//------------------------------// // The Trial of the Diadem // Story: The Seven Trials of Mi Amore Cadenza // by TheDriderPony //------------------------------// The Royal Vaults were not the kind of place an individual would wish to spend their free time, excepting perhaps truly dedicated scholars, undead, and mimics. As far as scholars went, only three had the necessary clearance to access these lowest levels; one was retired and two were in Ponyville. Undead had been banned in Canterlot since the Great Uprising of '64, and mimics had been driven to extinction by Princess Celestia nearly seven hundred years ago (or so was the official story. It wouldn't surprise Cadance one bit to learn that the Princess had kept a few around down here for security. Time and time again she'd seen Celestia use her favorite tactic of defeating an ancient evil, keeping a part of its power on hoof or in her service, and in the event that it finally escapes or rises up, use it at a lesson or test. That was how Candace's fifteenth birthday party had turned into an impromptu education about how to out-lawyer a high demon with more than just her birthday presents on the line.) As it stood, the only ponies who descended the long spiral staircase into the depths of the mountain were Princess Luna, a pair of her Night Guards, and Cadence herself. Among them, only Luna seemed pleased to be there, skipping down the damp steps sometimes two at a time. "I must say, I am rather glad you came and asked to see my vaults, young Cadance." The pep in her step was not lacking from her voice. "In truth, with all the chaos and adjustment since my return, I had practically forgotten them myself!" Cadance lowered her head, mostly so she wouldn't hit it on a low-hanging torch bracket again. "I feel like I should be thanking you. I never imagined that I'd be able to recover the diadem so easily." Not that she'd say it aloud, but it was actually something of a disappointment. When she started her journey that morning on the train, she'd been expecting to find more adventure than simply going up and asking for the artifact like a foal at a library.  "It is no trouble. While I did not know Darkened Peridot personally, I knew of and respected her abilities as an enchantress. It would be a waste for her talents to lay mouldering away, unused and forgotten." They arrived at the lowest level, deep within the bowels of Mt. Canter. The floor was a solid piece of unblemished obsidian that reflected the torchlight in odd ways and made it seem like they walked across pure void. The walls were the natural unhewn stone of the mountain itself which made Cadance think this chamber had once been a natural cave. Aside from the walls and floor, the only other landmark of note was The Door. It was the kind of door that could only be spoken of in capital letters. Made of wide timber planks and braced with bars of rune-covered silver and iron, it looked more like it should have been defending a castle keep from siege rather than sleeping untouched underground. It made the mind wonder what kind of things was it designed to keep out. Or in. "What do you think?" Luna asked eagerly, her eyes sparkling, "I designed the place myself, though I regret that few have ever had the chance to see it. I was trying for a very imposing minimalist theme to make intruders feel small and powerless." "You've... certainly succeeded at that." Cadance agreed. Just standing in the vault's antechamber was making her fur stand on end. Something about how neither light nor sound seemed to bounce back properly. She thanked her lucky stars that Chrysalis hadn't found this place when looking for a cave to lock her in. Luna beamed at the praise. "Wonderful! I'm so glad you think so. Though in confidence," she leaned in conspiratorially, "the budget ran short near the end so I stole one of Celestia's warded doors from our old castle." Now that she mentioned it, upon peering closer Cadance noticed that the center crossband was inscribed with the phrase: Hall of Arcane Research and Enigmatic Mysticism. Entry forbidden without express permission of the Sovereign of the Sun. She decided, for the sake of her mental health, to leave that particular mystery alone. Luna approached the door like an old friend. "Just a moment and I'll have us inside. I cannot wait to see what of my old possessions have survived my absence! My preservation spells are second to none!" Reaching the door, she slid aside a false panel cleverly hidden within the woodwork to reveal a curious decoration. A dozen hoof-sized gemstones, cut into curved disks and inset into the door. There was a hint of magic in them; a lattice that wove through the door itself and connected to something within the vault, beyond magical sensing. Luna tapped the stones in a seemingly random order and then waited. Nothing happened. Frowning, she tried again, changing the order slightly. Again, nothing. Once more, this time a completely different order. In response, a pea-sized ruby protruding above the others glowed, briefly casting those present in crimson hue.  Luna turned around, her face red from more than just the ruby’s light. She gave her guards a look and cleared her throat. Dutifully, they folded their ears shut.  "It would seem," she said stiffly, almost reluctantly, "that I have forgotten my password." "Your password?" Cadance allowed her expression to droop, but internally she was delighted. Finally! A challenge to properly start her quest! "So we can't get inside?" "Oh no, that is easily done." With a blue flash from her horn, a loud clunking noise resounded from within the vault. The door swung open, splitting cleanly on invisible seams. "However, without my password, I am unable to deactivate the traps." "Traps?" Cadance asked, doing her best to hide her excitement, "Why would there be traps in your personal vault?" The princess hesitated before responding. "When the vaults were being built, I was in the beginning stages of my... fall from grace. Not enough to influence me greatly, but enough still that I was growing suspicious of my sister and her intentions. In response, I installed certain security measures around areas I deemed private." Her expression brightened and the guards seemed to take this as a signal to uncover their ears. "But worry not! I don't remember exactly what traps and spells I may have placed, but I am sure I was not so far gone as to include anything lethal. Probably. You may go ahead, if you wish, as I continue to try and remember the password out here." She gave Cadance an appraising look. "Before you go in though, you do share mine and my sister's alicorn durability, correct?" Choosing not to dignify that with a response, Cadance stepped forward towards the open chamber. One way or another, she finally had what she was looking for. Adventure. A challenge. Something new and different to match herself against. And what a perfect setup it was. Dodging and disarming ancient traps in a forgotten treasure room. It couldn't be better if Shiny himself were DM-ing it for her himself. As the adventurous alicorn crossed the threshold, she felt a slight tingle in her horn and wings. Maudite. The walls were lined with it. Without direct contact it couldn't fully block her magic, but even then the sheer amount in near proximity was enough to limit her to simple spells only. A clever opening move. In one easy step, paranoid past-Luna had disabled a large share of potential intruders and seriously hampered the rest. Excellent. She didn't want it to be too easy. She kept one eye on the ceiling and one on the floor as she made her way deeper in, wary of both tripwires and falling nets. Just because the traps were "probably nonlethal" didn't mean they were "probably safe." The vault and its contents were nothing like she'd expected. The main vaults on the higher levels (Celestia's, that is) were arranged more like a museum, filled with cursed tomes bound in chains to pedestals alongside mysterious arcane artifacts isolated behind layers of enchantments. Contrastingly, Luna's vault looked more like a warehouse filled with shelves and racks of knick-knacks and weapons. There was an occasional book or piece of jewelry, but they were given no special place above anything else. Halfway across the room, the stone floors turned to carpet —a rather expensive-looking one at that— made in old Eastern Unicorn Empire style. Easily worth a small fortune for its historic value alone. It almost seemed a shame to walk on it, yet she did anyway for it was the only way forward. That is, until it suddenly gave way under her hooves. Cadance suddenly found herself with an awful lot of time to think as adrenaline made time slow down. A pitfall. She'd been deceived by the oldest trick in the book. Not even a proper magical trap, literally just a hole in the ground with a cover over it. How could she have been so foolish as to not see it? Had her hubris truly been so great that while scanning for all forms of magic, she'd failed a most basic check of her surroundings? She was a shame to Celestia's teachings. Then again, these traps were meant for Celestia, weren't they? So perhaps, rather than failing to follow the instructions as she'd been taught, she followed them a little too closely. That made her feel slightly better about everything. Still, either way, it didn't change the fact that she was falling. Though not for very much longer. Cadance hit the bottom of the hole with a thud, winded but intact. Thank goodness for alicorn resilience.  She took stock of her situation as she rose. She was about four celestials deep (give or take a horn) in a pit just wide enough to stand in. Not much light reached the bottom, but there was just enough to make out a peppering of holes scattered across the sides. Maybe she could use them as hoofholds to climb out? Before she could consider an attempt, something began to emerge from them. Cadance coughed as something heavy and gritty poured through holes in the wall, quickly burying her up to her barrel. Was she going to be buried alive? Was that the true nature of this trap? Before she could come to terms with that thought, the holes switched to expelling a thick sludge. Had the grit only been a restraint to hold her as she drowned? Not one to let her dwell on a thought too long, the sludge stopped at neck depth and was replaced by an oppressive heat. She was immediately reminded all too clearly of the one time she'd tried to fly over a volcano. The heat was intense, sweltering so, but apparently not enough to ignite either her fur or the sludge, which thickened rapidly as it shifted and mixed with the grit. After what felt like ages, but was only mere moments, the heat dissipated. Her struggling and the heat had done something to the slurry, firming it into a full-body prison that allowed only the slightest of movements. Thankfully her head was still clear, but she was well and truly trapped now. “Cadence?” she heard a voice call from above. “Are you alright? I remembered the password, so it should be safe now. Where are you?” “Down here!” she yelled back. While she hadn’t really been worried about the trap (it’s creator was standing only a few paces away, after all) the unexpected immobilization and denial of her magic was still more than a little unnerving. After a few seconds, she felt the familiar tingle that came with being carried in somepony else’s magic field. Slowly, the circle of light above her grew larger and larger as she reached the surface. The first thing she saw upon exiting the pit was the Lunar Guards. Despite their strict code of professional stoicism, both looked completely gobsmacked. Even Luna failed to reign in her surprise as she lowered Cadence to stable ground. Neither reaction filled her with confidence and she finally began to feel a slight edge of fear. “What’s wrong?” she asked, “Why can’t I move? What’s happened to me?” Notes of panic colored her voice. What in the world had the ancient magics done to her?  Rather than answering, Luna responded by manifesting a mirror. Moments later, Cadence’s expression matched the others’. She was... a treat. More accurately, a cake.  To be even more precise, she had been baked into a cake. “I… what?” Luna coughed, her face blushing furiously. “I do believe I remember what the triggers for the traps were now. In my defense, it was made to detect foreign alicorn magic and, at the time, there was only one other alicorn to consider.” Cadance barely heard her. The cake was creamy-white and fluffy and encased her entire body like a giant minotaur's fist, leaving only her hoof- and wing-tips free (along with her head, of course). She vaguely resembled a foal wearing a very elaborate costume for a school play, ready to waddle onstage to recite some stilted poem about baked goods. Encircling her neck was text written in vivid yellow icing, though the words were unfamiliar to her. "What does that say?" Cadance craned her neck for a better angle but the spongy cake held her tight. "I can't read it." "I am not surprised, as it is in Old Ponish. It reads..." Luna stopped mid-sentence, her eyes going wide as they scanned the iced words. "Oh my. I really was quite juvenile back then." "What? What does it say?" "Roughly translated, it reads Behold the Glorie of ye Sun! Our flanks art so Thick and Fattened from Sweetmeats that We hast become what We et." Silence reigned in the vault. And then Cadance giggled. She chuckled and chortled and soon fell into a deep belly laugh. The tension defused instantly as the others joined in. And it was funny, genuinely so. From the sheer inventive ridiculousness of the idea, to the fact that it clearly had never meant to be targeted at her, how could she find it as anything other than hilarious? Now if Celestia herself had been present to see it, that would have been a different story. But with the butt of the joke absent (and the discovery that certain popular punchlines existed across millennia), it was hard not to laugh at the sheer absurdity of it all. “Hey, you two,” Cadance called out to the guards as best she could through her giggles. She slightly regretted not having learned their names. “You want to put those spears to work and cut me out of here?” “An excellent idea,” Luna agreed. “Mothchaser. Lantern Light. Please free my niece from her caketivity. In the meantime, I will attempt to find our missing relic.” With the careful use of their spears (and what little magical assistance Cadance could provide), the cake was quickly stripped down to servable portions. The guard known as Mothchaser tried a piece and declared it “surprisingly good, considering the thousand year old ingredients”. It was not long after that Luna returned with their prize (as well as a ratty old cloak she’d draped across her shoulders and a saddlebag filled with other memories). The Crystal Diadem was a marvelous thing. It didn’t look like it had been carved, but rather grown out of living blue crystal. The design was deceptively simple, yet riddled with minute twists and interweavings that would take a master artisan to recreate. Topping it was a single large gem (rather, a portion of the larger whole shaped to look like a separately cut piece) cut in starburst style. “I believe this is rightfully yours,” Luna said as she placed the diadem atop Cadance’s head. As its arms settled around her ears, Cadance felt the web of magic within it pulsing against her own. It was like having a small kitten on her head; constantly shifting and probing and making itself known. “Thank you. I’ll do my utmost to use it to its full potential.” That being said, she still had no idea just what the Crystal Diadem was supposed to do. The Crystal Heart had been well-explained and straightforward, but this came with no manual whatsoever. And yet, she could feel its magic moving against her own. For whatever unknown purpose, it wanted to be used. Tentatively, she allowed a little magic to bleed into it. Not structured like a spell, just the unshaped energy. Almost immediately she felt a drain as the imbued spell took what was necessary and surged to life. Six points of silvery-blue light burst from the center jewel. They formed into short beams that spun like an unsteady compass before settling into position, distributed unevenly around the gem. Two pointed roughly westward, while two more pointed south and southwest, one due north and the sixth a few degrees north of east. “Of course!” Luna gasped, stepping closer. The longest of the beams passed through her hoof as though it wasn’t even there. “Now I remember! One of the Diadem’s functions is the ability to locate the other parts of the set in the event they are separated.” Cadance's ears perked up at the sound of opportunity. Finding the artifacts was one thing, but even succeeding there brought them no closer to finding out their true history. How they worked, why they were made, and —possibly most important of all— what they actually did.  Luna could be a key factor in rectifying that. She'd been there at their conception, even if she hadn't been involved. If luck was on their side, she could be an invaluable resource in solving the mysteries surrounding the Crystal Relics. "Do you remember what they were meant for?" Cadance pressed, "Or what any of the other ones did?" "Not clearly." Luna shook her head, regret evident on her features. "My memories of those years are clouded with darkness. However, I fully intend to work with your wizard Sunburst on uncovering whatever we can. I too wish to see the Empire's history recovered and I hope that my memories and magical acumen can be of some aid." Well, it was better than nothing. And she was more than willing to help (though Cadance had expected that much. Her darker Aunt's schedule was never exactly full).  Being encaked was not how Cadance had expected to start her adventure/vacation/historical-artifact-recovery tour, but it was nothing compared to some of the pranks Celestia's previous student before Twilight had pulled on her. Some of those made the cake look like, well, a cakewalk. But a little embarrassment was more than worth the reward. Not only had she succeeded in acquiring the second of seven artifacts, but also a font of helpful information about the others as well.  She had a roadmap now, a guidebook to her adventure to lead her exactly where she needed to go. All she had to do was follow the lights of her newest accessory. Then again, this was also meant to be a vacation, so maybe it wouldn't hurt to take the long way there.