With my head now turned away from the ground, the wind caught my mane and whipped it fiercely against my neck. The speed at which I was falling was so great by now that each and every time a strand hit my neck, it stung as if someone had hit me. A sudden gust of wind from the west twisted several stray hairs around my cheek and sent them right into my eye. I cried out in pain: my eye was already wind-stripped and sore, screaming in raw agony.
It was just too much: tears started to stream again from both eyes, formed by both agony and emotion. Gritting my teeth and stifling them, I twisted back around, my mane then free to flow behind me once again.
I had only been falling for moments, but I could see the mountains growing on the horizon. Returning my gaze to the rapidly-approaching forest below, I took note that it no longer looked like a field of sharp, rusty implements, but more like an orange and auburn carpet punctuated with highlights of black and brown interspersed throughout. As big of an improvement as that was, I still knew that it would be no softer of a landing. I was still going to hit somewhere in the forest between the bog and the river, right between the only places where at the very least, I wouldn't end up punctured by the branches of some tree. Of course, I thought wryly to myself.
Sighing again, I let my mind wander. I realized I would look quite a sight, if anypony could see me now. My poorly tended mane and tail had grown quite long over the last few years, afterall. What I would look like to an observer, perhaps a bird flying by? A mental picture formed: I must look like a bluish comet with a black tail, meteoring directly towards the ground. What a crater I would leave! The image in my mind was unexpectedly absurd, and it brought a small chuckle to my wind-chapped lips.
As I idly scanned the forest below, my thoughts turned dark. I began to wonder how many trees I would take with me. Would there be anything left to mark my presence? Any trace of my final resting place? I shook my head again, trying to clear my thoughts, but still found myself wondering what would happen if anypony I knew could see me right now. Would they even be able to tell it was me? And even if they could, why would they care?
My eye twinged again: irritation flaring from where the earlier hairs had struck. A few strands had managed to get stuck in what little moisture remained on the surface. Pain brought clarity, and I was able to banish the dark thoughts from my mind, at least for now.
I reached up gingerly to wipe the offenders from my eye, and in the process, one of my hooves brushed up against my horn. I'd almost forgotten it was there, and realized once I touched it that this was because it had gone completely and utterly numb. Despite it being made of keratin, I had always been able to feel its presence, the magic flowing within making it feel almost like an extra limb. A limb which now felt as if it had been amputated.
I wanted to laugh, to cry, to scream at the sunset sky. On the one hoof, I was happy that at least one part of me wasn't sore, freezing, or in pain for one reason or another. On the other hoof, the only thing that could possibly help me to survive this fall, my horn, was useless.
I closed my eyes and tried to channel magic through my horn, hoping against hope that I had something left in me, some bit of energy that I could try and focus towards doing something, anything to stop or even slow my fall. I took a deep breath, feeling for the root of my magic. Finding it, it felt empty and hollow, a foreign sensation. Nonetheless, I took hold and pushed. Nothing. In frustration I strained so intensely that I nearly screamed... But nothing, not even a single spark or fizzle appeared. In frustration, I whacked it several times with my hoof. This had no effect of course, but thanks to the numbness I didn't even feel a thing.
The despair overwhelmed me, and I gave up almost immediately. I had known from the start that I had nothing left in me. I could feel it. Both literally and figuratively, apparently, because as if on cue my stomach took the opportunity to rumble and groan, so loudly I swore I could hear it over the wind. It was then that I realized that I had no idea how long it had been since I had last eaten, drank, or slept. For all I knew, I could have been flying overnight, or even for days.
For a brief instant I grew concerned and started trying to calculate in my head how long it must have been, when suddenly my eyelid began to twitch as the silliness of the question hit home. Dying of starvation, dehydration, or exhaustion was seriously the least of my worries right now! I snorted; it was ridiculous that the thought had even crossed my mind to begin with.
But I couldn’t put it aside. The thought of me starving, or falling asleep before I hit the ground was so striking, so absolutely hilarious, that I just couldn't escape it. First starting as a smile, I began to chuckle helplessly as I pictured myself sleeping in midair, pillow, blanket and all. Eventually it escalated until I was laughing so hard I was holding my aching sides and gasping for air. This, however, suddenly made me realize just how far I had fallen. I was no longer struggling to take each breath, as the air was much thicker now. I knew this should be cause for concern, but for some reason that just made me laugh all the harder. I doubled over as my entire body was wracked with spasms of laughter.
Abruptly, I straightened up. The humor promptly vanished as my eyes narrowed into a icy glare. I stared up at the sky and with a raw voice, screamed to the heavens. "Come on! Is this all you've got? Bring it on! I don't care anymore! I hate this! I HATE THIS!!!” Taking a deep breath, eyes bugging out once again, I continued to rant and rave. “I have nothing left, nothing at all! You took my parents, my job, my house, my friends and now, now you taunt me by prolonging taking the last thing I have left: my life! Just get it over with! I have nopony who cares for me, so what does it matter anyway! Do you hear me?! Just bring it! End it! Do it now!"
Spent, I went limp, the last of my anger ebbing out of me as all traces of muscle control faded. The wind pushed my limbs outward, splaying them widely, but I no longer forced them back. Deep down, I knew that I didn't want to die, but I just didn't, couldn't seem to care anymore. There was nothing left for me here. I just wanted it to be over.
My tears started flowing freely once more as I closed my eyes and whispered, begging, to nopony in particular.
"Please..."
It was then that consciousness slipped away, the lack of adrenaline allowing exhaustion to finally take me. The irony, of course, being that I was now asleep after all, and as I continued to fall, I dreamed. I found myself on a lonesome cloud in a darkened sky, surrounded by endless numbers of dead, staring eyes. They floated, bodiless, in the air, circling around my little puffball. Glaring at me as if I was a bug to be squished underhoof, they seemed to blame me for some unknown grievances. As I gazed upon them, they turned and left, abandoning me. Retreating from my cloud, they shrank as the distance increased. Even though I feared them, hated them, DESPISED them with every fiber of my being, I found myself helplessly begging and pleading with them to come back. I didn’t want them to leave me alone.
As the last pair of eyes faded from view, I lay there, on a solitary cloud in a boundless sky, curled into a tight little ball. My eyes were wide open but unseeing, pupils shrunk down to tiny dots; I was losing myself in my own mind.
As my vision started to blur, I suddenly saw a point of light off in the distance. My eyes refocused as I stared intently towards the light. Climbing back to my hooves, I hoped against hope that someone had come back for me. As it got closer, the light grew, and filled the blackened sky with colors. It raced towards me, a wall of storms filled with prismatic flame, gaining speed as it approached my tiny cloud.
I shrank back in terror as my legs locked up, eyes widening with recognition: it was the explosion that had taken my parents from me, all those years ago! I hadn't seen it since I was a foal, gazing out the window on that bright, sunny day, looking wistfully at the weather factory, waiting for my parents to come home so we could celebrate the arrival of my cutie mark properly. When it appeared back then, bursting from the factory, I had found it beautiful, an omen of good things to come. Now though, I wasn't so foalish, so naive. I knew what it could do to ponies, and what it had done to my parents.
Shaking with fear, I realized that it had come to take me too! I wanted to flee, screaming at the top my my lungs! Straining, I tried to run, to turn away, but it was as if my hooves were rooted to the very cloud I stood upon. All my struggling accomplished was to make me lose my balance, falling heavily onto my rump. The colored lights became overwhelming as they bore down on me. I started to raise a hoof to shade my eyes, but as I sat there, my terror faded. A sudden calmness, acceptance flowed over me, filled me.
Everything faded away into the light until it was all I could see. A single, final thought rose to the surface of my mind: "Mom, Dad. I'm coming. I'll be home soon." I lowered my hoof and stared off into the glow, waiting for it to take me away.
Thud.
A sudden impact knocked the breath from my lungs, my chest compressing tightly with the force of it. My frigid back felt a sudden blast of heat and friction and my sight blurred further, far worse than what the blistering wind had done before. I started hearing a ringing in my ears, and I swore I heard something else as well, but I couldn't make out what it was. My vision filled with a bright pinkness, swirling and undulating hypnotically wherever I looked.
My first thought was that I had hit the ground and had somehow survived, however impossible that was. What really threw me off though was the lack of any new pain. I still felt as sore and tired as I had before the impact. Figuring that I must just be in shock and that it just hadn’t registered yet, I froze, not wanting to feel the agony of a broken back or leg. Moving as little as possible, I took several shallow, halting breaths. My chest still felt squished flat, so I took the time to try and clear my senses.
Doing so, I started noticing things that seemed out of place. Firstly, I found I could still feel the frigid wind blowing past me, which didn’t make sense. It was autumn, not winter, and there wouldn’t be much wind in the deep woods. My confusion continued to mount as I started to feel a rubbing, undulating sensation along my spine. Had I landed on some creature? I blinked my eyes furiously, my vision returning with each breath, and as it did the pink haze in front of my eyes shifted aside.
Still lost, my mind in total disarray, I looked up crosswise as the pinkness flew up and twisted around my horn, which I was very happy to see was still protruding from my forehead. I stared upwards, stunned, as I realized that the pink wasn’t in my eyes, but was actually something real. Gingerly, I reached up with one hoof to touch it, as whatever it was looked like it had entangled itself around my horn. After some fumbling, it came free, and flew up out of sight. I looked up to follow it, and the twisting of my head brought the background sound that had been hovering on the edges of my hearing into focus.
"Oh my goodness! Oh my goodness! Oh my goodness!"
Sanity returned like a splash of ice cold water as everything came together in my mind. The wind, the tightness, the warmth, the friction; it all made sense only when you put it all together. The tightness in my chest was somepony's forelegs wrapped around me, the warmth was the feeling of their body pressed against mine, the movement and friction I could feel was the pounding of their wings as they tried to slow my fall, and of course the wind was still there because we were still descending at an incredible rate.
Stark realization hit me like an anvil landing on my head as I realized what this meant: Somepony was trying to save me!
How, why, where they came from, none of it mattered to me right now. All I knew was that there was somepony here, somepony who cared enough to try and save me. My briefly deadened emotions roared back to life as a goofy grin appeared on my face. In one quick motion, I twisted myself around and blindly buried my face into the neck of my rescuer, embracing the stranger more tightly than I had hugged anypony since my parents were taken from me.
At first, I felt this strange pony’s neck muscles tighten in shock at my sudden movement, but soon I felt a head come to rest softly against mine, comforting me. I found myself wishing this moment would never end. I didn’t know the pony who I felt such sudden love for, and frankly, I didn’t care. Soon however, the rush of emotion faded, and reality set back in: we were still falling, and I didn’t have time to get all sappy. Slowly opening my eyes, I was startled to find the strange flowing pinkness swirling in front of my nose again. I pulled back in surprise and saw the face of my benefactor for the first time.
From the start I knew it would be a pegasus, but imagine my surprise when I saw that the pony who would be my savior was a young, light yellow filly. She seemed nearly my age, her deep azure eyes which looked upon me with such kindness that I could not help but feel safe and reassured, even in our predicament. The pinkness that had haunted my vision was now revealed to be her flowing mane and tail, fluttering upwards in the wind as we continued to descend. Her delicate looking wings flapped rhythmically, but I began to worry as I noticed that they seemed to falter every once in a while. Looking back to her face with concern, I realized that while there were beads of sweat forming on her brow and she seemed to be straining, giving it her all, our descent was not halting. In fact, it barely seemed to slow.
Leaning in, I placed my mouth close to her ear, calling out loudly over the roar of the wind. "We aren't slowing down!" Hearing me, she stiffened in surprise, and her wings skipped a beat. I pulled back and looked into her eyes, but what I saw did not reassure me.Her pupils contracted at the same time as her eyes widened in shock, looking downwards over my shoulder. She must have come to the same conclusion I had, for she leaned in, positioning her mouth near my ear. Even being so close, I found I could barely heard her faint response over the wind.
I expected panic, but her words came out soft and smooth. "Oh my... I've never really carried anything heavier than a few cute little critters before. I don't know if I have enough in me to stop us!" I was flabbergasted at how calm she sounded, admitting that we were falling helplessly. Though the emphasis in her words implied more concern than her tone, those words themselves made it seem like she had already given up, despite her wings still flapping madly. When I looked back into her eyes and saw the fear in them, I decided then and there that I had to be strong for the both of us: There had to be a way out of this mess!
With my new-found sense of purpose I once again scanned the terrain, but this time my mind was whole and clear. I started doing some calculations in my head, studying the forces and vectors applying to us. My lips parted into a small smile as I realized that all those late nights studying advanced mathematics for my job... my old job... actually did have some practical use after all. Trying to plan the best route, I realized there were many destinations that may be in reach, but her strength was a variable I just didn’t have. I couldn’t make a plan for us: I didn't know enough.
What I did know was that what she was doing wasn’t going to work. I looked back up and yelled into her ear. "Don't try to counter the force directly, it will just wear you out and we already know it isn't working! See if you can take us down at an angle, get us somewhere better to land, like a lake, or even a meadow. Anything is better than these horrible trees!"
She nodded, though I could have sworn I saw a small frown as I finished the last sentence. Looking around, she must have saw something she recognized, because she tilted her wings and turned us towards the setting sun. My empty stomach churned and groaned lightly as I felt our descent start to shift away from vertical. Turning my head, I nodded at her, my smile growing wider. I started to relax again as our trajectory changed in relation to the mountains in the distance: It was working!
I grinned happily, hugging her tightly again. As I did, I found I could not help but relax in her forelegs. All too quickly, my adrenaline faded again and exhaustion fell upon me like a heavy wool blanket. My eyes grew heavy, my sight grew dim, and before I realized it I had already laid my head against her shoulder as consciousness slipped from me once again.
This time, though the location was the same, the dream had a very serene ambiance. I awoke on the cloud in the same endless sky where I had, only moments ago, been petrified by the approach of my deepest fear. But now, when I opened my eyes again to the dreamscape, a single pair of the floating eyes which I had begged to stay had returned. Its sparkling sea blue gaze hovered in the sunset sky, no longer filled with hatred, but with compassion. They looked down upon me with the love and kindness that I had so sorely missed, and I basked in the affection that had long since been denied me. Surrounded by such peace and tranquility, I curled up on the cloud and slept. Perhaps I had a dream within the dream, I do not recall.
An undetermined amount of time later, I was roused slowly from the dream by an insistent nuzzling against my face. Blinking sleepily, my eyes began to regain focus. As they did, I nearly had a heart attack as I realized where I still was. I quickly lifted my head from her shoulder, glad that I had not drooled on her clean, well-groomed coat. She bumped my head again, and I looked up at her. Smiling hesitantly, she tilted her head towards the sunset. I realized I must have been asleep for at least a minute or two, as the sun, which had already been low on the horizon, had sunk further behind the mountains. While some of that could be accounted for by our drop in elevation, I nonetheless quickly took stock of our surroundings.
At first, I couldn't tell what she was motioning at, but then a flash of light caught my attention. There, far in the distance, I saw a shimmering sparkle of reflected sunlight. Squinting at it, I cursed my sore eyes. I even slapped myself in the face with my hoof, but it still took several precious seconds for my vision to focus enough for me to realize that what I seeing was water. Raising my hooves with a cheer, I almost wet myself as I began to slip from her forelegs. Freaking out, I wrapped my hooves back around her, clinging to her instantly, as I turned my attention back to her.
She looked exhausted, probably more than I did. The raging wind had tangled her pink mane, and she was biting her bottom lip in frustration as rivulets of sweat just poured down her face. Her wings no longer kept a steady rhythm, but instead were fluttering intermittently, and at different paces. It was obvious every muscle in her body was strained beyond reason, yet somehow she was still managing to keep going.
I began panicking internally as I leaned in again and called out to her. "Are you okay?" She must have seen the concern in my eyes as she managed to force a smile and nod, and her wings somehow returned to their normal rhythm, at least for now. I was not convinced by this however: it was painfully obvious that she couldn't keep this up much longer. Turning my head again, I replotted our trajectory, cursing the fact that I had fallen sleep. So much wasted time! Much to my horror, I found that we were still descending too quickly. Despairingly, I double-checked, and confirmed that we were not going to make the water; in fact, we only had a minute, maybe two before we would be in the trees. And that was only if her wings didn't give out!
I looked around as I triple-checked the numbers, looking for something, anything I could use to change the equation, make this survivable. It was useless. Other than the water in the distance, all I could see for miles around were those enormous accursed trees. At this height, the autumn leaves did not even hide their deadly ugliness; I could see their solid, blackened trunks, and their sharp, spindly branches, stretched towards the sky.
The sky that we were falling from.
I knew that once we hit those trees, it would be over for both of us. We were out of time.
My eyes steeled as I made my decision.
I looked back into her eyes, the deep blue pools which had brought me some small happiness after the worst times in my life. She looked back and, somehow surmising my intent, tightened her grip around me. She started shaking her head: No. I looked her dead in the eyes and yelled out the flat, ugly truth. "I'm not going to make it, and if you stay with me, you won't make it either! I will not let my last act in this world be to take the life of another pony!” Taking a deep breath, I spoke the words she didn’t want to hear. “I need you to let me go, and I need you to do it now! There’s no time to argue!"
Her gaze abruptly darkened as she stopped shaking her head, locking her gaze with mine. The warm blue in her eyes turned to ice as she frowned, her eyebrows knitting together. Sudden anger made her pupils grow wide and seemed to vibrate as she gave me what could only be described as a death glare. I shrank back from her then, but even so, I had no trouble hearing her this time.
Unblinking, staring me dead in the eyes, she yelled at me. "NO!!!" I cringed, but could not look away. "We will find another way! I will not let you die!"
Trying to muster my failing will, I began to protest. "But I..."
The glare somehow managed to intensify, her pupils shrinking. "Don't you 'But I' me, mister! We are in this together and that is final!"
As her deadly stare drilled into my soul, I felt my resolve start to crumble. So I did the only thing I could do. I leaned in and gave her a hug. This must have thrown her off, because I felt her relax as my hooves wrapped gently around her neck. This made it all the harder as I pressed my lips close and whispered into her ear.
"Thank you, but goodbye."
Mustering the last of my remaining physical strength, I planted my forehooves on her shoulders, and my hindhooves against her hips, and with all my might, I pushed off of her in one sudden burst of movement. For a second, her grip almost held, but then I broke free, tumbling away from her. Falling, my back to the trees below, all I could see then was her horrified face, surrounded by the darkening sky, and in it, the first stars of the night.
For a moment, I wished that I hadn't looked back, as the look of betrayal in her eyes ripped me to my core. I felt tears rising again, but I shook them away; I had to be strong for her. She had to be okay. She might hate me, she might not forgive herself, or me, but she would live. I looked back again, wanting her to see me smiling, to know that it was okay, but that smile faded instantly as I saw her one last time.
Her wings had stopped beating!
I could see her hooves flailing wildly as her wings snapped shut. Her eyes scrunched shut in concentration as she strained her back, arching it as she tried to force them open again. But it was no use. I was too late. Like me, she had nothing left. She opened her eyes again and looked at me. That gaze haunted me. Those eyes, once filled with kindness, now held nothing but fear and hopelessness. Our eyes locked, and now all I could think of was how I had abandoned her for nothing; that because of me, she was as doomed as I was.
"No."
Time slowed to a standstill. My heart stopped mid-beat. Our manes, blowing wildly in the wind, froze as if turned to stone. Her eyes bored into my very being. Here was a pony who had just risked her life, who had pushed herself past her limits, and given everything she had to save me. Me! A nopony! She didn't know who I was. She didn't even know my name, yet she was willing to give everything up to save me. She had held me as I slept, she had comforted me, she had chased away my nightmares. She had been there in my time of need. All this for a worthless pony like me!
I could not let this happen.
My eyes twitched and opened wide, as they lit up with a bright, white glow. My forehead felt like it was ablaze. My body spasmed uncontrollably, and I could feel my limbs forced to bend at strange angles. All I could feel was agony, but it was worth it because, suddenly, I could feel something. Deep down inside, entrenched within me so deeply, so small and tiny that it was almost infinitesimal, I found one last bastion of strength. I grabbed at it, wrenched it free. It felt as if I was dragging it from my very life essence. Maybe I was at that point, but it didn't matter because it was there, and I needed it now.
A spark of magic.
I would NOT let this happen!
I exploded with power, releasing a primal scream. "NO!!!"
Time started again, but it seemed to crawl. The purplish haze returned with a vengeance, tinting the world. Magic erupted from me in all directions, pink lightning bolts striking the trees below that were now very close. Ironically, I was glad they were nearby, as they made perfect lightning rods, keeping the filly safe from me. I was now a hazard to everypony once again, including myself this time.
I had never felt pain like this before; it was like every nerve in my body was shredding itself, but I had somehow partitioned my mind, separated it so that I never lost clarity. As my head slowly turned, I gazed at the bolts of magic which had begun to flow from me. They arced through the air in slow motion, and my eyes travelled along their length, marveling in their elegance. I watched in awe as the trees that were struck around me changed. Some melted, cascading slowly into rainbow pools, while others morphed into solid ice, some of which exploded from the sudden transformation. As they combined in midair, colors shone and sparkled as the last beams of the sun caught them tumbling below me, creating the most amazing panorama of color and light. A tear began to form in one eye; it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
Then I saw it, between the trees. That tantalizing sparkle. Water. Instantly I focused and fired a concentrated, spiralling beam of magic directly at it. From this distance, I couldn't see it hit, but I could FEEL it. I reveled in being able to feel my magic once again. I was filled with it! I churned and frothed the water, spinning it faster and faster, pulling it upwards and outwards. Soon I had created a waterspout. As the water rocketed out of the top, I directed the spray towards us.
Feeling a strange vibration in my horn as the water flew through the air, I took a moment to look up at my forehead. As my eyes crossed, I could see beams of light erupting from within the horn’s surface. It seemed to be slowly pulsating, emphasizing the slowness of time. With each throb I swore I could see tiny cracks appearing and growing, spreading with every pulse. In any normal situation this would scare me to my wits end, but at this point, it was of no consequence. She was more important. Nothing else mattered. I turned my attention back to the torrent of water flying towards me.
Darkness started to creep into the corners of my vision: I knew I had little time remaining. I released the remaining water at the lake from the spell I had cast, and made sure that the water already in the air was directed towards and below her. Shadows crowded my sight; I could no longer make anything out. I knew I had to do it now, but I could no longer see where the water was! I began to panic; had I miscalculated? When I finally felt that first droplet of water land on my flank and start to run down my leg, I knew that she was going to be alright. Tensing up one last time, I released all my remaining magic in one final, wide area burst below where that one-of-a-kind filly was falling.
My body went numb. I could no longer see anything at all, but as the darkness took me, I felt my magic strike its target. As the wave of magic collided with the water droplets, they evaporated, and the remaining magic fused it all together into a thick fog bank. I could feel the mass of clouds swirling all the way to the ground, and I knew that it would be big enough and soft enough to save her.
The last thing I heard as the magic faded from me and time resumed its normal speed was a satisfying whoomph as filly met cloud.
Well, I guess that technically isn’t true. The last thing I really heard was the sound of my body breaking through the uppermost branches and hitting the trees.
Crickety-crackle-crack Thump Whumph crinkle-crash SPLUT