It felt like a rare occasion to see anything other than clear skies above Canterlot. The local weather team had arranged for an overcast sky, which at this point Guise assumed was just an effort to make the city and its people seem at least a little humble; they already seemed like they were full of themselves, so basking in the splendor of Princess Celestia's sun all day everyday would have made them look pretty self-important. But it was more than likely just in preparation for some rain later in the day. That's usually how it went with these ponies and their manually adjusted weather. Must have been nice to just pick and choose the weather whenever it suited them...
Guise took a sip of his coffee, a quiet sigh escaping through his nostrils. He rubbed his temple lightly with a slight groan. He'd had a bit of a headache since he woke up that morning. He and Sweetmint had been drinking the night before, and she explained that one of the downsides of drowning your problems in alcohol was hangovers. She teased him a bit when he rolled out of bed, insisting that they didn't even drink enough to warrant a hangover and accusing him of being a "lightweight." He didn't fully understand what she meant by that, but he felt as though he should be insulted regardless.
He glanced across the street. From his vantage point at the café where he was taking his break, he could see Sweetmint through the windows of Rocky's Road. She was taking off her apron and discarding her hairnet, ready to take her own break.
Guise also couldn't help but notice that Tapioca seemed to be nattering on about something with an oblivious smile on her face, following Sweetmint all the way to the door until the green mare shut the door in her face to escape her inane chatter. But Tapioca happened to look across to the café, her eyes meeting Guise's. She gave him one of her trademark sultry stares, waving demurely at him. Guise thought that odd considering what he'd said to her the day prior. He'd made it abundantly clear that he wanted nothing to do with her, but apparently nothing could break through the barrier of stupid between her ears and her brain.
Sweetmint gave Guise a passing wave as she briefly stepped inside the café to get a coffee, promptly returning to sit with him, though didn't say anything right away. She didn't even look him in the eye. Guise noticed a perturbed look on her face. She seemed to be pondering something.
"What's up?" he asked.
She took a sip of coffee and finally looked across at him. "Tapioca's been acting weird today."
"What exactly constitutes 'weird' for her?" Guise asked derisively.
"Well, it's not like she hasn't been her usual brainless self, but for some reason she won't shut up today. She's been yammering in my ear since she showed up to work and it's starting to grind my gears."
"How is this really that much different than any other day? Just tell her to shut up and leave you alone."
"Normally I would whenever there are no customers around, but it's not the same. She's constantly been bringing up our relationship, trying to pepper it into the conversation wherever she can."
"And that's surprising to you?"
"Look, I'm not gonna act like I'm blind here. I know she has a thing for you, but she flirts with every good looking guy she crosses paths with." Sweetmint swirled her coffee around in her cup, staring into it for a moment in thought before looking back at Guise. "This isn't something I've ever really considered before, but... Do you think I'm insecure?"
Guise quirked an eyebrow. "Insecure? About what?"
"About us. I mean, I've seen the way you look at her when she's talking to you, and it's the same way I look at her, so I know I should have no reason to worry. But every time she tries to hit on you, I start feeling like I have the same look on my face that Chips does."
Guise had to force back a mocking smirk. "You're jealous?"
Sweetmint rolled her eyes, a blush quickly filling her cheeks. "Shut up, I'm not jealous." She let out a sigh, taking a small sip of coffee. "But I do get irrationally upset when I see her flirting with you. It's probably more so about how blatant she is about it. It's pretty disrespectful to both of us."
"So even when I'm not around, she's still talking about me? Geez, that girl's got it just as bad as Chips does."
"But that brings me to what's so weird about today. It's not just you she's talking about, it's us." Sweetmint leaned against the table, knitting her brow in vexation. "She's been acting all sympathetic, like she thinks we're having issues."
Guise paused in the middle of taking a sip of coffee. Now he was starting to understand what this was about.
Sweetmint looked him in the eye, curious, but agitated. "She seems to be under the impression that we've been fighting, saying that we were here at the café getting into a pretty heated argument. Now, I know we got a little tipsy last night, but I'm pretty sure we didn't drink nearly enough to forget anything, especially something that supposedly happened when we were sober."
Guise had a feeling something like this was going to happen. He'd made the decision yesterday that he was going to stop being passive-aggressive and treat anypony who wasn't Sweetmint with the respect they deserved—which is to say, none—but there was a reason he'd originally chosen to keep his personality subdued. Acting like a total jerk all the time was likely to cause problems, and that was already taking effect apparently.
But, this was Tapioca they were talking about here. It'd be pretty easy to explain that away. So, to that end, he nodded. "Okay, I think I see where this is coming from."
"Enlighten me," Sweetmint requested, listening intently.
"I finally had enough of her shit yesterday and told her where she could shove it. I guess she doesn't take rejection very well and is trying to get back at me by making up garbage about us to get us to argue."
Sweetmint practically laughed at the explanation. "That's it? Sheesh, I know she's not the brightest bulb in the box, but surely even she could come up with something more believable than that. It is a little weird though. I never expected her to be so petty. I know she's pretty flirtatious, but you'd think she'd just let that stuff roll off her back. Getting rejected by you must've cut her pretty deep." She downed the rest of her coffee and stood up. "Well, hopefully this means she'll stop flirting with you at least. Seriously, it's still pretty shitty of her to so blatantly flirt with my boyfriend when I'm right there. When is she gonna get a clue? Anyway, guess I'll head back. See you when you get off work, Crimson." She gave Guise a quick kiss before heading back to work.
"Later."
Guise watched her saunter back across the street. The moment she stepped back inside, Tapioca walked up to her and started talking again. He wasn't sure what effect his lie would end up having. Tapioca had been telling the truth—at least as far she knew—but Guise couldn't admit that. Of course, Tapioca had this coming. If she was going to act like a clueless bimbo and make moves on somepony who clearly had no interest, then she deserved to be rejected the way he'd done to her. If she were smart enough to recognize his less-than-subtle signals, then this wouldn't be happening.
***** ***** *****
Guise stretched his back to work out the kinks induced from leaning over a sink all day. Like most days, his false mane and coat were damp with a mixture of dishwater and sweat, but he unfortunately didn't have the luxury of the shining sun to help him dry off today. In fact, as he left The Soup Spoon, he could have sworn he felt a drop of rain hit him. Hopefully Sweetmint could finish up in a timely manner today so they could get home before it started to rain.
With that in mind, he hurried across the street to Rocky's Road. Judging by what he could see through the windows, there appeared to be a few customers left, so it looked like it was going to be a little longer before they closed. He figured he may as well have a bowl of Sweetmint's ice cream while he waited.
But the moment he opened the door, Sweetmint set her sights on him. She stepped out from behind the counter and towards him. "Good, finally. Crimson, please tell her that we're good and she can stop obsessing," she commanded, pointing at Tapioca.
Guise looked at Tapioca. She was wearing a rather unfamiliar look of frustration, but, of course, he knew why.
"I know I saw you two arguing yesterday, but Minty keeps saying it never happened. Tell her, Crimsy," Tapioca pleaded.
Guise grimaced at the situation he'd stumbled into. He didn't really want to be caught in the crossfire like this, but he was in it now. He was obviously going to side with Sweetmint; he couldn't just say that it was Chamella he'd been speaking to, that would be way too suspicious. What Tapioca thought about what she saw made no difference to him anyway. He'd shown her enough sympathy yesterday, and he was done putting up with her nonsense.
"You're wrong," he told her plainly.
Tapioca's mouth hung open in shock. "Huh? B-But, I saw—"
Guise held up his hoof to stop her. "Look, I did stop at the café for a coffee yesterday before going home, but Mint wasn't there. I don't know who you thought you saw, but it wasn't her."
Tapioca's ears drooped, clearly struggling to understand the situation as she thought she saw it. Guise assumed she must be very confused about all this, but that's what she gets for shoving her nose in their business.
"There, you see? You're seeing things," Sweetmint said with a great deal of irritation in her voice. "Now, stop acting like you care about our relationship, shut your gob, and get back to work."
Sweetmint returned to her station behind the counter, Guise accompanying her, but in front. He requested a bowl of ice cream, but as Sweetmint was preparing it, he happened to glance over his shoulder. Tapioca was just standing there, staring at him with a look of uncertainty and confusion. Guise chose to ignore her, taking his dairy treat to a table to eat it.
However, he barely had a chance to take one spoonful before the cream colored mare appeared again in his peripheral vision. Tapioca had wandered over to his table, eventually sitting down across from him.
Guise scowled across the table. "What?"
"I... I don't understand," she said quietly.
The changeling groaned internally. It was pretty obvious that she wasn't going to drop the subject until she could make sense of it, so he may as well do something about it. "Listen, even if Mint and me did have an argument, does that automatically mean our relationship is in trouble? Couples argue, they make up, get over it."
"But why are you pretending it didn't happen? I totally saw it, and you were really upset and stuff."
"Does that mean it's any of your business? What, are you into couples counseling now or something?"
"I just don't see any reason for her to get mad at you. You're such a sweet guy, Crimsy. I would never get mad at you like that."
Guise could practically feel Sweetmint's glare pointing in their direction. Given what she'd said earlier, he assumed Sweetmint had little tolerance for such talk right now.
"You told me yesterday that you two have a lot in common, but I don't see it," Tapioca commented. "She's all mean and grouchy. How can you like somepony like that?"
"Excuse me?" Sweetmint stomped out from behind the counter again, glaring daggers at Tapioca. "Are you going to say that it's impossible to like somepony like me?"
Tapioca shrunk back a little, but scoffed. "You could be a little nicer sometimes. I always try to be super friendly, but you just get mad and say mean stuff."
"Because you're an idiot!"
Tapioca flinched at the insult.
"Have I ever once suggested that I wanted to just sit and chat with you? How am I supposed to be all chummy with somepony like you?! There's more air in your head than there is brain! The only reason you even have a job here is because you walk around shaking your ass everywhere! You take days off and come in late whenever it suits you with no repercussions, and when you do decide to come into work, you barely do anything other than spout nonsensical comments and flirt with customers! And you get paid more than me!"
Guise sat quietly with his mouth slightly agape as Sweetmint laid into Tapioca. Had this happened a day ago, he might have stepped in to try and calm her down, especially since there were customers present who were staring at them. But now that Guise had resolved to stop caring about anypony who didn't matter to him, he actually wanted to see this happen. So he just sat there and watched this unfold.
"But you don't even have to think, do you?" Sweetmint continued, her tirade not letting up. "No, you just have everything you want served to you on a silver platter while I have to work ten times harder just to get by in life! And to make matters even worse, you have the audacity to try and make moves on my boyfriend right in front of me! You expect me to be nice to you after that?!"
Tapioca stood up defensively, but her expression didn't seem too steadfast under Sweetmint's ever-building rage. "I-I was just being playful."
"Bullshit! If you were just being playful, you should have backed off when it became obvious that neither of us were happy about it! And now you're pissy about being shot down by him so you're trying to fabricate drama to start something! Stop trying to butt into our love lives so you can try and weasel your way between us! Why would he even be interested in somepony like you?! Nopony wants to be with somepony as stupid as you!"
Tapioca's lip began to tremble, her eyes looking to be on the verge of tears. However, she knit her brow regardless. Despite how much she was being verbally torn apart, she still appeared to have some will to fight back. "At least I would treat him better than you! Crimson shouldn't have to put up with your dumb anger issues. A sweet guy like him deserves a girl who's just as nice, not some angry... bitch!"
Sweetmint's pupils narrowed like a feral beast. That last insult was what pushed her over the edge. Without warning, Sweetmint violently shoved Tapioca away, causing the other mare to stagger backward. She collided with a chair and tumbled backward onto the floor. The customers present gasped in shock, but appeared to be too stunned to move. Frosted Chips, having been silently observing the entire exchange, suddenly rushed over to Tapioca's side, though stopped short as the fallen mare propped herself up.
Tapioca stared up at her attacker, a hurt and fearful look in her eyes. Sweetmint was the exact opposite; she glared icily down at Tapioca, no remorse whatsoever on her face.
"You don't know anything about us or our relationship," Sweetmint growled furiously. "You think I don't care about him? I love Crimson more than anypony I've ever been with, and I don't want you assuming that I don't treat him with the respect he deserves."
Guise's eyes went wide. Did he hear what he thought he'd heard? Had she even realized what she'd said?
"Now get this through your thick skull: I don't ever want you to say another word to him, got it? Take a hint," Sweetmint ordered, her voice oozing with venom. And that was the last word before she went back to work.
Tapioca stood back up, albeit shakily, but didn't say anything. She looked Guise in the eye one more time, looking as though she expected him to say something in her defense.
Admittedly, this may have gotten a little out of hoof. But given the mood Sweetmint was currently in and despite wanting to inquire about what she'd said, Guise decided it was in his best interest not to say anything that might set her off again.
Seeing that Guise wasn't going to try and defend her, Tapioca hurried off to the back room for a little privacy. The customers present took the opportunity to discreetly get up and leave, not even finishing their ice creams. Chips just stared at the door to the back room, clearly wanting to go console Tapioca, but not having enough nerve to actually do it.
Guise turned to Sweetmint. Her face was beet red, the rage still boiling in her expression. She was fixing herself a bowl of ice cream, likely to help cool her head a little. Guise half-expected the dessert to melt just by being in such close proximity to her.
This had been a very unexpected turn of events. All things considered, it may have been better if that hadn't happened, but because of this, Guise discovered something that piqued his interest. He just needed some clarification.
Guise stood up and approached the counter. "Mint, you okay?"
"Go home, Crimson," she told him, her voice still as icy as it was when she was yelling at Tapioca. "I know I usually like having you around to help me calm down, but I don't really want you here for this right now, okay? I think I need to be alone for a while. We can talk we I get home."
Guise frowned. He wanted a more definitive answer, but he wasn't likely to get Sweetmint to open up about anything right now. So, he just did as she requested and left. Hopefully, she'd be able to keep her emotions in check well enough as they closed up to not cause anymore harm. He wasn't entirely sure why he cared whether or not she had hurt Tapioca, but a part of him felt like she may have gone a tad overboard this time.
***** ***** *****
By the time Guise had gotten back to the apartment, rain had started to fall. It was only a light drizzle for now, but based on how quickly it had come on from the time since he'd left Rocky's, it was likely only going to get heavier. Guise only had to make a brief trip to the bathroom to dry off his mane, but it was easier to momentarily shift back to his changeling form to wipe off the rest of his body, then back to his disguise with a relatively dry coat of fur.
Guise wandered back to the kitchen, throwing a bowl of noodles in the microwave and topping up Persimmon's food and water. Once his own food was ready, he took the bowl over to the couch to sit back and relax.
Of course, he didn't actually do much relaxing. It was hard not to think about what had just happened at Rocky's. Guise had seen Sweetmint get upset, and she had regaled stories to him about instances of violent tendencies, but he'd never actually seen her attack somepony until today. All things considered, it could have been worse. All she did was push Tapioca, and she didn't seem hurt—not physically anyway—but it was still a little shocking to see.
Guise was all for giving somepony their comeuppance, and Tapioca definitely had it coming for how much she had made Sweetmint's life more difficult. He was honestly kind of proud of Sweetmint for finally putting the airhead in her place. She was taking his advice and letting the people who annoy her most know how she feels.
So why did he feel like he wasn't enjoying this as much as he should? Maybe it was Sweetmint's reaction. Despite taking his advice, she didn't seem too satisfied by what she did. Whenever Guise got angry, it always made him feel better to take it out on somepony. Was it different for Sweetmint? Was her anger not an outlet to relieve frustration and stress like it was for him? He expected her to revel in it, not continue to stew. But they would talk about it when she got home. He was curious about what exactly was going through her head right now and how she felt about this.
But it was taking her a while to get back. Guise had finished his noodles, and had even started looking through Twilight Sparkle's book to brush up on his reading. At this point, it had been almost an hour since he'd left Rocky's Road and Sweetmint had yet to return. After what had happened, he expected she'd want to get home as soon as possible so she didn't have to look at Tapioca's face anymore. He had to wonder what was holding her up. The rain had since picked up, creating a chorus of white noise against the walls and roof of the building. Maybe she was waiting for it to let up a bit before trekking home.
But, eventually, Guise heard the sound of hoofsteps on the walkway outside. They were rather aggressive stomps that he could practically feel from inside. He could safely assume who was causing that, but a flash of green and white through the kitchen window was the clincher.
The door burst open suddenly, threatening to tear the hinges out of the wall. Guise didn't even have time to register the face of his girlfriend as her satchel was violently thrown across the apartment with a furious shout, bouncing off the coffee table and scattering everything upon it onto the floor, along with a trail of water droplets. Guise watched, wide-eyed, as Sweetmint, soaked from horn to hoof in rainwater, clomped over to the fridge to grab a beer, flicking the cap onto the floor and chugging half the bottle in one go.
Guise expected that she would still be in a bad mood when she got home, but if anything, she was even more upset than she was earlier. He could have sworn he saw the water dampening her face evaporating into steam. "Whoa, you okay there?"
Sweetmint shot a rage-fueled glower toward him. "He fired me!"
Guise blinked, still a little befuddled. "Who did what now?"
"Rocky," she elaborated, grabbing almost every bottle of beer they had in the fridge with her magic and taking it over to the coffee table. "He came by after you left, found out what happened, and fired me! Can you believe that shit?!" She plopped herself down on the couch next to Guise, paying no mind to the moisture soaking into the upholstery. "Persy!"
The cat almost immediately hopped up onto the back of the couch and wasted no time cuddling into his owner's mane, despite how wet it was; a testament to his dedication to comforting her.
"So, wait, you lost your job?" Guise asked, wanting to make absolutely sure he understood correctly.
"That's what 'fired' means, yes," she snarled, taking another sizable gulp from the bottle. "This is bullshit. I'm the only reason he managed to keep that place open for three years, and he has the gall to cut me loose. And for what? In defense of that dumbass bitch? When are men gonna learn to stop thinking with their fucking dicks?! There's no way he doesn't realize how little she actually contributes to his business. Does he actually think that her good looks are enough to keep customers coming in?"
"So who's gonna make the ice cream without you around?"
"What the fuck do I care? The place can burn to the ground now, I don't give a shit." She downed the rest of her first bottle and immediately grabbed another one. "But it'll probably be Rocky. He at least knows how to make ice cream. He just hired me so he wouldn't have to and could focus on just managing. I don't know, he might make Chips learn something to actually help out for once."
Guise sat quietly for a moment, thinking this over. "So... What now?"
Sweetmint didn't respond right away, just staring at the far wall and stewing in her anger, though Guise could see a hint of uncertainty in her eyes. She took another swig of beer and let out a long sigh. "I don't know, and I'm in no mood to think about it right now. So, the plan for now is to get drunk and talk shit about those assholes." She offered a bottle to Guise. "Care to join me?"
Guise contemplated the offer. This seemed like a pretty serious situation, but he wasn't likely to be able to have a civilized discussion with her about it when she was like this. He would have to wait for her emotions to simmer down so they could go into it with level heads, and if he joined her in drowning her problems in alcohol, maybe he could expedite the process. So, to that end, he shrugged and took the bottle.
***** ***** *****
"So, she says... She says, 'Like, you never taught me how to mix the ice cream.' So I'm like, 'Tha's why I'm tryin' to show you, moron.' I mean, how are you s'posed to learn if nopony shows you, huh? 'Oh, but I'm gonna get it all over my hooves.' Suck it up, princess."
Guise chuckled, perhaps a little more than what Sweetmint's story warranted, but everything seemed more entertaining in his current state. "Tha's a pretty good impression of her," he commented, his laughter causing him to wobble in his seat.
"Tha's because I hafta listen to it all day," Sweetmint groaned. She grinned, practically giggling already. "Hey, I can do an even better impression of Chips."
Guise observed with interest—or as best he could with how distorted everything looked right now. "Le's hear it."
The two of them just sat there in complete silence for several moments, Sweetmint visibly struggling to hold back her childish laughter.
"Are you... Are you gonna do it?" Guise asked, wondering if he had missed something in his addled state.
"Pfft, I just did," she tittered in amusement.
Guise struggled to understand, knitting his brow as he wracked his brain. "I don't get it. I never heard 'im talk, so I dunno what he sounds like."
"Tha's the joke, dumbass!" Sweetmint slurred teasingly.
She burst into laughter in response to his obliviousness and collapsed against him. Guise didn't currently possess the equilibrium to endure her weight, so the two of them fell lazily onto the couch cushions, Sweetmint giggling like a ninny and Guise just trying to keep his eyes open and prevent himself from passing out.
Sweetmint propped herself up onto Guise's chest, running a hoof over his fake, crimson fur. Guise figured she was going to lean in for a kiss, though he may have been mistaking her drunken, half-lidded stare for a sultry gaze. It must have been the former, because she groaned as she turned to the coffee table. She clenched her eyes shut, her horn flickering weakly with pink magic as she grabbed a near-empty bottle and slowly and carefully hovered it over to herself. She put it to her lips and threw her head back to guzzle down what was left, but appeared disappointed by how little she got out of it. She haphazardly dropped the empty bottle on the floor, giving Guise a firm pat on the chest as she laboriously crawled off the couch.
"I'm gonna see how much we got left."
With Sweetmint's weight lifted from him, Guise finally found the strength to pull himself up against the arm of the couch in time to see Sweetmint stagger and faceplant on her way to the kitchen.
She groggily got back up with a grumble. "Fuck's sake, Persy, don't run in front of Momma like that."
Guise glanced over his shoulder to the other end of the apartment where the tabby cat was sound asleep in his bed. At this point, he wasn't actually sure which of them was the one who was seeing things.
This had been a new experience for Guise. The day before, he and Sweetmint had a few drinks and got a little tipsy, but right now, he felt like his brain was out to lunch. His vision was blurry, he could barely sit up straight, and he struggled to form complete thoughts. Half the words that had come out of his mouth in the last couple of hours just kind of fell out without being prescreened by his brain first.
Apparently, this was a somewhat regular exercise for Sweetmint. She had told him that she liked to get drunk after a disaster of a day, but even with how emotionally unstable she was, those days were still few and far between. This was the first time he'd seen her any more than just a little wobbly. She was having to use the kitchen table and the counter just to keep herself from falling over again on her adventure to the fridge. She seemed to have a little better control of her faculties than Guise did, though. He felt like his legs would turn to paste if he tried to stand up.
But his observations during this time certainly yielded an interesting contrast. It was astounding how positively alcohol affected Sweetmint's mood. Earlier that evening she was on the verge of bursting a blood vessel, but now she was giggling like the idiots she was disparaging. They'd spent the entire evening talking smack about Tapioca, and Chips, and Rocky, and anypony else they could think of that crossed them in any minor way possible. So even if Guise was having difficulty just keeping his eyes straight, he had to admit that he was enjoying himself.
"Hey, guess who jus' found two more bottles at the back of the fridge~" Sweetmint sang victoriously, holding her trophies aloft. She made her way back to the couch, treading much more carefully now that she had precious cargo in tow. She passed one to Guise and plopped herself down again.
Guise watched as she twisted the cap off, tossing it onto the coffee table with all the others, and took an eager swig. He found himself staring at the content smile on her face. Even if the purpose of all of this was to forget ones troubles, he still found it difficult to believe that alcohol would so easily put recent events out of her mind. Maybe now wasn't the best time to bring it up and risk souring her good mood, but by the time that thought entered his mind, his mouth had already spoken the words.
"So what're you gonna do now that you don't have a job?"
Sweetmint scrunched up her face. Guise couldn't tell if she was upset that he'd brought it up, or if she was just thinking about it. "I don't wanna really talk about that right now. We're s'posed to be forgetting about that for now. S'probly something we should discuss when we're sober," she slurred quietly.
Guise gave in surprisingly easily after that, though he chalked that up to his brain maybe not being in the best state to argue something as important as that. Still, he'd brought it up for a reason, even if he wasn't entirely sure of the reason himself.
Sweetmint watched as Guise took a sizable gulp of beer, smirking proudly at him. "Ya know, I gave you some crap for being a lightweight yesterday, but for a first time drunk, you're holding your own pretty well."
Guise glanced at the bottle in his neon green grasp. For as bizarre as it felt being drunk, there was a strange feeling of familiarity that came with it. There was a faint, euphoric sensation that he could swear he'd experienced before. And that made him think of something.
"Didja mean what you said earlier?"
Sweetmint stared quizzically. "Wha? Wha'd I say?"
"You said you loved me more than anypony you've ever been with. Wazzat true?"
Her eyes widened a little. "Did I say that?"
"I think so," said Guise, starting to feel unsure himself. "It kinda stuck in my mind."
Sweetmint tilted her head, almost losing her balance in the process. "Mmm... Maybe I did." She let out a long, remorseful sigh. "Don't take this the wrong way, hun, I care about you a lot, but I dunno if I shoulda dropped the L-word so soon. I wasn't really thinking about what I was saying."
Guise wasn't entirely sure what to make of that answer. He was a little disappointed to hear that, but he also wondered if she really would have blurted that out if she hadn't meant it. "So... you don't love me?"
Sweetmint leaned against his shoulder. "Don't say it like that. I know this isn't exactly what anypony in a relationship wants to hear, but it's not you, it's me." She took a deep breath through her nostrils. "Can I let you in on a secret?"
Guise raised an eyebrow. "Uh, sure."
"I don't exactly have a great track record when it comes to relationships."
Guise said nothing. He'd already heard as much from her sister about the kinds of guys she's dated in the past, but he stayed quiet to let her continue.
"I told myself a long time ago that I need to stop letting my guard down around guys I like. I have a tendency to get too attached too quickly, and it takes me too long to realize how shallow they all are. I've been burned too many times, so I've been forcing myself to hold off until I'm absolutely sure. Thing is, I don't know how long I have to wait to feel confident about it anymore. How soon is too soon?"
"So you're worried that I'm just like all those other guys," Guise surmised.
"I don't want to think that, but I can't help it. Like I said, I really like you, Crimson, but I'm afraid if I say it too soon, I'll end up getting hurt. And if I wait too long to say it, I might hurt you. It's one of those, uh... Whatchamacallits... Catch-twenty-twos? I think that's it."
Sweetmint looked up to see the expression on Guise's face. He was staring back down at her, looking a little confused, but that may have been the alcohol. Still, she managed to smile again. "But... I dunno, maybe I'm just falling into the same trap again, but you've been so accepting and supportive... I went into this relationship telling myself to stay under control, then on our second date I just exploded. And you stayed with me. Not only did you stay, you encouraged me. So, I really do feel like you're different from the others."
Guise didn't comment on all of this. He didn't necessarily need to hear her say "I love you," he could determine that himself. He was surprised that she could be so lucid despite being drunk, but he also figured she wouldn't have opened up like that if she were sober.
She lifted her head from his shoulder, looking into his eyes apologetically. "You're not disappointed, are you?"
If he said he was, he'd only seem like those other guys she dated. But the truth was, he wasn't disappointed. Regardless of how she thought she felt, Guise was now more confident than ever that they were on the right track. So he shook his head with a drunken grin. "Nah. I'm not an expert on relationships or nothin', so if you're not ready to say it, then whatever. Take your time. S'not like I'm ready to say it either. Honestly, I really like you, too. I like hanging with you, you're one o' the toughest bitches I've ever met. There was only one person I knew that I respected as much as you, so it don't really bother me if you got some emotional or commitment issues. S'nice just to have some companionship in a world tha's just been crapping on me lately."
Sweetmint leaned toward him. "Well... Tapioca was right about one thing at least: you are a sweetheart." She gave him a tender, but somewhat sloppy kiss.
Guise grimaced at the sappy compliment. "Don't you start calling me that."
She giggled at how much deeper the red in his cheeks was getting. "Hey, want some ice cream?" She rose from the couch again, accidentally kicking a few empty bottles they'd left on the floor, and wobbled her way to the fridge again, returning to the couch with a couple of slices of ice cream cake.
Guise wasn't entirely sure how well ice cream went with beer, and his stomach didn't exactly feel as though it was in the best condition, but his brain wasn't in any shape to properly consider the consequences. He enjoyed the flavor and texture of the ice cream cake, moaning with delight. "Rocky doesn't know what he's giving up."
"Tha's what I told him! I told him if he just added stuff like this to the menu, he'd get a ton more customers. All the other ice cream shops in Canterlot have limited selections, too, so we'd have a leg up if we diversitified a little."
"Diversi-what?"
"That's just another reason for me to open my own place. I'd have so much shit on the menu, it'd make Rocky's head spin."
Despite her drunken rambling, Guise had to admire the determination in her eyes. She was opening up a lot tonight, and for some reason, he felt like he owed her something. Maybe it was the alcohol messing with his brain, but he had an idea. "Hey, wanna see something cool?"
Sweetmint's curiosity was piqued, like a foal who'd been offered a present. "Something cool?"
"Yeah. Since you shared a secret with me, how 'bout I share one with you?"
She leaned forward excitedly. "Lay it on me."
Guise smirked, and with a lack of hesitation that surprised even him, he enveloped his body with magical, green flames.
Sweetmint's eyes went wide with shock and wonder, for sitting with her on the couch was no longer a pony, but a changeling. "Whoa... How'd you do that?" she breathed, leaning closer in disbelief.
Guise chuckled, lifting a hoof to his lips. "Shh. I said it's a secret, 'member?"
She curiously raised a hoof and tapped one of Guise's pointed fangs, eliciting an annoyed grimace from the changeling.
"Stop that."
"That is cool. I didn't know you knew magic like that. Hey, check this out." Sweetmint grabbed his fork that he was using to eat his ice cream cake and, along with her own, stuck both of them in her mouth to emulate a crude depictions of fangs. "I can do it, too."
Guise couldn't help but laugh at her nonsense. "You look like an idiot."
"Takes one to know one."
"Gimme that back." Guise snatched one of the forks from her mouth to continue eating.
With no lack of intrigue, she watched him bite into his snack. "So, are you, like, a vampire or something?"
Guise cast her a quizzical look. "Wha? No. Uh, I mean, kinda, I guess? In a sense?"
"Do you drink blood?"
"Not from a glass or anything, just from the little bunnies and mice and stuff I eat."
"Gross." Despite the brief comment, Sweetmint still smiled and giggled.
"I like your ice cream better, though," Guise admitted, packing another big mouthful into his fanged maw. "Ish sho tashty." He shuddered, his eye clenching shut in pain. "An' cold..." Guise blinked, an odd and intriguing thought coming to mind. "What would blood ice cream taste like? Oh, or blood ice cream cake!"
"I don't care how drunk we are, I ain't makin' you no blood ice cream." She leaned into him resolutely, her warm fur rubbing against his smooth chitin. "But when we do open our own place, ice cream cake it gonna be one of our centerpieces."
Guise quirked an eyebrow. "'Our'?"
"Well, duh. What, you wanna be on dish duty your whole life? Oh, hang on." She got up from the couch again and staggered to the bedroom, returning about a minute later with a pencil and some blank sheets of paper. She sat down on the floor next to the coffee table and began to doodle and scribble messily. "I've got ideas and recipes for all sortsa shit I want at my place. Sorbet, sundaes, floats, banana splits... And that's jus' the menu. Wait'll you see what I want the place to look like!"
Guise just stared at her. He was surprised at how quickly she'd gotten past the fact that her boyfriend was a changeling. She was really all over the place when she was drunk. Now she was just fervently drawing up plans and recipes as though she were completely sober, though her penmanship suggested otherwise.
She cast a crooked smile over her shoulder at him. "C'mon. Help me out here."
As puzzling as this all was, Guise was in no state of mind to argue. So he just shrugged, stumbling off the couch and sitting next to her on the floor.
***** ***** *****
Guise stirred in his slumber, grumbling incoherently to himself. A blinding light was assaulting his eyes, even through his eyelids; it felt the same as if he were staring directly into the sun. If that weren't enough, his head was pounding. He hadn't felt a throbbing pain like this since he got his ass kicked by Wraith. It was like some tiny, unseen musician was belting out a raging drum solo inside his skull. An off-putting odor pervaded his nostrils, but he presumed it to be his own breath since it smelled and tasted like beer and regret. He also had an uncomfortable kink in his back, but he didn't yet have the strength to move from where he was.
Speaking of which, he had no idea where he was. All he could tell through his headache and his state of half-sleep was that he definitely was not in bed. Guise laboriously peeled his eyes open, his eyelids feeling as though they had been glued shut and also weighed a hundred pounds each. To add to the effort was the piercing light, giving him even more incentive to just lay there and try to get back to sleep, but his headache was going to make that difficult. So he found himself in a bit of a conundrum.
But his eyes were open now, and after a few moments of adjusting, he was able to identify the light as simply the morning sun shining through the kitchen window. The sky was still slightly overcast and moisture still clung to the glass from the rain they'd had yesterday, so the light shouldn't have been as bright as it felt. On top of that, he had a better grasp of his bearings now. His eyesight was level with the floor, his face resting on the carpet and in a pool of his own drool. He was laying in the space between the couch and coffee table, one of his hind legs still elevated by the couch after he'd apparently tumbled off of it at some point during the night.
With what little strength he had, Guise managed to prop himself up, using the couch for balance. He'd had a mild hangover the previous morning, but this was on another level entirely. He lifted a hoof to rub his eyes, hoping it would help him keep them open. But, oddly, his fetlock didn't feel as soft or furry as he expected. In fact, it felt uneven.
Guise glanced down at his leg, his eyes finally managing to open fully. Instead of a coat of fine, red fur, he saw black chitin and many holes. He glanced down at his body, finding much the same everywhere else, along with a pair of insectoid wings on his back. A feeling of dread suddenly came over him.
He remembered now. At some point during the night, Guise had willingly revealed himself to Sweetmint, though he couldn't recall why he'd done it, or what her reaction was. He needed to figure that out before anything else right now.
With no lack of effort, Guise finally stood up to have a look around the apartment. Empty beer bottles were littered around the apartment, and Persimmon was sitting on the coffee table, licking some melted ice cream off of a couple of plates that had been left there, and he noted that it was currently ten o' clock. But the one thing Guise was looking for was nowhere to be seen. He chanced a glance down the hall and noticed that the bathroom door was open and the light was on, so he decided to investigate there, quickly switching back to his pony form before peering inside.
Sweetmint was, in fact, in the bathroom, sitting on the floor and sound asleep, using the toilet seat as a pillow and looking more unladylike than he'd ever seen her. There were a few small stains of dried vomit on and around the toilet. It would seem she had had a harder time of it than he did.
Regardless of any concerns Guise may have had about what happened last night, he felt the need to wake her up, giving the unconscious mare and nudge. "Hey, Mint. Wake up."
Sweetmint groaned, her sleeping face contorting into a grimace. "Fuck off..." she mumbled, weakly flicking a hoof at him in a poor attempt at a disgruntled punch.
Honestly, he couldn't blame her for being disagreeable. His head was pounding hard enough, and he was pretty sure he hadn't drank as much as she did, so he could only imagine what she felt like, even if she supposedly had a higher tolerance. But he gave her another nudge anyway, if only to try and coerce her into finding a better place to sleep. "Come on, get up. I'll put on some coffee."
Sweetmint finally lifted her head, rubbing her eyes. "Ugh, what time is it?"
"Ten."
She groaned and pulled herself to her hooves. "Shit... I'm already late for work. I gotta get cleaned up. Damn it, I hate going in with a hangover." She lazily shoved Guise out of the way to get access to the mirror over the sink, splashing some water on her face to clean up the drool and dried vomit from her face.
Guise quirked an eyebrow. "Uh, Mint? You got fired, remember? That's the whole reason we're in this state in the first place, isn't it?"
Sweetmint just stared at her reflection for a moment before leaning against the sink with a long sigh. "Oh, right... Geez, we got pretty plastered last night, huh?"
"No kidding," Guise agreed, massaging his throbbing temple.
She looked at Guise with tired eyes. "You said coffee? I could use some of that right now." She pushed past him, dragging herself toward the kitchen.
Guise walked behind her. He was waiting for her to bring up a particular subject, one that he figured she'd be interested in getting more information about. He was hesitant to mention it himself, but he needed to know what her thoughts on it were. "So, uh... Do you remember anything from last night?"
"Nope," she answered bluntly, though with a small smile. "But that's how I know it was a good night."
Guise breathed a sigh of relief. It turned out that memory loss was a beneficial side effect of getting drunk, at least in this case. But after a close shave like that, it was safe to say that he wasn't going to be getting that drunk ever again.
Sweetmint passed him a cup of coffee before sitting at the table with one of her own. Guise followed suit and sat with her. "What about you, lightweight?" she teased with a smirk. "You remember much, or did you pass out too early?"
Guise thought hard about it. He only caught brief flashes of the night in his mind, but not enough to piece together anything they did, or anything they talked about outside of him shedding his disguise. The way that his drunken memories lined up in his head felt pretty similar to the memory scanning spell he'd copied from Glory; just flashes of sequential images, though a lot blurrier and distorted.
He shook his head. "Nothing coherent. I just know we talked about stuff, but I don't remember what."
"Well, I guess we got plenty of time to talk now, huh?" she responded with a groan.
"Speaking of which, there was a topic we were supposed to discuss," Guise reminded her. "What kind of predicament are we in right now?"
Sweetmint just shrugged as she took a sip of coffee. "We've been pretty comfortable financially since we started living together, but I don't think we can scrape by on just your paycheck alone. I'm gonna have to find another job A.S.A.P."
"There any other ice cream places hiring?"
"No clue. The only reason I was working at Rocky's to begin with was because it was the only job available that suited my skills. I might have to settle for something simple and menial until something better pops up." With a reluctant sigh, Sweetmint got up from the table again and began making her way to the living room. "I should probably get on that now. I can't really afford to sit around doing nothing."
She approached the coffee table in search of a newspaper, brushing aside the many discarded beer bottles littered around. But she paused, staring quizzically at something. "What's all this?"
Guise got up to see what she was on about. Sweetmint held several sheets of paper in her pink aura, analyzing them carefully.
"What is it?" Guise asked curiously.
He picked up a couple of sheets himself. While he didn't expect to be able to read anything written on them, the sloppiness of the notes made that an even more insurmountable task. And the doodles weren't much better, but such was to be expected from a pair of drunks. He glanced at Sweetmint. As befuddled as he was by this, he saw the increasing intrigue in her eyes.
"I think these are plans for an ice cream parlor. Look at all this," she said quietly, almost more to herself than to him. "Recipes, menus, even floor plans. And a lot of it matches up with the ideas I've had for my own place."
"Huh. I guess now we know what we were talking about last night." Guise glanced to her again as she stared wide-eyed and whimsically at the papers. "Mint?"
She grinned at him confidently. "Let's do it."
Guise quirked a puzzled eyebrow. "Huh? Do what?"
"Open our own place!" she exclaimed enthusiastically. "I was furious about losing my job, but maybe it was the kick in the flank I needed to actually go through with my original goal in coming here. I mean, look at this stuff! Even in a drunken haze, I know exactly what I want to do and how to do it! It's just a matter of getting everything off the ground!"
"And how exactly do we do that?"
Sweetmint's smile faded. The question had quickly taken the wind out of her sails. She looked over the papers again, looking like a child who'd just lost their favorite toy. "Oh, right... That's a good point. Even if I have the plans and the drive to do it, starting a business is gonna require money, and lots of it. And we don't have lots of money."
"How much would you need to get started?" Guise inquired.
She studied the plans her drunken self drew up. "Well, first of all, we'd need to buy a place. That would be the biggest expense by far. Plus we'd need all the equipment for making the products, and the stuff I have here in the apartment ain't gonna cut it. All in all, there's no way we could get started with anything less than, like, ten thousand bits, maybe more."
Guise grimaced at her estimate. "Yeesh, that's pricey. Is that realistic?"
"Not if I don't have a job." Sweetmint dropped herself onto the couch, letting the papers flutter to the floor. "Shit... I really fucked up this time, didn't I? I just had to let loose on Tapioca. Even if it was a pain working there, at least I was good at it. I probably won't find a better job than that that won't drive me up the wall just as much." She sighed regretfully. "Maybe I should go talk to Rocky and see if he'll give me another chance. Or at the very least apologize to Tapioca. I actually feel kinda bad about what I said, even if it was true."
"You think he'd listen to you?"
"Probably not. He didn't seem too bothered about firing me in the first, almost like he was waiting for me to slip up so he could give me the axe. And I don't exactly trust myself not to fly off the handle again if I have to look at his stupid face for too long."
Guise pondered the situation quietly. He felt at least a little responsible for this. He was the one who had told Sweetmint to show anypony who got under her skin who they were messing with. Would she have torn into Tapioca like she did if he hadn't encouraged her? With that thought in mind, he came up with an idea.
"What if I went to talk to him?"
Sweetmint stared at him, her eyes exuding both confusion and gratitude. "What?"
"Well, Tapioca's the reason you got fired, right? You said that Rocky looks favorably upon her because he's got the hots for her. And we know Tapioca has a thing for me, so why not use that to our advantage? I can talk to them and see if I can get Rocky to turn around his decision."
"That's... not a bad idea actually. You'd be willing to do that?"
Guise shrugged with a cocksure smirk. "It's not like there's much to it. I just have to talk to the guy for a few minutes and see what happens. I'm not gonna make any promises, though. Plus, in case it doesn't go well, you can use this time to search for another job, just in case."
Sweetmint hopped off the couch and tackled Guise with a grateful hug, catching the changeling off guard. "You're amazing, you know that?"
He chuckled self-assuredly. "Better than anypony else."
***** ***** *****
The plan was simple, all things considered. A brief conversation with Rocky, and maybe Tapioca in the process, shouldn't be difficult in theory. Of course, Guise knew full well that Tapioca wasn't the easiest person to talk to, nor did he ever enjoy it, but hopefully she'd be willing to back him up if he buttered her up a little. She likely wasn't too pleased with him for lying to her yesterday, but he expected a simpleminded mare like her could be easily won over with a little sweet talking, as revolting as the notion was.
The real wild card was Rocky. It had only just occurred to him today that he'd heard Sweetmint mention him numerous times, but he'd never actually so much as laid eyes on the guy. For somepony who was supposed to be running the business, it didn't feel like he had much of a presence there. The only thing he really knew about the guy was that he was Frosted Chips's older brother, and was apparently forced by their mother to hire him. Given that and his supposed attraction to Tapioca—a trait that ran in the family it seemed—he sounded like a real pushover. But if that was the case, why would somepony like Sweetmint have such a hard time getting through to him? She was tough as nails and was practically running the place in his absence. Guise was just going to have to assess him personally. Rocky had to be there now; with Sweetmint no longer working there, and how incompetent the other employees were, somepony had to make the ice cream.
But now that he was making his way back to Rocky's Road, he had to wonder why exactly he was doing this. If anything, this may have been a blessing in disguise for Sweetmint. She may have been good at what she did there, but she was clearly miserable at that job; with annoying coworkers and an ignorant boss, how could she not be? He didn't fully understand the logic. Maybe the chances of getting a job at another ice cream parlor were slim, but all she had to do was get another job and endure it long enough to make the money to open her own place. Although, there was no telling how long that would take. Even if she found another job, there was no guarantee she'd find one that paid better. And if this conversation with Rocky went well, maybe he could not only get her job back for her, but even convince him to give her a raise. Sweetmint did seem grateful for his offer, though, indicating that she definitely wanted her job back. It may have been that actually doing something she enjoyed offset the frustration brought on by everything else. If she were to work a job like the one Guise had, or some demeaning retail position, she might just snap entirely. But Guise was happy to put an asshole in his place either way. Even if he couldn't get her job back, it just meant that there'd be no consequences to tearing Rocky a new one.
Once he'd arrived at Rocky's, though, he slowed his roll a little. Guise discreetly peered in through the window from the street. He could see both Tapioca and Frosted Chips inside, doing what they usually do and slacking off. Tapioca was sitting at one of the tables, adjusting her fake eyelashes, and Chips was just staring at her, as usual. It wasn't like they had much to do seeing as there were no customers currently, and neither of them knew how to make the ice cream.
Speaking of which, Guise couldn't see anypony else aside from the two of them, meaning that Rocky wasn't there after all. But that couldn't be right. He had to be around somewhere, perhaps in the stock room taking inventory or something. Guise had come all this way regardless, and he wasn't intending to go back home without anything to tell Sweetmint. At the very least, he may as well talk to Tapioca.
With that in mind, Guise took a deep breath to prepare himself for dealing with her stupidity, though he had to actively remind himself that he needed to be nice to her. It was discouraging to know that he already had to double back on his resolution to stop giving a shit about anypony's feelings, but considering this was for Sweetmint's sake, he had to swallow his pride once again.
Guise stepped inside, the bell over the door signaling his arrival. The sound immediately grabbed Tapioca's attention, though her reaction was unlike every other time he'd stopped by. It started familiar, with a glint of interest in her eyes, but she must have quickly remembered the events of the previous day, as Guise noticed her ears flatten against her head, breaking eye contact a moment later.
This might actually be fortuitous. It would be better to talk to her first before he met Rocky so he could use her to win his favor. So, it was time to do what changelings do best and turn on the charm.
"Tapioca."
Just that one word seemed to gain her interest, her ears perking up slightly.
Guise placed his hoof gently on the table, doing his best to look remorseful. "I want to apologize for what happened yesterday."
There was a hopeful glint in Tapioca's eyes. "You do?"
"Yeah, and about the way I acted the other day while I'm at it." He took a seat with her at the table. He wasn't unaware of how closely Frosted Chips was watching him either, but ignored him; Chips had nothing to do with this, so Guise saw no need to even acknowledge his presence. "I wasn't in a very good mood and I took it out on you, so, I'm sorry for that."
A smile appeared on Tapioca's face. However, it was only there for a moment before she forced it back, trying blatantly to appear aloof, but failing to hide the obvious blush in her off-white cheeks. "I get that. I totally wasn't even mad about that anyway. You and Minty looked like you were pretty mad at each other, so, like, I knew you were pretty upset." She stared at him with genuine hurt in her eyes. "But I don't get why you lied about it. I saw you arguing with Minty, but you both said it didn't happen."
Guise felt like this was going to be child's play. Tapioca wasn't exactly what one would call "smart," so saying the right thing and summoning just the right amount of emotion would probably be an easy task. She may have been somepony who liked to take advantage of her feminine wiles, but Guise knew she was simple enough to be manipulated pretty easily herself. It shouldn't take much convincing to win her over.
"Tapioca," Guise started, his expression full of false sympathy and regret. "I don't know what to tell you. It's like I said: whatever you thought you saw wasn't the case. I wasn't with Mint at the café after you guys closed up shop."
Once more, just like yesterday, Tapioca was confused by the assertion. "But... I know I—"
"Are you sure you're remembering correctly?" Guise asked with fake concern. "I mean, Mint and I hang out over there everyday during our breaks. Maybe you just thought you saw her because you're used to seeing us there together."
She tilted her head, clearly still puzzled by the explanation. "You think?"
"They've done studies on this kind of thing, you know? When people are used to seeing something specific, they might still see it even if something's different," Guise lied, figuring a little bullshitting would help move this along.
Tapioca tapped her chin in thought. "Oh... I didn't know that. Geez, it's a good thing there are ponies out there who study brain stuff. Our brains work, like, really weird, huh?"
"Some do," Guise murmured.
"What?"
"Nothing. So, do you accept my apology?" he asked with crocodile tears.
She hummed for a few moments. For a second, Guise was a little worried that he would have to do more to convince her, but, once she looked into his pleading eyes, she gave him a smile after thinking it over as much as her brain was capable. "Aww, I can't stay mad at you, Crimsy. You're too sweet."
Tapioca leaned over with her hooves extended, but Guise pulled away.
"Okay, you're gonna have to stop doing that," he insisted.
Tapioca didn't have any issues backing off, though her smile did drop for a moment. "So... is Minty coming by to apologize, too?"
"Oh, uh..."
That was something he hadn't entirely considered. He figured getting himself back on her good side was all he'd need, but if she really wanted Sweetmint's apology, he was going to have to think fast. Even if Sweetmint said herself that she should apologize to Tapioca, it had seemed to him like the only reason she had to do it was because she regretted getting fired for it and not out of any actual respect for Tapioca. But if that's what she wanted, he could give it to her, even if it was an outright lie.
"She's not coming over, no, but that's not because she doesn't want to apologize," Guise explained. "She actually feels really bad, too, but she's afraid to see you again because she thinks you'll be really mad at her. She figured it might be better if I delivered her apology for her. Is that okay?"
"Oh... I guess," she answered, though with a touch of disappointment. "I kinda wanna hear it from her, but I guess I understand."
"Well, think about it like this," Guise started with a grin. "If I can tell her you accepted her apology, then she won't feel so pensive next time she sees you and can give you a proper apology in person. How's that sound?"
Tapioca's eyes lit up, and she smiled widely. "Okay, that sounds good."
Guise gave her a grateful smile. "Great. Oh, and while I'm at, we also wanted to know how you're feeling. You weren't hurt from your fall, were you?" he said, feigning even more sympathy in an effort to sweeten the pot.
She giggled bashfully. "Aw, that's sweet of you to ask, but I'm fine. I think I might have a small bruise on my butt, but that's it. Wanna see?"
Guise had to fight the urge to shudder in disgust, not needing Chips's disapproving glare to convince him to turn down the "generous" offer. "Uh, no, there's no need for that, thanks."
That had gone pretty much as smoothly as Guise could have hoped for. So, with step one out of the way, it was on to the next phase, which might prove to be a little more challenging. "So, hey, since we got all this cleared up between us, I was hoping to talk to Rocky. Sweetmint wants to know if he'd be willing to give her another shot. You know, seeing as she feels bad about how she treated you."
"Oh, yeah, that's a good idea," Tapioca agreed. "And I can, like, put in a good word or whatever if that helps."
"That'd be appreciated, thanks." Guise glanced around the parlor. "So, uh... Is Rocky here today?"
"Well, cha. I mean, who's gonna make the ice cream if Minty's not here, right?"
"Okay, so where is he?"
"In his office, I think?" she answered, though not sounding sure of herself.
Guise blinked, taking a mental note of how small the building actually was. "I... didn't know this place even had an office."
At that moment, the door to the back room opened and out stepped an unfamiliar unicorn stallion. Guise could safely infer that this guy was probably Rocky, but he didn't exactly match his mental images of the guy. Using Frosted Chips as a reference, he was expecting somepony thin and lanky, even a little nerdy. In truth, Rocky was rather burly, taller than even Guise and notably more muscular; a far cry from his greasy twig of a brother. His coat was a dark brown, and his mane was creamy orange and was surprisingly well styled, his bangs fashioned into white tips not unlike Chips's, but using actual hair gel instead of naturally-exuded oils. His cutie mark depicted an ice cream cone—unsurprisingly—with a scoop of vanilla ice cream. But what looked at first like chocolate chunks in the ice cream actually appeared to be small rocks; unappetizing to say the least.
The moment Rocky entered the parlor proper, he stopped, his eyes locking onto Guise. The changeling didn't budge as the larger stallion silently scrutinized him. Guise was waiting for this gruff-looking stallion to say something, the judgmental scowl on his face not exactly filling him with confidence about their upcoming chat.
Rocky narrowed his eyes at Guise, but a moment later they flew open, a wide smile spreading across his lips as he clomped a hoof on the floor. "Ah, got it! You must be Crimson Neon," he exclaimed, his voice not nearly as deep as Guise would have thought for a guy of his stature.
Guise got up from the table to approach him. "Yeah, and look, we need—"
Before he could finish, Rocky grabbed his hoof and shook it fervently. "It's nice to finally meet you, bucko! Name's Rocky Road. Mint and Tapi have told me a lot about you. You sound like a real swell fella from what I've heard."
Guise pulled his hoof away, waving it lightly to shake off the vibrations going up his leg. "Right, sure. But, listen, I want to talk to you."
"Lemme guess: it's about Mint getting fired, right?"
Guise narrowed his eyes. This guy was giving him a weird vibe. He was unexpectedly perky and amicable, and one would expect somepony like that to seem a little sympathetic of the situation. But the big grin on his face showed nothing of the sort. No anger in recalling Sweetmint's behavior, and no remorse about his decision. Something wasn't sitting right with Guise, but for all he knew, this guy could just be a moron like everypony else who currently worked there. He'd know soon enough either way.
"Yeah. You got time?" Guise requested.
Rocky glanced around his place of business to all of the empty tables and booths. "Only if you're not planning on partaking in our wares. Kind of a slow day in here. Let's take this to my office."
"Rocky."
The burly stallion looked to Tapioca with an accommodating grin.
She gave him a smile of her own, but looked a tad sheepish. "I just wanna say that I'm not mad at Minty anymore, okay?"
Rocky gave her an affirmative salute. "I'll keep that in mind. Follow me, Mr. Neon."
Guise followed Rocky into the back room, which wasn't anything special. It looked pretty similar to the stockroom at The Soup Spoon where all of the supplies were kept, and Rocky's place seemed to use it for much the same purpose, though there was also a sink present for cleaning up dishes and the like, and a freezer for storing the perishables and anything prone to melting.
But Rocky guided Guise to a connecting door off to the right. The room beyond that was Rocky's office, but it was rather cramped—Guise couldn't begin to fathom how Rocky had gotten his desk in there considering the large stallion had to shimmy his way between it and the wall just to get behind it and sit down. If Guise had to venture a guess, he could have sworn this office was just a repurposed broom closet.
"Have a seat," Rocky insisted affably, gesturing to an old, worn out chair in the corner.
Guise grimaced at the chair. The metal legs looked like they'd been rusting for years, and the leather seat cushion was considerably worn. He was half-expecting the thing to collapse the moment he sat upon it, but, miraculously, it held up under his weight as he pulled it up to Rocky's desk, though the cracked leather dug into his backside uncomfortably.
"So..." Rocky started with a long sigh, though his enthusiastic smile persisted. "Mint, huh? How's she handling it?"
"She's working off a hangover right now."
"That bad, huh?" Rocky chuckled. "Well, unfortunately, that's what happens when you don't treat your coworkers with respect. Violence in the work place is a big no-no around here."
"That's what I came to talk about," Guise told him. Given the unassuming grin on this mysterious stallion's face, Guise figured he needed to maintain a stern demeanor to make sure he was listening and understood that this was a serious conversation. "Mint needs this job. It's something she's good at and enjoys doing, and anywhere else she finds work probably won't give her the satisfaction she needs to make her everyday life tolerable."
Rocky shrugged, though he continued to smile, which was only proving to agitate Guise the longer he was in his company, especially with how indifferent it made him seem to the situation. "She probably should've thought about that before she assaulted poor Tapioca. That sweet girl never did nothin' to nopony."
"You heard her say that she wasn't mad anymore, right?" Guise reminded him. "Mint feels bad about what she did and wanted to apologize to her and you."
"And yet she's at home while you sit here in her place. If she needs and enjoys this job as much as you say she does, why didn't she come here herself? Don't answer that, it's rhetorical."
"You obviously know about her anger issues, so can't you give her some leeway or something?" Guise asked. "She has difficulty reigning in her emotions and has a tendency to just... explode when the stress piles up.
Rocky leaned on his desk with his forelegs crossed, his weight causing the wood to creak. He responded to Guise in a much lower and quieter tone, and while he continued to smile, his eyes were much more apathetic. "That's not really my problem now, is it?"
Guise's pupils narrowed slightly as he stared at Rocky's smirking, uncaring face.
"I mean, it isn't until it is, like now. But what I'm trying to say is that it's not our job to help her keep herself under control. That's on her."
Guise grit his teeth behind his lips at the sudden shift in Rocky's attitude. "Do you even realize what you're losing by firing her?"
"Oh, I never said that she doesn't have talent, far from it. I'm a little embarrassed to admit that her ice cream puts even mine to shame."
"Then don't you think she at least deserves a second chance?"
"'Second chance'?" Rocky echoed with a dark chuckle. "My friend, she's had more than enough chances over the past few years. You think this is the first time her temper has caused me and my employees problems? Her skill is the only reason I've kept her on this long. I've basically been looking for an excuse like this to fire her."
Guise felt his blood beginning to boil, the smarmy, self-satisfied curl of Rocky's lips infuriating him further with every word he uttered. Not only did this guy have no sympathy, he was actively proud of himself for firing her. "Where the hell do you get off?" he snarled.
Rocky's smile finally faltered, making way for confusion. "Hm?"
"I'll readily admit that Sweetmint's attitude can be problematic, I'll give you that, but what makes her the one that you're so eager to get rid of?"
Rocky raised an eyebrow. "You lost me, bud. What's this about?"
Guise stood up, knocking his flimsy chair over in the process as he slammed one hoof on the desk, using the other hoof to point in the general direction of Tapioca and Frosted Chips. "I'm talking about those two idiots out there with wool for brains!"
Rocky firmly pressed a hoof against the desk, the combined weight of the two stallions practically bowing its surface. The expression he wore now was the most serious Guise had seen from him since he first laid eyes on him. "Hey, now, pal, I won't have you slandering my staff, especially since one of 'em's my own kin."
"Mint was the only one who actually worked around here! You'd be losing literally nothing if you got rid of Tapioca and your brother!"
"I'm sure it must seem that way to you, but given Mint's disposition, she probably has a tendency to make mountains out of molehills. You're essentially approaching this from a position of bias."
"What the hell are you talking about?! Those two may as well just be spare tables with how little they do, and that's probably giving them more credit than they deserve!"
Rocky didn't appear bothered by Guise's belligerence. "How much time do you spend around here, Mr. Neon? I'm willing to bet not much, comparatively. Sweetmint's attitude is what's holding her back, while Tapioca's performance has been exemplary."
Guise blinked, dumbfounded by the ridiculous claim. "Where the hell are you getting that from?"
"From Chips."
And suddenly it was like the entire puzzle had come together. All this time there was a missing piece—or rather, a piece that Guise couldn't find a place for. He'd never even met Rocky until today, making his prior question sound more than a little ironic. So how would Rocky know any better than him what goes on around here? But now it was all starting to make sense. Sweetmint was the driving force behind this business, yet she was constantly getting shafted. Meanwhile, Tapioca did barely anything, yet she'd received a raise early on and constantly got away with coming in late and skipping work entirely. And all this time it was because of that mute little turd.
"Chips? You've been basing your decisions on him?!"
"Of course," Rocky answered proudly. "He tells me everyday how things went around here, and he has nothing but good things to say about Tapi." His smile shifted to a disappointed grimace. "But in contrast, I hear very little about Mint's performance unless she has one of her hissy fits. It's a real shame that somepony with such talent can't be as friendly or patient as somepony like Tapioca."
"You can't be serious! Chips does less around here than Tapioca! All he does all day is stare at her ass! He's just saying all that crap because he has a stupid crush on her!"
Rocky shrugged. "Listen, chum, I trust my little bro to be forthright and honest with me. I'll take his word over yours any day, especially since your opinion is based on the things Mint has told you."
Guise growled furiously behind clenched teeth. As a changeling, he wasn't terribly familiar with the concept of nepotism, but seeing as the unwavering faith that Rocky had in his brother was practically the entire reason why Sweetmint has had to struggle through her life in Canterlot, he couldn't help but become enraged. "That piece of shit is lying through his teeth! All he wants is for that bimbo to notice him, and he'll make up any garbage like that to get in her good books!"
Rocky glared sternly at him, his voice lowering another octave as he leaned forward to intimidate Guise. "I told you I don't appreciate you talking about my employees in such a manner. Now, I'm normally a pretty agreeable fellow, but when you start dragging my friends and family through the mud, you'd best be prepared to get a little dirty yourself."
A bloodthirsty grin spread across Guise's face. For as much as he was trying to remain low key in the couple of months he'd lived in Canterlot, there was always a part of him that was looking for a reason to get physical. Tearing out the throats of helpless animals could only do so much to satisfy his blood lust. "You think I'm scared of you?" he chuckled darkly. "I've dealt with guys way tougher than you, and even then I was more excited than afraid. If you want to throw down, I'm game."
Rocky leaned back in his chair, looking rather nonchalant. In fact, his self-important smirk came back in full force. "Alternatively, I could just have Chips fetch the royal guards. Violence isn't the only way to resolve altercations like this."
Guise scowled at the threat, but reluctantly backed off. That wasn't a bluff he could afford to call. If there was anypony Guise wanted to avoid in Canterlot if at all possible, it was the princesses and the royal guards. He didn't have much choice but to take the threat seriously.
Clearly satisfied that Guise had been adequately subdued, Rocky lifted his nose haughtily. "Alright, glad to see we understand each other. Now then, this little powwow has been fun and everything, but I think it's about time for you to be on your way, friend-o. And feel free to buy a bowl of ice cream on the way out. Like I said, it's been a slow day, so it'd be appreciated."
Guise glared at him a moment longer, practically shaking in his anger. It took every ounce of his willpower not to leap across the desk and paint the walls of the office red, but he managed to keep his fury under control and left with no more than a low, indignant growl and a loud slam of the door.
Once he'd returned to the parlor proper, Tapioca was quick to approach him with an optimistic smile. "So? How'd it go?"
Guise glowered irately. "What do you think?"
Her ears flatten in disappointment, proving that she wasn't entirely blind to context clues. But despite the bad news, she managed to keep grinning. "Oh, that's too bad. But I'm sure Rocky'll come around. He might look all big and tough, but he's really a total softy underneath. Just like you, Crimsy," she cooed.
Like usual when she got a little flirty, Tapioca leaned closer to him, but, also like usual, Guise firmly held her back, giving her a stern and, quite frankly, restrained glare. "Have you not learned your lesson yet? One of the reasons Mint lashed out at you was because you keep flirting with me. When are you going to take a hint and back off?"
She stepped back with a look of dejection. "Oh... B-But I—"
Guise held up his hoof to silence her. "You've already caused enough problems for us, so I'd appreciate it you'd leave us alone. Got it?"
She gave him a pleading look, appearing to be on the verge of tears again, but she said nothing. Guise took that as his opportunity to get out of dodge before Rocky came back out. But as he was heading for the door, he caught sight of a second set of eyes peering at him. As was the norm whenever Tapioca would be overly friendly with him, or if he said anything to upset her, Frosted Chips would always give him the stink eye, and this time was no different. Guise could usually ignore him, as his glare was the least intimidating thing he'd ever seen, but knowing what he knew now, it was hard not to leer contemptuously back at him. The raging fire in his eyes must have been visible, because Chips broke eye contact the moment he turned in the greasy kid's direction. Guise wanted nothing more than to deck Rocky's little watchdog, but he knew that would only end up causing more trouble.
Guise only cast one more glance over his shoulder at Tapioca, who was staring back at him pleadingly. It looked like she wanted to say something, and even took a step toward him, but then hesitated. Seeing as she'd apparently lost her nerve, Guise simply took his leave of the place.
He was not happy right now. Maybe in the long run this whole thing wouldn't matter as long as Sweetmint could find another job, but knowing that her employ at Rocky's had been entirely conditional the whole time, how little that asshole actually cared, and the fact that Rocky's decisions were being fed by his little brother's biased and hormone-fueled input was enraging. Guise's role at the moment was to be supportive of Sweetmint, and that was going to be difficult if he had to deliver this news to her, not to mention his current mood not exactly being conducive to the effort.
With that in mind, Guise desperately needed to let off some steam. Punching Rocky or his little brother right in their stupid faces would have been ideal, but he was obviously going to need an alternative. To that end, he made a beeline for the city gate, intent on sinking his fangs into a few defenseless critters. The tang of blood on his palate might help pacify his violent urges.
Guise casually trotted outside the city limits, walking some ways along the trail that led down the mountain. He traipsed into the surrounding foliage, far enough away from the path and the train tracks that nopony passing along would spot him through the ample vegetation. Once he felt like he was a respectable distance away from the city and safely out of sight, Guise breathed a deep sigh and shed his disguise.
And that's when he heard a quiet gasp.
Guise spun around quickly, and his eyes went wide with panic when he realized he wasn't alone. So focused was he on just relieving his stress and anger that he didn't even check to see if he was being followed. He never thought that anypony would bother following a random stranger outside the city.
But it had to be her, didn't it? Cowering behind a nearby tree, staring aghast in his direction, was Tapioca.
Shit...
For whatever reason, she'd followed him all the way out here, and as a result, she now knew his secret.
Tapioca didn't budge. She appeared to be frozen in shock, or fear, or both. But even in her confused and frightened state, she still managed to utter a single word. "Cr-... Crimson?"
Guise stared silently at her. He couldn't just let this go. This wasn't the same as with Daily Scoop. He needed to take care of this now before it became a serious problem. He took a step toward her with a resolute expression.
Tapioca shuddered under his gaze, taking a step back, but unable to do any more. Her pupils shrunk in fright the closer that Guise got. "Wh-What are you doing?" she stammered fearfully.
"Just hold still, and try not to scream."
Tapioca's legs began to visibly shake, and the creamy white shade of her face suddenly went even paler. And once he was close enough for her to see the blood red of his eyes, her own eyes immediately rolled back and she collapsed onto her side.
Guise blinked, staring down at the now unconscious mare. He shrugged with a sigh. "Well, I was going to knock her out myself, but that works, too." He groaned, running a hoof through his spiky, red mane. "You just had to go and make things even more complicated for me, didn't you? Now I've gotta figure out how to get out of this mess..."