Three months after ‘How to Date a Princess’…
I’m ok. I’m ok. Everything is FINE.
It’s just a casual dinner with the parents and siblings of the world’s most amazing mare.
It’s ok that she hasn't told her family that I'm her coltfriend yet even through its been three months since we’ve started dating and that her siblings are the PRINCE and PRINCESS of the CRYSTAL EMPIRE and that her brother was my guard captain for years and that I’m now dating his SISTER and that his wife will KNOW if I ever hurt his LSBFF because of her LOVE MAGIC and—
GAHSOMETHINGSOFT!!!!
Oh. It’s Twilight.
It’s just Twilight.
“Flash, relax,” Twilight said, gently resting her hoof on his.
“Why? I’m fine. TOOOOOOOTALLY fine. I’m just going to go meet your parents and tell them I’m dating their daughter and see my old guard captain to let him know I’m now dating his sister which is something I completely forgot about when I first asked you out despite the fact that he was always so protective of you and gave me a maybe-sorta-I’m-not-sure-if-it-was-really-meant-this-way playful warning not to let anything happen to you and Cadence will be there with her fancy love magic to know if I ever hurt you and I think I’m stuck just saying my thoughts out loud again and I don’t even have my armor in case something unforeseeable happens which means I won’t be able to protect you as effectively which could make Shining doubt making me your guard captain and this sentence just wont stop which is ok it’s ok I think I’m fine finefinefinefinemmph…”
Twilight leaned in and captured his lips in a soft kiss.
Mmmmmm…Ok, I feel better now.
Slightly.
“Flash, you WILL be fine. I promise, my family is going to love you,” Twilight said once she broke the kiss, nuzzling him affectionately. “My brother put you in charge of my guard in the first place, so he won’t be nearly as overprotective as you think. And remember, you were able to face down a rage-shifting Bull Horn, something that I’m sure my family has all heard about by now. Plus, this won’t be nearly so bad OR potentially dangerous.”
“You’re going to jinx us, I hope you know that,” Flash said, prompting a giggle and an eye roll from his marefriend. “How do we know Shining won’t insist on a spar as an excuse to show me what will happen if I break your heart? Or what if CADENCE insists on that? I heard from the other guards that she LOVES extreme roller-skating derbies, and that she sometimes participates! What if she challenges me to a match!?”
“Flash, relax,” Twilight said, a bit more sternly. “My brother would never do something like that! And Cadence wouldn’t be that mean to you even if she weren’t pregnant. Especially seeing as you can’t roller-skate anyway,” she added, giggling.
“And you can’t ice skate,” Flash said with a playful ‘humph’, sticking his tongue out teasingly as Twilight just let out her own adorable ‘humph’ of fake annoyance as she turned away. Though a quick nuzzle made her turn that frown upside-down.
Turn that frown upside-down…I think I’ve been hanging out with Pinkie too much this last week.
“Now arriving, Canterlot Station!” the conductor announced, drawing Flash’s attention back to his surroundings. The two of them were currently in the Friendship Express’s passenger car, along with two guards from the Twilight Guard.
Thankfully, most of the other passengers were ponies who lived in Ponyville, meaning that almost everypony surrounding them was already used to Flash being next to Twilight ninety percent of the time anyway. As such, they had gone through the trip without any wide-eyed stares or ponies coming over for Twilight’s autograph, which was nice, but Flash somehow did not find the surprising privacy at all soothing.
The train came to a gentle stop just outside Canterlot Station, allowing the beautiful craftsmanship of the city to come into clear view. From the window, Flash could see one Lunar Guard and one Solar Guard standing at attention.
Right, they were in the city, so they were here waiting to reinforce their Twilight Guard counterparts. This was the standard procedure for whenever Twilight came to Canterlot. There was a higher density of ponies, so more guards were needed to ensure nothing would happen. So why was Flash’s pulse starting to spike again?
Was it because he was already stressed, and seeing more protection show up was making him think that something bad WOULD happen? After all, you don’t get reinforcements unless things were about to go wrong, right? Why send more hooves to help if everything was perfectly ok?
Flash good a deep, slow breath to try and calm down. His stress about to night was just making things seem worse than they actually were. This was a normal procedure, and everything would be FINE. Thought, now that he actually thought about it, having the guards waiting for you at the train platform was actually a pretty big give away as to which train Twilight was on, assuming any potential evil doers were looking for her. And the small size of the station the Ponyville train always arrived at likely made them pretty conspicuous.
“I think we need a better system,” Flash muttered to himself as the other passengers began to retrieve their luggage, if they had any.
“Huh?” Twilight asked, looking at him in confusion.
“Sorry, just thinking about the Solar and Lunar Guards outside. Having them stand there before we even get off is kind of a giveaway as to what train you’re on, especially since there’s only the one train platform. I feel that there should be a better system for helping keep you safe.”
“What, like them standing on the roof to stay out of sight?” Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow.
Flash opened his mouth to respond, but paused. “You know, maybe…” he said, humming in thought. “It would make them harder to spot, and it would give them a good vantage to see incoming threats in a large crowd. I may need to bring this up at the next meeting with the Captain of the Royal Guard.”
“You can do that later. I’m sure it’s fine for tonight,” Twilight said, smiling. Flash tried to smile back, only for his mind to immediately jump to all the things that COULD go wrong tonight. Most of them were clearly ridiculous, but, they still made his heart start pounding like there was no tomorrow.
Oh Luna, please let there be no trouble tonight. No changelings, no ancient evils, no Discord shenanigans. PLEASE let the only thing I need to deal with be Twilight’s family. That is MORE than enough stress for one night. I know it’s Tuesday, but PLEASE just give me this one day.
Twilight gave Flash a gently tug on the leg, snapping him out of his internal monologue. Taking a deep breath, Flash hopped down from the seat and raised a wing. Twilight gladly accepted the invitation and immediately snuggled into what had become her favorite spot by his side as the two left the train together, their guards not far behind.
The Solar and Luna guards outside saluted and fell into step with the rest of their party as Flash and Twilight continued on. After about a minute or two, they emerged into the moderately crowded street of Canterlot proper and set off for their destination. All around them, the golden orange light of the sunset illuminated the path and worked to enhance the already stunning architecture of Canterlot.
Flash never got tired of seeing the city at this time of day, and it did wonders for his nerves.
Now that they were out of Ponyville, ponies passing by on the street stopped to look at them before turning away to whisper excitedly with one another. Flash had no idea if it was because Princess Twilight was visiting Canterlot or because Flash was holding her under his wing in a blatant form of affection. Or both. Either way, everypony was smiling, so Flash couldn’t help but smile too.
Though regardless of why everyone around them was so excited, Flash couldn’t help but think back to Discord. True to his word, the draqueous had given Celestia and Luna images of Flash protecting Twilight from Bull Horn and had even given his own interview as part of the Crown’s official statement. The information and photo evidence had immediately discredited Bull Horn’s family name and had given Flash a huge popularity and name recognition boost. There had even been a few calls for him to be awarded a medal in various papers across Equestria, though Flash really didn’t think he deserved one.
After all, he was only doing his job.
THANKFULLY, Discord and the Crown had NOT revealed that Twilight and Flash were actually DATING. Which was good, as the last thing Flash wanted was to be swarmed by journalists and tabloid writers looking for every little detail of their still-young relationship only a few days after their first date. Actually, Ponyville had helped them keep it quiet so far due to the small size of the town, the respect the ponies had for Twilight’s privacy, and the fact that not much gossip or news spread out from the town in general due to it being out of the way.
Granted, Flash knew they wouldn’t be able to hide it forever, especially given that he and Twilight had already been voted as the ‘Most Likely to End Up Together by the End of the Year’ by one of Rarity’s silly magazines (which was thankfully only circulated in Vanhoover and not Canterlot), but that didn’t mean they couldn’t enjoy the quiet while it lasted. And it certainly wouldn’t stop Flash from showering Twilight with affection.
Even if that affection was something as simple as hugging her with his wing like he was doing right now.
Besides, according to Fancy Pants, many of the nobles bristled at even the mention of Twilight dating someone like him yet were afraid to act after what had happened to Bull Horn. So if holding Twilight under his wing just made the obnoxious ones grind their teeth together, all the better.
Besides, they’re probably just jealous. Twilight’s fur is so soooooooooft…It’s like she’s part teddy bear or plushy or something! I bet the nobles are just jealous they can’t hug her.
“Well, here we are,” Twilight said, prompting Flash to blink and look up. In front of them was a cozy two-story house with a small yard and white picket fence. The house was a light blue with a purple door that had an emblem of a gleaming star embezzled on the front, a symbol that identified the house as a part of the royal family.
It still looked new, despite the fact that it had likely been there since Shining’s wedding.
Oh, hello there, panic, my old not-friend. Welcome back. I didn’t miss you.
At all.
Flash couldn’t help but gulp as he lifted his wing off of Twilight. This was it. The building that would either spell his doom or his eternal happiness.
(Sure, he TECHNICALLY could stay with Twilight even if her family disapproved, but there was no way in hell he was going to make her choose between him and her loved ones.)
As such, this fortress of fear would be the greatest challenge he had ever faced. EVER.
I really wish my brain would stop being so dramatic. It’s really not helpin—YIPE!
Flash just managed to keep from yelling as Twilight literally shoved him forward. He caught his balance and turned to give his marefriend a deadpan frown, only to see the deep impressions in the ground, right at the threshold of the gate.
He must have frozen dead at some point in his panicking.
Whoops.
Well, that would explain why the guards were smothering their chuckles behind him.
“We'll be ok from here and will be staying over, so please feel free to take the night off!” Twilight called back at them, giving Flash a small zap with her horn, finally jumpstarting his legs just as they reached front steps.
“Yes, Princess,” one of the guards said, though Flash couldn’t tell which one because his eyes were still locked on the Doorway to Doom. “We will keep a guard posted nearby just in case you need anything. We’ll meet you back here in the morning. Have a nice night.”
Is that even possible? Twilight might have a nice night, but me?
No, pull it together, Flash. You can do this. You can do this.
For Twilight.
And with that final thought, they reached the top of the three steps and Twilight gave a few sharp knocks with her hoof.
For Twilight.
For ten agonizing seconds, there was nothing. Then, the door quickly opened, and Twilight was practically swept off her hooves as Twilight Velvet pulled her into a hug.
“Twilight!” Velvet exclaimed happily, squeezing the purple mare so tightly that Flash was certain he heard her squeak. “Ohhhh, I’ve missed you. I know you’re a princess and all, but you REALLY should write us more!”
“Mom, I write you and dad at least once a week!” Twilight said, struggling to free her front hooves from her mom's death grip. “Usually more!”
"Oh, I know, but your letters have been so short recently! The last time they were so compact was when you were distracted by your final exams at Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns! And they’ve been that way for almost three months now!”
Well, I doubt that’s a coincidence, Flash thought to himself as he slowly crossed into the threshold himself. I guess I’m as distracting to Twilight as a final exam…Should I be taking that as a compliment?
He took a moment to look around. The walls were painted a subtle shade of green with various pictures of Shining Armor and Twilight hanging along the hallway. There was a big one above the end table of a tiny Twilight proudly showing off her cutie mark, and Flash smiled at how adorable it was. Off to the left was the family room with two big blue couches, a coffee table covered in snacks, and two red fancy chairs. To the right was a small office area with books and star charts stacked everywhere and hung on every single wall.
Further down the hall was a staircase leading up to the second floor and more of the hallway, which was where the rest of the family was currently galloping down to join Velvet.
Night Light, Shining Armor, a slightly pregnant Princess Cadence. Yep, the whole family’s here. Yay…
No, bad heart. Stay calm. Just, stay calm. We can panic when they are actually paying attention to you and not Twilight.
“Be sure to let her breathe, mom,” Shining said, chuckling as he reached the three of them. Velvet glared at him, but did relent her grip on Twilight slightly. Which was good, as she looked as though she was starting to turn a little blue.
“You could have waited for the rest of us, honey,” Night Light joked, pausing to nuzzle his wife before joining her in hugging his daughter. “But she is right, Twilight. You letters have been pretty short for quite a while now. I miss the detailed stories you would send us about your latest adventures.”
“Sorry,” Twilight mumbled, finally getting her hooves free so she could return the hug. “I’ve been…distracted.” She cast a small glance at Flash, who couldn’t help but smile back briefly.
“By new books Luna has been sending you?” Cadence asked with a knowing tone, only to blink in surprise as Twilight shook her head.
“No, actually. Not books.”
“Well, that has to be a first,” Shining joked, earning a pointed angry-little-sister-glare from Twilight. Though everypony, Flash included, couldn’t help but chuckle at Twilight’s reaction.
“Oh, hello there,” Velvet said, apparently just noticing Flash. “You must be Flash Sentry, Twilight’s guard captain, correct? She’s been mentioning you in her letters for almost a year now. And weren’t you in the paper recently? I seem to remember seeing you on the front page a few months ago.”
Well, hopefully that gives me a small advantage in winning them over, Flash thought as he gulped and gave a shaky nod. All eyes were on him now, and he had to stop his left hind leg from twitching nervously. Great, they’ve all noticed me now. Is this how Fluttershy feels every day? I think I understand her much better now if it is.
“Flash, good to see you again soldier,” Shining said, giving him a firm nod and a smile. “You don’t need to guard Twilight tonight. She’ll be fine here.”
Oh boy. How do I—
“Actually Shining…he’s not here to guard me,” Twilight said, finally breaking the hug with her parents and walking back over to Flash and closing the still-open door behind him. “I…invited him for dinner with us.”
“He’s not?” Shining asked, confusion clearly displayed on his face as well as the others present.
Here it comes…
Twilight, please hold me. I’m scared.
“Mom, Dad, Shining, Cadence, Flash isn’t just my guard captain anymore. As of the Grand Galloping Gala, he is now my coltfriend.”
…
…
…
…
…
Am I dead yet?
No, he wasn’t, but that didn’t make Flash feel any better.
No pony was talking. No pony was BLINKING. It was as if time itself had frozen and reality itself had ceased to function as Twilight’s family stood there, eyes wide in shock. The tension was so thick, and Flash was certain that any sudden movements would shatter the universe as he kne—
“YOU HAVE A COLTFRIEND!?!?!?!?!?!?”
GAH!!!
Flash and Twilight both leapt backwards in shock as Cadence and Velvet instantly appeared only inches away from Twilight’s face. Flash had just enough time to notice both of them balancing on their fore-hooves before both mares squealed excitedly and very loudly.
Can EVERYPONY in this family teleport!? was the only thought Flash could think before he found himself, Shining, and Night Light all floating in mid-air. What the—
“You boys get to know one another as we GET ALL THE DETAILS!” Cadence yelled, practically crushing Twilight in a hug as she took to the air. “Enjoy the food, we’ll be back once we get the ENTIRE STORY!”
“EEEEEEEEEE! FINALLY! Do you know how long I have WAITED FOR YOU TO SAY THOSE WORDS!?!?” Velvet squealed, joining Cadence in hugging the now struggling Twilight Sparkle. Flash didn’t have time to think of a way to help her as suddenly he and the rest of the males present were unceremoniously dumped in the family room as Twilight was dragged upstairs by two very excited females.
“Hey, wait a—Twilight!” Flash called, getting back to his hooves and racing for the stairs, only to be stopped by a hoof on his shoulder.
“Flash, it’s ok,” Shining said, trying to reassure him and only slightly succeeding.
“B-But they just FOALNAPPED TWILIGHT!”
“She’ll be fine,” Shining assured him, smirking. “Besides, I don’t think you could get her back until they were done anyway. Not even a dragon would risk getting in the way of them and Twilight right now.”
“I—they—Twilight—” Flash stuttered, looking back and fourth between Twilight’s father and brother and the stairs that his marefriend had been dragged up against her will. He couldn’t decide which fate was worse: fighting off two crazy mares to save Twilight, or sitting in a room with his old, highly protective captain and Twilight’s father and explaining to them why he was dating their sister/daughter and why he was a good stallion for her, all without Twilight there to support his claims and make sure he didn’t make a fool of himself in front of half her family.
BOTH were terrifying prospects.
Then again, it had been at least a full minute since she left and he was still alive, so maybe that was a good sign. Or maybe they were just waiting for him to mess up before they attacked!
Oh Luna, why is this so much more nerve wracking than anything Ponyville has thrown at me?! IT SHOULDN’T BE THIS SCARY BUT IT IS!
“Breathe, son. Breathe,” Night Light said, pulling Flash out of his internal panic attack and back to the real world. Though it seemed that he managed to bring the panic with him given how he COULDN’T breathe until Night Light gave him a solid smack on the back. Flash gasped, oxygen finally starting to find his brain again.
Great, I can’t even BREATHE right now. WHY IS THIS SO STRESSFUL!? Just say something, ANYTHING! Just make sure it’s a real word and you’ll be maybe ok.
“S-Sorry sir,” Flash said, realizing distantly that he was probably shouting. Yet Night Light was actually chuckling.
“Flash, relax. And just call me Night Light,” he said with a chuckle as he moved to sit down on one of the chairs. “I won’t bite, and I can already say you’re doing better than the first time I met Velvet’s parents.”
I am? I’m panicking and stuttering yet I’m doing better than he did? I find that hard to believe.
“Really?” Flash asked nervously.
“Yep. First time I met her father, I was so nervous that I fainted straight away,” Night Light chuckled. “And according to Celestia, Shining was only moderately better when Cadence introduced him to her, and only because he didn’t faint until AFTER she had left the room.”
Shining Armor, the Prince of the Crystal Empire, previous leader of the Solar Guard and now leader of the Crystal Guard, blushed as red as Pinkie’s face after she had eaten five cupcakes covered in hot sauce and inhaled about two balloon’s worth of helium. “DAD!!!”
Somewhere, deep inside his brain, something went ‘BOOOOOING BOING BOING’ and Flash simply sat down heavily on the floor. For as long as he has know Shining Armor, almost nothing had ever seemed to faze him. He always seemed to be confident and in control, ready to take on any challenge Canterlot or the Crystal Empire threw his way. The only exception that came to mind immediately was when the changelings had messed with his mind. The idea of SHINING ARMOR fainting the first time he met the princess countered almost everything else Flash knew about him.
Then again, we mostly interacted when we were both on duty, and I never really saw how well Shining controlled his emotions during his time off. And…oh yea, this would have been years ago, long before he became the captain of the guard. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe he WOULD be panicked enough to faint because he hadn’t perfected his epic staying-cool-under-pressure skills yet. Yes?
Ugh, my brain hurts…Given my experience with Pinkie breaking reality, this REALLY shouldn’t be so difficult to wrap my head around.
“Besides,” Night Light said, using his magic to rummage through a basket he had pulled out from behind the couch, “everything Twilight and Shining have said about you has been positive. Not to mention Shining was willing to trust you with our daughter’s safety and thought you were competent enough to lead her guard force. Between that and this newspaper article, I’d say you’ve already managed to make a good impression.”
He finally pulled out a newspaper and levitated it to Flash.
“PFFFFFFFFFF,” Flash sputtered, trying (and failing) not to laugh at the front cover. The image showed him, Twilight, and Bull Horn together in the castle gardens the night of the Grand Galloping Gala. In it, Flash was photographed mid-punch, his hoof connecting solidly with the side of the still-on-fire Bull Horn’s face. The noble was cross-eyed as he was clearly being knocked off his hooves.
I don’t even care how Discord got this photo. If he can get me images like this, we should ask if he would be willing to capture all the silly faces those obnoxious nobles make on film and share them with us.
And maybe all the silly and adorable ones Twilight’s makes too. Hehehe.
“Not to mention you haven’t started bragging yet,” Night Light added, drawing Flash’s eyes away from the picture and causing him to blink in confusion.
“Bragging?”
“Lots of the worst nobles wanted to get close to Twilight after she was inducted into Celestia’s school,” Shining said with a grimace. “Plenty of them came here bragging about how great their children were and how she should be introduced to them. There were even a few that wanted arranged marriages, with either her or me.” Shining said, glaring at nothing in particular.
“Oh…wait,” Flash said, raising an eyebrow. “Arranged marriages are illegal now unless the child is sixteen and consents in pony with Celestia or Luna to allow their guardians to arrange the union.”
“That didn’t stop them,” Night Light said, shaking his head. “Thankfully, Celestia stepped in rather quickly and made it painfully obvious that she would not tolerate that kind of nonsense after a noble mare tried to blackmail us by threatening to get Shining kicked out of the guard academy. Though that lady didn’t even come close to carrying out said threat given that a few of Celestia’s guards stationed near our house overheard her making the threat. She was stripped of her title, and that we were never blackmailed again.”
“Some nobles never change,” Flash said, facehoofing.
Part of me wants to be surprised, but I’m not.
“But what does that have to do with me again?”
“You’re nervous,” Night Light said with a warm smile. “It gives me the sense that you care about Twilight’s family liking you, and that you’re afraid of messing things up. You’re not overconfident, or boasting about your achievements or money or what have you. And you’re also not bragging about saving my daughter from Bull Horn.”
“I was just doing my job,” Flash said simply, blushing slightly. “Though I will admit I would have done it even if Twilight weren’t a princess or under my protection.”
“She is quite special, isn’t she?” Shining said, smiling as he grabbed a slice of cheese off the coffee table and sitting on the couch. He patted the cushion next to him, inviting Flash to take a seat somewhere that wasn’t the floor. “Though how exactly did you two decide to go to the Gala together? I don’t think the paper mentioned anything about that.”
“I wouldn’t expect it to,” Flash said, taking a seat and grabbing a baked-spinach-and-tomato cup. “Thought, ironically, it was all because of Bull Horn that I went with her at all.”
“Really?” Night Light said curiously as Shining nearly choked on his cheese. “Now this sounds like a good story.”
And thus Flash spent the next hour or so recounting his experience from three months prior. Shining and Night Light were particularly angry when they first heard of Bull Horn’s insane demand that Twilight should take Money Bags to the Gala as her date, but both also became immediately proud when they found out how Twilight had booted him out of the castle (and into the fountain, which Flash personally liked to believe was strategically placed outside just so obnoxious nobles would land in it).
Once that story was done, Shining had asked why Flash had resorted to punching Bull Horn in the face, so Flash gave them a rundown of the events of the Gala leading up to the image Discord had taken. He made sure to include his first run in with Bull Horn and him humiliating Money Bag’s right in the middle of the Gala as well, just for context.
When he had explained that Bull Horn thought he would become the next prince of Equestria, both Shining and Night Light gave equal looks of exasperation at the idea. When he finally gotten to what was happening in the paper’s picture, Night Light had given him a solid hug for protecting his daughter and Shining had given him a friendly congratulatory smack on the back that actually sent him off the couch.
All the while, the three of them snacked on the appetizers while making sure to save plenty for Twilight and Cadence, both of whom had bottomless pits for stomachs. They would need to stop the story at times so Night Light could head to the kitchen and make sure the food was still cooking without issue, but for the most part there were no interruptions.
And, surprisingly enough, Flash genuinely enjoyed himself. Both Night Light and Shining were patient, friendly, and not nearly as overly protective of Twilight as he thought they’d be. It wasn’t nearly the interrogation he expected it to be, and by the time he was halfway through his story, any tension of his had practically evaporated.
And thus, Twilight is right once again. But seeing how Shining was always so protective of Twilight whenever he mentioned her, I still think my initial expectation of his reactions was perfectly reasonable, no matter how wonderfully wrong I was.
Night Light…Yeah, not so much. Twilight talked about how understanding and friendly he was, but I guess my fear of Shining’s reaction may have colored my view of how he would react too. But it’s still nice to see that everything is working out just fine.
Though maybe I should have been more worried about Twilight. Seriously, what is taking them so long up there? If they don’t come down soon, I might need to stage a rescue after all. Hopefully Shining can back me up though. I do not envy trying to get between Twilight and her overly excited mom and sister-in-law…