This was not how things were supposed to turn out, not at all. Sure, almost everything happened the way I wanted it to, but the ONE thing that I needed to go my way DIDN’T go my way. By that, of course, I mean that the filly is still in my possession.
Fucking Twilight Sparkle, I’m so not fond of her right now. I went to her, just as I said I would, with that filly riding in Carty, an experience she really enjoyed it appears, and then Twilight just up and decides to be useless to me. At first she’s all shocked and curious that the issue I’m consulting with her about is the one that it is. I don’t blame her for that one, I had never expected to have to do deal with some runaway filly, but the least she could’ve done was actually HELP. No, Twilight did a little examination on the filly, so as to determine if she was healthy or not, and then informed me that she would ask around town about anypony missing a filly. Shouldn’t be so hard, right? WRONG! As it turns out, my schedule finally turned on me and the nerd told me that the filly would have to stay with somepony for another night due to how late it was. She offered her home to the brat and you know what the filly did? That stupid little foal clung to my leg and cried. Yep, cried. So, until tomorrow at least, I’m stuck with her.
Celestia help me that crying crap got old quickly, but there’s nothing that could be done about it. If giving Twilight some time to find this twerp’s family will get her off my hooves, then I’m all for suffering until tomorrow.
What’s that, Booky? Didn’t I have something important to do with Twilight other than the brat? Why yes, I did! Thanks for reminding me! That earns you one brownie point! You’re almost there, bucko!
After getting the filly to shut up (I had to sing in order to quiet her. Well, it was more like mumbling, but you get the point.) I began to conduct business as usual with Twilight. Her reaction to my having the books was hilarious. That stupid mug of hers held a look of pure confusion until the annoyance began to peak through her features. Seeing that, I immediately sprung the surprise that she would only be getting three of the four books back by way of bits. The last one would be free of charge but came with the conditions I told you about last daynight. To put it bluntly, she was not amused. She tried to lecture me about the morals of my actions but I silenced her pretty quickly by telling her that I was not only in the right in this matter but that I was doing a good deed. Also, I told her that I REALLY didn’t care about learning a lesson nightday.
I found the book in the street; therefore, it belonged to me. Rather than take cash for the return of the book, my conditions were that Twilight gift the book to the lesbian as she had planned, only with the wrapping paper and tag I provided. As you can see, my action was not only logical, it was charitable.
What peeved me was that she dared to question me about why I was being so forthcoming with her friend. In her defense, she did raise a good point by correctly remembering my distrust of mares and my overall sour disposition towards ponies in general. However, that didn’t exscuse her unspoken accusations. As much as I would’ve liked to slam her hard for daring to assume I’d do something to harm her friend, I felt as though having the Princess’ student be neutral (If not friendly.) towards me would be most beneficial. Knowing that, I worked up some sort of sob story about how I felt horrible for hurting her and that I was only doing what I thought would cheer her up and help her forgive me.
Booky, do you think I should become a writer or something? Do you think lying is my special talent? What would a lying cutie mark even look like, a politician? Cause that was a very well crafted one that I pulled out of absolutely thin air. Not only do I not care that I hurt her (As I recall, that was the plan when she ripped my previous favorite bowtie thing.) and humiliated her, but I am in no way trying to cheer her up or have her forgive me. I only want the lesbian to act in my defense when the time comes for Ponyville to collectively ask, “Why would you do that to our precious mailmare?”
My exscuse seemed to work relatively well, but Twilight warned me that she was only being protective of her friend. That was where the cookie crumbled. My theory is that she got pissed earlier when she saw me with Octavia despite apparently (In her eyes.) having the hots for the lesbian. However, there is the question of that weird smile she had…
As much as I would like to say that was the end of my frustrations with her for today, there were still issues to be had. Namely the scroll she had intended to send to Princess Celestia. She didn’t seem too affected by the knowledge that I had read the thing and I can only assume that is a consequence of her probably already having figured I had it. I am under the belief that I mentally broke her in some way as the only reaction I managed to draw from her for the rest of my being there came when she bought the doll from me. The way she hugged that thing was weird, it was like she loved it just as much as she would a pony. Weird, who would treat an inanimate object like a pony, right?
Despite her oddness, the rest of my nightday went pretty well. Having the filly riding around in Carty provided me with a few stares that made me skittish. What seemed to work in my favor, however, was that the filly’s presence absolutely shocked Rose (The undercover mole for the conspiracy against my happiness.) when I went to send the final batch of flowers. She saw me coming and got her newly acquired creepy smile going, but I can only assume that didn’t take her very long to notice the foal in my cart. Oddly enough, she never questioned me about her and only took my order quietly, all the while apparently holding back tears or something. Mares are weird, Booky….especially the ones that conspire against me.
After my jam-fest with Twilight, I decided to make an executive decision regarding the filly. You see, I can’t have the filly running around with me, until tomorrow at the earliest, looking like some commoner or something like that. I’ve got an image that I need to maintain after all. Knowing that, I dropped by Rarity’s shop (I almost lost the filly a couple of times due to her blending in with the color of the building.) with the intent of doing business. I was greeted by the same lame sing-song greeting Rarity used last time, she even stopped dead in her tracks when she saw me standing in her doorway like she did the first time I walked into her establishment.
I think I’ve been completely wrong about Rarity. Out of the ponies I deal with, she is the only one who is both struck by my presence and respectful towards me at the same time. I really like that quality. Granted, she asked me where I got the filly from, a question I’ve grown to loathe, but she never ONCE brought it up again after I explained it to her. How cool is that?
Anykung-fu, I acquired the filly a bowtie thingy like the one I have and she looks wonderful in it. At least now I don’t feel bad about showing up in public with her by my side. That doesn’t mean that I will tolerate this situation for long, but it means that she is going to look good until I’m fed up with her.
I’m sad to say that I didn’t really see anypony else that I recognized or wanted to recognize. At several different points I swear I was being followed by a pegasus or something as there was this weird cloud with eyes following me everywhere. Perhaps my gifts have been failing…I mean, the lesbian apparently isn’t the smartest knife in the coconut drawer. What if she thinks I’m only trying to accomplish something rather than trying to make her my friend or something more if she sees it that way? I mean, yeah, I’m not trying to make her my friend or something more and I am indeed attempting to accomplish something, but that’s no excuse for her to be suspicious like that. Plus, it’s rude to just follow somepony around like that.
The pickings daynight were pretty bad in terms of stuff to sell. I mean, I did find a bag filled with fresh muffins, a blanket, and a potato. I’m a little perplexed about the muffins, but I’ll let it slide this time. There isn’t a thing wrong with having something to snack on while working. The blanket wasn’t a very nice one and I don’t think I could even get a bit or two out of it. Don’t get me started on the potato…I hate potatoes…they freak me right the fuck out.
As useless as my findings were daynight, the items I did find found good use at different times each. The muffins fed me and the filly, the blanket allowed the filly to sleep in Carty, and the potato allowed me to test just how far I could toss a potato. Ah, I see you’ve noticed the oddity of that sentence. I had to bring the filly with me during my route daynight and she couldn’t hang on very long. Around two or so she could barely walk so I tossed her into Carty and draped the blanket over her. D’aww, I know, ain’t I the nicest pony in the world?
Tomorrow should prove to be interesting in some form or way. I’m going to have to visit Twilight and get a handle on the situation regarding the filly. Also, I think I’m supposed to get paid by Mayor Mare sometime soon or something. I guess that since I am going out for those errands tomorrow, I could go see Octavia and see if we could do what she considers to be dinner or something. I refuse to be awake at noon ever again…just the thought makes my fur squirm.