The Great Whiskey Adventure

by Universal Librarian


Chapter 1 - Penderyn

There was a tremendous squealing from the brakes as the train slowed to a stop in Ponyville Station. A few moments later the doors opened and the usual rush of ponies either alighting or climbing aboard began. Out of the crush of ponies and other visitors, a lone, dark figure emerged. 

The figure made his way out of the crowd and strode purposefully towards the exit. His mission was clear; find the target and acquire the assets. All measures and expenses were authorized, failure would not be tolerated.

Exiting Ponyville Station, the figure paused just long enough to get his bearings, then set off in search of his target.


Gilda sighed as she wandered through Ponyville. She had originally planned on visiting Rainbow Dash while the Wonderbolt and Teacher had some rare time off, but something had come up and the pegasus had been called away on urgent business, putting the rekindling of their friendship on hold for now. 

Annoyed that she'd come all the way from Griffonstone for nothing, Gilda blew a lock of hair out of her eyes and looked around to see if she could find something to do, anything that would make this less of a wasted trip. She paused as she spotted Sugarcube Corner. Visiting Pinkie could be worth a shot, if only to try and get more ideas on how to improve her baking. 

"Look out! Coming through!" Gilda looked up just in time to catch a glimpse of a pink pony with a purple mane before it crashed into her and the two tumbled to the floor in a tangle of limbs.

Shaking her head to clear it, Gilda extricated her legs and shoved the offending pony off her. "Hey! Watch where you're going!"

To her surprise, the pony dove back at her and planted her hooves on Gilda's shoulders. "You've got to help me!" Gilda blinked in surprise and opened her beak to say something, but the mare just pointed back the way she'd been running from. "Please, they're after my treasure!"

"Treasure?" Distracted by the thought of bits, it took Gilda a second to spot who the mare was referring to, and a second more to really wish she hadn't. A red unicorn stallion wearing a coal-black cloak and mask was striding purposefully down the street towards them. A coat of arms featuring a barrel with the heads of three snarling dogs rising from behind was emblazoned prominently on the cloak. "Whoa! Who's that!"

"The League of Cerberus!" the mare hissed. "They're after me!"

"Berry Punch," the stallion called out in a deep, menacing voice, "you cannot escape us this time. Cease this selfish resistance and submit to the authority of the League."

Berry Punch squealed and grabbed Gilda's chest feathers. "Help me!" she pleaded.

Gilda looked from Berry to the scary stallion and back. "Aw, nuts." She grabbed the mare and launched herself into the air with a powerful flap of her wings. "Hold on tight!" Berry Punch just yelped and wrapped her forehooves around Gilda's barrel in response.

Looking back over her shoulder, Gilda yelped and banked aside just in time to avoid a crackling red bolt of magic. "Whoa! What the heck?!" The unicorn's horn flared as he charged another shot. Gilda banked sharply and flew down the closest alleyway before he could fire, zipping between buildings as fast as she could without crashing in a bid to escape the lunatic chasing them.

When she finally shot out into a clearing on the other side of Ponyville she risked a glance over her shoulder. The stallion was nowhere to be seen. Satisfied that they had lost him, at least for the moment, Gilda dumped Berry unceremoniously on the floor, eliciting a startled yelp. "Alright, what the heck is going on?" Gilda asked roughly.

Berry rubbed her head and looked up at her. "It's probably best not to talk about it out in the open. Would you mind escorting me to Sugarcube Corner? I'll explain everything there."

Gilda considered telling the random pony where to get off, but she couldn't help feeling intensely curious about what exactly was going on. That, and the mention of treasures had admittedly caught her attention.

A five minute walk later, keeping their eyes peeled for the angry unicorn, the two found themselves seated at a booth in Sugarcube Corner, each nursing a milkshake. 

"What do we do if that unicorn comes in here?" Gilda asked.

Berry shook her head. "He won't. The League of Cerberus doesn't dare interrupt this place's business."

Gilda frowned in confusion. "The what of what?"

"The League of Cerberus." Berry sighed and took a sip of her milkshake. "They're an organisation formed by the nobility whose sole purpose is the acquisition and protection of rare, unique, or otherwise unusual foods and beverages." In response to the griffon's blank look, she rolled her eyes and tried a simpler explanation. "They're a bunch of posh morons who collect rare food and drinks."

"Ooohh, right, I get it." Gilda raised an eyebrow curiously. "So, what? Did you steal some sort of legendary bread or something?"

Berry snorted. "Far from it. I'm a brewer, one of the few permitted to operate in Equestria. I started off by making wines, that's how I got my cutie mark, but I also dabble in other kinds of alcohol. My newest creation is this," she reached into her saddlebags and pulled out a large bottle full of amber liquid. 

Gilda eyed it in amazement. "Is that…"

"Single malt whiskey," Berry confirmed. "It took me forever to learn how to make it, and then even longer to distil it properly." She sighed and stuffed the bottle back in her saddlebags. "I've got two bottles, and the League of Cerberus wants both."

"Whoa… wait, so the League are trying to steal them? " Gilda asked in surprise, wondering why the mare hadn't just gone to the local heroes for help.

"No, they're not trying to steal anything," Berry assured her. "Well, not exactly, anyway. They're offering a very reasonable amount of bits for the bottles, the problem is they just won't accept no for an answer. They'll buy my whiskey if they have to rip it out of my hooves and stuff the money in my bags by force."

Gilda gave her a confused look. "So… they're trying to force you to sell the whiskey? If they're offering so much, why not just sell some to them?"

Berry smiled ruefully. "I do every now and then, when I come up with something new, but I've already promised the first two bottles of this batch to somecreature else. I don't mind selling the next batch to the League, but they're adamant that they want the very first bottles of the very first batch."

"Which you've already promised to somepony else," Gilda confirmed.

"Yeah. I've got to get the first one to an acquaintance in Canterlot, and the second one is going to a colleague from Saddle Arabia. The problem I have is how to get to them without getting caught by the League." Berry sighed and dropped her head to the table with a thud.

A somber silence fell over the booth. Gilda rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly, thinking hard about what to do. Not long ago, she would have cheerfully left Berry alone without a second thought, unless plenty of bits were offered. Recently, however, she had found herself motivated more and more by the most annoying thing she had ever felt; a conscience.

Finally, Gilda sighed heavily. "Okay, I'll help you deliver your whiskey."

Berry's head snapped up at that. "Really?!"

A small voice in the back of Gilda's head screamed at her to refuse, but she ignored it and forced herself to nod. "Sure, but I want a taste of that whiskey when you've got another batch ready!"

Berry grinned and nodded happily. "Deal!"