This was bad. Really bad! Like, even Nightmare Moon’s return and Queen Chrysalis’ invasion had nothing on this. Well, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration. Or was it? Rainbow Dash couldn’t tell. She’d never actually been eaten before. And not only that, her mare-friend was Celestia knows where! The last she’d seen of Applejack was on the boat, just as those large fangs dropped down on them. And then everything had gone dark. And not just a midnight dark Dash’s eyes could adjust to and actually see shadows. No, this darkness was so dark, that Rainbow Dash could press her hoof up to her nose and still couldn’t see it! Pitch black. That was the term.
Rainbow Dash drifted on through the mouth. She lifted off the ground when she realized she’d been walking on the thing’s tongue. In a word, it was gross. It felt like walking on a leaky, sticky water bed. Moist and slimy from the fish’s saliva, the texture under her hooves had been too much handle. Of course, Dash still had to fly rather low and close to the walls. Because she didn’t know where the throat was, and had absolutely no intention of finding out. The walls though weren't much better. If her wings weren't brushing up against the thing’s teeth, they were scraping gunk off the cheeks of the giant fish.
A sudden tremor rippled through the fish when Rainbow Dash’s wing brushed up against something wet and soft. Dash felt a rush of water and saw some specks of light filtering in between the fish’s teeth. She could leave! Except, she couldn't. She didn't know where Applejack was.
The fish heaved, and suddenly with a gust of air, Rainbow Dash was thrown against the fish’s upper jawline. Saliva and slime splattered everywhere, and then the mouth closed again. But as the mouth closed, Rainbow Dash saw a familiar shape laying across the creature’s tongue.
“Applejack!” She shouted, and unsticking herself from the wall, ignoring the slow-drip of drool down her back, Rainbow Dash flew straight over to Applejack as the big fish closed its mouth. Dash reached out, extended her hooves, and managed to grab hold of her lover before all light was once again removed from the mouth.
Fortunately, the water that had been let in quickly drained away. The direction of the drainage helped Dash to pinpoint the throat somewhere behind her. Good. She knew where that was, and now she never, ever intended on getting closer to it.
“Applejack.” Rainbow Dash said, brushing her hoof through her lover’s soaking wet mane.
“Applejack. Wake up.” Leaning in, Dash placed an ear to the mare’s chest. She held her breath as she listened.
Bump bump. Bump bump.
Oh thank Celestia, she’s alive! And Dash moved her ear up to Applejack’s lips, then let out a sigh of relief. The mare was breathing. “Applejack. Come on, wake up. Applejack.” Rainbow Dash tried again, this time giving the farmer a gentle shake.
Eventually, she heard, “R-Rainbow? What happened? Why can’t I see?”
“Well um . . . That’s because we were kinda eaten.” Dash explained. She would’ve preferred to break the news gently, but somehow, she didn’t think that was remotely possible.
“We were WHAT?! Now how in tarnation did that happen?!” Then Dash felt Applejack shuffling around.
“What are you . . .”
“I’m a trying to stand up. Get my bearings.” Applejack stated. But after only a couple of seconds, Dash heard a “Ahhhhh!” followed by a soft thud.
Feeling around in the darkness, Rainbow Dash carefully felt over Applejack’s body. “What is it? What’s wrong?!”
“Think I twisted my leg. I can’t stand up Dash.” Applejack’s breathing grew a bit ragged after her stumble. It sounded like she was in a bit of pain, like she landed wrong.
“What should I do?” Rainbow Dash asked. She suddenly felt so helpless. Her lover was right there in front of her, in need of help, and she couldn’t' even do anything about it. Heck, she couldn't even see!
“You can start by taking yer hooves off my flank.” Applejack scolded. “We’re not in my room.”
Rainbow Dash felt her cheeks heat up, and swore she could suddenly make out AJ’s narrowed eyes. “Sorry!” She yelped and pulled her hooves back.
Rainbow Dash tried to stammer out an explanation when the sound of giggling caught her off-guard. “A-Applejack?”
The mare’s giggling continued, and it just made Dash’s cheeks redder. How was she supposed to know what she was touching? It’s not like she meant to. If she would’ve known, well she would’ve been gentler and . . . No. Enough of that. This was neither the time nor the place to be thinking about that. Applejack is one sexy mare, but there were bigger problems. Applejack was hurt, and they were trapped inside a fish.
“Sorry Rainbow. I don’t know why I found that so amusing. Guess I just couldn’t' stop seeing that face of yers and how red it must be.”
“W-Well it’s not. Now could you please focus! Or do you like the idea of being turned into seafood?” Dash retorted. “A-And are you really hurt?”
Applejack sighed. She sifted up next to Rainbow, leaning on the pegasus. Dash heard a soft mumble of the farmer trying to conceal her discomfort. “I’m sorry. I’m not that hurt, just can’t rightly stand is all.” Applejack said more earnestly this time. “Guess I still don’t believe this is happening. I mean, the river isn’t this big. How’d a fish the size of my barn get in the river without flooding Ponyville?! Almost like it’s some kinda prank or something.”
Rainbow Dash winced her eyes shut when Applejack leaned up against her. She loved being next to her lover, don’t get her wrong. But the feeling of wet, drooled on fur rubbing up against wet, drooled on fur was simply too gross. But she wouldn’t pull away, not when Applejack needed her.
It was when Applejack mentioned the word “prank” that the gears in Rainbow Dash’s head suddenly jerked into motion. “Oh. That.” She said, suddenly remembering the pony of interest in this whole ordeal, her.
Applejack, never one to miss a beat, said, “Oh, what?”
Well, this was going to be awkward. Maybe torn to shreds between the monster fish’s jaws wouldn’t be so bad. Sighing, Rainbow Dash said, “I think I know why this fish is here. And it might be my fault . . . is my fault, partially.”
She felt Applejack’s body shift against her. And though blind, she knew her partner was staring at her. “And just how is this yer fault?”
“Because . . . I kinda asked Pinkie Pie to do this.” Applejack’s body went rigid. “B-But I didn't ask for this!”
“Rainbow Dash!” Applejack’s voice shot out. This was her, “I demand an explanation” tone. She didn’t need to speak another word.
“I-I may have asked Pinkie Pie to help me catch a bigger fish than yours to win our little date bet.” Rainbow Dash slowly explained. “But I never asked for this! I don’t even know how she pulled this off!”
Dash heard a shuffle of hooves. “Well that’s just great! I’m a going to be eaten all because ya couldn’t play fair! Why in the hay would ya wanna cheat at fishing, of all things, in the first place?!”
“Because!” Dash said. “Every time we do one of these date bets, I always lose . . .”
“Then how about picking something you could actually win?!” Applejack shot back. “Not my fault you picked apple bucking. Not my fault you picked fishing! Not my fault you picked stacking hay, or herding cattle!”
Rainbow Dash gulped. She suddenly wished this stupid darkness would just end. She couldn’t stand not being able to see Applejack’s face. She couldn’t stand having to do this with her eyes closed. “I know!” She finally said, her voice faltering as surely Applejack had heard the stammer. “I know. But ever since we started dating, I’ve felt anything but cool. Everywhere we go, it’s always you that’s holding open the door, always you that’s leading the way. I don't ever get to do anything special for you.” Rainbow Dash rambled, knowing that if she stopped, she wouldn’t be able to continue. And the silence from Applejack was deafening. Oh Celestia why didn't fish hang lights in their mouths! “I wanted to win because I wanted the chance to take you out for an evening, show how special you are to me. I wanted to prove that I could be there for you.”
“Rainbow.” Was Applejack’s first word. “I-I had no idea. I know I teased you and all that . . . But I never meant . . .”
Rainbow Dash shook her head. And she felt stupid because she knew her mare-friend couldn't see it. “I love you Applejack. I love you so very, very much. I just don’t know what to do with it all.”
“Oh Rainbow Dash.” Applejack said, and then the pegasus almost fell backwards as her mare-friend hugged her. She had to reach a hoof back to prop herself up, to keep from both of them toppling over. “You were always there for me dumpling.” Applejack whispered into her ear. “Even though you were slow at apple bucking, terrible at stacking hay, and . . . well we’re just lucky there were no broken bones during cattle herding . . .”
Rainbow Dash sniffled.
“But ya were there for me, when I needed you.” Applejack finished. “Right by my side, having my back. And Dash, that meant a lot to me. Every single time. Didn’t matter to me what you did or didn't get done. I knew ya was trying. You don't need ta prove nothing to me. I’ve been seeing it every single day. It’s why I always want ta treat ya so special-like whenever we go out.”
Rainbow Dash stayed silent. She didn’t know what to say. And even if she did, she was afraid the tears threatening to flood out would ruin any sentence she’d string together.
“Rainbow?”
Dash looked in AJ’s direction. “Yes?”
“Can I tell you a secret?”
“What?”
“I barely won the apple bucking contest.” Applejack whispered.
Rainbow Dash blinked. “W-What?” Her brain far too overloaded to properly process what the mare had just said.
“I stopped bucking down apples long before the day was finished. Actually, bucked just over half of one field. Had Big Mac do the rest for the day.”
“Then what were you . . .”
“Watching you.” Applejack said matter-of-factly. “I couldn't help myself. Cause I was so proud to have you there for me.”
“Wait. Just how close was I to winning then?” Rainbow Dash asked. Her brain finally registering just what had been said to her.
Silence followed, but just for a few seconds. “Let me see.” And Rainbow Dash could just picture Applejack mentally counting things out. “If ya wouldda finished yer row, and then the next . . . another two or three trees and ya’d had me beat.”
“So, you were lying when you said you said everything was finished?”
“Yup. Hehe Big Mac wasn’t too happy neither . . .”
Before Rainbow Dash could even come up with a response, a bright light shown in from above. It created a small spotlight on both Rainbow Dash and Applejack. Having sat in the dark for so long, the light was actually blinding in its own right, and Dash had to cover her eyes from the stinging brightness. “What the . . .” she started to ask, but stopped when her vision finally adjusted. She looked up into the light and saw what appeared to be some kind of blowhole.
“You know . . .” Applejack started. “This place is a lot grosser with the lights turned on. I didn’t really need ta see this.”
Rainbow Dash looked around. Her mare-friend was right. The soft inner walls of the fish’s mouth, pink, rubbery like tissue lining up and over the domed ceiling. Yellowish teeth on one end and a black hole on the other. The smell hadn't gotten any better with the light, but in fact had gotten worse now that Dash could actually see what was causing it. Chunks of rotting who knows what and seaweed lodged between teeth that the tongue occasionally flicked at. With the size of the tongue, they felt little more than a shift underneath them. And then there was the saliva. Now Dash could see AJ was coated in the stuff. Gross. But Rainbow Dash was soaked just as bad.
“Wait. If we’re seeing light,” Rainbow Dash said, “that must mean we surfaced. We can get out of here!”
“And just how in the hay we supposed to do that?” Applejack asked. And Dash could see the farmer favoring her back leg. Must’ve been the one that was twisted.
“Well,” Dash said, glancing about. And after flapping her wings dry (as dry as she could get them), Rainbow Dash flew herself up to the blowhole, and let out a disappointed sigh. A hoof might fit through there, but anything more and they’d get stuck. “Not this way.” She said.
“There better be a way,” Applejack said, looking around. “Cause I know one way I ain’t going.”
Yeah, Dash didn't need to hear anything more on that. She knew which way she wasn’t going, and had a dang good feeling it was the same one Applejack was talking about.
“We gotta get this danged critter to open its mouth. Make it sneeze or cough or something.”
Drifting back down to her partner, Rainbow Dash thought about what her mare-friend had said. “Yeah . . . If only.” And then she stopped. Something like that had happened. Yeah, water poured in from the mouth, and there had been a hint of light. “That’s it!”
“What is?”
“Making it sneeze! Or cough or whatever! We’ll do that!”
Applejack cocked her head towards Dash. “And just how the hay we gonna do that that? Remember Dash, I can’t exactly walk like this.”
“You won’t need to.” Rainbow Dash said. And lifting back off the tongue, she scooped up Applejack in her arms, carrying the farmer like a princess. “I’ll carry you.” She said with a smile.
Applejack, much to the pegasus’ surprise, averted her gaze, and turned a bit . . . red? Yes, she was definitely blushing. Oh Celestia was it cute! Rainbow Dash rarely had the pleasure of seeing her mare-friend all embarrassed like this. She could just squeal!
“Y-You better not drop me.” Applejack squeaked back when she’d noticed Rainbow Dash staring.
“Drop you? Never! What kind of mare-friend would I be?” Rainbow Dash said.
“Then could we hurry it up please?”
“Right away!” Rainbow Dash said, and she didn’t bother to hold back the ear to ear grin that had covered her face. Okay. Assuming things worked out, swallowed by a fish . . . not the worst thing in the world.
“Some-pony’s gonna have ta knock Pinkie up alongside the head for this.” Applejack grumbled.
Rainbow Dash resisted the urge to laugh and carried her mare on over to the side of the fish’s mouth. Then putting herself in reverse, she angled back and flapped her wings a little harder, brushing the tips of her feathers along the walls of the mouth.
It didn’t take long and the whole mouth started shaking. Yes, it was working! Rainbow Dash brushed her wings a little harder against the soft pink tissue. And the mouth opened a bit. Dash kept going, watching as the mouth would open, adjusting her position when the fish tilted itself to dispose of the irritation.
“Rainbow Dash! Look out!”
Dash glanced over just in time to dive out of the way of the giant tongue that swatted at them. She dove under and around, darting to the other side of the mouth and sliding her wings across the tissue. The fish shook more violently, and Dash had to hold Applejack tight to stop from dropping her.
“Just a little a more.” Rainbow Dash said, when she saw the mouth opening up. She needed another good hit to get those jaws safely out of the way for their exit.
Easily dodging the tongue a second time, Rainbow Dash returned to the other side of the fish’s mouth and wiggled her wings over the sensitive tissue of the fish’s mouth. “Hold on!” Dash announced, watching those teeth bobbing open just far enough.
Applejack wrapped her hooves around Dash’s neck. Oh, that was bliss!
“Now!” Rainbow Dash cried out, and bolted for the mouth. She narrowly dodged another collision with the giant tongue. And as fresh air and sunlight came into view, the jaws started to close.
“Oh no you don’t!” Dash kicked herself off into sonic speeds. It was a straight shot from here. Pressing Applejack firmly against her, Rainbow Dash tore through the remaining gap and shot out of the fish’s mouth just as the teeth closed behind them.
“We’re free!” Dash cried out, followed quickly by a “Woah!” as she pulled up only a split second before they both would’ve bounced over the surface of the river.
Arching them high over the river, Rainbow Dash for the first time, saw just how massive that fish was. Half its body protruded out from the water, like a giant soap bubble. Thick green and blue scales accompanied head-sized eyeballs. From below, she could see a group of ponies all gathered around the monstrous fish. Many heads craned up, staring at her.
Any other time, Rainbow Dash would’ve been more than happy to glide down in a victorious descent to her waiting fans. To indulge in the praises and cries of her name. Music to her ears! But the hesitation came in the form of a beautiful mare tucked in her hooves. Applejack, who’d curled up against Dash’s body, looked like a scared little kitten.
“W-What?” Applejack asked. “I-I’m fine. I’m wasn’t scared at all. Nope.”
Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Yeah, I know. That’s why I took my time leaving the fish's mouth, so you could enjoy the view.”
“You mean you could’ve gone faster?! Why I swear my tail was gonna . . .”
Rainbow Dash cracked. She started laughing and heard Applejack grumble, followed by a, “Shut-up.”
“Sorry Applejack.” Rainbow Dash said, and nuzzled her cheek against her mare-friend’s. “That was just too hard to resist.” Then looking down at the grouping of ponies that were staring, Rainbow Dash said, “Shall we head on down? Looks like they’re waiting for us.”
Applejack sighed. “I suppose we should. Just . . . no hurry. It’s actually kinda nice up here.”
Rainbow Dash smiled. She couldn’t have agreed more. And so the pegasus slowed her descent, enjoying this little moment with her lover. All nuzzled up, they slowly descended to the river bank.