Obsidian: Shards Of Sombra

by Randimaxis


One: Madam Librarian

Equestria.

The bold and beautiful jewel of Equus. The land of ponies. The shining example of friendship for all the world to see and experience.

But for all its' majesty and wonder, Obsidian found the Royal Library of Twilight Sparkle to be just as beautiful as any flowers or forests the land may have... especially with the discovery this morning of a small stash of books, hidden well in a secret compartment beneath the desk in the back office.

It had been completely by accident, and was discovered while cleaning up. There were three books - two of them were Dark Magic focus tomes, specializing in no exact spells, but the energies and concentrations and how to achieve them. These would take a while to decypher, she could tell.

The third book was her late sister Onyx's personal diary, bound by a steel strap and locked with a thick black padlock.

As soon as she realized that she'd found something special, it immediately piqued her interest. Of course, she originally thought it was something else; maybe that dull sound she heard when she poked around in this drawer was just a sign that she had rats in her desk? But no - she had found a real treasure!

Padlock... hmmmm. Was it possible her sister had placed a curse on it, or perhaps a nasty spell protecting it? It was already hidden, along with these Dark Magic books, so anypony that would find it would already be rather suspicious about its content. Considering that a normal padlock could be destroyed with even the simplest offensive spell, it would make a sense to give it additional, magical protection.

And focus books... ooooh, it was just wonderful! Maybe she could finally learn more about the theories behind the Dark spells!

"This day is going to be perfect... the kind of day which I've dreamt of since I was small," hummed Obsidian, clearly happy at her findings. Not only did she have these books - but also a hidden drawer for her own use. Perfect!

"Though my father had a fate rather tragic, I can finally start to learn more about his hidden magic! And THEN, who'll be the best and brightest sibling? HA!"

She could just work overtime... or perhaps even sleep here for a day or two; nopony would complain that she never took her duties very seriously, right? Even better, she wouldn't have to hurry for lessons - after all, she would be already in the school itself! She just had to find a way to wash up, as a library obviously didn't have bath or anything like that. Maybe there was a spell for tooth-brushing...

The library had been rather quiet today; most of her time had been taken up by the aging mailmare, who'd been trying to deliver a package... but had continuously put it in the wrong places, and Obsidian had almost lost her patience with the cross-eyed mare until she finally discovered she'd had it with her all along. Why couldn't disintegration be legally allowed for annoying postal workers?

At any rate, the package had turned out to be - big surprise! - more books, so she'd had to list them, label them and place them on the shelves. As today had been rather slow, it hadn't taken long. Now, it was just her, her new finds, and nothing el-

"Umm... excuse me?"

sigh Never mind.

"Yes?" She gave her best patiently-trained-smile number three, 'I'm all ears, and helping you is my greatest desire!'

The changeling on the other side of the desk looked at her for a moment. "Hey, I remember you... you're... Obsidian, right?"

He... remembered her? Where had she met a changeling before? Or did he know her from the heroic acts she'd performed with her friends?

Obsidian tapped her chin. Changeling, changeling... "Mark...?" Or something like that - she'd asked him to be her friend, right?

His smile lit up his strange face. "That's right - Markannus! I'm pleased you recall my name; I admit, I didn't think I left such an impression on you. You were among others who tend to be more... memorable than I am. Still, a pleasant surprise to see you here. And on the other side of the desk, I see."

He looked around a bit. "And such a sweet gig, as well. Lucky you. Well, such as it is, I'm actually here to find some books on genetic biology structure and molecular similarity; any chance you happen to know where those are, or am I out of luck?" He seemed genuinely pleased to interact with her... had she made a friend out of him?

Of course, Obsidian had no idea how changeling mentality worked - they were obviously not ponies, but they'd reformed. It also wasn't much help that she didn't exactly know how any creature's mentality worked. But she was learning quickly.

"Well, a number of things have happened since then," she said diplomatically. Two attempts on her life, a zombie invasion, followed by a second zombie invasion, a brief occupation of the entire area, King Sombra's return...

Oh, right. Genetic structure. "That would most likely be in the Biology section. Let me help you..." She left her place behind the desk to lead him further into the library. It might take a while, obviously, but she was sorting the books so often that she was sure she could find what he was looking for quickly.

"I hope you didn't have too many problems during the invasion?" Obsidian attempted some small-talk.

Markannus sighed. "Well, that depends on whom you ask; my hive locked its' doors tight and ran defense for the southern end of Ponyville - or, in other words, we kept the damnable things from leaving town, and kept the nearby towns safe. Well, safer, anyway. But the things were nasty, I'll say THAT much."

"But if you ask the ponies of Ponyville, well... they might say we just stayed outside of town and did nothing. But they don't know about what we did. About the ones we lost defending the southern border..." He shook his head. "Still, the things didn't get past us, so we did what we were trying to do. It wasn't pretty, but it did the job. You, on the other hoof... well, almost everyone knows your story, thanks to Thunderclap."

So the Umbrals weren't focused on overrunning Ponyville's defenses? Surprising, considering how many losses they suffered (since the entire first wave was completely wasted by Siddy's own spell), and that Onyx wanted to bring back their father as soon as possible; attacking other places seemed like she might have made a strategical blunder. Of course Onyx herself had made quite a few mistakes, so it could be just another one of them she hadn't thought about.

"Oh yes, Clap is perfect for spreading stories around," Obsidian agreed. "You should talk with her more about what happened with your hive; get her motivated, and soon we will all hear how brave you all were!" The textbooks about genetics were somewhere around here...

He chuckled lightly. "Naaaaaah... it's not that important; we did what we did, and we're just happy we could help. No big deal." The third shelf that held the scientific books was the one she was looking for. There were a few books with the words 'genetics' on them, but nothing so specific as he'd mentioned.

Markannus just grinned when he saw the shelf. "Yeah, those'll do nicely - thanks." He began looking over the titles, then turned back to face her. "Well, I suppose it would only be proper of me to ask how you're doing as well, right? What IS it like to be a minorly-lauded hero?"

"Far more peaceful and lazy than trying to survive a war with the undead," she said. In fact, it was almost boring. Not that she was complaining, at least not seriously - the day that started with Tourmy's attack and ended with a fight with her own father was too exciting for her own tastes. It would have been far easier if Onyx would have limited her attacks on her - one per day or something.

"... considering Princess Twilight's own history, I have to defend Equestria at least three times more to become a pretty alicorn princess," she said with a perfect poker face.

Markannus actually laughed. "That's a good one! I'm glad to see you have a wry sense of humor; far better than the pale and somewhat juvenile jokes I hear out of most ponies - thank you for being a bit more sophisticated."

He selected three books from the shelf (and SHE had three books to look at, waiting for her), and tuned to her. "These will do the job properly, I'm sure. I suppose you have to check them out, and I'll have my study material. Say," he looked at her with piqued interest, "do you study much?"

Was he being friendly, or was he just buttering her up? No, there was no reason to be paranoid; the last ponies that tried to kill her were toiling in her home, robbed of their magic and forced to obey their rightful queen lovely sister. If anypony would try to get under her skin, she'd just get new slaves involuntary friends out of it!

"The entire time - and I still have plenty to catch up on. History, literature, science... quite a lot of things have happened during the past thousand years." She still had no idea who this 'Daring Do' was, though considering all the references she had heard about her exploits since her awakening in this strange modern world, it was sort of irksome.

"That's right," his muzzle took on a more sympathetic look, "you're still adjusting to the modern world around you. Sorry, I didn't think before I asked, or I'd have realized it was a foolish question - consider it unasked."

He then grew thoughtful. "You know, I'd be happy to help out, should you ever want to study sciences and biology; I did a lot of study myself, growing up. It'd be no trouble, and would probably help out with your quest to discover this future you were kind of shoved into." He seemed to genuinely be concerned for her education; was he one of those 'eggheads' Clap kept joking about?

Truth be told, Obsidian wasn't honestly too interested in biology - wasn't it mainly about animals, plants and so on? It really didn't sound like anything that would be useful to her. Science, however, was far more interesting; it was mainly about things that were unknown in her own time, so despite the fact that it was rather diffcult (or maybe because of it, as she kind of enjoyed such a challenge), she was catching up to it a bit.

"I'll keep it in mind... but right now, I'm fine - though I thank you for the offer." And she even had a nice source of income... no more worries about debt, and she didn't even have to spend a dime on books!

"Anything else I can do for you?" She had to make a note about his borrowing the biology books - after all, she had to keep her workplace organized.

He grinned and shook his head. "Nope - just these. I already know most of what's in here - I'm just giving myself a refresher before tests tomorrow."

Putting them away in a knapsack, he looked at her again. "I'll have to remember you're in here, and come by to say hello more often. That is, if you'd like? There are still some who don't care for my kind, Reformation or not, but I figure you wouldn't be so inclined, seeing as your days precede the shenanigans of Chrysalis."

From the front doors, Obsidian saw Thunderclap poke her head in and wave... then she noticed Markannus and, with a shushing hoof to her lips, began to sneak up on him.

The changeling smiled at her. "Still, would you rather I come by to say hi, or no?"

Thunderclap's plans usually ended in a rather... surprising way. Sometimes a bit destructive, which, considering that they weren't fighting for their lives, meant that Obsidian had no reason to warn the changeling. In theory, libraries should be quiet...

But there was no issue with something a bit more exciting than usual. "It's a public library, I couldn't stop you even if I would like to. Luckily, I don't think it's a problem - I'm even fairly certain you could hang out with our entire gang from time to time, methinks."

He grinned. "Oh, you mean The Siddy Six?" Chuckling, he looked at her. "I believe that's the name I've heard going around; yourself, Mica Chip, Cupcake Sprinkles, Gypsy Rover, Stalwart Stance and... oh, who IS that last one?"

Behind him, Clap got an offended look on her muzzle, and redoubled her efforts to sneak up behind Markannus. However, when she got close-

"BRRRRRRRAAAAAAGHH!!!!!" The changeling suddenly shifted into a manticore, then turned and roared right in Clap's face - and she squealed, and backpedaled across the floor to the far wall.

Markannus chuckled. "Oh, that's right... and Thunderclap Dash."

Clap glared at him. "Oh, HA HA, Markus," she grumbled.

The 'Siddy Six'? What was this nonsense? And, of course, Clap's sneaking attempts turned out to have very interesting results... though perhaps a bit louder than Obsidian would initially like. But at least she learned a valuable lesson about a changeling's shapeshifting skills.

"Yes, I mean us... and hello, Clap. Say Markannus, did you hear her or was it that you felt her emotions...?"

He smiled. "She's no ninja, that's for sure - her manicured hooves made too much noise."

Clap pouted. "You just wanted to see me jump, didn't you?"

Markannus turned and fixed her with a kind smile. "Well... didn't you want to see ME jump?"

She huffed, "That's not the point!"

The changeling turned to Obsidian again and smiled. "Anyway, sometime when I'm not studying, yeah - I wouldn't mind hanging out with you folks. You're all a very diverse group of friends, and you all seem interesting... especially you, Miss Dash."

Clap walked over to the desk and leaned on it, making it creak a little bit under the weight of her muscular frame. "Yeah, I'll bet - you just keep your shapeshifting to yourself, okay?"

"As long as you try not to scare me, I won't have to return the favor," he chuckled.

At that, even Clap rolled her eyes and grinned. "Yeah, okay - deal, I guess. Besides, it'd be WAY more fun to catch Siddy unawares!"

Markannus turned and trotted for the door. "Nice seeing you again, Obsidian! Thanks for the help!"

Once he left, Clap leaned in close. "So really, was I making that much noise?"

Obsidian waved to the changeling as he was leaving. Interesting encounter... but it made her wonder; did she forget any other creatures she'd met at the beginning of her new life here?

"I'd say not really, but I can't say that my hearing is perfect, either. Maybe his ears are just better than mine?" Obsidian shrugged slightly. Her father apparently hadn't cared so much about that aspect when he was creating her. Too bad, as having some kind of ultra-super-hearing would have been kind of cool. "So, Clap, what brings you into my dark kingdom of knowledge?" Of course, she was joking... the Dark magic could wait a bit longer.

She grinned, "What, I need a reason to come visit my pal Siddy?" She started wandering the library's front area, looking around. "So, I kinda figured you might be up for that 'spa day' I was telling you about? I mean, if anyone needs a little relaxation around here, it'd be YOU, Sids - besides, a Girl's Day Out might be a good thing for us, y'know?" She smiled slyly at Obsidian. "Oh yeah, and you gotta help me convince Warty to go, too. She's stubborn, but I think the two of us could wear her down!"

"Well, she already promised that she would protect me from any possible evils and dangers of this 'Spa' - and she's not exactly the type to break a promise, right? Give me a moment, I just need to finish a few things..."

Clap's grin doubled. "GREAT, Siddy! I knew I could count on you to back me up! This is gonna be SOOOOOO good, you'll see!" She continued to walkabout looking at things, but now it seemed to be more a matter of killing time than actual interest in the books... of course, that was Clap for you; no time for much other than what she thought was best. But one couldn't really blame her - she was just excited to be doing stuff with her friends.

"C'mon, Sids," she said after only a minute, "daylight's a-wastin'!"

"I need a bit more time, Clap. Just be patient, or I'll use the most terrifying secret skill I've recently perfected..." Ok, first she had to write down the books which had been borrowed by Markannus, then hide Onyx's secret stash of books back in the hidden drawer, then close the library...

Clap turned and looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "Really? Heck, I'll just Sonic Rainboom my way outta here... you remember that, right? How I did that? You shouldn't forget I did something that awesome, y'know - it'd be hard for you to keep up with that one, Sids."

Ugh. That again. Since she'd pulled it off, Clap had the feeling that folks had to be reminded of her big accomplishment at least twice a day. Frankly, the whole group was beginning to find it annoying, but with as hard as she'd trained and tried for it, nobody had the nerve to tell her to quit; she was legitimately proud of the deed, and should have been.

It would be nice if she didn't BRAG about it so often, though.

Obsidian just pointed at the doors. There was a very distinct and fresh sign:

[Sonic Rainbooms FORBIDDEN inside the library]

After all, doing such a thing could ruin the shelves.

"But I see you want to experience my Dark secret, then," Obsidian gave a wicked smirk, "and so, you have sealed your fate..."

She reached for her desk to get the one thing she needed for her secret skill... a pair of thick horn-rimmed glasses, with slightly pointy endings to make them look bigger and more intimidating. She didn't actually need them - her eyes were completely fine - but she still remembered how Onyx had looked as Miss Tome, when she was pretending to be a normal librarian pony and wanted to emulate that effect.

LIBRARIAN... TRANSFORMATION... POWER!

In her own humble opinion, it worked perfectly - she looked at least twenty years older in these glasses... maybe even thirty! She took on a severely dull and flat expression and gave Thunderclap a small glare, speaking to her in an equally dull and flat voice. "Miss Dash, I need to ask you to behave, please."

No, Obsidian completely didn't practice this in front of a mirror - that would have been just plain silly, right? RIGHT? Okay, so maybe she did. Just a bit. Every morning. At least twice, for good measure.

Clap got a crestfallen look on her muzzle... but the gleam in her eye told Siddy she was pleased to see her friend having her own fun with her; in a way, things like this were more personal than heartfelt conversations.

"Awwwww..." she groaned, pretending to be disappointed. "You're no fun."

She went and sat at one of the nearby tables, leaning back in one of the chairs until it creaked under her size. "Well, c'mon spoilsport - we still gotta convin-... I mean, uh, 'pick up' Warty from her shift."

Stalwart Stance had religiously stuck to her schedule in the Royal Guard, and was very, VERY clear that she would only leave her post for her friends in an emergency; otherwise, once her shift was over, she tended to come straight to the library anyway. In fact, Wart hadn't missed a single day yet; she was always here, with Siddy, after every duty. At first, it seemed like she just didn't have anything else to do... but over time, Obsidian had come to realize that she had been completely honest when the tiny mare had called her 'the best friend ever', and was simply happy to be around Siddy.

Clap sighed. "I can feel myself aging; hurry up!"

Now wait a second... did she intend to convince Stalwart to cut her guard duty short? Wasn't that a crime? "You are fully aware that we won't be able to convince her to leave her post even a single minute too early, right? At least not without monsters attacking Equestria or something?" Ok, books written into the system; now she just had to check her secret stash and she was ready to go.

Clap grinned. "Yeah, I know - I reserved a spa time for after her shift ended - but that doesn't mean we can't have fun teasing her for, like, the last five minutes of her shift!" Clap leaned back farther in the chair, and the creaking became a wooden groaning; she did this often, and had even gotten close to falling over. However, her wings had caught her before she teetered too far - to date, she had yet to actually hit the floor. But she'd still made the chairs protest, mostly due to her size.

It seemed everything was fine... the stash was amazing to Obsidian. It was a very useful thing, even without planning anything dark and scary - she could hide money, a diary, photos in swimsuits (she didn't have any, but she still remembered the reactions of the others when they found Clap's photo in the dreamscape) and so on. In fact, she put her photo with all her friends at the top of her secret hiding place before closing it and putting a few normal books on top of it to keep it even more hidden.

It was a good photo. Made after the Umbral battle, so they didn't look like they were taken straight from Tartarus. It was almost as if they hadn't bonded during rather traumatic events. And, of course, Ponyville behind them didn't look ruined as well. "As long as she won't arrest us during her last five minutes..."

"groan Come oooonnnnn..." Clap began to rock from side to side in her chair, making it creak alarmingly.

"Stop torturing the chair, I'm done - we can leave now."

Clap stood up instantly. "FI-nally!"

The two of them made their way out of the school, which looked far better than it had after the Umbral Incident (as some folks referred to it); almost all the repairs were done, and the new coat of paint was looking better and better as it was applied.

Today, Wart's assignment had seen her at Town Hall for Ponyville; Princess Twilight was speaking with the Mayor (Hardy Hello, if she recalled correctly - Mayor Mare's son, as others had informed her). Obsidian knew this because Wart had spoken of it just yesterday.

As they got into Ponyville proper, a number of ponies (and other creatures) waved to them as they passed; she'd seen quite a few locals who had already accepted her into their midst, and it was an interesting feeling, being included and welcomed by thers in such a manner.

"So hey, what books did the buggo want to check out? What were they about? Bug stuff? Magic? Cooking recipes?" Clap asked, curiosity writ large on her muzzle.

Once again, Obsidian marvelled at the fact she was able to save something, making the entire world a bit better place - this time she saved a chair. After all she was a HERO... and she had to admit that making a mare literally named "Mayor" the mayor made a lot of sense. She was starting used to visiting the cozy little village - it was a far cry from her first shopping trip, where she was literally clinging to the rest of the group, suffering a mild panic attack and wondering why would so many ponies walk around. Obsidian still didn't like walking out alone and pretty much preferred to sit down in one of her hideouts (whether it was the library, the school proper or her home), but in company... it was acceptable.

Buggo? Ah, Markannus... "Genetics and molecules. He was very interested in biology and science, apparently as much as Gypsy is in history."

"Really? He's an egghead? Good grief," she groaned and rolled her eyes, "I thought he'd be waaaaaay cooler than that. So disappointed..."

Reaching the Town Hall, they saw two Royal Guards standing outside, at full attention. One of them was a tall and strong-looking stallion who wore his armor impeccably well, and looked ready to strike at a single moment's notice; a soldier at the peak of his physical condition, and trained to do his job extremely efficiently.

And the other one was Wart - which meant the other guard paled in comparison.

As they stepped forward to them, the stallion spoke up. "Citizens! Be aware that Princess Twilight Sparkle is having an audience wi-"

"Brass, they already know - I told them about it," Wart said, unmoving save for her mouth.

"Stalwart, what if they're spies?"

Wart now gave a smirk. "Then we shall turn them to powder - but I think you are simply being paranoid, Brass; let it go."

Brass eyed them a moment, then nodded. "Very well, then. If you trust them, Stalwart, then so shall I."

Wart, stiff as a statue, spoke to them. "Lady Siddy. Clap."

Clap grinned widely. "Hiya, Warty... I'll bet you'd love to accompany us to the spa, riiiiiiiiiight?"

Wart's stone face twitched. "Pointless. Something such as that is a waste of time and bits."

Clap grinned. "You only say that 'cause you've never been... y'know, Siddy's coming with me."

Wart's eyes slid over to look at Obsidian. "Is this true?"

Now Obsidian couldn't help herself but wonder who would win in a duel - she or Stalwart. Of course, she wouldn't dream of winning a fair swordfight - but with magic? Who could say? In fact, maybe it would be a good idea to use that interesting relationship between them and ask Stalwart for a few fencing lessons. During Umbral invasion Obsidian managed to use her lance quite effectively, though eventually she settled on using magic, but her skills simply paled when compared to the whirling death that Stalwart turned herself into.

"Yes, Stalwart. I've already invited you, remember? Riiiiiight after you swore fealty to Equestria and the princess. You seemed to be pretty enthusiastic back then," Obsidian smiled a bit... though rather slyly. "I hope you already have crush on somecreature, because I'm sure we'll all look stunning afterwards. I'm sure Mica is already preparing himself to properly admire beautified Clap." Well, teasing is teasing, right?

Clap turned a shade of red. "H-hey... I'm just going so... w-well, it's... you sh-shut your mouth, Siddy!"

At that, even Wart and Brass grinned a bit. "Though I am... hesitant... to go to such a place, I... did swear, I suppose. I... sigh I suppose if I must." Clap, still blushing just a tad, looked back over at Obsidian.

"Oh yeah, we'll be pretty alright... nice and pretty, and nothing like dark or mysterious! Think about it, Sids - Cuppie will practically be a slave to how beautiful you're gonna look."

Wart, however, cast a glance at the ground, saying nothing else for the moment. She hadn't had any 'special somepony' in her entire life; during a conversation with Cupcake, he revealed to her that Wart had always been a loner, but never even seemed to try to find one. Yet she still seemed a bit put-off by it... however, she looked up and focused behind them in an instant.

"SIR!" the two guard trainees said in unison.

"Wart. Brass. And... Thunderclap and Obsidian, I see." That was the voice of Lemon Custard; Obsidian knew it fairly well by now.

He'd continued to check up on her on occasion, and had even given another training session or two, just to make certain she was getting her 'magical exercise', as he called it. It was funny; he'd been insulting and harsh with her when they first met, but now he treated her like an ally, if not a friend. Of course, he was still strict and stodgy... however, much less insulting. And of course, he was responsible for Wart achieving her dream, so there was that as well. There were two Royal Guards behind him, waiting at full attention.

"Come to gather your shadow, Obsidian?" It had been hard not to notice how much Wart hung around Siddy, so his little poke wasn't unexpected.

You know, telling a daughter of the most (in)famous slave driver in known history that her crush will be her slave didn't sound too nice, but Thunderclap was hardly known for her tact. And it seemed that her teacher had appeared, a complete pain in the plot... at least for ponies that he disliked. Luckily Obsidian already reached a point in her life where she could even enjoy his company. After all, she spent most of her life with a very strict and stodgy teacher... and rather violent, very hard to please, and so on; in comparison to Sombra's lessons, Lemon was practically soft on her.

"Of course. Aaaaany second now..." Obsidian smiled.

Lemon gave one of his rare grins, then turned to the guards behind him. "Thick Skull, Fighting Chance... switch out time. You know your duties." They both saluted Lemon, then stepped forward and stood next to Wart and Brass, wherein those two stepped away from their positions. Wart and Brass saluted their replacements, who both returned the gesture and took up the same stance their previous fellow guards has held.

Lemon nodded, then glanced over at Clap. "When you get the chance, let my brother know I have a want to speak with him, if you would," his gaze turned to Siddy, "or you, if you see him first. Frankly, between the two of you, there's no telling which one."

Clap grinned. "Yeah, I'll let him know; Sids will too."

Lemon lifted an eyebrow, but nodded all the same. He then turned to Obsidian. "Keeping your magic in shape?" Wart naturally fell in behind Obsidian, as usual.

Send Cupcake to Lemon. Easy enough, considering how much time per day Obsidian was 'cupcaking', he should find her on his own sooner or later. To be frank, it was also possible that he will just bump into Lemon. Or just appear here and now, almost as if he teleported. Or...

A lot of things were possible with Cupcake. However, Obsidian was surprised that Lemon asked Clap first, not her. After all she was snuggling with him, right? They even lived in the same house, were sleeping in the same bed... in fact Obsidian was starting to feel it might be a bit strange, but that was a completely different issue. "Of course - I have to."

"Good. I'll have to stop in sometime, test your skill progression; I'm intrigued to see where your Grey Magic grows stronger." He nodded to the guards at their post, who responded with a salute and a "SIR!"; he then looked over at Wart. "Same time tomorrow, of course. Palace duty."

She saluted smartly. "Of course, sir."

Nodding, he turned and headed inside, the guards opening and closing the door for him.

Wart now looked at them both. "May we at least go by my house, so I may keep my armor clean?"

Clap rolled her eyes, sighed, and grumped, "Yeah, yeah... but let's HURRY. I am dying for a good hooficure!"