To my husband, Corn ‘Boot Camp’ Husk;
Well, you had an eventful week. When you come home, please bring Slate with you, I’d love to see him. Also, remember, sharing your love won’t reform them, just having them share theirs. He has to consider you and Lance as friends for him to look all beautiful and stuff.
Regardless, you’re getting rather close to Lance. I don’t like this one bit, don’t tell me you forgot about us. Also, I am your WIFE. Lance cannot get too close to you, I forbid it. Skate’s fine though, just don’t treat him as a pet.
I did find the record player, after searching a very long time around the house. It still works well, except when I put in Sgt. Pepper”s Lonely Hearts Club Band, the needle seemed to get stuck at the end. I think that record might be scratched up a little. It was making all these weird noises.
So, Jack’s happy about your new friend/pet/Ling/whatever, as he knows that those Changelings can be better creatures.
Sparky doesn’t exactly care, but even she had to admit that that was very cute.
So, Jack’s been heading out to see Dame Moondancer more, and indeed, you hit it right on the nose. His girlfriend is a purple Unicorn. She’s very nice, and respects us.
Also, Jack keeps claiming to give Changelings a chance to anyone that says that they are monsters with no hope of redemption. He seems very adamant on his stance. Also, he’s been listening to a ridiculous amount of Dawn Lemon. I’m no longer concerned about you dying in the war as much as I am that Jack will start a new one. Civil rights movement, fun. To be fair, I teach about the last civil rights movement. You know, the one where the Earth Ponies rose up against the Unicorns because they were being treated unfairly in Unicorn-centric towns. I know just how awful that was for everypony in Equestria. I don’t think I could handle one happening during my lifetime, especially not one that’d start a war. Not t9 mention, a war were we’d be hopelessly outnumber because of the Changeling queen’s production rates.
To avoid all headaches, bring Slate back home in his disguise. In his default form, he’ll be treated like a crappy band in the nightclub. Perhaps he’ll even be treated like a witch from Neighlem. Just disguise him, Corny.
Speaking of headaches, mine’s gotten worse. I got you letter a couple days ago actually. I felt bad for the mail pony, he looked like he’d been run ragged! I read about you wanting me to go to the doctor. So, I obliged yesterday. They ran a quick series of scans, checked my pulse, and then asked me for some general questions. When I said 8 had a headache, the doctor comically jumped out of his seat and rushed me over to get my head checked.
I didn’t get the results, I’ll be getting those tomorrow. I hope to Celestia that it’s nothing too terrible. Perhaps it’s just an unusually painful headache, I highly doubt it, though.
The headache’s been steadily ramping up in intensity. It almost seems that I wake up with a worse headache than what I had the day before.
So, aside from that depressing news, Sparky!
Now, Sparky’s been reading some books. She now tolerates Changelings, it still isn’t equality, but it’s a start. She really hates Jack’s constant Dawn Lemon songs, and asks where all the Rock and Roll is. Naturally, I don’t know because I’m not the owner of all the records in the house, so I just shrug.
Speaking of which, they both miss you as well. Jack misses you for reasons such as Changelings, a great taste in music, and the fact that you’e an awesome dad.
Sparky misses you, but she misses you because you were quote,”The only person in the house who had sense.”
I felt attacked.
Regardless, she still misses you for reasons such as the fact that you were an awesome dad, played catch when she asked, and didn’t question her when she wanted to do a typically masculine thing.
The entire household misses you Corny. It’s not just limited to me.
So, the questions have kind of already been answer in this letter.
I’ve talked about the children, except I didn’t mention that Sparky’s kind of tired of Jack. She’s 17, and she’ll probably move out when she gets the chance. She probably could.
However, in celebration of her 17th birthday. She went out and got a job. She really wants to be in the military, but she isn’t quite old enough for that yet. She currently works at the sporting goods store in the Ponyville mall.
Jack is playing peace activist and isn’t scared of starting fights, as I’ve mentioned. He hasn’t gotten physical yet, but I can tell that sometimes he really wants to punch the pony upside their head.
So, my life is going well. However, I'm so bored. I love being a teacher, but getting the summers off tends to leave me incredibly bored. Three months of nothing to do. You may call me a workaholic, but I think it’s just AD/HD or something of the like. I haven’t been tested for it, but I don’t know if it’s really a problem I have to address.
As for my health, you already know how bad that’s going. I have an ever-intense headache, and I’m still working on trying to fix it. It makes these letters a little harder to write, but I can still remember several things, thankfully.
Other than the massive headache, the doctor says I’m healthy. So, I say it’s the only thing we have to worry about.
That about concludes my letter today, not much else to discuss.
Corny, come home soon, we all miss you.
With all love and affection;
Chrissy.
PS:
I too like Aged Cheddar’s. I sure hope you remembered to fly when you got there though, I don’t want to remind you.