//------------------------------// // Original Books // Story: Google Translate be like: // by Lame Joke //------------------------------// The rustling of pages turning could be heard in the castle as Twilight Sparkle read her book, sprawled on the ground. The amount of words crammed into one page is uncountable, nopony know how the purple alicorn could read all those as fast as Rainbow Dash flies. Heck, nopony even knows how Dash flies as fast as Twilight reads. Now this is getting confusing. Engrossed in her reading, Twilight did not notice the cyan pegasus hover into her room. Dash stood behind Twilight, clutching the remains of her smashed alarm clock. Perfect opportunity to prank the egghead, Dash thought. A piece of paper floated down in front of Twilight, and it slowly drifted onto the book. The alicorn, now aware of the paper, picked it up using her magic. "What's this?" Twilight mumbled, "Kiss my ass- Rainbow Dash!" Twilight turned her head behind, a lecture about kissing ponies' asses already forming in her mind when she got a faceful of the pegasus' backside. The tail strands brushed against Twilight's nose, and she let loose a sneeze. Dash burst out laughing as she took to the air, circling above the bookshelves and clutching her stomach. "Rainbow Dash! That was just... inappropriate!" Twilight shouted, her face turning a bright shade of red, which did not go unnoticed by the cyan pegasus. "Oooh Twi, didn't knew you have the hots for me, pity I'm taken," Dash snickered at the alicorn's discomfort. "Someday," Twilight thought to herself, "I would have to learn that turd generating spell, and use it on Dash," The image of Dash's mouth filled with indigestion was enough for Twilight to calm down. She pulled the pegasus down using her magic, ignoring the defiant yelps of the pegasus. "Why are you here Dash? I was reading a book until you... did your usual sheenanigans," Twilight asked the pegasus. She held out her alarm clock pieces, which made Twilight do a facehoof. "It's the sixty-ninth time, Dash," Rainbow Dash, desperate to avoid the topic, swooped down upon Twilight's book and picked it up. Turning to the cover of the book, she could not help but laugh at the title. "Seriously Twi? A book about reading books?" "Give that back here, Dash! There's more to reading books than you know!" Dash stuck out her tongue and dropped the book, which Twilight caught with her magic. The alicorn glared at the pegasus, quite enough of her messing around. "Just take the clock and go already. I want to read my book in peace," Twilight directed her horn at the ruined alarm clock, restoring it back to its normal status. She floated it back to Dash, who grabbed it with her wing and stuffed it into her saddle bag. "Thanks!" the cyan pegasus said before flying out of Twilight's room. Heaving a sigh of relief, Twilight went back to reading her book of how to read a book. A piece of paper floated down in front of Twilight, and it slowly drifted onto the book. The alicorn, now aware of the paper, picked it up using her magic. "What's this?" Twilight mumbled, "Kiss my ass- Rainbow Dash!" She turned around, preparing to fling the pegasus out of her room, but was met with, well, an ass. However, dat ass wasn't Dash's. Twilight was smart enough to make out that Dash's tail is rainbow, but this tail is pink. "Pinkie Pie!" The alicorn complained. The party pony rolled onto her back, tears rolling down her cheeks as bouts of laughter escaped her mouth. Twilight, annoyed, directed her glare of doom towards the pink pony, which of course did nothing to the boisterous pony. "What are you doing here Pinkie?" "Well, I came here to check what book you were reading! Since you looked so focused, no, too focused in your book, I've decided to play a simple prank on you!" Pinkie bounced around the library, picking out random books from the bookshelves, "Did it put a smile on your face?" "Well, I would be smiling if I could read my book peacefully without any pony disturbing- hey!" Pinkie had suddenly appeaed in front of Twilight. Picking up her book, she turned to the cover and nearly choked. "A book on how to read books? That's like, a lecture on how to listen to a lecture, which you had given in the School of Friendship last week!" Pinkie chuckled at the absurdity of the book title. "Anyways, I'll just borrow these books from you. Bye Twilight!" Pinkie hopped out of her room humming a song, leaving a disgruntled Twilight with her book on how to read books, which she returned to reading. A piece of paper floated down in front of Twilight, and it slowly drifted onto the book. The alicorn, now aware of the paper, picked it up using her magic. "What's this?" Twilight mumbled, "Kiss my ass- Rainbow Dash! Or Pinkie Pie!" The alicorn turned around for a third time, before realising she had stupidly fallen for the same prank thrice in a row. She could hear her mother saying in her mind, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me thrice, just go commit die,". She was, again, met with a pony's flank. This pony was also different, with a flowing tail of green, blue, purple and pink and a white coat. "Princess C-Celestia?" Twilight spluttered, confused why her mentor would play such a retarded prank on her. "Hi Twilight, just wanted to know what are you doing. You looked so engrossed in your book, I could not help but prank you," Celestia smiled. Twilight was speechless. Celestia floated the book that Twilight was reading closer to herself, and studied the title of the book. Then she let out a snicker. "A book on how to read a book?" Celestia returned the book to Twilight while laughing before exiting the room. Twilight was left confused. "Screw this," she thought to herself, and returned to reading the book on how to read a book. A piece of paper floated down in front of Twilight, and it slowly drifted onto the book. The alicorn, now enraged with the stupid prank, did not turn around or even read the paper. Using her magic, she detected a pony standing behind her, and held the pony still. She took to the air, her eyes filled with malice and stared at the pony. "LEAVE ME ALONE YOU MOTHERFUCKER! I HAD ENOUGH PRANK FOR A LIFETIME" Shining armor blinked at Twilight, confused. "That was the ticket to the Grand Gallopping Gala, Twilight, I'm not playing any pranks. And how do you know I fucked my mother?"