Was school, like, symptomatic of some bigger issue in society as a whole? Because it seemed to Moondog that for something that consisted mainly of telling people the right ways of how to do things, no one seemed to know the right way of how to do it. This school had to follow these laws, that one didn’t but had to follow those laws, this one was limited to students that had taken those classes, you had to write letters to get into all these, this one got public funding but this one didn’t, and that wasn’t even getting into the mess of technically-extrajudicial baloney that was the School of Friendship. It was all very confusing, and that was coming from a being who managed dreams.
Of course, Moondog’s “school” had been literally the entire first month of her life and consisted mainly of over a thousand years’ worth of knowledge getting near-continuously etched directly onto (the arcane equivalent of) her brain. Ponies might get weirded out by that.
And, of course, no matter which non-knowledge-etching school you went to, school meant tests, and tests meant nightmares. It was kind of like clockwork and it was what-
dreamer.getName(); return: "Gallus"
-Gallus was freaking out about now. In a manner of speaking. It explained the giant, cackling simulacrum of Twilight behind him.
“And don’t forget!” yelled Not-Twilight. “With every question you get wrong, the solutions get more basic while the solutions get more complicated! That is, the liquid solutions you’re swimming in get a higher pH number while the answers get harder! Hah! Science pun.”
Gallus fought to keep his head above the liquid that wasn’t quite water that he was swimming in. Waves beat him back and forth as giant test tubes surrounded him. All the while, he had a pencil in one hand and a paper in the other and was struggling to write something down.
liquid.drain();
A hole popped open below Gallus, and within seconds, all the liquid had drained away. Even Gallus himself was stone-dry. “Not again!” whined Not-Twilight. “That’s the fifth time this month! Hold still while I get the bleach.” And she was gone.
Gallus didn’t respond; he was too busy hastily scribbling gibberish down on his paper. His pencil was moving back and forth so quickly it was kicking up smoke. It wasn’t long before the predictable happened and the sheet caught fire. As it crumbled to ash in his claws, Gallus simply stared at it in disbelief. Then he started screaming his head off (not literally).
“Hi there!” said Moondog, flitting up next to him. “What’s up?”
“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!” screamed Gallus, flailing his arms.
“Aaaaaaaa aaaa aaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!” replied Moondog, doing the same.
“Aaaaaa aaaaaaaaaa aaaaa aaaaaaaa!” explained Gallus.
“Aaaaaaaaaaa?!” asked Moondog. “Aaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaa?!”
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” answered Gallus emphatically. “AAAAA-”
dream.setLanguage(PONISH.Plain); dreamer.allowLucidity(TRUE);
“-uldn’t make tea with a Bucksen burner!” Gallus wailed. “How am I supposed to understand arcane chemistry? And how does this relate at all to friendship?”
“Because in both friendship and chemistry, two very different things come together to make some new and different from either of them.”
“Hmph. By that logic, we should be baking cupcakes in classes besides Professor Pinkie’s.” Then Gallus blinked at Moondog. He looked around himself for a moment, then said, “Okay, I’m just taking a wild guess here: I’m dreaming and you’re Princess Luna trying out a new look.”
“One out of two ain’t bad!” Moondog drew herself up and bowed. “Name’s Moondog. I’m a-”
“You’re a dream construct and the reason Headmare Twilight was so distracted last week!” Gallus yelped, jumping to his feet. “I tried to talk with her one day, but she kept having these weird, whatstheword, tangents about how interesting you were. She actually wanted school to end so she could get back to studying you! Yona thought she might’ve been replaced by an unreformed changeling. Good thing we never got that net rigged up.”
“Pretty much, yeah. I noticed-”
“Wait, wait.” Gallus waved his paws at her. “Let me think for a sec.” He paced back and forth, rubbing at his beak. After a moment, he smirked and turned back to Moondog. “Okay, here’s the deal. We’ve got a test in arcane chemistry tomorrow. I’ve had a super busy week working on projects and haven’t been able to study-” He dropped his voice a few notches in volume. “-and also I really suck at it anyways so in order to give me a good dream, you need to dive into Professor Zecora’s head and get me the answers for the test, right?” Perhaps it was because they were part cat, but griffons could nail helpless cuteness with surprising ease if they wanted to.
Moondog stroked her chin, pretending to think. “Well, I could do that…”
“Yesssss!”
“…if you’re willing to be an accessory to a downright felonious invasion of mental privacy such that you’d be going to jail for multiple life sentences, complete with a state-sponsored necromancer there to be sure you served them all, and the only way to avoid it would be to set a precedent that would basically allow me free reign inside anyone’s head anytime I chose with no possible legal repercussions anytime anywhere ever.”
Gallus looked like he’d been told that hydrochloric acid was good for the body, so drink up and drink fast.
“Also it’s cheating.”
“Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuudgeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…” Gallus groaned. “I am so so, so dead…”
“Of course you’re not, you can’t die in a dream!” said Moondog, grinning. “But I can still help you. Just not like that.”
Gallus’s wings twitched. “Um… don’t help too hard, okay?” he said. “No offense to you, I’m sure you’re great, but the last time some ethereal magical being tried to help with school, I nearly got crushed to death. On purpose.”
--Error; InterruptedThoughtException e
dreamer.findMemories("crush", "studying", "magical bei
abortSearch();It was only with great restraint that Moondog stayed out of Gallus’s memories. They were personal and they weren’t related to this particular dream, so they didn’t matter, so she should stay out of them, no matter how much she wondered what the heck was going on. Instead, she smiled again and said, “Nah, it’s harmless. I’ll get one of your friends to help you.”
“How’re you gonna do that?” Gallus asked. His tail flicked.
“Dreamwalking.” Moondog wrapped her legs around Gallus’s body. “Hold on.”
“What was Torch doing with that squeegee?” asked a thoroughly befuddled Gallus. “And that buttermilk? Was that even buttermilk? I think it was buttermilk.”
“Cleaning the carriage,” said Moondog. “Obviously.” Her skills in extra-conscious dream transference could still use a little work.
“Huh. Is that what that’s called?”
“Look, these are dreams, don’t think too hard about it.”
“That’d be easier if I could get that image out of my head.”
Considering how easily she flitted into and out of peoples’ minds, Moondog wondered (and not for the first time) if she could erase peoples’ memories with any degree of precision. Of course, she was hardly about to start now. Or at any point outside of a strictly controlled testing environment.
dreamer.allowLucidity(TRUE);
“Maybe she can help.” Moondog pointed down the hall. At the very end, snipping the ribbon for her personal museum, was-
“Ocellus! Thank you.” Gallus took off down the hall, yelling, “Ocellus! Hey, Ocellus!”
Ocellus blinked and shoved Celestia aside so she could get a better look. “Gallus? What’re- How-”
Sliding to a stop in front of Ocellus, Gallus said, “Ocellus, I need you to help me cram for our arcane chemistry test tomorrow.”
“But…” Ocellus frowned. “Tomorrow’s our history of friendship test. Arcane chemistry isn’t until next week.”
Gallus blinked, then screamed at Moondog, “You see how bad my week’s been?!” He kneaded his forehead. “At least I get history. Chemistry is…”
“Yeah.” Ocellus giggled. “Remember that time we were going to roast marshmallows and you-”
“YOU ALL PROMISED YOU’D NEVER MENTION THAT AGAIN!”
--Error; InterruptedThoughtException e
dreamer.findMemories("ma
abortSearch();“How did you even get here?” asked Ocellus.
“Remember that Moondog person construct thing Headmare Twilight was studying last week?” Gallus pointed. “Say hi.”
Moondog smiled and waved. “Hi! Don’t mind me, I’m just the chauffeur.”
Ocellus squeaked in surprise. “Oh, wow!” She twitched, like she didn’t want to intrude on Moondog’s personal space out of politeness while at the same time wanted to intrude so bad. She took a few steps forward. “So you’re- Wait.” She glanced at Gallus. “How’d you get so lucky?”
“I… had bad dreams about not studying,” Gallus mumbled evasively, “and… she said she’d get help. Fixing dreams is her thing and all…”
Ocellus turned back to Moondog. “So you’re casually breaking the laws of nature and crossing dimensions just to help him study?”
“Not exa-”
“Coooooooooool…”
“…What the heck. Sure.”
Gallus coughed. “So, uh, can we get to the actual studying now? The thing we’re all here for?”
“Wait, don’t you wanna know about the dream…” Ocellus looked sideways at Moondog, blinking a lot. One of her ears twitched.
“Tulpa,” prompted Moondog.
Ocellus’s ears went up. “-about the tulpa that just popped up and pulled you into another dream?”
Gallus shrugged. “This is Ponyville. If I reacted to half the weird things I saw, I’d be late for class every single day.”
“Mmm. I guess.” Ocellus looked thoughtfully at Moondog.
“Ask Twilight for a copy of the report and get some closet space ready,” said Moondog.
dream.settle(MOOD.Cozy);
Moondog stoked the fire. “So, you’ve got your supplies right over there.” She gestured towards the coffee table. “Some books, Ocellus’s memories of her notes-” (Ocellus looked like she wasn’t sure whether she should be impressed or disturbed.) “-and some flash cards.”
Gallus eyed the last pile suspiciously. “They don’t actually flash, do they?”
“I limit myself to thirty literal punnings every twenty-four hours,” said Moondog seriously. “Which doesn’t sound like much, but I go through bazillions of dreams every night. I need to save them up for the good stuff.” Besides, it was far too obvious. “Just think of a question and answer while holding one, and they’ll both appear on it.”
“Like…” Ocellus picked one up and words traced themselves out. Her eyes grew wide. “I want these,” she said fiercely. “For real.”
“Talk to Twilight. She’ll be elated.” Moondog clapped her hooves together. “You two need anything more? If not, I need to get back to dream-sculpting.”
“No, I don’t think so,” said Gallus. “Seriously, Ocellus, we need to start, I am this close to freaking out.”
“Alright. Um…” Ocellus managed to pull herself away from the flash cards. “So what parts do you need help on?”
“Then I’ll be off, back in about an hour to check on you.” Moondog saluted. “Adios, amigos, and good luck.” She vanished in a wisp of smoke.
A few dreams and one so annihilated nightmare later, Moondog zipped back into Ocellus’s dream. Luckily, they were still going at it, but Gallus was angry about something. Moondog invisibly hovered behind him, not drawing attention to herself.
“What island was Neighpoleon exiled to after he was first deposed?” Ocellus asked from one of the cards.
Gallus twisted one of his headfeathers as he somehow managed to bite his beak. “Ehm… Saint Haylena?” he asked.
Ocellus sadly shook her head. “No, that’s the second island. The first one was Elbuck, off of Bitaly.”
“Great job on keeping him exiled, guys,” muttered Gallus, slouching over the table. “Just let him waltz right back into Prance whenever he frigging feels like it.”
Moondog slid into full visibility. “So how’s it going?” she asked.
Gallus muttered, “Lousy,” at the same time Ocellus said, “Okay.” They looked at each other, then Gallus said, “Okay, yeah, it’s going okay. I’m feeling a lot better about the test than I did an hour ago. But I can’t remember anything about Prance! It just won’t stay in my head! You wouldn’t know any… insta-knowledge spells, would you?”
“It’s probably best to not try to find out right now.”
“I think I’m just bored with… this place. I like a little change every now and then. And in school, I can just go to a different room to study, but here…” Gallus marched to one of the windows, wrenched it open, and climbed out of the room. At the same time, he climbed into the room through a window on the opposite wall. As he walked back to his chair, he made a Face at Moondog.
“Prance and the Neighpoleonic Wars are the last thing we’re covering, so he might just be burned out,” offered Ocellus. “Gallus, you’ll do fine.”
“But I wanna do better than fine! I-”
“You want me to change the entire world just so you can study better?” asked Moondog, grinning. “Well, why didn’t you just say so? That’s easy!”
Gallus gawked and Ocellus boggled. Then Gallus shrugged. “Sure, let’s do it.” He glanced up at the ceiling. “Can you do a tropical beach this time?”
“Gallus!” said Ocellus.
“C’mon, you know you want it!”
“I… might not…”
“Even better,” said Moondog. “Close your eyes.” Because a little dramatic indulgence never hurt. As soon as their eyes were tight shut, she set to work.
dream.settle(SPACE.Battlefield); [...] self.setAppearance(SPECIES.Earth_Pony); self.setAppearance(COAT_COLOR.Light_Tan); [...]
Once Moondog had put the finishing touches on his uniform, he said, “Now, open your eyes and watch out for the artillery.”
Gallus opened his eyes. “Whaddya mean, ‘watch out for-’ GREAT GOLDEN GROVER!” Gallus leaped into Ocellus’s arms and vice versa as a cannonball skipped off the grass beside them.
They were in the middle of a vast plain of farmland, a hill in the distance. Ponies in colorful armor were arranged in military lines on either side of them. Ponies and griffons alike were swarming the hill, along with several distinctive shapes that could only be cannons. “Welcome to Whinnyloo!” yelled Moondog, sweeping his baton over the entire plain. As he spoke, another volley of cannonballs soared overhead. “A battlefield of one of the last great coalitions between Equestria and Griffonstone, formed to stop the advance of Neighpoleon Ponyparte, Emperor of Prance! Which is me, by the way.” A neon sign flashing NEIGHPOLEON appeared in the air above him.
Once Gallus and Ocellus figured out how to get down, they took in the scene. Gallus examined the landscape and armies; Ocellus stared at Moondog like she was having a religious experience. Moondog adjusted his collar a little and looked away. When Gallus turned back, he looked Moondog up and down and said, “I thought he was short. I think you’re taller than Applejack!”
Moondog raised an eyebrow. “And you believe that Griffish propaganda? Pfah! Next to the impressive bodyguards I had, anybody would look small.” Two big, strong stallions emerged from behind him, both a full head taller, and without any dream skewing, slightly-taller-than-average Moondog became quite-small Moondog. “Except Celestia, obviously.”
“And then there were the differences in measurements!” chirped Ocellus. “The Prench foot was slightly longer than the Equestrian foot, so when the heights got translated-”
“Let the Emperor speak,” Moondog made one of the stallions rumble. Ocellus made a squeaking sound that was about 65% glee and 35% distress and hopped in place.
“Now,” boomed Moondog, “that army-” He pointed at the ridge. “-is led by none other than the Duke of Nestington, a griffon and one of the finest defensive commanders of all time! And that ridge, Mont-Selle-Jument, is perfect for one such as him. He hid the bulk of his forces on the other sides so that I could not see them and miscalculated his strength.” He poked upwards. “Take a look.”
Gallus took to the skies, Ocellus close behind him. After a few moments of looking, they swooped back down. “Okay, cool, that’s pretty neat,” Gallus said, “but what kind of idiot wouldn’t send out his pegasi to get a good look from the air? Like we just did?”
“Prance had very few pegasi — and unicorns, too,” interjected Ocellus. “They just weren’t available for scouting.” She looked at Moondog hopefully.
“Exactly right!” said Moondog. “In fact, one of the main reasons I was made Emperor in the first place was because…”
And so it went over ten minutes or so, with Ocellus and Moondog (mostly the former) explaining the ins and outs of the Neighpoleonic Wars that would probably be on the test as the Battle of Whinnyloo raged about them (Moondog kept the artillery volleys to a minimum). Every now and then, Ocellus would quiz Gallus on some random fact, and most of the time, he got it. “Most of the time” also appeared to be sufficient for him, since right answers elevated his spirits more than wrong answers lowered them.
“…and the period between Neighpoleon’s exiles was known as…?” asked Ocellus.
“Pfft. The Hundred Days,” snorted Gallus. “Even though it was actually a hundred and eleven days. Boom! Nailed it!” He pumped a fist in the air.
“You did,” said Ocellus. “I think you’ll do fine tomorrow. Or… what time is it? Is it today yet?”
“Don’t know, don’t care.” Gallus pounced on Moondog and wrapped him in a hug. “Thank you! Thankyouthankyouthankyou!”
self.setAppearance(DEFAULT);
“Mmhmm,” said Moondog. She draped her wings around Gallus and squeezed back, just a little. “But next time, just study, okay? I can’t keep doing stuff like this.”
Gallus released Moondog. “I would’ve if we hadn’t had that stupid class project all week!”
“It was a pretty stupid project,” mused Ocellus. “Where were we supposed to get all that wax?” She blinked and shook her head. “Anyway, um, Moondog, what happens now?”
Moondog shrugged. “Not much. Gallus goes back to his dream, I set this one back to what it was before, and-”
“Well, actually, do you think you could leave mine like this?” Ocellus sprang into the air and buzzed over several rows of soldiers. “I’m living history! This is amazing!”
“Sure, if you want it.”
“Yes! Thank you!” Ocellus buzzed into the distance, towards Mont-Selle-Jument.
“Uh, no dreams for me, thanks,” said Gallus. “I just want to sleep. With my luck, I’ll wake myself up by freaking out again.”
“No promises, but I’ll do my best,” said Moondog. “If all else fails, I’ll just give you a dream of sleeping.”
Gallus blinked. He tilted his head one way, then the other. He opened his beak, raised a claw declaratively, and froze. “Ow,” he mumbled, and rubbed his temples.
“I make dreams, not destroy them, sue me.”
The next night, Ocellus was drowning.
Moondog’s random patrol took her over Ponyville, and of the few nightmares she experienced, Ocellus’s was the fiercest. She was chained to a weight, sinking into the blackest depths of the ocean. Whenever she tried to shift into something that could breathe underwater, her magic slipped away from her and dispersed into the dark.
Moondog wasn’t sure yet what this sort of nightmare meant, but at least fixing it was easy. Let the weight settle on the seabed (for orientation), break the chains (for freedom), give Ocellus gills (for safety), let her see in the dark (for navigation). She could’ve just given Ocellus her changeling powers back, but that was too typical. And Ocellus seemed to be having fun learning to swim the pony way.
Normally, that would’ve been that, but right before Moondog left, she remembered: what about Gallus? Had his dream study hour actually worked, giving her another tool for making good dreams? She hadn’t even remembered when taking a look at his dreams (although his lack of nightmares was so complete she wasn’t that worried). Ocellus would know. Moondog knew she really shouldn’t hang about, but sifting through Gallus’s memories would be so impersonal (and of questionable morality at best)…
whatTheHeck(); dreamer.allowLucidity(TRUE);
“Hi!” said Moondog, walking up to Ocellus on the seabed and glowing softly. “You doing alright?”
Ocellus twisted around in the water at the sound and the light. Her eyes widened. “Moondog! Hi!” she bubbled. She attempted to settle on the ground, but her buoyancy kept pushing her back up. “What’re you doing here?”
“Not letting you drown, for starters.” Moondog shrugged. “Really, that’s it. You had a nightmare that needed trouncing and I was available.” A pause. She bit her lip. “And…” She got right up in Ocellus’s face. “How’d Gallus do on his test?” she asked breathlessly.
“We didn’t get it back yet, but he feels like he did great.” Ocellus grabbed at some seaweed, to no avail. “And he’s not usually that confident, so I think he’s right.”
A little bit of anxiety loosened itself in Moondog’s chest. “Cool. Cool. Thanks.” She nodded. “That’s all I need, so-”
“Wait!” Ocellus gave up on trying to walk and simply swam. “Seeing Whinnyloo last night was really cool, although I don’t think the tap-dancing pikemares I saw after you left were historically accurate.”
“If Mom or I don’t keep a dream in line, it tends to wander,” said Moondog. “You were lucky it stayed on Whinnyloo.”
“But if you can do Whinnyloo, you can do other places, too!” said Ocellus eagerly. “Like, um…” She looked around and blurted, “Seaquestria! Twilight’s visit to Seaquestria during the Storm Invasion!”
Moondog tilted her head. “That, specifically? Why?”
“Because, um…” Ocellus’s elytra opened and closed twice. “I heard that later in the semester, we’re… studying the Invasion and I wanted to get a head start on it.” She said it tentatively, as if she were asking a question to see if Moondog would buy it.
buy(it); return: *SO* FALSE
“You just wanna see Twilight and the Elements visit Seaquestria, don’t you?”
“It’s the first pony-hippogriff contact in ages!” squealed Ocellus. “Of course I do! Why wouldn’t I?”
“Did Twilight ever tell you how she got caught stealing a foreign culture’s national treasure?”
“Yeah. So? And could you stay here to make sure it’s accurate? Pleeeaaase?”
Ocellus and Applejack would probably get along well, Moondog suspected. They had the same stubborn focus. Moondog ran a hoof through her mane and said, “Okay, look. I can’t stay around long. I’ve got, like, the whole country to watch over.”
“But…?” Ocellus said, smiling.
“But…” Moondog took the underwater equivalent of a breath. “I guess I can do this once.” And it wasn’t that bad of an idea, to be honest. Just disruptive. Most ponies would love something like this. They just didn’t ask. “And I can’t stay around that long.”
“That’s fine!” said Ocellus. “I won’t need long!”
But from that glint in her eyes as the ocean froze into the former ruins of Mt. Aeris, Moondog suspected she wouldn’t stop here.
The next next night, whaddya know, Ocellus was having nightmares again. Moondog poked her nose into Ocellus’s dream, and… whoa.
“Phantasmagorical” didn’t begin to describe it. Even without looking too deeply, bricks flew on gelatin wings through a brown sky above a Ponyville where the pink ground was melting into the buildings (which were made out of tar) as various Everfree monsters puttered around doing bloodstained errands while wearing badly-made pony masks. And standing in the middle of the circular town square, trying not to freak out as a bugbear wearing a Caramel mask licked her, was Ocellus.
bugbear = NULL; dream.add(new SmallPlateau());
The bugbear vanished in a puff of plaid smoke and a stone shelf rose out of the ground beneath Ocellus to give her something solid to stand on. As she let out a sigh of relief, Moondog landed on the air next to her. “Mom would just love picking apart the symbolism in this,” said Moondog. (She really would. Mom adored the very idea of symbolism and could wax poetic about it for hours on end. Apparently, she was killer in several Canterlot book clubs.) She looked at Ocellus and raised an eyebrow meaningfully.
“Oh, there’s no symbolism,” said Ocellus cheerfully. “I just heard that eating cheese too close to bedtime will give you bad dreams, so I ate a whole wheel. And it worked! Did you know that Salvannor Dalí ate Camembuck cheese to get inspiration from his nightmares?”
Moondog stared around them. “This happened from eating cheese?”
“Apparently!”
fileQuestion("Why does cheese cause nightmares?");
fileQuestion("No, seriously, WHY?");“I was hoping you’d stop by,” Ocellus continued, “since we’re studying King Sombra’s time as ruler of the Crystal Empire. Maybe you could-”
“Seriously?” said Moondog. “You want to go from this…” She spread her wings wide. “…to King Sombra’s rule?” She facehooved. “I make good dreams, not worse nightmares!”
“But I already know it turned out alright, so it’s not bad, just sad!” protested Ocellus. “And I just want to see what happened when Celestia and Luna banished him!”
Moondog blinked. “You know I… have stuff to do, right? That I’m responsible for Equestria’s dreams? I can’t keep coming around like this!”
“Well… yeah…” said Ocellus. Her ears drooped a tiny bit before springing back up. “But you can do it tonight, right? Just this once?”
Sighing, Moondog ripped the linoleum from the ground, exposing the snow of the Frozen North beneath. “Fine. Just this once,” she said. “Again,” she added under her breath.
The next next next night…
notify(self.getSpellMessages(), sm); readSpellMessage(sm);
Moondog, I know you have a lot on your plate, but do you think you could see me again? I'm only asking for a little bit of time! An hour would be fine. Ocellus P.S. Wow! This spell even corrects my spelling!
SpellMessage oRsp = new SpellMessage(); oRsp.compose();
Ocellus, I'm sorry, really, but I just don't have the time. No, not even for an hour. I have a lot of dreams to manage and can't justify taking time off every night to help somebody study for school, especially not when they're already a straight-A student. Look at yourself: you're already teaching yourself dream magic. From scratch. In less than a day. Seriously, that's incredible. What makes you think you need my help? I helped you the last two nights because I thought it’d be a one-time thing. Or two-time thing, whatever. Moondog P.S. Of course it does. You're writing stuff in a way so that your knowledge doesn't get screened out by junk in your conscious mind.
oRsp.send(ocellus); [...] notify(self.getSpellMessages(), sm); readSpellMessage(sm);
Moondog, Please? I know I don't need any help, but it'll be so much fun! Ocellus P.S. What do you mean with that last part?
SpellMessage oRsp = new SpellMessage(); oRsp.compose();
Ocellus, See this map? That's the area I have to protect. All of it. All night. That's not an exaggeration. Please just let me do my job. Moondog P.S. Write to Mom about it. She can explain it better than me, she'd love to get letters from her subjects, and she'd be over the moon (ha ha) to hear you're teaching yourself dream magic. She might even be more interested in helping you "study" that way.
oRsp.attach(equestria.getMap()); oRsp.send(ocellus); [...] notify(self.getSpellMessages(), sm); sm.getSender(); return: "Ocellus" sigh(); readSpellMessage(sm);
Could you at least tell me how you did the thing with the map?
sm.shred(); --Error; JerkMoveException e [...] notify(self.getSpellMessages(), sm); sm.getSender(); return: "Ocellus" sm.shred(); --Error; JerkMoveException e
The next next next next night…
notify(self.getSpellMessages(), sm); sm.getSender(); return: "Twilight Sparkle" readSpellMessage(sm);
“I got your message,” Moondog said as she jumped into Twilight’s dream. “Is this about Ocellus?”
Twilight’s thought balloon popped, spraying rainbow highlighters everywhere. “Yes! How’d you know?”
Moondog sighed. “About a week ago, I helped Gallus study for a test — don’t look at me like that, I stayed out of anyone’s head! — and Ocellus helped with the helping. But my helping helped a little too much, and now she wants me to help her study, even though by helping her, I can’t help other people who need help with their dreams, and she doesn’t need helping anyway. She’s even taught herself dream magic to send messages and keep asking me about it! Which, okay, hooray for her, that’s crazy impressive, but how can someone like me manage to get junk mail?”
“Huh,” said Twilight. “So that’s what all those library visits were about. I’ll- Ocellus is teaching herself dream magic?! From books based on pony teaching methods? Why didn’t you say anything before? This is great! Not only is that quite a skill at her age, it’s definitive proof that those techniques are species-neutral!”
“Mom coulda told you that,” muttered Moondog, and she braced herself.
gushing.tolerate(40, TIME.Seconds);
Ripping open a book and leafing through it was so second-nature to Twilight that one had poofed into existence before her for just that purpose without her even trying. “Nimitybelle actually thought that was the case, you know,” she said casually. “That ponies weren’t anything special when it came to that sort of magic, but a sophont’s connection to the dream realm — she called it the astral plane, did you know that? — was all that mattered. That made her a bit of a pariah, if you can believe that.” Twilight put on an impeccable imitation of a high-society snoot she couldn’t have managed in the real world. “Ponies, not the top of the magical food chain? Oh! How prepossssssterous!” She snorted. “Anyway, since lucid dreaming is well-documented in griffons, dragons have stories about it, I’d bet money zebras have writing about it somewhere in the Library of Rakotiru- Because of all that, it’s become accepted that any species that dreams can use dream magic, but we were wondering if learning them in the same way-”
“OI!” Moondog clapped her hooves together with the sound of a cannon blast. “This about Ocellus!”
“But speculation is so fun!” Twilight still set the book down carefully. “Anyway, you were saying?”
“So Ocellus wants me to help her study,” continued Moondog, “and here’s the thing. If I didn’t need to help ponies with their dreams, I’d be just fine with hanging out with her. She’s a sweet kid and I hate to let her down, but I can’t give her the time she wants. Especially since she doesn’t really need it.”
Twilight nodded slowly. “Yeah. I can see that. What did you help Gallus with?”
“History. Most of the teaching was all her, but Gallus was having trouble remembering stuff about the Neighpoleonic Wars, so I just turned into Neighpoleon and dropped them into Whinnyloo to give him the relevant facts amid artillery fire.”
“It must’ve worked, since Gallus almost aced that test. So…” Twilight clicked her tongue. “Ocellus had read parts of that report Starlight, Sunburst, and I wrote on you, especially the part about illusions, and reasoned that you could make an imitation of just about any historical event. So… she kinda wants you to sub and teach history for a day.”
“Hoo boy.” Moondog ruffled her mane. “She said something about me not working during the day, right?”
“Yep.”
“I mean, it’s not like third-shifters could use my help or anything while Mom’s asleep…”
“Okay, after all the studying I did of you, I know that’s just an excuse.”
“Well-!” protested Moondog, flaring her wings. “That was-! We needed to-! So I-”
self.setHonesty(100.0);
“-I just don’t like going outside, okay?”
Twilight smirked. “Nerd.”
“If the thing I’m nerding about is dream magic, then yeah! Totally! I’m willing to go into the real world if it’s for science or- a holiday or something, but I really don’t like the feel of it. I mean…” Moondog tugged at her mane and looked away. “I can if you want, but-”
“No,” Twilight said quickly. “I’m not going to make you do anything. I’ll just tell Ocellus you’re not available.” She tapped her chin thoughtfully. “Although it’d be pretty neat if you did-”
“Not right now,” snapped Moondog. “Maybe it’ll be my birthday gift to you.”
“Or to Ocellus. Do you want me to talk to her about sending you messages?”
“No, I’ll take care of it. Don’t worry, I’ll be gentle.”
Moondog and Ocellus sat side by side next to a river as Ocellus rambled on about… something. “…and then Sombra, he was all, ‘She shouldn’t have been let in!’ And Tempest said, ‘It wasn’t her fault!’ And she had the lasagna, so it wasn’t like…” To Moondog’s (somewhat surprising) disappointment, Ocellus wasn’t that great at achieving lucidity on her own — definitely not as good as Meadow — so she didn’t recognize their situation yet. It gave Moondog a few extra moments to get her thoughts together.
self.psychUp(); dreamer.allowLucidity(TRUE);
“Hey,” said Moondog.
“…all the other pasta-” Ocellus stopped and looked at Moondog with big eyes. From shock or joy, it was hard to tell. She opened her mouth.
“I heard from Twilight. I’m sorry I didn’t respond to your latest messages, but-”
“I’m sorry I sent you so many!” said Ocellus quickly. She tried to look away while also looking Moondog in the eyes (and managed an admirable job of it). “When you didn’t respond last night, I talked to Twilight about you yesterday, but then Silverstream pointed out that if you weren’t responding, you probably didn’t want to talk, and… I can… see why.” Her ears twitched. “Sorry.”
At least step one was going nicely. “Sorry for shutting you out,” said Moondog. “You didn’t deserve the silent treatment, but after getting so many messages from you, I just didn’t know what to do. So congratulations on being the first person in history to send dream junk mail. No, seriously, I really am kind of impressed. How’d you learn it so fast?”
In spite of the situation, Ocellus giggled. “I don’t know, it just sort of falls into place. I’m having trouble staying lucid, though, or else you’d’ve gotten even more letters.”
“Are you trying to be lucid? Don’t try. Just let it slip.”
“I’m letting it slip, but my mind’s sticky and won’t slip. Maybe that’s why I remember things so well.” Ocellus buzzed her wings once. “S-so, um, even if you can’t show me history every night, Twilight told you about subbing, right? I just thought- I know her report said that you didn’t like being in the real world, but maybe, just this once…” She made hopeful puppy-dog eyes so sweet it was amazing she didn’t turn into a puppy.
Moondog sighed. Stupid monobodied existence, having to let down a kid like this. She lightly poked the river, sending out a perfectly ordinary ring of ripples. “It’s more than just… not liking being outside. You know how, in the new and improved Hive, everyone loves you?”
Ocellus smiled dreamily and nodded. “Yeah…”
“You know how, back in the Hive before Thorax’s coup, no one gave two craps about you?”
Ocellus shuddered. “Yeah.”
“Now, which Hive do you think you belong in? The new one, where you can find food in every corner? Or the old one, where it got ripped away from you if you weren’t careful? Because that’s what dreams and reality are like for me. The outside world is just so…” Moondog grimaced. “…tough and draining. Like acid sandpaper.”
“Oh. Ouch.” Ocellus cringed. “I’m sorry. I just-” Her elytra sprang open as her voice sped up. “You coming out here would’ve been so cool! I was imagining the land around Whinnyloo all wrong and if you did that with other times, then…” She reddened a tiny bit and looked down. Her voice dropped to nearly a whisper. “But I… Sorry for forgetting your royal duties.”
“To be honest, I don’t blame you.” Moondog nudged Ocellus with a wing. “When you’ve got some of Equestria’s greatest heroes as your teachers and guidance counselor, plus a princess for a headmare, it can be easy for you to forget how freaking weird it is. And I kinda started it, anyway.”
Ocellus kept staring at the river. “Yeah… but… Yeah.”
notify(self.getThoughts(), new Idea());
“So tell you what,” Moondog said, scratching Ocellus’s head. “Being outside’s not so bad that I won’t say ‘never’. If you’re on track to graduating summa cum laude when you begin your last year, I’ll put some serious thought into subbing, okay?”
“But…” Ocellus looked up at Moondog, frowning. “I’m already at the top of the class.”
Moondog smirked. “Ah, but can you stay there?”
Ocellus blinked. “Yes.”
“…For years?”
Ocellus’s voice was so blunt it could’ve been used as a hammer. “Yes.”
You had to do something when faced with confidence like that, and Moondog had a pretty good idea of what. “If you’re so sure, then this won’t distract you.” She sat down and spread her wings. “I’m yours for half an hour. Whaddya want?”
“Wait, really?” Ocellus beamed with surprise and buzzed into the air. “You mean it?” she asked, muzzle-to-muzzle with Moondog.
“Absotively. I can spare half an hour for one night. Not an hour every night. One night.”
“Wow! Then… Um…” Ocellus frowned and scratched her chin as the ground rose to meet her. “I wanna see how Twilight met her friends and first defeated Nightmare Moon,” she said eventually, and smiled hopefully up at Moondog.
“That? Really?” Moondog tilted her head. “You know that by heart, artery, and capillary.”
“Yeah, but I wanna see it.” Ocellus was nearly bouncing on her hooves.
“Well, it’s your time.”
dream.setStyle(SCENE);
scene.getByKeyword("nightmare moon", "elements of harmony");
scene.start();The river unfolded apart right down the middle and the ground rushed away beneath Moondog and Ocellus. In its place sprang up a spacious neighborhood in Canterlot, where a certain lavender unicorn was reading next to a lake. “‘...and harmony has been maintained in Equestria for generations since.’ Hmm... Elements of Harmony. I know I've heard of those before... but where?”
“Twilight looks really weird without wings,” Ocellus said, almost disappointedly. Then: “Eeeeeeeeee! That’s Twilight before she became a princess! Eeeeeeeeee!” She ran up to Twilight and examined where her wings should’ve been. “She’s so small. This is accurate, right?”
As Moondog slowed down playback to give Ocellus more time to look and fought the urge to have an accordion-playing otter climb out of the lake, she said, “Pretty close. It’s made from her memories, so…” She shrugged.
When Twilight ran off to her tower to do research, Ocellus took the opportunity to look around. After a few seconds, her jaw dropped. “Twilight lived in Hayward Hills when she still lived in Canterlot?” she gasped. “Oh, gosh! That’s one of the most upscale neighborhoods in- in all of Equestria!”
“Yeah, being Princess Celestia’s pupil has its-”
--Error; InterruptedThoughtException eThe scene froze as Moondog snapped to look at Ocellus. “-you know about Hayward Hills?”
“I read,” Ocellus said, shrugging. “A lot.”
At least dreams had the excuse of being built of non-sequiturs. “Like what, A Stupidly Specific Guide to Certain Canterlot Neighborhoods of Particular Wealth?”
“No, that one was checked out. I read Fodock’s Canterlot the first week I started school. I wanted to see Canterlot and that book was the next best thing.”
Moondog eyed Ocellus like she was going to spring another booby question, then resumed the scene. Twilight ran up the stairs to her house and barged in, asking for-
“Were all those bookshelves added after Twilight moved in,” asked Ocellus, “or did she move in because they were already there?”
--Error; InterruptedThoughtException e
self.findMemories("twilight", "bookshelves", "canterlot house");“Yes,” said Moondog. “Like a third of them were already in and Twilight added the rest. With her own money, might I add.” She glanced down at Ocellus. “You know, if you keep asking questions like that, you’re gonna use up your half-hour before the Summer Sun Celebration starts.”
Ocellus flinched. “Alright. I’ll try to stay quiet.”
“How old is Spike?”
“Can a normal pony or changeling take a ride in a sky chariot, or is that just royalty?”
“Did Celestia pick the ponies in charge of the Celebration deliberately?”
“Where did all the Apples stay during the reunion?”
“How come Pinkie lives above Sugarcube Corner and the Cakes don’t?”
“Where did Nightmare Moon trap Celestia?”
“If there’s a reference guide to the Elements, how come…”