//------------------------------// // Nice to Meat You // Story: Domestic Drabbles of Discord's Dimension // by GeekCat //------------------------------// "Thank you all for coming to this summit," Twilight Sparkle said. "I'm eager to host this event, and to hear news from your nations!" "Let's hope it won't be like...that one particular meeting," a griffon said with a haughty sniff, looking down his beak at Discord. He grinned, a halo appearing above his head as he kept his hands clasped in front of him. "Anyway," Twilight said, shooting a look at Discord. "Let's start by sharing some of the recent news and upcoming events in your kingdoms." Thorax started rambling about an art gallery they had just opened in the hive. Discord tuned him out, instead glancing out the large window and thinking of the chaos he could cause once the meeting was over. After some more tuned-out rambling, Fluttershy leaned against his side, and he brushed his fingers through her mane. He glanced back over at the representatives, noticing that Queen Novo was just finishing up a conversation about a festival that the hippogriffs were about to host. One of the griffon representatives spoke up next. "Our efforts to rebuild Griffonstone are going well," he said. "And we have a few events lined up to raise more money for architectural development." Discord was about to tune him out again, but then the griffon said, "For example, next weekend we will have a large barbeque with free-will donations. We hope to see some inhabitants of your countries come." Discord's ears perked up. Ember and the king of the Absynnians looked intrigued, while others looked confused. "A barbeque?" Pinkie said. "Is that like a party?" The griffon blinked. "Well...in a way, I suppose. A barbeque is a gathering of creatures who all get together to cook and eat..." he paused, looking at each of the ponies worriedly. "...meat." The room was silent for a second. Discord bit his lip and glanced down at his wife. She had tensed up a little, but her expression was calm. "My apologizes," the griffon said. "I forgot that most of you here don't like to eat meat." Twilight glanced at her friends. "It's alright," she said. The others nodded. "And maybe some ponies would like to attend...just without eating anything." The griffon paused. "That would be very kind," he said. "Other than the barbeque, there are no new events we're planning. We'd like to see how this event goes first." The group chatted for a bit, Ember and the king of Absinyians briefly talking about meat-based foods in their kingdoms. He looked down at Fluttershy, who was tightly gripping onto his arm and looking a bit green around the gills. The other ponies of the group maintained calm expressions, but also looked a bit green. Spike and Thorax also looked a little disturbed. Soon, though, the king of Absinyans segued into talking about a sort of fish cookout that they would be hosting soon, and then other, non-food-related events. Fluttershy and the other ponies relaxed, and Discord breathed a silent sigh of relief. The meeting ended without much further incident. Everyone talked and caught up afterward, until they all realized they simply could not put off going home any longer and bid their farewells. Once the last ambassador was gone, Discord snapped his fingers, creating portals for all of his friends to use. "Goodbye and good night, everyone!" he said, tipping a hat to them as he scooped Fluttershy into his arms. They waved goodbye as Discord dived back into his portal, which zipped closed behind him. He teleported them into the kitchen and started slicing fruits and vegetables, while Fluttershy got down some plates and poured them some milk. "That meeting was nice," she said. "I hope you weren't too bored." He scoffed, tossing an apple into the air and slashing at it with his knife. "It wasn't too bad. I behaved myself," he said. With a smirk, he added. "Mostly..." "Discord..." Fluttershy said. "I only played a teensy prank on Twilight!" he said. "I added a few extra bullet points to her royal itinerary. I think she'll notice before she goes through with 'Profess romantic love for books publically' or 'Honk like a goose at the tea party'." He chuckled to himself. Fluttershy shook her head, though there was a smile on her face. "Oh, what am I going to do with you?" "I can think of a few things," he purred, wrapping his tail around her waist. Her face turned bright red, and he laughed, missing the fruit he had just thrown into the air. She tried to shake away her flustered expression, gently pushing his tail away. Still blushing, she said, "A-anyway, were there any events they mentioned that you thought sounded interesting?" One came to mind, but he shoved the thought away. "Eh. I was only barely paying attention to them. Nothing really caught my eye, honestly. What about you, my dear?" She hummed in thought. "Well, that gallery Thorax mentioned sounded nice. It might be fun to see the art the changelings are making now." She tilted her head as she scooped bits of fruits and vegetables onto both plates. "Other than that, nothing really seemed like something I would enjoy. I do wonder how many creatures will go to the barbeque, though..." Discord felt guilty, but quickly shook the feeling off. He hadn't done anything to be guilty about! "Who knows?" he said with a shrug. The two of them finished fixing up the meal, which Discord levitated over to the table. They both sat and ate, discussing the meeting, the sanctuary, and other things. Discord did his best to enjoy the meal, pushing away thoughts about a certain event, one he knew she wouldn't approve of. As the week went by, the thought of the barbeque kept coming into his mind. He shoved it away each time, but that became harder as its date came closer. All I need to do is distract myself on the day of, he assured himself. And that can't be too hard, can it? The day of was pure torture. He could calculate how many miles away the barbeque was...imagine the scent of cooked meat wafting through the air, as flame licked at the flesh of meat...and had to stop himself from teleporting there. He spent the entire morning trying to distract himself. He floated around Fluttershy's sanctuary, helping her with the animals, but she eventually told him that there were enough volunteers that he could go home to relax. He considered begging to stay—being by her side kept his mind off of it—but discarded the idea, knowing that she would be suspicious if he started acting like that. So he went home and floated through their dimension. He redecorated parts of the house, rearranging hallways until he was satisfied with their chaoticness. He was now laying on the couch, eating out of a peanut butter jar with a large spoon, glancing every so often at the clock on the wall. The thought of the barbeque entered his mind again. He groaned, smacking the peanut butter jar against his forehead. "Why can't I stop thinking about that!?" he said. "I've given up meat! I don't want it! I'd probably find it disgusting, after going so long without it!" Still, the memory of a smell—cooked meat—made him sigh, his peanut butter becoming unappetizing the more he thought about it. "Well...maybe a little peek wouldn't hurt," he said to himself. "It's not like I would be eating anything...and it might get rid of this terrible temptation." He tossed his peanut butter aside and snapped his fingers. With a flash of light, he disappeared from the couch and reappeared in a lounge made completely of clouds. With a clap of his hands, the lights dimmed to almost complete darkness, and he laid on a cloud couch in front of the wall mirror. "The Griffonstone Barbeque," he said. His reflection winked at him and clapped its hands, clouds pouring from them and filling the glass. The clouds were pulled back like a curtain, revealing a plaza in Griffonstone, its air filled with smoke and the occasional tongues of fire. A large crowd had gathered, mostly composed of griffons, dragons, and Abyssinians. The occasional changeling or pony was here and there, but most of them didn't seem to be eating anything. He focused instead on what the more sharp-toothed participants were having. They waited in lines, dropping a few bits into buckets as they grabbed their plates, and went down the line, chatting with the griffons manning the grills, who gave them their choice of meat. Large steaks and burgers, steaming and hot, which the guests piled with their choice of topping and condiments. Discord's mouth watered, and he licked his lips. Realizing what was happening, he slapped himself and turned away. "What am I doing?" he said to himself. "I shouldn't do this...I shouldn't even be watching!" Still, he found himself turning back to the mirror, watching the scene. Meat cooking, meat being eaten, the scent of meat and smoke probably heavy in the air...he couldn't help but drool. "Maybe...just one," he muttered. "What could just one secret hurt?" Glancing over his shoulder at the closed door, he panned the image to a grill, the griffon manning it deep in conversation with a pretty young dragoness. Quickly, he reached through the mirror and grabbed one of the steaks off of his grill, snapping his fingers and making a pile of diamonds in the nearest donations bucket. He held the steak close to his muzzle, inhaling the scent. He was already salivating, and he licked his lips. He opened his jaw, letting his teeth form into fangs, and took a large bite out of the steak. He grimaced as he bit into it. Too late, he realized that the steak he had grabbed was nowhere near being fully cooked—the entire inside was pink and cold, only the cooked outside possessing that savory taste he wanted. But it still smelled like cooked meat, and he still felt the urge to eat it. He nibbled at the cooked parts at first, tearing them carefully away from the raw inside. Ah, forget it, he thought, before taking another large bite out of the pink meat. He surrounded his paw with fire and pressed it against the center, steam rising as he continued to heat the inside. Juice, or maybe blood, dribbled down his chin and into his hands. A part of him felt disgusted. Another part was thrilled at the idea of trying something exciting and forbidden. His predator's stomach was telling the rest of him to shut up and enjoy the meat, something he hadn't had in so long. His fangs tore into the steak, smoke rising as his magic cooked it. Still, he ended up taking bites of raw meat every now and again...it wasn't pleasant, but he still continued. Suddenly, the door creaked open. "Discord?" Fluttershy's voice said. "Are you in here? I smelled smoke—" she froze in the doorway, staring straight at him. He saw his image in her wide pupils: large fangs buried deep in a hunt of meat, something that might have been blood dribbling down his chin and hands, a fire covering his paw and lighting up his face in a frightening way. She stared at him for a few seconds, her eyes slowly widening. She glanced over at the mirror, which still showed the image of the barbeque. "Discord...why are you eating raw meat while watching the barbeque?" she said coolly. He gulped, swallowing the meat in his mouth and moving the steak behind his back. "I-I was hungry," he said. "I just helped myself to the first thing I thought of..." She placed a hoof on her forehead with a sigh, a deep frown on her face. "You wanted to go to that barbeque, didn't you?" she said. "Why did you lie, Discord? And why are you hiding in the dark, eating a raw steak?" He lowered his head. She sighed. "Discord, please don't—" He lowered his ears, not wanting to hear anything else. He snapped his tail feathers and teleported away. The first thing he did was fling the half-cooked steak into another dimension, the furthest one he could think of. After that, he washed his face, beard, and hands five times, and brushed his teeth ten times. After that, he felt a little bit better, but still had a heavy, guilty feeling in his chest. I can't go back yet, he thought. She looked...so upset. He shuddered as her expression came back into his mind, the guilt hanging a little heavier and tugging down on his heart. He waited in a far corner of Chaosville, brooding and thinking over what he'd done wrong. He used his magic to create a few extra sanctuary 'spillover' areas, tying them with large ribbons to present them as gifts...if Fluttershy even wanted to speak to him again. But eventually, his stomach growled, and his watch told him it was getting closer to dinnertime. "Well...I have to face the music eventually," he said with a sigh, snapping his fingers. He teleported to their front door, which he opened to step into their living room, keeping his head low. A sizzling sound caught his attention. Is she frying eggs? he thought, slinking closer to the kitchen. But as he approached, he caught a whiff of—something. It seemed familiar, but...not. Like something he hadn't smelled in a long time...yet briefly, very recently. As he took another whiff of it, his mouth began to water, and he licked his lips. That's—no, it couldn't be! he thought. There's no way—! He crept closer and poked his head through the kitchen doorway. Fluttershy was hovering in front of a grill, which they normally cooked haysteaks, hayburgers, and carrot dogs on, and was using a spatula to move something from it to a large plate. It was a steak. A true steak, made of real meat, and sending fumes his way that made his mouth water even more. Fluttershy set the plate at his place on the table, and he noticed that she had used clothespins to close her nose. She set his place at the table with cutlery and a glass of chocolate milk with a swirly straw, her nose still wrinkling every time she came near the steak. With a cough, he knocked on the edge of the doorframe. Fluttershy flinched and looked up at him. "May I enter?" he asked, his tail wringing itself into knots behind him. "You're back!" she said happily, flying forward and throwing her hooves around his neck. "I was worried when you left...I'm so glad you came back." She nuzzled her cheek against his, while he stood completely still, shell-shocked. "And of course you can come in!" she said brightly, taking his hand and leading him over to the table. "I made you something!" "The steak?" he asked, pointing it out as he and Fluttershy floated closer to it. She nodded. "But...why?" She frowned, wringing her hooves together. "Well...after I caught you, I felt bad that you weren't able to go to that barbeque...and that I sounded so harsh talking to you. So I thought I could try and make it up to you. I managed to find some meat in the sanctuary for predators, and I figured I could get some more later..." He tilted his head as he took his seat. "No, I mean...you looked upset when you caught me eating a steak. Why would you make me another one?" She frowned, narrowing her eyes at him. "Discord, I was upset because you were eating a raw steak. Do you know how many diseases or parasites you could have gotten from doing that?" "Well...no. But I'm guessing it's quite a few nasty ones," he said, rubbing at the back of his neck. "To be fair, when I grabbed it, I didn't realize it wasn't completely cooked." "Well, this one is properly cooked and safe to eat," she said, turning as though to fly to her own seat. But instead, she stopped and placed a hoof on his shoulder, eyes widening sorrowfully. "But Discord...I was also upset that you didn't tell me about wanting to go to the barbeque, or that you would have enjoyed eating meat. Why didn't you say anything?" He frowned down at his steak, turning a fork over and over in his hand, transforming it into a knife or back into a fork with each turn. "I...didn't want to upset you," he said. "I know how much you love animals...I didn't want you to know that I do enjoy eating meat, sometimes." "Discord," she said, nuzzling into the crook of his neck. "I would have understood. I do understand. It's true, seeing creatures eat meat is a little...upsetting. And I know I could never do it myself. But eating meat is a part of nature, and I've come to accept that some creatures need to eat meat. I've fed Harry and the ferrets fish, remember?" "Yes..." he said. "But what about that little 'vegan predator' group that you started at the sanctuary?" She blushed. "I started that so that any prey could feel comfortable staying at the sanctuary. There's a separate area that's predators-only, so that they can eat meat in private, without the other animals feeling nervous. And Dr. Fauna, Zecora, and I make sure they get all of their necessary vitamins." "But anyway," she said. "I've never seen you eat meat for as long as I've known you. Have you been...wanting to eat meat this whole time, and bottling it up?" She was frowning, her eyes wide and shiny. "No! No no no no," he said, waving his hands in front of him. "Even before I met you, meat was never high on my list of preferred meals." A scroll rolled out on the floor behind them, showing pictures of various desserts. "It was easy to cut it out of my diet when I reformed. Oh, sure, once in a blue moon it sounded good, but usually something else savory was enough to satisfy my appetite." A pot of noodles covered in peanut butter appeared in the air, a wooden spoon offering some to Fluttershy. She slurped at the noodles, and he continued. "Anyway, today was a very rare occurrence. Knowing about a huge event like that...smelling the cooked meat..." he inhaled, taking in the scent of the meat in front of him. A knife began to saw it into cubes. "It was just too tempting for me, especially since it was something I 'wasn't supposed to have'." He placed a small piece of the steak in his mouth, chewing and swallowing it. "It's good," he said quietly, savoring the savory taste lingering still in his mouth. "That's good," she said, taking the clothespins off her muzzle. Her nose wrinkled, and she quickly flew to the other side of the table. "S-sorry," said, looking a little green. "Even if I understand, the smell of cooked meat is..." She turned away. He blinked, looking down at the steak. "Does seeing me eat meat...bother you?" he asked quietly. She shuffled. "It's...a little bit unnerving..." "Well, how about this?" Discord said. "This steak is the last meat you'll see—or smell—me eat. If I ever feel the urge to eat meat—which, again, is very very rare—I'll do it so that you can't see it. And I promise that it'll be properly cooked." He tapped his chin. "And I can use my magic to make it out of nothing, so...it won't have even come from any creature." Her ears perked up. "That'd...that'd preferable," she said with a smile and a nod. The bowl floated over to her, and she continued to slurp her noodles. "Thank you." He continued to chew on his steak, savoring it without making a show about it. After this...He imagined he wouldn't have a craving for this stuff for a long while.