The sun had been lowered and the moon raised, and Luna was busy brushing her mane in front of a mirror when a series of heavy knocks thunked through the door to her chambers.
Her ears perked up in excitement. It was probably her sister, here to talk about how the negotiations had gone the night before. Luna couldn’t wait to report her successes in dealing with the changeling queen. Of course, Celestia had done most of the work in this case, but she had entrusted Luna to tie off the treaty with the changelings in her absence, incorporating them into Equestrian society. She had even managed to get rid of a pest in the process. She could almost see her sister’s proud smile through the door. She gave her flowing mane a few last strokes with the brush before standing and answering the door.
Like she had thought, Celestia stood on the other side, however, there was no smile on her sister’s face. In fact, Luna would say she looked quite pissed.
“Good evening sister,” Luna greeted warmly. The serious look on Celestia’s face was starting to make the younger sibling nervous.
“Good evening Luna. I think we need to have a little chat. Please, follow me.”
The rest of the day had passed as uneventfully as any other. After cleaning up the mess Chrysalis had left behind, Liam wandered the halls for a while. He eventually stumbled upon some of the maids and asked if there was anything they needed help with. They found some work for him to do and they chatted as the hours whittled away.
Most of his afternoon was spent in the library. He'd finally finished the book he had chucked at chitinous royalty and had returned to scout out something else to pass the time with. The librarian was obviously upset at the book’s condition, but when he explained what had happened she was very understanding, and even seemed amused by Liam's tale.
It wasn’t long before the human found himself scanning the many shelves of the labyrinthine library in search of new reading material. He had just wandered into the fiction section when he heard the distinct sound of metal on stone coming from nearby. The sound echoed off the tall shelves. It was probably a guard sent to find him. Liam wondered what poor fool they’d sent this time.
He had apparently garnered a strange reputation in the guard over the months. Sometimes someone (usually Celestia) would need Liam for something and send a guard to come retrieve him. Since he spent so much time in the library, it was usually the first place they looked. It wouldn't be hard to find a six foot tall ape, even within the tall shelves of the royal library. Or so they thought. Most ponies had no idea how to navigate the maze of books, so they got lost in their search until Liam happened upon them. When he did, he apparently had a tendency to startle them as he came around one of the shelves unexpectedly.
This occurrence had spawned a bit of a cult following within the guard. They’d come up with an entire lore based around him having strange powers that he could only use within the confines of what they had simply dubbed "The Shelves". Within the lore, Liam was referred to as the Wanderer. There were even branching theories in the lore, depending on which guard was asked. Some would say that the Wanderer acted as a protector of the library's knowledge on the orders of Princess Celestia herself. Others would say that the Wanderer was the restless spirit of someone who had died horribly in the library, and whose body had never been found. As part of a hazing ritual, the older guard members would tell new cadets about the Wanderer and his strange powers before sending them in to find Liam. This usually resulted in the human scaring the crap out of some poor kid by accident.
Liam didn’t know all the details of the lore, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to. It wasn’t uncommon for him to find guards in various states of panic and have to lead them out of his papery domain. He once found a guard freaking out in the history section, and when he saw Liam turn the corner he ran in the opposite direction screaming that he didn’t want to be turned into a book. Good times.
Liam hadn’t found out about his new SCP status until weeks after he had started finding terrified recruits on a regular basis. From there, it just spiraled out of control. Once, when he had hanging out in the barracks with some friends, a guard mentioned that he was planning to write a book based on this new urban legend when he retired. In all honesty, Liam didn’t mind if they wanted to set him up as a boogeyman for new recruits, so long as nobody was hurt by it.
After honing in on the sound for a good five minutes, he rounded a corner and found himself standing next to a pony wearing golden armor. They hadn’t noticed him yet, but it wouldn’t stay that way for long.
“Hello,” Liam said simply. The guard jumped slightly and turned to look at him. They came face to face with his stomach before craning their neck to look up at his face.
“Um, H-hi,” she said nervously.
“Let me guess, you were sent to find me?”
“Actually, I was just told to wander around in here. They said you would find me, sir.”
Liam chuckled at that. “It would seem that they were right. What do you need?” he asked in a friendly manner. She was already nervous, no need to scare her more.
“My superior wanted me to deliver a message. Princess Celestia wanted to see you in her study at your earliest convenience, sir.”
Celestia’s study? Normally he was just called straight to her chambers. It was an odd meeting place, but who was he to refuse horse royalty?
“Alright, I guess I’ll head over there now. Do you need me to lead you out of here?”
She blushed in embarrassment. “Um, if you wouldn’t mind, sir. I’ve been lost in here for twenty minutes.” Liam chuckled again at that before starting his way back to the library entrance, guard in tow.
“No worries. You’re not the first pony I’ve had to help out of here, and you probably won’t be the last.”
It didn’t take long for him to navigate his way out of the library. After that, the guard took point and lead them to their final destination.
The door to Celestia’s study was simple and looked like just about every other door in the castle. Those that weren’t for show, anyway. The only real difference was the pair of guards standing outside. Liam's escort walked up to her fellow guards and began to speak to one of them. He couldn’t hear what they were saying, so he waited patiently for them to finish. After a few moments his escort turned to him.
“The princess isn’t here yet. She gave us orders to let you wait inside if we got here before her. I have to get back and report to my commanding officer. Have a good evening, sir.”
Liam thanked her before she wandered off to get back to work. One of the door guards opened the door and he stepped inside. The study was expensive looking, but not overly fancy. It had a well used feel to it. A large window took up a portion of wall and was currently covered by drapes. During the day, it probably let plenty of natural light into the room. A fireplace was set into another wall. It didn't have a chimney, so Liam assumed smoke was removed magically. The large wooden desk off to one side had a few stacks of paperwork waiting for Celestia’s signature to grace them. A nest of cushions laid in the corner, next to a sizable bookshelf stuffed to its limits with books in various stages of wear.
That reminded him; Liam hadn’t checked out a new book from the library before his departure. He would have to make his way back there later.
He grabbed one of the cushions from the nest and found a spot out of the way to sit down. He leaned against the wall and sat patiently, waiting for Celestia to arrive. The seconds stretched into minutes and Liam quickly found himself bored. If he'd known how long he'd be waiting, he definitely would have checked out another book before coming. Looking for something to occupy his time, his eyes inevitably rested on the stuffed bookshelf. He doubted Celestia would care if he borrowed something to read until she got here, so he made his way over and began looking over the selection of aging tomes.
Before he could decide on anything, however, the door opened again. Liam turned to see none other than the changeling Queen herself enter the room before the door closed behind her.
"Oh, it's you," she said bitterly.
Liam looked down and pretended to inspect himself. "Huh, so it is," he said jokingly before turning back to the shelf. He just grabbed a book at random and returned to his seat. It appeared to be about Equestian law. "Celestia wanted to talk to you too?"
"I was summoned, yes. Snooping through Celestia's things, are we? What would she think if she caught you in the act?" She walked over to the desk and started rifling through the paperwork there. She was going too fast to actually read anything on the pages, but she went through each one before putting them back how she found them and opening the desk drawers to search through their contents. Liam raised an eyebrow at that.
"Probably nothing compared to if she caught you going through her desk."
"She could have you punished if she found out you were going through her study looking for, say, books containing dark magic." Was she trying to blackmail him? What would even be the point in that? Liam just smiled.
"The thought of punishment doesn't seem to be stopping you."
"Oh, please. Unlike you, I would never be caught snoop-" Just then, the door opened, revealing the royal sisters in all their glory. Their eyes immediately landed on the changeling. Chrysalis froze, snout halfway in one of the desk drawers. Celestia smiled in amusement and made her way into the room.
"My my, Chrysalis. Snooping through my desk while I'm not here?" The changeling queen withdrew her snout, now green with embarrassment. "May I remind you that I am a centuries old politician. I learned not to leave sensitive documents out for prying eyes to see before Equestria was a nation. Just make sure to put everything back when you're done with it."
Chrysalis slammed the drawer closed and walked over to the nest of cushions before dropping down on top of them with a huff. Then she glared at Laim, as if her getting caught was his fault.
“Hello Liam,” Celestia said. "I see you have a different book than the one from this morning. What are you reading now?"
"I just grabbed something from the shelf over there to pass the time. I think it's something about Equestrian law."
She looked at the cover and gave a slight nod. "Ah, Golden Gavel's Guide on Governing Jurisdiction. I'm afraid that one is quite dry and uses a lot of jargon. You might find Lotus's Logbook on Legal Legislation a much easier book to start with."
"I'll keep that in mind, Celestia. If I'm going to overthrow you and become king, I'll have to know how the law works," Liam said with a joking smile. She giggled at the joke, but someone else didn't seem as amused. An angry snort jostled the pair from their reverie and Liam looked over to see Luna still standing in the doorway, glaring at him. He seemed to be getting a lot of those recently. He figured the diplomatic approach would be best here.
"Good evening, Princess Luna. I didn't mean to ignore you," he said with a slight bow of his head.
Instead of greeting him back, she looked to Celestia. "Sister, what is this about? Why have you gathered us here?"
"Yes, I suppose we should get to that," Celestia replied as she became more serious. "Come in and close the door. This should be between just the four of us."
Uh oh, that can't be good, Liam thought. There was only one thing that the four of them would have gathered to talk about. Luna closed the door, but remained stood in front of it. Celestia lit up her horn and stole a cushion from the changeling queen's horde, earning her a glare before she took a seat by her desk.
“I’ve gathered the three of you to discuss what happened last night when the treaty between Equestria and the Hive was signed.” Her horn lit up again, and a stack of papers flashed into existence next to her. “I finally had a moment to read over what was agreed to, and I had no objections to anything until I got to the end.”
She floated over a page and began to read some of the text out loud. “Possession of the human residing within Canterlot Castle will be passed to the ruler of the Hive upon the signing of this document by all relevant parties.” She put the page down and looked over the occupants of the room with a scrutinizing glance. “Would anyone like to guess one of the many problems I see with this statement?”
When no one spoke up, she pointedly looked at Luna before she continued. “Why don’t we start with the obvious and work from there? Luna, what were you thinking, trying to enslave someone?”
Luna flinched back like she had just been slapped. “E-Enslave!? Sister, I did no such thing!”
"That's not what this document says."
"That was not the intention of that statement, Celestia!"
Chrysalis perked up slightly at that. "It wasn't?" she asked. Everyone's attention shifted to her and she continued. "When I asked that I gain possession of the human, I was under the impression that I would gain ownership of it." Luna looked shocked by this revelation for some reason.
Yeah, just pretend that I'm not here. That's cool. Being referred to as "the human" and "it" isn't weird or anything, Liam thought.
Celestia spoke up again. "I have already told you that Liam is not a possession to be owned, and neither is any other sentient creature. The lawyer in me feels the need to point out that the wording of this statement would not give you possession of Liam, even if slavery was accepted here." Now it was Chrysalis' turn to look surprised.
Celestia reread part of the document. "Possession of the human will be passed to the ruler of the Hive. As per previous agreements read and signed by you, Chrysalis, the Hive is part of Equestiria. You will govern over your people, and you will retain your title as Queen of the Changelings, but you will answer to me. You agreed that I would rule over you, therefore I am the ruler of the Hive." While Chrysalis sat there letting that sink in, Celestia looked to Liam with a sly smirk. "Congratulations Liam, you are once again a free man." Now it was his turn to sit in stunned silence. That had been a roller coaster.
What many didn't realize is that while Equestria was officially a diarchy, it’s two rulers did not have equal power. Liam had asked Celestia about it once and she explained that there were multiple reasons behind it. Mostly it was to prevent repeating history. Before Luna’s banishment to the moon over a millennium ago, Equestria had been a true diarchy. When Luna turned into Nightmare Moon, it had nearly caused a civil war that Celestia just barely managed to contain. When she returned, the sisters had discussed it and came to the conclusion that one needed to have more official power than the other. Celestia was the obvious choice for this role, as she had not been gone for centuries.
Celestia looked back to Luna. "If your goal was not to enslave Liam, then what was it?”
It took Luna a moment to respond. “I was trying to be rid of him.” She said unashamedly.
“Clearly, but why, Luna?”
“He is a nuisance.”
Celestia deadpanned at that statement. “Luna, the two of you have hardly said two words to each other since Liam’s arrival to Equestria. It was clear from the beginning that you didn’t like him. Nuisance to you or not, that does not give you the right to try pawning him off on someone else through the legal system.”
“Not to me! He is a nuisance to you, sister!” Luna shouted. Celestia was clearly confused at the revelation.
“I do not recall Liam ever being a nuisance to me. How did you get that idea into your head?”
“When he arrived, you let him stay in the castle and all of his needs have been met. You have been extremely accommodating, and what does he do in return? He lazes about, doing nothing but eat and read! He does not work, and I don’t think he has left the castle once since he has gotten here! I believe he is... what was that word? A mooch! He is a mooch!” Luna said, pointing at Liam accusingly.
When Luna was done ranting, the room fell silent again. Liam couldn’t believe he'd just been called a mooch by a talking horse.
“Luna,” Celestia started. “Liam is not a mooch. I keep a close watch on everything I can in this castle, and almost none of what you just said is truthful. He may not have a job, but that does not mean he lazes and does not work. I talk to the maids whenever I get a chance, and they say he helps them do their jobs on a regular basis. Just today he was helping them clean some of the spare rooms.”
It was a little weird for the human to find out that the maids liked to gossip about him to Celestia, but it was nice to find out they had good things to say.
“Captain Armor has reported to me on numerous occasions that Liam’s presence has helped improve the moods of quite a few guards. According to him, when Liam walks into the barracks, the troops gather around like foals trying to get him to teach them another card game from his world.”
Liam wasn't sure about the gather around like foals part, but they did like to pester him about card games. You teach one guy how to play Trash, and the rest swarm like locusts. It was all in good fun though. He supposed he'd be excited to learn a few games from another world too.
“And we’d be here all night if I went into what the royal librarian had to say about him.”
What? Liam was in the library all the time and he’d never seen Celestia there once. When had she spoken to the librarian? It made him wonder what she had to say about him.
“I don't know why he chooses to not leave the castle, but that is none of my business. Neither is it yours, Luna."
Wait, Celestia was the one that ordered me to not leave the castle all those months ago. Did she forget that? He'd have to ask her about it later. Now definitely wasn't the time for that.
Luna finally got a word in. "Even so, sister, he selfishly takes up the little free time you have! He is no better than those so called nobles that infest the city!"
Celestia looked baffled for a moment before her expression shifted slightly to... was that anger? Liam had never seen Celestia angry before. Despite the look on her face, she spoke with a calm and measured tone. "Luna, Liam is my friend. That is what friends do! They spend free time together when they can. Between the endless political meetings and whining nobles I have to deal with on a daily basis, it is nice to be able to speak to a friend and joke around for a few minutes. How many friends do you have, Luna?"
The question seemed to catch everyone off guard, Liam included. Luna sat stunned for a second, stumbling for a response to the biting question. She was about to speak but Celestia beat her to it.
"Let me correct myself. How many friends do you have that aren't one of the Elements of Harmony?"
That seemed to shut Luna down real quick. She didn’t try to speak, she just sat there in frustrated silence. When Celestia didn’t get a response she sighed and continued.
“Luna, you do nothing but work. You’re either handling night court or doing paperwork in your room. You’re so cooped up. I’m worried that you aren’t able to see what’s happening around you at times, and this incident only confirms my suspicions. As such, It seems I’ll have to do something similar to what I did with Twilight. I think you need to take some time off and make some friends to spend time with.”
“But sister-“
“And you can start by befriending Liam here, since you so clearly misjudged him. You will not hold night court or receive any official papers until you have become friends with Liam and at least one other pony. It will be Liam's call when he considers you a friend.”
Whoa. That's a lot of responsibility to just thrust onto my shoulders! There's no way in hell Luna will go along with this.
After contemplating for a second, Luna spoke in a near whisper. “But... how are We supposed to do that?”
Wait, what? She actually went along with it? This night was just full of weird twists. Liam felt like he was going to wake up the next day with neck pains from the whiplash.
“That is for you to figure out. Maybe if you asked nicely, Liam would be willing to help you make friends with others. He seems to be good at making friends around the castle. Befriending him is your responsibility, however. Liam will decide when he considers you a friend, and will report to me when he forgives you for what you've tried to do, intentionally or not. Do I make myself clear?”
"Yes, sister," Luna said dejectedly.
Celestia turned to the cushion hoarder in the corner. "I think it would be wise for you to do the same thing Chrysalis. While you don't have paperwork to be doing, and I won't force you to go along with this, it may be beneficial for you to seek forgiveness as well. After all, you are just as guilty of attempting to enslave Liam as Luna is, and the public's opinion on you is already tenuous at best. This may be a way for you to improve your public image. The only reason I am not being more harsh on you is because you are new to being a citizen of Equestria, and may not know the nuances of how things work here. However, should you try something like this again, your punishment shall be much more severe than Luna's, is that understood?"
"Yes, Princess Celestia," Chrysalis gritted through her teeth.
"You may still govern your people, but you answer to a higher power now. I suggest you remember that."
Seeing this side of Celestia freaked Liam out a bit. He was used to the lighthearted joking princess, not the threatening intimidator before him now. He supposed immortality wasn't the only thing that had kept her on the throne for as long as she has been.
"The two of you may return to what you were doing," Celestia said. "I would like to speak with Liam."
Luna's horn lit up, along with the door handle before it swung open. The lunar princess left without another word. Chrysalis shot each remaining party another glare for good measure before leaving as well. And then there were two. Liam began to wonder what Celestia wanted to talk to him about after that episode. He didn't have to wait long, as the door swung closed again and Celestia turned to him. She looked exhausted.
"You alright there, princess?" he asked.
"I'm fine, just tired. But that's nothing new."
"If you say so," he conceded.
"I couldn't help but notice you didn't say a single word throughout that entire conversation."
"I though you had it covered. I had nothing to add, so there wasn't much point in me joining in."
"You are a very passive person, do you know that?" she asked.
His only response was a shrug. She gave an amused snort.
"Never change, Liam. Sometimes I think more ponies should be passive actors. Too many active roles just adds to the chaos of any given situation."
They sat for a few moments, enjoying the silence before she picked back up.
"What is your opinion of Luna's punishment?"
"It was very... abrupt," Liam said.
"I would imagine so. I came up with it on the spot. I've been worried about Luna's nonexistent social life for a while now, and this conversation has only confirmed my fears. To think they would manifest in such a way. I'm sorry you were involved in this, Liam. Something like this never should have happened in the first place."
"Probably not, but you can't possibly know everything Celestia."
"Yes, that is something I've had to relearn many times throughout my life. I suppose I was due for another lesson on that matter. I'm also sorry for involving you further with Luna's punishment. It was a spur of the moment decision. I didn't think you would mind, but I still should have asked if you were okay with it. If you don't want to do it, you don't have to."
"It's fine. It'll give me another way to spend my free time, I guess. I think that was the first time I've ever seen you get angry."
"Admittedly, it doesn't happen that often, but Luna's always had a knack for pushing my buttons."
"Yeah, I get that. Siblings have ways of getting under your skin like no other." She giggled at that. It was good to see Celestia back to her fun loving self.
"That they do. Knowing you for as long as I have, I know you're the type that's quick to forgive, but I ask that you don't immediately let Luna off the hook. Make her work for it. It'll be good for her to be out and about, trying to make friends. She's very abrasive at times, but I hope you two come to enjoy each other's company in the future. If you need anything, or she gets out of hoof, come talk to me."
"Alright," he said simply.
The princess stood and stretched, flexing her wings slightly to work out the kinks. She tossed the cushion she'd been using back with the rest. "I suppose I should hit the hay. Some of us have a kingdom to run, and a giant fireball to fling into the sky every morning," she jabbed. "Feel free to stay here and read as long as you like. I trust you won't go snooping through my desk, not that I keep anything important there anyway. Those stacks of papers are mostly written complaints from nobles that I use as tinder for the fireplace." And with that confession, she was gone.
Liam had a feeling he was forgetting something, but he wasn't sure what. Assuming it wasn't that important if he'd forgotten it, he shrugged it off. He was comfy on the cushion and didn't feel like moving at the moment, so he decided to take Celestia up on her offer ro let him stay and read. He cracked open the book he'd taken from the shelf. She had been right, there was a lot of lingo in there.
Half an hour later, he gave up trying to decipher the mess of legal jargon and returned the book and cushion to their original spots before heading for the door himself. As soon as his hand touched the handle he remembered what he'd forgotten. He never asked Celestia about him not being allowed to leave the castle.
Oh, well. There'd be plenty of opportunities to inquire about it later. For now he just wanted to head back to his room with the intent of getting a good night's rest.