Domestic Drabbles of Discord's Dimension

by GeekCat


Trials and Thorns

Discord appeared in his living room in a flash of light. "I'm home!" he called, tossing a soaking wet poncho onto a nearby coat rack.

Fluttershy, who was sitting on the couch, lifted her head up from the book in her hooves. "Welcome home!" she said. "What were the monsoons of Kludgetown like?"

"Oh, I've seen worse," he said. "But they were still rather dangerous for the inhabitants. I wrangled that rouge storm and corralled it off into the desert without too much trouble." He flew over and sat down on the couch next to her.

She leaned against his side. "That's good to hear," she said. "And I'm sure Twilight will be happy, too." She smiled. "My day wasn't as exciting as yours. Nothing much happened at the sanctuary, so I've spent most of my day reading."

"Oooh, whatcha reading?" he asked, stretching his neck and twisting it around to look over her shoulder. She nuzzled his cheek, then held the book up so he could see the page she was on.

"It's a book about one of the rarest flowers in Equestria," she explained. "It's called the Fairy Rose." she pointed at a pencil sketch, heavily smudged. It looked like a normal rose to him, unless some of the smudges meant there was a pattern on the petals.

"That's the only known picture of it. Everything else known about the flower comes from what creatures wrote down after they saw it." Her eyes gleamed. "It's said to be a deep, pure black color, with green and blue spots on its petals. And the spots glowed when something magical was nearby!" She sighed, looking at the page. "It sounds beautiful."

"Why's there just one picture of it?" he asked. "If this flower is so great and rare, why hasn't anyone gotten one, or tried growing it themselves?"

"Because there's only one place it's reported to grow," she said, flipping to the cover of the book. On the inside was an old map drawn with jagged ink, a section marked Danger! and Only Enter if No Other Option!, where Fluttershy placed her hoof. "The Changeling Swamp," she said with a shiver. "Thorax says that's where the changelings came from, and where they got the stone for Chrysalis's throne."

"It's a dangerous place, so no one goes there," she continued. "It seems to repel all magic but changeling magic, and it's filled with other swamp dangers...quicksand, predators..." She shivered again. "No one wants to go in there just for a flower."

"But it's supposed to be a beautiful flower, huh?" he said.

"Oh, yes," she said. "Travelers who went into the swamp when there were no other options said that it was the only good thing in that place."

He grinned as an idea popped into his brain. Fluttershy marked her place in the book and set it aside. "But I'm sure that you're hungry, after all the work you've done," she said. "So I made you some peanut butter and pickle sandwiches!" She hopped off the couch and headed into the kitchen.

"Mmm, sounds delicious! You spoil me, dear Fluttershy," he said, floating along behind her. They dug into the sandwiches, while Discord thought about his idea, puzzling it out as he ate.


The next morning started well. He and Fluttershy spent a few minutes cuddling in bed before their stomachs convinced them to get up and make breakfast. After a few bowls of yogurt, topped with fruit in Fluttershy's case and candy in Discord's, Fluttershy kissed him on the cheek and wished him a good day before flying through one of the sanctuary portals.

As soon as she was gone, Discord flew around the house, grabbing supplies and throwing them haphazardly into a large backpack. Once it was full, he snapped his fingers and disappeared in a flash of light.

He reappeared at the border between a wasteland and swamp. His feet landed in some mud, and he stuck his tongue out, snapping up a pair of snowshoes and stepping up onto the mud's surface, shaking the muck off of him. He reached over his shoulder, rustling around in the backpack. He brought out a paper with a rough drawing of the Fairy Rose, looking over it and nodding before stuffing it back into the pack and walking into the darkness of the swamp.

"Okay," he said aloud. "This should be simple enough. I just need to find the flower, grab it, and teleport back out. Easy as pie!" He snapped his fingers, waiting for a fresh apple pie to appear in his paw. But instead, his magic seemed to flicker in the air before petering out.

He sighed. "Guess that book wasn't exaggerating about the anti-magic properties," he said. "Oh well. I packed a lunch, and that's just one extra step: leave the swamp, then teleport back home." He smiled and continued forward with a spring in his step.

"I'll be back before supper. Maybe even before lunch! And oh, I can't wait to see the look on my darling Fluttershy's face when I show her the rose!" He sighed and closed his eyes, letting his mind drift away to blissful thoughts of her smiling, eyes lighting up, her wrapping her hooves around her neck to kiss him and nuzzle him...

He shook his head, slapping himself. "Save it for later," he told himself. "Right now, I've got a flower to find."


He groaned, leaning against a tree and wiping sweat off of his brow, panting. The swamp was terribly humid, and he had been walking for what felt like miles. He had fallen into several puddles that had appeared out of nowhere, so his entire lower body was soaked with muddy water. His snowshoes had slipped off, meaning he had to actually wade through the icky mud, and he had gotten spiderwebs and thin vines caught in his horns.

He brushed the things off of his head and tossed the bundle lightly onto a nearby branch before he lifted up his dragon foot and began pulling rocks and twigs out from between his scales.

As soon as that was done, and he had rubbed a little of the soreness out of his muscles, his stomach gurgled. He sighed. "Might as well break for lunch," he said. "Can't search for anything on an empty stomach."

He unsheathed his lion claws and dug them into the bark of the tree. Using his claws and feet, and pumping his wings for an extra boost, he clambered up to one of the top branches. He took the backpack off and hung it on a thick branch, rubbing at his shoulders. He draped himself across several branches, wrapping his tail around one, and dug around in his backpack, pulling out a brown paper bag.

He opened it up and pulled out an apple and two peanut butter and pickle sandwiches. He licked his lips and took a large bite out of a sandwich, moaning and closing his eyes.

A suddenly cracking sound made his eyes shoot open, his head whipping in the direction of the sound. The branch he had put his backpack on was bending under the weight, coming dangerously close to cracking.

He shouted a few foul words, quickly leaning over and reaching out to grab it. He snagged the sides just in time, as the branch broke and fell down through the other branches, splashing into the mud below.

He sighed in relief and leaned back, holding the backpack against his chest...and noticing that his lunch was no longer there.

He glanced down. Below him, a brown paper sack held futilely onto a branch, but was blown away in the wind. At the very base of the tree, two sandwiches and an apple were slowly sinking into the mud.

Grumbling more curses, he quickly slung his backpack over one shoulder and slid down the tree trunk, wincing as the rough bark scratched his palms and feet. As soon as his feet splashed into the mud, he quickly reached down and scooped up his lunch.

The apple was half-covered in mud, the sandwich he had bitten into only had a corner soaked, and the other sandwich had been completely soaked. A bit more digging, and he managed to unearth the large slice of cheesecake that was going to be his dessert and the chips he was going to snack on, almost unrecognizable underneath the mud.

As he held all of them in his hands, part of the cheesecake fell back into the mud, the remainder of it drooping into a soggy mess. He narrowed his eyes at it before sighing and tossing it over his shoulder, back into the muck. Carefully, juggling everything between his hands and tail, he used his fur to wipe off most of the mud on the apple and chip bag. He regarded his sandwiches, nibbling at the corner of the completely soaked one.

He stuck his tongue out and spat it out, throwing the sandwich as far away from him as he could. He tore the soaked corner off of the other sandwich and dropped it, then leaned back against the tree and ate what was left of his lunch.


He tromped through the mud, munching on his chips as he went. They were, by far, the best part of his lunch. The sandwich had tasted alright, but the pickles had soaked up just enough water to become soggy, ruining the crisp texture he enjoyed, and the apple had still tasted faintly of muck, no matter how many times he polished it.

But none of the muddy water had managed to get through the bag, which left his chips perfectly untouched. He grabbed another handful of the salty snacks and shoved them into his mouth. He chewed on them until they were flavorless mush before finally swallowing, taking a peek into his chips bag. There wasn't much left, maybe a quarter or so, and his stomach was still gurgling.

"I can have a feast when I get home," he said to himself. "Sandwiches, soups, gigantic cakes..." His stomach growled, and he grimaced. "When I get home," he said. "For now, I have to focus on finding the rose."

He continued on his path, wincing as hidden stones and twigs buried themselves in his scales and fur, licking salt and crumbs off of his fingers before taking another bunch of chips.


He had discarded the empty bag of chips a long time ago, after licking out every crumb and speck of salt. Since then, he had acquired a collection of rocks in between his scales and hoof, an array of sore muscles in his legs, a few scratches on his knees and hands from low branches, and a lovely coat of mud.

Thankfully, he had just found a dry rock path. It was hard and rough, hurting the soles of his feet, but at least it was dry, faster to walk on, and didn't hide any rocks and twigs from him.

He glanced up at the branches above, which blocked out most of the light. "I wonder how long it's been," he said aloud. "Surely not that long. My lunch 'break' was pretty short, and I haven't taken that many breaks aside from that..." He sighed. "How hard is it supposed to be to find one flower!?"

A glint of green off to the side caught his eye. "Hmm?" He turned his head. There were glimmers of green and blue standing out in the gloom, past tree branches and vines.

He gasped and rushed in that direction on all fours, uncaring as he plunged back into the cold muck. He crashed through the tree branches, wincing as splinters scratched and dug into his skin.

He stopped just in front of a hill of damp earth. Surrounded by trees and mud, it was covered with winding, thorny vines, and dotted with large black roses, speckled with dots of blue and green light.

"Oh, thank chaos and disarray," he said, slumping down into the mud. He carefully reached into his backpack and pulled out the paper with a drawing of the flower, holding it up to one of the closest blooms and comparing them. "Thank entropy and disorder," he groaned, shoving it back into his backpack.

With some more rummaging, he pulled out a pair of scissors. He stood up and carefully stepped onto the hill, doing his best to avoid the thorns.

Bending down, he opened the scissors and began to cut the roses off of the thorny vines. He pricked himself a few times, but still continued until he was holding ten of the roses.

He held them in his claw, glaring at the few tiny thorns that were still on the stems. "I guess I'll need to pull those off," he said. "I don't see what was so hard about that. I mean, the walk wasn't pleasant at all, but wouldn't some pony go for it anyway at some point to get a beautiful flower like this?"

A low growl came from the top of the hill. Discord turned and lifted his head, his heart pounding and sinking into his stomach.

A chimera stood at the hill's peak. Its tiger head and snake head were baring their fangs at him, while the goat head was glaring at him, snorting. Its legs were covered in mud. "Intruder!" the tiger head growled.

"Those are our flowers!" the goat head shouted. The snake head hissed. The chimera pawed at the ground, the goat head lowering and pointing its horns at him. With another snort, it charged at him.

With a yelp, Discord turned on his heel and ran. He registered that there were thorns digging into his feet, but the fear he was feeling overrode any feelings of pain he might have felt.

He splashed into the muddy water, panicking as it slowed down his footsteps. Quickly, he shoved the bouquet of roses into his mouth and started to run on all fours.

He plowed straight through everything in his path, still hearing the grunting and growling of the chimera behind him. He tore through branches and vines, and clamored over boulders and logs in his path. Every few seconds he snapped his tail feathers, desperately trying to teleport. Each time, he felt his magic slip away before it could form into a spell.

He glanced over his shoulder. He was still ahead of the chimera, but it was keeping up with him, and didn't seem to be getting tired. With a quick shrug, he loosened the shoulder straps on his backpack, and with a few quick tugs, he pulled it off, throwing it blindly behind him.

An angry roar told him he had succeeded in hitting the chimera. He put all of his energy into running a little faster, glancing behind him again. The chimera's eyes were closed, and it was shaking its goat head, trying to dislodge the backpack from its horns.

He took a sharp right turn and pressed himself against the trunk of a tree, holding his breath as he heard the ripping of cloth and the splashes of the chimera's feet. They passed right by his hiding place with a growl. He shifted just the smallest bit, to watch them out of the corner of his eye, and saw the tiger head sniff at the ground.

"We've lost the trail," she growled. "I can't smell anything in this cursed swamp."

"Why can't we just move?" the snake head hissed as the chimera turned around and headed back towards the flower hill.

"This place is okay enough. We have enough to eat with all those flowers," the goat head said. "Besides, at least we don't have that many intruders disturbing us. Remember what our cousin said about the Fire Swamp?"

"At least if there were intruders we could have something decent to eat," growled the tiger head. "I'm sick of..." Their bickering faded into silence. Discord slowly poked his head out from behind the tree and saw that they had disappeared. He sighed in relief and snuck back to where he had thrown his backpack.

It was shredded into ribbons, its contents scattered through the mud. With a groan of irritation, he bent down and began to sift through the mud, glancing up every few seconds to make sure he was still safe.

After a few seconds of searching, he pulled out a compass covered in mud. He clicked it open and looked at the needle, turning in place until he was facing the direction the needle pointed. It was only a few degrees angled away from the direction he had already been running in.

With a glance over his shoulder, he started walking forward at a brisk pace. Now that his heartbeat was slowing and fear wasn't filling his mind, sensations of pain were finally starting to sink in...including in his mouth.

He glanced down, and remembered he had shoved the bouquet into his mouth in his fright...and the small thorns were poking his lips, tongue, and gums.

"Oooow," he moaned, opening his mouth and letting the bouquet fall into his open paw, spitting out a few of the thorns. "Hopefully the exit isn't too far away...I can heal myself once I'm out of here."

He winced as the next few steps sent more pain into his feet. "Maybe I can hide for a second and pull those thorns out..." he murmured to himself.

His ears stood up as a howl rang through the trees, sounding far off. Another howl answered, sounding a bit closer. He started to sweat, his heart pounding in his chest, as the howls—timberwolf howls, he realized—continued, some of them sounding too close for his liking.

"Running. Running sounds good," he said, shoving the bouquet back into his mouth and dropping onto all fours again, tucking the compass under a wing as he ran straight in the direction it had pointed out to him.


Discord appeared in front of his front door with a flash of light. His feet gave out from under him, and he collapsed on his stomach. His mouth dropped open, tongue rolling out, the bouquet falling onto the ground.

He laid there for a few more seconds, breathing deeply. His panic slowly died down, and his aches and pains returned worse than ever. He wanted to snap everything away, but he was too tired to lift a hand.

A minute or so later, he sighed and pulled himself back onto his feet, scooping up the bouquet. "Fluttershy should be at the sanctuary, so I should have the house to myself," he said aloud. "I'll just lie on the couch for a bit, grab some snacks, then I'll heal myself."

He opened the door, leaning forward and falling through the door more than walking through it. His eyes landed on his goal, the couch—and widened when he saw Fluttershy sitting there, frantically writing something on a scroll. He could feel the blood rush from his face, and he quickly hid the roses behind his back.

He stumbled onto the carpet, the door clicking closed behind him. Fluttershy flinched, her head snapping up to look at him. Immediately, she dropped the scroll and quill and rushed over to him, throwing her hooves around his neck and almost knocking him over.

"Discord!" she cried, peppering his face with kisses. She pulled away, holding his cheeks between her hooves and looking him in the eyes. "Where have you been!? Do you know how worried I've been!? I was about to write to Twilight to find you!" She noticed he was covered in mud and scrapes. "What in Equestria happened to you!?"

She looked ready to panic, so he quickly said, "Fluttershy, it's okay. I'm fine. It's nothing a bit of magic won't fix." He kissed her forehead lightly. "I didn't mean to worry you, sweetness. I didn't think I would be gone for a long time."

"It's nine pm!" Fluttershy said. "You missed lunch and dinner...how did you not notice that?" His stomach growled loudly, and her frown deepened. "Did you even get anything to eat today!?"

"Well...sort of?" he said, rubbing at the back of his neck. "I packed a lunch, but I lost most of it..."

Her eyes narrowed. "What exactly were you doing, where you couldn't make your own food or check the time, and ended up like...this!" she said, gesturing to his mud-covered front.

He grinned sheepishly and brought out the roses. A little bit of mud had splashed onto them, and they had become limp at some point in his running. With a snap of his tail feathers, they straightened up and became clean, and their thorns disappeared. "I wanted to give you these," he said, placing them gently in her hooves. "The most beautiful flowers for the most beautiful pony."

She quietly accepted the roses, looking down at the dark petals with their glowing spots. Carefully, she flew over to the couch and set them down on the dresser next to it. She leaned down and took a deep breath, smelling the roses, her eyes closing for just a second.

Then she flew back over to him and dug her hooves into his shoulders.

"Discord, did you go into the Changeling Swamp!?" she yelled. He nodded. "Meaning you didn't have any of your magic?" He nodded, a bit more slowly. "A place filled with mud, predators, and—" she glanced at his paw "—large thorns?" He bit his lip and lowered his ears, giving a tiny nod.

"You went into a dangerous place, where you couldn't use your magic...where you could have died or seriously injured yourself—to get me some flowers."

"The rarest flowers in the world," he mumbled, fiddling with his thumbs.

She sighed, leaning her forehead against his shoulder. She stayed there for a few seconds, slowly draping her hooves over his back. "I was so scared," she whispered. "You weren't here, and you weren't coming when I called for you...I was so scared."

She began to shake, and he slowly wrapped his arms around her. "Please don't cry. I'm sorry," he said. "I just wanted to do something nice and amazing for you."

She clung to him tighter, and her shaking slowly died down. She looked up at him, her eyes stern, but still a bit damp. "Never do something like that again," she said. "I know you do dangerous things all the time, but...all those times, you have your magic, and I know where you are. Today, you..."

"I'm sorry. I promise I won't do that again. I'll just stick to making my own flowers for you," he said. He kissed her forehead again. She flinched, and he quickly pulled away, running his tongue against his lip. There was a thorn stuck there.

Her eyes lost their sternness and filled with worry. She stretched her neck out and grabbed the thorn between her teeth, quickly pulling it out and dropping it into her hoof. "Your magic is back by now, right?" she said. "You couldn't have come home so quickly if you didn't..."

"It's back," he said. He used his magic to pull and spit out all the thorns in his mouth. But he still felt sore there, and stumbled on his feet as soon as the magic left him. "I just...wanted to rest and get something to eat before I used it to fix myself up." His stomach growled loudly, annoyed at being forgotten.

"Of course!" she said. "You lay down on the couch, and I'll make you something to eat." She flew behind him and pushed him towards the couch, before flying quickly into the kitchen.

He collapsed on the couch, watching the ceiling spin above him, his mind turning into cotton as he sank into the soft couch. The only thing that kept him from completely sinking into unconsciousness was the aching in his stomach, mouth, hands, and feet.

A yellow blur appeared next to him. "I made applesauce with banana and cinnamon," it said it an angelic voice. "And there's soup heating up on the stove." A bowl was placed carefully onto his chest, and a pillow was shoved under his head. A gentle hoof took his claw and manipulated the fingers into curling around a spoon, and helped him guide the spoon from the bowl to his mouth.

He slowly swallowed, pushing the delicious mixture down his dry throat. He coughed. "Oh, sorry. I'll get you some water," Fluttershy said, flying back into the kitchen. Slowly, he let his mind become fuzzy again, his hand moving robotically to bring spoonfuls of applesauce into his mouth.

She flew back next to him, gently pressing a glass against his lips. He carefully sipped the water she poured into his mouth, letting it soothe his dry throat. She set the glass aside once he had finished it off, and he continued to spoon applesauce into his mouth.

She pulled out the few thorns stuck in his lion paw, then flew to his feet, carefully rubbing them with her hooves. "Oh, your poor feet," she said. "What in the world happened in there?" Still rubbing at the soles of his feet, she began to pull out some of the thorns and rocks.

"There was a tree...'n a chim'ra," he mumbled before eating his next spoonful. "And runnin'..."

"Shhh," she said, patting his knee. "Don't say anything now. Just eat and rest, and you can tell me later."

He obliged, continuing to eat his applesauce and sinking his head into the pillow, closing his eyes and letting the fuzzy feeling fill his head, his eyelids drooping shut.

He heard her sigh. "They really are beautiful flowers," he heard her say. "But did you honestly think they'd mean as much to me as...as you do?"

With great effort, he lifted his tail and brushed his feathers against where he thought her cheek was. She sighed and placed a hoof on his tail, holding it close to her for a few more seconds, before she let go and moved closer to his head, carefully holding onto his claw. "Here, let me help you," she said. "Just relax." She guided the spoon into his mouth, and he let himself sink closer to sleep.