know that both cats and dogs are carnivorous. I would think you would know that they would hunt such creatures and eat them alive. You are just as bad as PETA Girl was when she forced a wolf in her sanctuary to eat carrots so he wouldn't eat an elephant....and she claimed to know so much about animals. I know you two are cousins but good grief, I didn't know you'd share her stupidity. The only difference between you two is that you don't have to worry about me wanting to get in your coat since I have my hot to trot sister. Hopefully next time the map won't send you to deal with carnivorous creatures.
Sincerely,
Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle