Johan hummed to himself as he walked through the aisles of Ponyville's grocery store pushing a small cart. He was currently in the dairy aisle picking up some milk. His cart had a couple of necessities in it. Raisen Bran, some tarts, a bag or two of chips, popsicles for the occasional happy moment, fruits, veggies, and more.
Johan would have grabbed himself some meat, but since he was now a deer eating meat felt wrong. Like it actually made him sick. Derek could still eat meat though. Probably because he was half Gryphon. Except he wasn't. He was a third at best.
Johan growled as he grabbed a jug of 1% milk from one of the fridges in the aisle. He looked at it, glancing at the expiration date before shrugging it and tossing it into his cart. He closed the door and turned, instantly coming face to face with a minty green unicorn with white hair.
Her face was an inch away from his.
Johan jumped back with a frightened shout. He landed at least seven or eight feet back from her. One of only about half a dozen good things about being a deer. He could jump well.
Johan blinked a couple of times as she stared at the unicorn who approached him with a smile. "You're Joe-an right? Oh, it is so cool to meet you! My name is Lyra!" She asked excitedly, grabbing him by the hoof and shaking it with enough force to make Johan dizzy.
Johan stared at her confusedly. "Uh... It's pronounced Yo-han. Not Joe-an..." He raised an eyebrow as he observed the unicorn up and down. "S-sorry, I am not used to meeting people who are excited to meet me..."
Lyra laughed, a bit too heavily he noted and shrugged. "Sorry, I have only ever seen your name written."
"Yeah... I see where you can get Joe-an from that..." Johan said as he suspiciously eyed her. He knew what usually came next, he sighed as he grabbed his cart. "Anything I can interest you in? An autograph maybe?"
"Actually, I was wondering if maybe you could introduce me to your friend, Derek?" Lyra asked with glee in her voice.
Johan rolled his eyes and sighed. "You and everyone else in Equestria, ma'am." Johan said as he pushed his cart past her.
"Well, it's just that, Derek is really cool and, ya know? So I really want to meet him! I even heard he was human before!" Lyra said excitedly.
"I was human too," Johan said as he exited the aisle.
"Yeah well, he still has hands..." The unicorn said gesturing to the hooves Johan now had. That was a very sensitive subject for Johan! He missed the ability to actually pick things up. What he wouldn't give to have arrived as a gryphon or a unicorn...
"So about meeting Derek?"
"Look, lady!" Johan suddenly snapped, pointing directly at her. "Just because I know Derek doesn't mean I can introduce everyone who asks me to him!"
Everything in the crowded story suddenly went quiet. He looked around, quickly noticing why. All the color drained from his face.
An entire crowd of pony shoppers was gathered around him. Too many to count. He seemed to have wandered into the most crowded part of the story. He barely had a moment to step back before they set upon him.
"You know Derek? What's he like?"
"Is Derek really as cool as he looks when he fights?"
"Is it true that Derek is the fasted pony alive?"
"Can Derek really bench press an entire train car?"
Johan found himself hyperventilating as his escape paths were cut off as more and more ponies surrounded him.
"Derek is so cool!"
"What was Derek like before he came to Equestria?"
"Why is it that Derek is so cool while you are just a deer?
"Derek!"
"Derek!"
"Derek!"
Johan couldn't take it anymore. He reared back and screamed.
"Shut up! All of you! Leave me the hell alone!" He shouted, his cry drowning out the crowd. He stood there, inhaling and exhaling rapidly to try and calm himself down. All of their eyes were still on him. Some looked shocked, others looked betrayed. Some just looked downright angry, especially Lyra.
The crowd started to disperse annoyed tones leaving scathing messages behind for him.
"Sweet Celestia what a dick."
"No wonder everyone says Derek is cooler."
"Why is Derek even friends with that guy?"
One particularly angry shopper took it upon himself to rear back and give Johan's cart a firm buck, which threw it to the ground and spewed the contents all over the place.
The Deer sighed and bent down after everyone had gone back to his business. After putting the cart back up he went about slowly putting everything back.
"Great, all of the chips are going to be shattered now." He mumbled to himself before noticing the milk jug had broken when it hit the ground spilling white liquid all over the tile ground of the store. The deer hung his head and sighed. He looked around, there was nothing to wipe it up with.
Johan sighed and stood up, looking around he left his cart and quickly walked off to find a paper towel or something to wipe it up. When he returned, however, he found it already wiped up somehow?
Great, a clerk probably cleaned it all up for him. Said clerk also probably thought that Johan made the mess and just ran off leaving them to clean it up like some kind of an entitled jerk. That made him feel terrible.
Johan grabbed his cart and turned it around, going back to the milk aisle. Instead, he once again found himself face to face with a unicorn. She was a white unicorn with mostly pink hair, though it did also include a white stripe down the middle. She had a face that was much... broader than most other mares, and her cutie mark was that of a Fleur De Lis. She was carrying a milk jug, in her golden magical aura, 1%, just like the jug he lost.
"Let me guess? Here to ask me to introduce Derek to you like everyone else, huh?" Johan growled, trying to get past her.
"Actually, Mr. Johan, I was actually just interested in giving you this." She said with a smile as she put the jug of milk into his cart. "I noticed how mean those ponies were being to you and I thought it would be nice of me to help you with your little issue."
A genuine smile came to her face as she stuck her hoof out to him. "Fleur De Lis at your service. I come from Canterlot and I decided that I might as well check out this little town. After all, Princess Celestia's prized pupil and her friends live here. Must be a nice town right?"
Johan blinked twice. He reached his hoof forwards and took hers, giving it a light shake. "Um... Johan. But I think you already knew that..."
"Charmed," Fleur said with a smile. Johan noticed her... wink at him?
Johan let go and took a step back a blush coming to his face as Fleur turned and started walking away, an obviously exaggerated sway in her step.
"See you later cutie." She said as she started to turn a corner.
"W-wait! Wait!" Johan said quickly rushing after her. She stopped in her tracks and looked back at him with a smile.
"I-I was wondering, uh... well... I know this is awkward since we just met but..." A blush came to Johan's face as he stumbled over his words.
"But...?" Fleur said with a wider smile.
"Well... my friend Derek is having this double date with someone and, well... he wants me to get someone to go with me and..." Johan stopped again and sighed looking at his hooves. This was ridiculous.
Fleur simply patted him on the head and chuckled. "Let me guess, you want me to come and be your date for it?" She asked with a smile.
"Y-yeah... I know it's kind of stupid. I'll go now..." He mumbled as he turned to walk away.
"I'd love to," Fleur said patting him on the head. "I'm staying at a house near the Golden Oak's library. Come pick me up before the date. I'll be sure to wear my finest dress."
Johan stared after her, completely mystified, as she walked out of the aisle and then out of the store. As soon as she was gone, Johan couldn't help but feel a giddy smile come to his lips. He let out an excited cheer, as he rushed back to his cart and prepared to rush to check out.
He had to get ready asap! Finally, someone who liked him for a reason other than Derek, and she was going on a date with him!
Johan stood in front of Fleur De Lis's rented house with a smile on his face as he held a bundle of flowers in one of his forehooves. He was wearing a black tuxedo with a red bowtie as well as a small boutonnière in the shape of a rose. (For those of you who can't speak fancy, a boutonnière is a small flower you put in one of the front pockets of a tuxedo's coat.)
He had to cash in quite the large favor to Rarity to get it, mainly because he didn't have enough money to actually buy the suit. He was basically just renting it from Rarity. Suffice to say he would be taking care of Opal for the next couple months when she was out of town, on top of modeling for a lot her future suits for deer... not that there were many deer asking for suits. He had never actually met another deer before but apparently, they did, indeed, exist.
He let out a deep breath before knocking on the door happily. After a minute or two of waiting, the door opened and the White Unicorn herself stood in the door, a smile on her face. She wore a stunning Red Dress and perfect makeup with accentuated her already stunning features.
Johan felt his jaw drop as Fleur stepped out from the door frame. "Well, glad to see you didn't leave me hanging... unlike your jaw." She joked, placing a hoof on his chin and lightly closing it for him.
"O-oh... S-sorry I've just never..." Johan started, before being cut off.
"Seen a mare this good before? Of course my friend, I carry that perfect Cantlerlot style. Now then, if you would, let us head to the restaurant. It is not exactly nice to leave your date standing in the cold." She suddenly said with a slight tinge of annoyance.
Johan stared at her with a raised eyebrow and sudden confusion, but he just shrugged. He must have just caught her at a bad time...
"Oh, sure. This way," he said with a smile, leading her towards the location of the date.
It was a small restaurant near the Ponyville train station, it was actually quite famous in Equestria for serving a mix of Canterlot and Ponyville culinary convections. it was also quite famous for its sweet tasty pies and desserts, all of which came from the nearby Sweet Apple Acres.
Johan was the first to arrive, happily holding open the door for Fleur, who kind of just rushed past him without a thank you. Again, Johan just chalked it up to her not liking the cold.
Johan quickly noticed Derek and Twilight Sparkle near the back of the room, sitting at a table that was half booth, half chairs. Derek and Twilight sat across from each other, Derek taking the booth, and Twilight taking a chair. Twilight suddenly threw her head back in a boisterous laugh at one of Derek's, presumably weak, jokes.
Derek wore a suit of black plate armor. Yes, actual armor. He wore that instead of a suit because 'it looked really cool.' Twilight on the other hand, just wore the dress rarity made her. It really highlighted her general look. Rarity was good at that.
Johan turned to Fleur. "There's our... table..." He started, noticing that Fluer had already rushed past him, already heading towards the table.
Johan frowned slightly, following after her. 'Well that's kind of rude.' he thought to himself.
Johan also noticed that she took the booth seat, sitting right next to Derek. Now that definitely raised some red flags.
"Hey hey, Johan! Glad you could make it man! And who's this? Heheh, didn't expect you to pick up such a fine little mare..." Derek said winking at her with a smile. Twilight huffed but ultimately laughed it off. She was used to Derek flirting with every mare he saw.
Johan glared at him before turning his gaze to watch Fleur as he took his own chair, quickly opening the menu... nothing really looked all that appealing, to be honest. The menu had lots of weird foods on it that he, just plain didn't understand.
Escargot de druid? Soupe à l’oignon? Cerf rôti? All of it flew right over his head. He'd just settle on the food he recognized the most. Prench Toast. He smiled as he set down the menu.
The second he put down his menu though, he noticed something that made his heart sink. Directly in front of him, without even trying to hide it, Fleur was practically hanging off Derek.
"Oh ho Derek. You are such a tease," she giggled as Derek laughed. He quickly retreated though.
"Yo Fleur, this feels kind of wrong. I mean, you came here with Johan after all." Derek said turning his gaze to Johan. A slight smile came to Johan's face at that... maybe Derek was going to play nice on this date after all!
"Ah don't worry about it. Johan is just a friend, right Johan?" She asked staring the deer right in the eyes. "I asked him to take me on this date so I would have the pleasure of meeting you."
Johan's jaw dropped as he looked to Twilight. She didn't seem to mind all that much, although she did throw a concerned look at him.
"B-b-but..." Johan stammered but Fleur ignored him.
"I think Mr. Derek, after this date, me, you and Twilight should go back to your place. Have a little fun... just the three of us?" She winked.
Derek's eyes widened and a smile came to his face. "Well shit! A three-way? Nice! You ok with that Twilight?" he asked quickly turning his gaze to his purple unicorn date.
"I-I mean... I am not against the idea... but don't you think this is a little unfair?" Twilight asked rubbing one of her arms.
"Unfair? To who?" Derek asked wrapping a hoof around Fleur. Suddenly, two hooves slammed themselves onto the table, followed by a bang.
All eyes in the room were suddenly on Johan, who had stood up fast enough to knock his chair to the ground. He stared angrily at Derek. His eyes felt watery and he felt his teeth clench with enough force that he felt like they might crack.
Derek looked at him with confusion, like the inconsiderate asshole he was. Twilight with more of her faux-concern and Fleur just stared at him angrily, as if asking 'how dare you ruin this for me?' She just wanted to use him to get close to Derek. That is what always happens. That is the only reason he existed, to be a stepping stone for people to use to get close to Derek!
Johan opened his mouth to start screaming at him, but he was silenced quickly by a hoof on his back.
Two waiters suddenly came up behind him.
"Sir, I'd ask if you didn't make a scene..."
Johan glared at them. "Don't worry. I was just leaving."
The deer wrested himself clear of the two waiters and stomped out of the building. Then he kept going, even when it started to rain. He didn't stop walking until he made it to his house. He threw open the door and walked inside, slamming it shut behind him. He quickly threw himself onto his couch.
No matter how much he tried to be strong then, he couldn't hold himself back. He broke down, crying silently into his hooves.