Two weeks after the promotion
Dear Starlight,
I just thought I would report to you how things have been going. Things have been going quite well. Running the school isn't as hard as I thought it would be although coming up with a fresh curriculum has been a challenge but I always get it done. Thankfully I have Sugar Belle by my side to assist me with it, she is a huge help and is always full of new ideas. Also, Iron Will is doing a great job as guidance counselor and surprisingly, he hasn't turned all the students into narcissistic troublemakers who speak in the third pony.
While things have been going well here at the school, things have not been going so well at home, well on Sundays anyway. Luster didn't show up on one Sunday and on the other she was a total bitch. She was so horrible that one of the other maids slugged her but oh well, she did a sub-par job and one of the other maids had to clean the bathroom since she didn't do a good enough job. I also heard her screaming, cursing you and Twilight's names when she thought she was alone. I was planning on approaching her over it but I figured I'd just tell you and let Twilight deal with her.
Remember how I said I was planning on adopting a cat? Well I did that. The cat I adopted is solid black and is named Shadow and he is a very affectionate kitty. He even likes most of the other maids although he did scratch Luster's face when she tried to pick him up. I'm glad he scratched her though, she should not be trying to pick my cat up when he doesn't like her!
Well I do hope all is well for you and Twilight. Again thanks for the promotion and everything that came with it.
Thankful,
Bright Beam
Dear Bright Beam,
Well that is good to hear that all is well down there. I am glad to know that if you need help, you'll ask for it instead of simply trying to tackle it on your own and screw up like Luster would. I knew Sugar Belle was the right choice to be a vice head mare since she is smart, helpful, caring and is good at making sweets. I am shocked about Iron Will though, I thought for sure that he would have transformed all the students into narcissistic jerks and he would have had to be replaced.
That is very nice that you decided to adopt a cat, especially a black one. Black cats are often times adopted less frequently than others because so many ponies buy into these stupid superstitions that are featured in the My Little Human comic books. It makes me cringe to think about things like that but I am happy that your cat seems happy.
Now you be sure and tell Shadow that I am happy that he scratched Luster. I am hoping that he hates her as much as my sister does because from what my hot sister tells me, she is undeserving of being liked by anypony, anycat or anyone for that matter. Now be sure and punish her in one way or another for not doing her job. Hell I will loan you a whip so you can whip her OR maybe you could con the spa twins to put out for you instead of her! I don't know if you'd be up for having fun with the spa girls but I know they'd like you a whole lot more!
Now I will be sure and talk to my sister about Luster's sorry job performance and her cursing my sister's name. Oh this is going to be so much fun!
Happy Your Cat Scratched Luster,
Starlight
To My Sub-Par Student,
Well Luster, I have heard some rather interesting news. I have heard that you didn't show up one Sunday, you have been doing a poor job, you have been cursing Starlight's and my name and I heard you harassed Bright Beam's cat. Now all of that is 100% unacceptable. I am not even sure what the hell to do with you anymore but do know this, I think Starlight is going to contact the spa twins and tell them to toss you to the side and engage in sexy times with Bright Beam instead. I know Bright Beam is pure and all but if Starlight convinces the spa hotties to put out for her and she also convinces Bright Beam to have fun with them, she'll do it. I personally hope she does so she'd have fun on Sundays and you'd be with nopony who will put out for you!
Tell you what though, I'll let you out of cleaning Bright Beam's house since you do a shitty job to start with, well that and I have my concerns that you would steal things. Anyway, have fun not having anypony who will put out for you loser!
Your Superior,
Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle
Twibitch,
Oh yes, just because I'm not little miss perfect like Bright Beam you're going to take the one thing that makes me happy away and give it to her. I honestly don't get why the hell you hate me so much. I get it, I'm not an ass kisser and I don't approve of you and your sister bucking all the time but still, you could allow me to have a little bit of happiness down here. Oh well, I can still try to lure Bunny Tracks into my needy hooves or if I can catch Diamond Tiara while she is alone, I know she'll put out for me. Maybe I need to just force some Luster into Silver Spoon's life and then her, Diamond and I could have a threesome. In the mean time, go to Tartarus. I'm not in any mood to write more.
Pissed at you,
Luster Dawn
Aloe and Lotus,
You know how you have been putting out for my shitty, sub-par bitchy protege? Well I am issuing an executive order that you are to deny her, all the time. I have decided that you shall put out for my sister's protege, Bright Beam instead. I don't know how often she will want it but I'm sure once she experiences you two, she'll want to spend every single Sunday with you! Contact her and let her know that you'll give her all the loving she could ever imagine, alright? Anyway, I have to go because Starlight and I have to do some much needed bonding.
Sincerely,
Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle
Goddess-Queen Twilight Sparkle,
That sounds like a good plan. We do not find Luster all that attractive, she does nothing but bitch and complain all the time and she won't engage in any of the activities that we enjoy doing together. We have seen Bright Beam and we do find her attractive and have heard good things about her. Don't worry, we will get in touch with her and hopefully she'll join us.
Thankful,
Aloe and Lotus