//------------------------------// // Chapter 3 // Story: Nine Millimeter Vorpal Sword // by totallynotabrony //------------------------------// Princess Twilight turned out to be extremely thorough.  By the time she was done, she’d even stripped the underwire out of Nancy’s bra.  At least Nancy had her clothes back on before she was made to walk out of the train car when it stopped.  At least she was allowed to walk, if only to an enclosed carriage right next to the train. The carriage was both pulled by horses and seemingly guarded by them.  They all wore metal armor. Two of them rode inside with Nancy. They watched her intently, but said nothing.  That was fine with her. Her hands were still manacled, but she was otherwise able to move between either side of the carriage to look out the windows.  She was glad, too, because apparently these horses had made a society and she wasn’t going to miss seeing it. Though, if they had trains, it shouldn’t have surprised her that they had cities with cobblestone streets and multi-story buildings. Everything was just a little - or perhaps a lot - more fantastical than she was expecting.  Many pastel colors. There was a castle somehow clinging to the mountainside. She saw a pegasus fly past.  Despite all that, it seemed amazing how many things looked roughly similar to her own world, the train being the most obvious example. By this point, Nancy had accepted, though not really internalized, the fact that she was a long way from home.  An all-night interrogation by a talking purple horse would do that to you. At least she wasn’t hungry, having been given some snacks on the train.  There was no way she was relaxed enough to sleep. Aside from the carriage Nancy was in, the dragon who’d stowed away on the train and subsequently been captured had been shackled and escorted to a different one.  Princess Twilight and her entourage rode in a much nicer carriage that even appeared to be gilded.   She noticed the road seemed to be rising above the city, and realized that they were going to the castle.  She pressed her face against the window to get a better look at it, though belatedly realized that if they were taking her there, there was a high likelihood that she was going to the dungeon. The carriage climbed the hill and up to the front gates of the castle.  It was made of some sort of white stone, with a lot of gilding and stained glass.  Nancy almost found herself excited, though as it turned out, yes, she was destined for the dungeon. Princes Twilight made an appearance as Nancy was being led down into the stone passageways.  One of the armored keepers escorting her asked, "Princess, what did this prisoner do to be brought in by you personally?" “She’s accused of killing a dragon.” That got the guards’ attention, and Nancy noticed a distinct change in their attitude.  While she didn't know exactly what each gesture meant, she had begun to notice that horse ears were very expressive. They - carefully - escorted her to a cell.  At some point, the stone of the castle had given away to raw rock cut into the depths of the mountain.  A room large enough for a bed had been hollowed out and blocked off with iron bars. The guards opened the door to let Nancy in, locked it behind her, and then had her stick her hands out through the bars to take the chains off. They left her alone, then.  When they were out of sight, Nancy collapsed on the bed and had the quiet personal freakout she'd suspected was coming.  Considering the situation, she thought she'd held things together pretty well up until this point, However, the uncertainty of what would happen next was even worse than what had already happened to her.  Magic horses, dragons that wanted her dead, AWOL, and no obvious way of going home. Maybe there was a spell for that, but it seemed silly to pin her hopes on magic, not to mention she might still be facing charges.  Probably from her own people, too. How was she going to explain this? She heard approaching hooves on the stone floor.  Getting her face composed, Nancy sat up on the bed.  A horse with a waistcoat, mustache, and monocle stopped in front of her cell.  “Good day to you. Princess Twilight Sparkle has informed me that you wished to speak to a lawyer and asked me to meet with you.  My name is Fancypants.” The few names Nancy had heard so far seemed ridiculous, but this took the cake. He frowned slightly at her attempt to hide a giggle.  “I apologize if I am mistaken.” “No, I'm sorry.  Maybe it’s just the translation magic.  This horse world is keeping me off balance.” “Rather, Equestria is a land of ponies,” he corrected. “Oh, I didn’t know the difference.  I grew up in a city.” Fancypants brushed it off.  “Well, that’s quite alright, so did I.  Now, before we have another surprise conversational twist, may I ask your name?” “Nancy Rodriguez.” “Hmm.”  He seemed to ponder it, looking her up and down as well as he could between the bars.  His eyes lingered on her largest tattoo, which was on her forearm and depicted a robot with a cigar.  “I say, is that an emblem of your people?” If anything, it would be the uniform, or maybe more specifically the patch depicting her Surface Warfare qualification she’d earned aboard her ship.  “No, this is something I had tattooed on just because I liked it. It’s a character from a cartoon I watched. His name is Bender.” Whether Fancypants internalized that or not, she didn’t know.  He said, “I thought it might have been a cutie mark.” “A what?” He turned slightly and indicated the image of three crowns on his hip.  Nancy had noticed similar things on other horse-er, ponies, but had not asked. “It’s a symbol of one’s own special talent,” Fancypants said.  “A rather unique trait to ponies.” He turned back to face her.  “And speaking of my talents, that is why I am here. Princess Twilight said that you would like to speak to a lawyer.” “Did the princess tell you why I’m here?” Nancy asked. “She did not.”  Fancypants looked somewhat uncomfortable.  Nancy suddenly understood. She was literally an alien, and locked in a clammy dungeon at that. “I was...accused of killing a dragon.  I’m not sure what's going to happen next.  I don’t know anything about Equestria’s legal system.” “Well, I have not had many brushes with criminal law myself, but I may be able to explain it to you.” “Wait, you’re not a criminal lawyer?” “I should say not!”  His brows knit. “Or...wait a moment, are you perhaps under the impression that there are lawyers who specialize in criminal law?” “There aren’t?”  It was just another misunderstanding in what was beginning to be a pattern. They talked for a few more minutes.  Fancypants explained what he could. The impression Nancy got was that Equestria's laws were comparatively simple and common sense-based, and in the end everything came down to “the princess said so.”  It was enough to make a human’s head spin. She thanked him for his time.  “It was good to talk to someone else.  I wasn’t sure how much more Princess Twilight was going to put up with me.” “She’s a nice mare,” Fancypants said, “but I will caution you not to trifle with her.  She earned her position honestly.” “Is that the whole horn and wings thing?” “She earned being an alicorn, too.” Nancy didn’t know how that worked, or how to even phrase the question. Fancypants departed and Nancy sat on the bed again.  It was a little chilly in the dungeon, so she rolled her sleeves down. She lay back.  Now that she was alone and lying horizontal, her eyes were getting heavy.  The torches outside the cell still burned, however. There was no way of telling the time, even if her watch hadn’t been confiscated.  Her phone had already run out of battery when it was taken. Princess Twilight may not have understood the human technology exactly, but she had been very careful and thorough to ensure Nancy didn’t have anything she could use to escape.  Though, maybe Nancy shouldn’t read too much into a species that thought digital watches were a pretty neat idea. She thought about the dragon who had also been taken into custody.  His name was apparently Charcoal. He was also probably in the dungeon somewhere. Nancy wondered if there was a stronger case against him than her.  Evidence wise, certainly. But in Equestria, was an attempted murder worse than an actually carried out self-defense? Fancypants had explained that the Dragon Lands were among several semi-autonomous regions of Equestria.  There were regional leaders, such as Princess Ember, but ultimately the closest thing to a central government lay with the princess who lived in Canterlot.  It had been dark, but Nancy hadn’t seen the dragons living in anything that resembled a city. Maybe Princess Ember wasn’t even able to hold a court, even if she had been willing to rather than just lynching Nancy. She stared at the ceiling and wondered if there was a magic spell to get her a JAG lawyer.