“Alright Luna, you can ask a question now.” Twilight was still tired, and wanted this to be over as soon as possible. She knew she should have scrapped that wretched machine the first time she used it.
“Thank you Twilight Sparkle. I shall make my query with ardor.” The younger princess said, trotting over to the speaking horn. “I have made several friends since my return who enjoy the night, but even they sleep during most of the dark hours. So I am still curious: What if I met more ponies who are awake at night?”
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Princess Luna: Vampony Hunter
It was a fine night. The pegasus ponies had cleared the skies, making the stars visible. The unmarred moon was at its height. The summer air was warm against Luna's pelt as she stood upon the balcony outside her room. She spread her wings and took flight, eager to explore this new Equestria further.
Luna was used to being alone during her nights, but since her return she had noticed more ponies awake in the late hours. It was likely do to cheaper sources of artificial light, and the better control of the dangerous creatures that once lurked in the shadows.
Lights were scattered across the matte surface below her, like a reflection of the stars above. She loved the stars, they reminded the celestial sisters of their youth. Lost in her memories of times long ago, Luna almost missed the three ponies leaning against a fence in the field below her. Almost.
Celestia had been urging her sister to meet new ponies, and this seemed a perfect opportunity. Luna landed and addressed the ponies before her, remembering the voice lessons she'd received from dear Lady Fluttershy, “Greetings subjects! It is I, Princess Luna, keeper of the Moon, and diarch of Equestria.”
Now that she was on the ground, Luna got a better view of the ponies. She knew fashions had changed since her absence, but these were some of the strangest looking ponies she had ever seen. The were young, perhaps a few years the junior of the Elements of Harmony. There was a filly (a unicorn) and two colts (an earth pony and pegasus), at least she assumed they were colts, despite the fact that they wore more makeup than an Appleloosan whore. Each of them wore a long black coat, even though it was quite warm, and bulky silver-grey jewelry. While she was inspecting them, the three ponies managed to recover from the sudden appearance of royalty.
“Duuude. It's really her.” The pegasus colt said. All three knelt in a deep bow. “We are yours to command, oh Mistress of the Night.”
Luna ruffled her wings. She had never been addressed like this before, not to say that she didn't like it. “Arise my little ponies, it honors me to see you enjoying my night.”
“We are creatures of your night, oh Mistress.” The unicorn said. “We shun the day and its burning sun, and those who worship it.”
These ponies were acting very strange, but maybe it was just some new cultural aspect that Luna hadn't come across before. She wondered if it would be rude to ask about it, but decided the best way to make new friends was to find out as much about them as possible. “You are unlike ponies I have met before. Tell me, what makes you treat the night and day so differently?”
“That's simple, Mistress.” Said the earth pony, “We're vampires.”
The moon sister's ageless heart stopped. Her voice shaking, she asked, “What did you say?”
“We're vampires.” To demonstrate the three ponies smiled, baring unnatural fangs.
“No.” Luna whispered.
This couldn't be possible, surely they had all been destroyed, her sister would not have allowed them to exist. Painful memories leaped across her mind, the time of her madness and rage. Long was Nightmare Moon in the preparation of her coup. She created an army, one that would draw strength from the darkness, one that knew no fear, one that was utterly loyal to her. With dark magic she crafted them, dark spirits encased in corpses. She made them all: ghouls, eohwolves and vampires. Then the war came, she and her army were overthrown. She assumed that they had all been wiped out. But here they were, calling her mistress and besmirching her night. Well no more, she made them, and she would unmake them!
“HALT, VILE CREATURES!” The Royal Canterlot Voice seemed appropriate for this situation, it was the voice she used to command them after all. “THOU SHALT NOT BEFOUL EQUESTRIA WITH YOUR EXISTENCE ANY LONGER!”
The ponies before her were terrified. It had been cool to meet the moon princess, but now they had no clue what she was talking about. They slunk down and slowly backed away.
“YOU WILL NOT ESCAPE ME, SPAWN OF MY SIN!” A beam of silver light appeared above Luna's horn, sickle shaped, like the waning moon. The pegasus bolted, but the blade of light sliced through the air, and his head fell to the ground. The other two ponies screamed. The earth pony tried to run, but the princess tore a fencepost from the soil and impaled the colt, pinning him to the ground.
“THERE THOU SHALT STAY 'TIL I CAN REMOVE THINE HEAD.” Luna now turned her attention to the unicorn mare groveling at her hooves.
“Why are you doing this?” She asked.
“YOU ARE VAMPIRES. THE WRETCHED CREATIONS OF NIGHTMARE MOON! I OWE IT TO MY PONIES TO HUNT DOWN AND DESTROY THE MISTAKES OF MY PAST.”
“We're not really vampires!” The filly wailed.
“I WILL NOT FALL FOR YOUR GUILE.”
“We're not! We just pretend to be! We dress up like this to be cool, look.” She brought her hooves to her mouth, then lifted them for Luna to see. Lying there were two fangs, an inspection of the unicorns mouth revealed nothing but two rows of perfectly normal teeth.
“Oh dear.” Luna said, looking at the two dead ponies, then back at the unicorn. “Oh dear. This isn't good.”
The unicorn looked up at her, and Luna looked back. She had to figure out what to do. She looked at the bodies, then the mare, then back at the bodies. This was going to be a long night.
--=(O)=--
The palace was silent. All the hallways were deserted and the rooms were dark. Celestia loved this time of night, it was the only time she had any semblance of privacy. Following her usual nightly schedule, the solar princess was in her study reviewing paperwork. Luna's return did take some of the workload off her shoulders, but there was still plenty to go around. It was true that she could now sleep through the entire night, but a thousand year old habit is hard to break. While going over a particularly dull budget plan she heard the sound of hooves passing by her door. Luna was home from her flight early.
Celestia silently left her room so she could chat with her sister. “You're back early Luna.”
The lunar mare froze, with a nervous voice she responded. “Y-yes, I um, tired myself out.”
As she peered through the dark hallway, Celestia could see that her sister was filthy. She was covered from head to hoof in mud, and she carried a dirty shovel in her magical grip. “My goodness Luna! What have you been up to?”
“Digging... Uh um, gardening.” The dark mare seemed rather skittish tonight. “I've been gardening.”
“Well, that's nice I suppose. You seem to have gotten a bit dirty though.” Celestia said, looking at the trail of muddy hoofprints leading up the hallway.
“They were big plants.”
Celestia raised an eyebrow, she could tell her sister was hiding something. “Is anything the matter Lulu? You seem preoccupied.”
“I am fine, just tired from... gardening.” Luna knew that look, it was the I-know-you're-not-telling-me-something-and-that's-okay-but-I-wish-you'd-open-up-to-me-because-I-love-you-and-will-help-you-through-any-problem-you-have look. “I think I will take a bath and lie down. Good night sister.”
“Good night Lulu.” Celestia watched her sister attempt not to rush down the hall. She let out a sigh and returned to her study. Something was bothering her sister, but the solar mare knew that pressuring her to talk wouldn't help. She'd let Luna wash up and rest, then bring it up at breakfast. After all, how bad could it be? It certainly couldn't be worse than that incident at the zoo.
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The images on the screen flickered to a stop. Luna blinked a few times before saying, “What atrocity was that?”
As if Twilight needed more proof that using this machine was a bad idea, here it was. The unicorn tried to comfort the moon princess. “Don't worry, it's just a hypothetical scenario, it doesn't mean you'd really do something like that! Maybe the machine only shows the worst-case scenario. I knew this was a bad idea, maybe we should call it a night. I'll just bring this thing down to the incinerator.”
Twilight's magical aura surrounded the machine before Luna looked up, as if coming out of thought. “Nay, Twilight Sparkle. I was not shocked by my behavior, but by these ponies who parade around as vile ghouls.”
She knew it was too good to be true. Twilight dropped the device back in place and returned to her seat. Luna spoke again, “Sister, do ponies really perform such an awful masquerade?”
“It's true. It has become quite popular in fact, especially among the younger generations.” Celestia explained.
“But why would anypony want to associate themselves with a creature bread of evil, whose only function was to cause sickness and death?”
“You have to remember Luna, things change over time. History becomes legend, legend becomes myth, and myth becomes story. And stories change with each telling. Eventually, the villain becomes more desirable than the hero, and what was once a possessed corpse becomes a charismatic character.”
“You did destroyed them all though, right? All the real ones.” Luna's eyes were almost pleading as she looked at her sister.
Seeing her sibling's troubles Celestia's voice became strong and reassuring. “Yes, they're all gone. I lead the attacks on their bases personally. There hasn't been a confirmed case of vampirism in almost nine hundred years.”
Luna was relieved. She had not thought about her dark side's creations since her return, but knowing that they were gone lifted a weight she had not known she'd been carrying. She could now move through the night with the confidence of knowing that there was nothing out there more terrifying than herself.
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Disclaimer:
Luna hasn't killed anypony, and probably wouldn't have acted so hastily if faced with this scenario in "real life." The What If machine was likely just picking up on her intense desire to protect her subjects and amend her crimes.