Those unicorns think they’re so amazing. Trotting around with those great big horns sticking out of their head. Earth ponies do just as much work without wings or a horn. Which makes us better
“Chocolate!” yelled my mum Neo. “Get in here! Now!”
I sighed. Mum was a great pony, but she could be frustrating sometimes. She is the Icecream Horse of Ponyville. She goes around town every day selling icecream to everypony. One day I will grow up and inherit the icecream trolley. Maybe. I think she’s pregnant again
I trotted downstairs. Mum said into the phone, “Okie. Bye” and hung up.
“Choc, I have something very important to tell you,” she said gently. “The-”
“Mum, don’t worry. I’m thirteen, I won’t get traumatized or anything.”
“Fine then. The pegasi have retreated to Cloudsdale. Which means only the unicorns and earth ponies remain. Now, I don’t want you to have any contact with any unicorns anymore. They are dirty, vain creatures full of dark uncontrollable magic. Got it?”
I’d never heard Mum speak like that before.
“Uh- okay then.”
“Good. You can go now.”
I went back to my room.
I drew a tiny unicorn and labeled it “Octa”. Octa was my ex-girlfriend who was now probably telling all her friends I was an ungrateful little colt who used every filly he could find.
I stabbed the pony several dozen times and pushed it away in disgust. She was the ungrateful filly. What a loser.
I looked out the window and saw three unicorns beating up a little blue earth filly. The leader seemed to be the spiky haired purple colt who was kicking her.
I opened the window.
"Hey!" I yelled. "Leave her alone! She did nothing to you!"
"She did so!" shouted the purple unicorn.
"Oh yeah? What then?"
"She's an earth, she exists, she is worthless!"
"So what are you then, a rhino? How does that make you better?" I snarled.
"Shut up! You don't know anything about me!"
"Don't I?" I said viciously. "Pretty sure you're just an ignorant unicorn who thinks they're so bucking great because they can do magic. Well I've got news for you, horn-face! You and your silly horned friends can just go buck yourselves back up to Canterlot, because nopony gives a hay what you think!"
“What in the hay is- Oh my lawrd!”
A familiar southern accent sounded in the street. Applejack.
She was so hot with her blonde mane, loosly tied like her tail, and her deep green eyes...How I wish.....never mind.
She helped the bruised and bloodied earth pony up.
“You ‘kay sugarcube?” she asked. The filly murmured something in return.
“Good.”
She turned to the spiky haired colt and his friends.
“That’s it! Ah’m sick to death of yer cuttin’ comments and yer magic. Run back to yer mama Celestia because I’m declarin’ war on the unicorns!”
They stood there gormless, mouths wide open.
“GO!” Applejack roared.
They ran away.
Applejack turned to me.
“You - You have the right idea. What’s your name, little colt?”
“Ah - Chocolate, Orange Chocolate Chip” I stuttered.
“Well Orange Chocolate Chip,” she said, “come to one of the army open days at some point. Standing up to the horns like that, you’d make a great soldier”
“Th-Thank you, Applejack” I said.
----------
The next day there are rumours the unicorns will be barricading themselves in Canterlot because of the pony wars. There are only a few horns in school. There’s Lightning, who’s pretty much a smart Pinkie Pie with musical talent, and Cadence, a horn named after the cross breed Mi Amore Cadenza, are the only one’s I know.
Applejack instructed me on language yesterday, Unicorns are horns or hornies and alicorns are just cross breeds. Earths are the one true, pure race. Pegasi are feathers or wingers. More other, ruder words which I won’t say too, which are only used when talking to a horn or a winger.
Lightning asked me for a ruler. I reply with a rude suggestion. Her eyes tear up and she gallops to the other side of the room. Her horn friends glare at me and I glare back.
Miss Cherilark, Cherilee’s older sister, is trying to teach, but none of the horns are listening because she is an earth. They begin to talk.
“SHUT THE BUCK UP!” I yell “MISS CHERILARK IS TRYING TO TEACH!”
I get a few thankful smiles from the earths, but only snarls from the horns. I smirk at them. They make rude gestures, but I don’t care. I’ve hurt them. That’s what matters.
A messenger pegasus bursts into the class. Before any of us can ask what it’s doing here it says,
“All unicorns have been ordered to Canterlot and any earth ponies over thirteen must repot to Applejack immediately to train for the army” it puffed.
-End chapter 2-