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// The Ponk Part 1 
// Story: ⇩ Please Downvote! ⇩ 
// by Super Trampoline 
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Hey there, it's your favorite pony, Pinkie Pie! Trampo said I could take over this story for a little bit, so here I am. Weeeeee!!! I can do whatever I want, because it seems like that's what Super does, and no one seems to mind too much. So, uh, I don't actually know what to do now. Like, with the sky being the limit, and few restrictions being placed on what I talk about here, I almost feel paralyzed by indecision. You know how it is. But, you know, I guess I can always fall back on old standards. So, I'm going to teach you how to bake a super fun cake! Actually, better idea! Why don't I show you how to make some nightmareesque pork monstrosity?! 

Here is a horrible recipe:

1 pound pork shoulder, chopped into bite sized pieces

2-3 cloves garlic, minced

1/ 2 tsp ground cumin

1/ 4 tsp ground coriander

2 tbsp ground cayenne

2 tbsp olive oil for frying the pork shoulder

1 small sweet onion, chopped

2 cups of baby carrots

1 cup red kidney beans, rinsed

1 tablespoon soy sauce or any fish sauce

4 -5 bay leaves

1/ 2 tsp salt

3 cups heavy cream (see note below)

1 tsp mustard 

Mix all ingredients but cream together and cook at 375 degrees Fahrenheit for 45 minutes.

Once cooked, remove from heat and let cool completely. Place in a pan and add remaining ingredients (except cream ) and mix well. For the cream, add cream to a small saucepan , bring to a boil , and turn off the heat . Add the cream mixture to the pork shoulder and allow to cool. Serve with Lemonade.

Try cooking that and let me know how it goes in the comments. Alright, Ponkers out!