Celestia teleported herself straight to Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie. Luckily they were already hanging out together when she showed up. It was pranking time and she knew they would love to join her. She also could use their help as she didn’t know much about causing chaos.
“Celestia?” Rainbow Dash asked looking up at the princess, “what are you doing here?”
“Discord. I’m Discord.” Celestia said, pointing a hoof at herself. “Obviously.”
A knowing look came over Pinkie Pie’s face. Celestia had hoped the mare would figure out what was going on and help her convince Rainbow to play along. Pinkie Pie had her abnormal sense and Celestia planned to use that to her advantage to gain an ally in her battle to not break character.
“OOOOOO YOU’RE ‘DISCORD,’” Pinkie said, air quoting the word Discord with her hooves.
“That I am. Wanna play some pranks with me? I need something to do until tea with Fluttershy!” Celestia said, her smile growing more mischievous by the minute.
Rainbow was very confused but having seen Pinkie just go with it she decided to do the same. Rainbow had learned not to question Pinkie situations too hard and to just roll with it. Plus she was kinda excited for the pranks. “Ight who first?”
Pinkie pie took a pie out of her mane, “I say we go pie some random ponies.”
Celestia smiled “Hiz-I mean YAY! Let's go pie ponies.” She said that was a close one she almost said Hizza. Something discord never said, she wondered if that would count as breaking character. As she pondered she teleported all three of them right into the middle of Ponyville. Celestia watched with amusement as everypony stopped what they were doing to stare at them. EH, who cares about the technicalities, Discord sure wouldn’t so neither would she. Celestia turned to Pinke, “Pinkie what pie flavor is this?”
“Well, I think it might be-”
“PIE FLAVORED” She screamed, throwing the pie right into Pinkie's face. She got her own teammate, definitely unexpected chaos.
“REVENGE IS A DISH BEST SERVED IN A TIN!” Pinkie answered, throwing a pie into Celestia's face.
Celestia hovered more pies in the air, where did she get them? Who knew? Who cares? She raised them high above ponies heads and let them fall. “It’s raining pie, Hallelujah, it's raining pie!” She sang as she watched the pies rain down on random ponies.
Rainbow picked up two pies that weren't splattered on the ground and threw them square in the face of Mr. and Mrs. Cake. “hahahha, you got something on your face.”
The Cakes both picked up pies from behind them and threw them at Rainbow. It didn't take long for all of civilization to crumble into anarchy. Pies flew through the air from all sides. No pony was safe, it was a total warzone and in the middle of it all were three pranksters hiding behind a building.
Celestia turned to her companions and realized she had no idea what to do next. How do you add chaos to chaos to make it more chaotic? She thought as she racked her brain for an answer, being Discord was harder then she thought. BEING DISCORD WAS HARDER THEN SHE THOUGHT. She teleported all the pies out of the sky and onto the ground. She turned toward Pinkie. Please, she thought, please help me do this. “Why Discord, why did you start this fight?”
Pinkie Pie looked at Celestia with confusion, “but you started the fight.”
“Yes, and so did you Discord.” She said smiling at Pinkie Pie. Come on, she thought, pick up the hint.
Pinkie Pie smiled, “Of course! Discord. Because I, also Discord, just can’t resist chaos.”
Celestia smiled at Pinkie, thankful for her odd ability, “Don’t you think there should be more of us, Discord. To cause more chaos and to enjoy it.”
Pinkie Pie smiled “could always use more Discord, there really is never enough. He’s a fan favorite, more screen time for Discord!”
Celestia was a bit confused by this statement but she just rolled with it. She picked up a nearby vase and approached Rainbow Dash. “You are no longer Rainbow Dash.” She said placing the random object on each of her shoulders as if knighting her “You are now Discord, Lord of Chaos.”
Rainbow Dash looked up at Celestia then over to Pinkie Pie who sported a face of pure malice.
“You don’t want a Discord Punishment Party, do you?” Pinkie asked.
Rainbow Dash felt shivers go up her spine, she did not want to find out what that was. “I’m Discord. So nice to meet you Discord,” Eh, who could it hurt in the end? Just roll with it, she thought to herself.
Celestia and Pinkie Pie smiled. Celestia hovered over a flower and gave it to what used to be Rainbow Dash. Then she hovered over a random street sign and gave it to what used to be Pinkie Pie. “This world needs more of myself, always has. Go make more Discords, and have them make chaos. If not bring them here for a Discord Punishment Party.”
Rainbow Dash flew backward down the street and to a crowd of ponies still talking about the pie incident while pinkie pie rolled like a bowling ball towards a different crowd of ponies eating up any pies they could find. Celestia smiled to herself as she sat on a table and ate the lunch she packed for herself off a chair. The chaos HAD to be from Discord and they were technically Discord now, so they could cause chaos. She wondered if he’d be proud or upset that she took advantage of this loophole.
Celestia smiled as she watched more and more ponies pretend to be Discord. Soon everypony was being their version of chaos. She watched as shop owners disorganized their shops haphazardly, as the Cakes baked fruit instead of sweets, ponies walked in reverse, ponies flew in reverse, some ponies just trotted in place never really going anywhere. Some of the pegasi were forming diamonds out of the clouds in the sky. Some of the clouds rained, some of the clouds snowed and some of the clouds were just clouds. Everypony started wearing clashing clothes that would make Rarity faint on the spot and Mayor Mare spoke only in reverse. Yes, this will do nicely she thought to herself.
She took one last bite of her sandwich and trotted backward, out to the middle of the square. There stood Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash guarding a lone pony. Lyra Heartstring. She took a deep breath and closed her mouth. Hidden behind a shrub was a box filled to the brim with sandwiches. She teleported one into her mouth as discreetly as possible. Then she pretended to cough it up when she began to speak. “I…. ack...OOO Sandwich!” She said eating the sandwich that just came out of her mouth.
Ponies mouths dropped in surprise, how? How did she do that? “Sorry.” She said “this version of Discord has a rare disease called ithrowupits allotist sandwiches. Very rare, tragic end, eventually I'll become a pickle. Can’t avoid it.” She said trying to sound sad, “but no worries I've come to terms with it.” “ACK!” She ended her sentence by coughing up and eating another sandwich. “Why did you bring her to me?”
“She is a non-believer, she is a pony and not Discord like the rest of us.” Pinkie said, approving nods came from the Discords behind her. “It’s time for a Discord Punishment Party!”
Celestia had to improvise; she wasn’t sure what that was. She drew a circle in the dirt and put Lyra in the center of it. She teleported a nearby bell to herself and all the other Discords surrounding her. She rang the bell and said “CHAOS!” She rang it again, then yelled “CHAOS!” Soon her fellow Discords joined her, they all rang bells and yelled out of sink. As soon as they joined her she stopped and yelled over the crowd. “This can stop at any time. All you have to do is agree to be Discord. You won’t get into any trouble. This discord will make sure of it.”
Lyra put her hooves up to her ears but it didn't help muffle the annoying sounds of out of sink yelling and ringing, “ALRIGHT ALRIGHT!” She yelled. “I’m Discord.”
Celestia smiled and silenced the bells, “let that be a lesson to all of you. Now go out and cause chaos!”
Lyra got up and moonwalked away from the group to cause some mayhem. She thought to herself that she better not get in trouble like Discord promised.
Celestia looked up at the sky as she saw how far the sun had moved, Twilight now moved it for her so she lost track of time easily. “OH NO! I’m late for tea.” She said teleporting straight to Fluttershy's
A poor unsuspecting Fluttershy flew around her cottage giving her furry friends some food. It is about 2:40, time for tea with Discord. Actually, way passed it, he was never this late and she was beginning to worry about him. She was taken by surprise when not the normal sound occurred but a teleportation sound. She turned around and almost dropped her plate filled with cucumber sandwiches with no crusts.
“Princess Celestia??” She squealed, what was she doing here? Had Fluttershy upset her in some way?
“No, it's Discord!" She, said as she pated Fluttershy on the shoulder.
Uhhhh…” Fluttershy trailed off. Was it him?
“No worries my dear Fluttershy. I've come for tea and a quick chat. I have something special planned today!” Celestia said waving her hooves through the air, trying to be overdramatic.
“Clearly," Fluttershy said, looking at Celestia was this her Discord pretending to be Celestia pretending to be Discord? Or was it actually Celestia pretending to be Discord?. She felt her head ache with confusion, and her anxiety grew as she put down the cucumber sandwiches on her table.
“I have no idea what that could mean. It's really me. I don't know why you would think otherwise" ‘Discord’ looked around the room to a pile of neatly stacked books and pushed it over with her hooves "ACK” she began as she coughed up and ate her last sandwich. “See chaotic," she said with a grin.
Fluttershy raised her eyebrow; that was pretty chaotic but something just felt off. She decided to test him out she would know best.“Have a sandwich and some tea," she said pointing to the seat as she watched discord fly backward to the chair that action was sort of like him. She watched him carefully noticing that he didn't touch the crusts, he always ate the crusts.
“Delicious Fluttershy, truly delicious," Celestia said honestly.
Fluttershy watched him take a sip of tea, since when did he sip tea? He usually ate the cup or drank the glass.
Celestia saw the suspicion in Fluttershy's eyes grow, she was catching on to the situation. Fluttershy knew the real Discord very well. "So how was your day? Tell me all about it!" She said hoping that it would take Fluttershy's mind off of the situation.
Fluttershy just agreed inside her head to play along. She would eventually find out what he was up to, she accepted her fate. “I was on my way to the market and there was this odd-looking stallion with a top hat and a cane. I think he was a dancer. He kept swirling around a pole saying 'singing in the rain' it was odd. I mean who just breaks out into song randomly like that and in public, also it wasn't raining. It didn't make much sense. Then at the market, I couldn't find anything because all the vendors' stalls were so disorginized. I was too shy to ask for help so I just left and went back home. On my way back home I found a randomly smashed pie, it was very odd.”
Celestia, I mean discord, looked over to the wall and saw it was a few minutes past three. It was showtime. “Yawwwwn that sounds so orderly. Gosh, order is the worst. Ima takes over Equestria because order sucks so much," she said as she poofed away from Fluttershy. Tea with her was actually pleasant and she could tell why Discord spent so much time with her. Maybe she would forgive Celestia later and also Discord.
Fluttershy looked at the blank spot that used to contain 'Discord', dumbfounded. "I think...I should go get Twilight." She said flying up above her chair and towards the door.