Princess Twilight Sparkle took a deep breath. She was the reigning princess. The leader of Equestria. She was wise, compassionate, and sincerely believed there was good in every creature. Even Trixie.
She was not the kind of ruler who would telekinetically throttle the mares standing before her throne before banishing them, then throwing them in a dungeon in the place where she banished them. No matter how tempting that sounded.
"So," she said. "Let's review. How did this all begin?"
Her human counterpart—well, born human, currently a unicorn and wearing a very familiar expression of trying not to wet herself while standing before aggravated royalty—gulped and tried to adjust her glasses. The resulting telekinetic vector miscalculation sent them flying for a moment before Sunset Shimmer, standing at the other Twilight's side, caught them for her and put them back on her muzzle. Human Twilight gave her a grateful smiled before she began. "Well, I was devising a medical nanobot, a sort of mechanical platelet, but the same issues that have plagued such attempts in the past hit this one as well: The surface area to volume ratio is untenable for long-term operation."
"The clot bot dot got hot," added Sunset.
Princess Twilight rolled her eyes. "Yes, thank you, Sunset, I gathered as much."
"That's mostly for the journalists, Twi— Your Highness." Sunset gave a significant glance to the array of pegasi hovering near the throne room's rafters, notepads and cameras in hoof. "I think Celestia taught you a similar lesson?"
After a moment, Princess Twilight nodded. It had been after she'd gotten the wings, but Celestia had taken her aside one day and told her about the benefits of nudging the media towards headlines you wanted to see. "Alright. So, H-Twilight, I take it you turned to magic for a solution that your world's native science couldn't solve?"
"Well, first I exhausted every route I could using that science. I tried a chemical approach rather than a mechanical one, but those prompted an immune response as if they were rogue bits of biological matter."
"The not-hot clot snot got rot-sought," Sunset said to the fourth estate's peanut gallery.
"Then I..." H-Twilight trailed off as she considered her audience. "Well, I attempted a number of other more mundane approaches that I'll summarize for the court's time: None of them succeeded. Rest assured that when I say exhausted every nonmagical route, I mean it."
Sunset nodded. "She thought and fought and sought a less fraught, not-hot clot bot dot, but 'twas all for naught."
Princess Twilight steepled her forehooves and glared over them. "Which brings us to Equestria."
"I was going to investigate the magical possibilities in my own world at first, but Sunset suggested we visit Ponyville first."
The princess's gaze turned to Sunset. "Really, now."
"Only as a way for me to clear my head!" cried H-Twilight, darting between Sunset and the princess's gaze like she was trying to take a bullet.
"She was stretched taut and tied in knots. She got squat and thought it a blot. So I thought to swat that rot, she ought to trot and stot in this spot."
Princess Twilight raised an eyebrow. "And drink, apparently."
Sunset shrugged. "Always helped me when I was stuck on a problem."
"You're not going to 'ot' that?"
That got a devilish grin. "I'm not."
After a moment of silence and no small number of eyelid twitches, the princess turned back to her counterpart. "And then?"
H-Twilight's ears folded back. "I haven't had much experience with alcohol, and, well... I believe Sunset has mentioned your own unusual behavior in another body?"
Sunset smirked. "You sought plot."
"Jot not, you lot!" Princess Twilight cried up to the rafters. She facehoofed. "Now you've got me doing it. Okay, yes, I recall my my experience with the human Flash Sentry and pubescent ape hormones. Are you saying this was something similar?"
H-Twilight sat, the better to shrug. "Possibly? That or it was stress and I should avoid alcohol in both worlds if I've been working too hard."
"The sot bought enough draughts to float a yacht."
"That's not how you pronounce 'draught,'" both Twilights chorused.
"Well I can't say 'shots,'" said Sunset, crossing her forelegs. "We only had beer."
"And I wasn't a sot. It was only three..." H-Twilight wilted under a pair of knowing gazes. "Four... Okay, six glasses. I'd assumed an equine metabolism would process it quickly."
"And where were you in all of this?" the princess said to Sunset.
"Matching me beer for beer," answered H-Twilight, giving Sunset a near-identical glare.
Sunset just tossed her mane. "The drinking age over there is twenty-one. It's barbaric," she said otlessly.
Princess Twilight rolled her eyes. "And then?" she asked her counterpart.
"At that point, the local Fluttershy came in... along with her friend Tree Hugger. Who suggested what seemed like a reasonable idea..." H-Twilight winced. "After half a dozen beers."
Even Sunset showed some signs of regret at this point, gaze falling to the floor. "I knew we ought not, but we got caught by a bon mot and the pot she brought to Flutter's motte."
"At which point you were so thoroughly incapacitated that you probably should've passed out. Instead?"
"Well, I don't entirely recall how," said H-Twilight, "but the conversation turned to the metric system. And then the highest value prefix therein. And Treesy—"
Up went the eyebrow again. "'Treesy'? Really?"
H-Twilight matched the expression. Several of the pegarazzi captured the moment. "I'm you. Are you really surprised I make friends quickly?"
Princess Twilight dipped her head, ceding the point. "Proceed."
"She asked just how much that was. So..." H-Twilight looked away again. "Well, again, I'm you. Same glimmer on my butt and everything." She gestured towards her cutie mark.
The princess grimaced. "It's really more of a sparkle."
Her counterpart pressed on regardless. "Which meant that between Sunset and me, we had enough raw magical power to actually demonstrate it. So I targeted a cherry, and, well..."
Everypony looked out the window to the former site of Ponyville. And the Everfree Forest. And pretty much all of Canterlot's western skyline. In its place was a mountain of small red fruit stacked up higher than the mind wanted to think about.
"You cast a duplication spell," concluded Princess Twilight. She dragged her gaze away from the sight. "One set to ten to the twenty-fourth power. And remind me, just what did you say as you cast the spell?"
H-Twilight winced. "It's not a lot," she squeaked out. "It's a yott."