Hi there, everypony, and welcome to another episode of Twilight Tries!
So you’ve probably noticed that I’m not exactly at home right now. I’m here at the Hayburger in Ponyville to try something that…I….
*SIGH*
I’m sorry, I’m just a bit nervous about what it is I’m planning on trying today. I’ve never tried anything like it before and I’m just feeling a bit unsure about the whole thing I guess.
Oh, I should probably tell you what it is I’m trying today, shouldn’t I? It’s…speed dating.
Now I’m sure you’re probably asking yourself two questions; Why are you trying speed dating, Twilight, and why are you recording it for your vlog? I’ll answer the aforementioned one first.
You see, I’ve... never been on a date before.
Yeah, I know, I’m in my 20’s and I’ve never been on a date before; what the hell’s wrong with me?
Well, the fact of the matter is, I’m a bit shy when it comes to asking somepony out on a date. I can make friends easily, but for some reason whenever I even think about asking somepony out on a date I get as meek and timid as my friend, Fluttershy. The best reason I can figure for this is that I’m afraid of rejection. Somepony turning down my friendship is one thing, but somepony turning my heart down, that’s another.
This is all especially hard for me because I do want to date, I want to find a special somepony to share my life with someday, but I…just can’t seem to get over that initial hurtle.
But that’s why I’m speed dating today, because speed dating isn’t about meeting that special somepony right off the bat, it’s about meeting new ponies. In other words, it’s not as intimidating as traditional dating.
Now as for why I’m recording this for an episode of Twilight Tries, well…
Okay, I’m just going to admit it; I needed something for a new episode and this was the most convenient thing. I was already registered for this thing and figured I’d kill two birds with one stone. Starlight thinks I’m just being lazy with this one, but seeing as how she doesn’t understand how difficult it is doing a vlog like this I don’t really care what she thinks about it.
I’m rambling.
Anywhoo, while the organizers finish getting everything ready, why don’t I explain how speed dating works for all of you who might not familiar with it.
Speed dating is fairly simple, it involves a group of single ponies going on quickfire dates with each other. As you can see behind me, there are a number of tables throughout the restaurant with only two seats at each one. The mares will stay seated at the same table the entire time and the stallions will move from table to table about every three minutes. If two ponies seem to hit it off and want a second date, they’ll exchange contact information.
See, simple, and not too intimidating.
Oh, it looks like this thing is about to get underway. I better go find a seat.
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Welp, I’m at my table and I’m ready to go!
And here comes my first date now.
Hi, I’m Twilight Sparkle.
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It’s a pleasure to meet you as well, Silver Tail. I see you have a quill and ink pot cutie mark, are you a writer by chance?
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You’re a freelance writer? I see.
What types of things have you written?
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Oh, flat Equestria theory articles. How…interesting.
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And articles about how Celestia planned the changeling invasion of Canterlot. That’s…interesting as well.
Ahehe.
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Um, no, I can’t say I’ve ever heard about how our world in actual just a TV show created to sell toys before.
Oh sweet Celestia.
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*DING*
The bell!
I mean, oh, the bell. I guess our time is up.
Well, it was nice meeting you, Silver Tail. Good luck with your, um, theories.
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Okay, bit of a rocky start. I’m sure the rest of the stallions here will be less…barmy.
Hi there, I’m Twilight Spark-
Oh my, that’s…quite a hoofshake you’ve got there.
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‘Welcome to the gun show’? I’m not sure I follow.
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Oh, you were referring to your muscles.
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Um, you really don’t need to flex like that. I can tell they’re impressive without it.
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Yes, I can imagine you workout quite a bit to get them that big.
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Are seeing this? He’s kissing his muscles.
Who does that?
Hi there, I’m Twilight Sparkle.
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Oh, you…want to show me a picture of your ex-marefriend.
Okie dokie then.
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Oh, yes, she’s very beautiful.
Very beautiful indeed.
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She was a really gifted singer too?
You don’t say.
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You did everything together, huh?
That sounds, um, nice.
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She broke up with you because she thought you were being too obsessive and clingy.
That seems...difficult to believe.
Hello, I’m Twilight…
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Oh, you’re a big fan of mine? Well, thank you.
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Uh, no, I didn’t know there was a ‘Princess Twilight Fan Club’ and that you’re the president of it.
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I mean, I’m honored and all, but I don’t really think I deserve a fan club.
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Um, I’m glad you think so highly of me, but could you please stop leaning across the table so much? You’re kind of invading my personal space.
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Oh, no, no, it’s fine, really.
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No, really, it’s fine, there’s no need to start crying. I was just…caught off-guard is all.
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Oh dear.
Look, I swear I don’t hate you or anything. I think you’re really, um, friendly. Honest.
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You want to talk wedding cakes?
Greaaaat.
Where is that dang bell already?
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This guy’s been talking nonstop since he sat down. I can’t get a single word in edgewise.
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Hi, I’m…Sunburst?!
Oh my gosh, it’s so good to see you!
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So what are you doing here? I never figured you for the speed dating type.
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Um, I’m sorry ma’am, who are you?
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You’re Sunburst's mom?
Oh, wow, it is so nice to meet you…here…at speed dating…with your son.
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Oh, yes, I’m sure you only want what’s best for Sunburst.
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Well you certainly seem like a...devoted parent.
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Yes, I’m well aware of how accomplished your son is.
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And how handsome he is too, yes.
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Umhmm, any mare would be lucky to have him indeed.
She's winking at me now.
Somepony please end this.
Oh thank Celestia it’s over!
Seriously, I don’t know how much more of that I could take. None of those of dates were pleasant, at all. I mean, I thought when I saw Sunburst that I’d have at least one good date, but then his mom made it the worst one of all.
*SIGH*
So yeah, speed dating. I tried it, and I’m never doing it again. In fact, I think I’m done with any kind of dating for a while. I’m sure I’ll find a special somepony someday, but for now I’m just going to enjoy being single and appreciate the fact that things aren’t near as bad as they could be for me romantically.
As always, thanks for watching, everypony!
Until next time!