"Well, maybe if you hadn’t disintegrated the map, we could have been there a long time ago!" Cozy Glow whined as she flew through the low-hanging vines of the forest. "Ugh, get off my back!" Chrysalis barked back. Literally. She had turned into a diamond dog in her rage at getting lost and was currently struggling to escape a deep puddle of mud. "That map had it coming! I didn’t like the way it looked at me with its evil eye." Tirek yawned as he leaned against a tree, nearly breaking it off its stump. "That was the compass they put in the corner, Chrysalis. Honestly, how can you not know your way around a forest after you spent so long cowering from Starlight Glimmer in one?"
Grogar, meanwhile, was trying to get the three cranky baddies to shut up so he could try and deduce where they were. Because he didn’t know where Magic Land was, he was unable to tell where the heck he was supposed to teleport them. "This is ridiculous! Maybe we should have taken a left at the Ursa Major cave. Why didn’t those ponies in the ad just give directions?" His thoughts were interrupted by a loud growl coming from Cozy Glow's stomach as the tiny pegasus rubbed her tummy. "Grogar, I’m hungry. Can we stop for some lunch?"
Grogar rolled his eyes as he faced the pony. "'Can we stop for LUNCH'? This isn’t a road trip. We are on a quest! Don’t you want to get revenge on that awful princess? Once we have absorbed all the magic from that silly little amusement park, those ridiculous ponies won’t know what hit them!"
Tirek waved his hands in the air to get rid of some annoying fly-ders. "I won’t know what will hit me if we don’t get out of this forest! I’m growing delirious by the minute, and these bugs won’t leave me alone!" He swatted at a fly-der that proceeded to sting him. "Gah! I'M WARNING YOU!" Suddenly, he got an idea. He grabbed Cozy Glow from the air and pulled her closer to him. ”Cozy, why don’t you make yourself useful and fly ahead to find the park? Then we’ll sneak off, steal their magic, and ditch this old goat!"
"No, Tirek. I’m not listening to another one of your ridiculous ideas! All they do is get us in trouble!" Suddenly, Cozy cringed and shielded her eyes with a hoof as a bright light blinded her. "Jeez, calm down. You don’t have to fire up your magic on me."
"Huh?" Tirek turned around and grunted as he saw a bright yellow flashing object in the distance. "Who in the name of Star Swirl has the right to put up a gigantic flashy castle like that in the middle of the forest? I’m walking here!" He yelled. "Ooh, a castle! Did we get a new princess? Let’s raid it!" Suddenly, Chrysalis pushed past the two. "That isn’t a castle, you dolts! It’s a sign!" The two stared blankly at her. "What, like a metaphorical sign, or..." Tirek wondered. "NO!" She pointed at the letters on the sign, which clearly red MAGIC LAND in big blue letters. "It’s a sign for the park, you cen-tard! We found it!"
"What do you mean 'we'?" Grogar growled as he pushed them wide with his magic. "Why, I knew it was there the whole time- I don’t recall it being that flashy in the ad though. " Cozy shrugged. "Meh. The ad's usually change a lot of the stuff. Now come on!"
The four villains pushed their way though the forest and carefully approached the big yellow archway at the front of park. Luckily, there weren’t any ponies there who might recognize them, except for one colt who approached Grogar while the others were distracted and mistook him for a big blue bunny rabbit. After blasting a hole in the ground in front of him and scaring him off, Grogar joined the others at the entrance.
Chrysalis sniffed the air and patted her belly. "Mmmm! I can smell all the delicious essence of this place from here!" Tirek flexed his muscles. "I feel sorry the sap running this joint! He’s about to get all the magic zapped out of him! I hope he’s a unicorn! They’re the tastiest! Although some flight magic might be nice too." Cozy Glow perched in between his horns and squinted inside the park. "Yeesh, what’s the point? I’ve never seen you FLY! But you’re right! Who IS in charge here?"
Suddenly, a piano began playing in the background. The group looked around in confusion as two twin unicorns with shiny red hair and striped shirts leaned out from the entrance. "Salutations, weary travellers! And welcome to Flim and Flam's... MAGIC LAND!" They said the last part together, and the one with the moustache added, "We decided the name sounded better with the space in between."
And with that, the two vaudeville ponies jumped into an upbeat song about whatever the hell they were trying to sell this time, but the four evil creatures were distracted by the sounds of the rides moving from inside the park. "Well, this place sounds MARVELLOUS! I’m going straight for the Ferris wheel!" Queen Chrysalis flew towards the entrance, but Cozy pushed her back. "Not so fast. Professor Applejack told us about these guys. They’re total con artists. They’ve done everything on this scumbag checklist." She pulled a long list out from her hair, which Grogar immediately disintegrated with his magic before speaking. "I don’t care what they’ve done. They should still know not to mess with the first emperor of Equestria!"
"SILENCE, you charlatans!" Grogar yelled, slamming his hoof on the ground to stop the unicorn's singing. "As the REAL ruler of this nation I DEMAND you let me and my... ugh... acquaintances into your park." His eyes glowed in an effort to scare the two, but they weren’t very intimidated. "Nyah, sorry, goat, but we charge the price of admission for every guest, no exceptions!" Flim said.
"Oh, for Pete's sake! It said in the ad that admission is free!" Grogar pointed out. "Pfft, come on. Everyone knows the ads change a lot of the stuff." Flam said with a chuckle and extended a hoof. Grogar snorted angrily and turned to the others. "Alright, Do any of you have any bits?" He asked. "Uh, we don’t even have pockets." Tirek said. Grogar facepalmed. "Oh, fuck this. We're villains! We don’t have to be held back by a TICKET BOOTH!" He attempted to blast Flim and Flam to bits but they deflected it. The old ram sighed and spawned a bag of treasures in his right hoof. "Do you take ruby's or are diamonds enough?"
While Grogar struggled to figure out the payment option, his minions moved inside the park and gazed in awe at the wonderful sights and sounds: merry-go-rounds, game booths, food stands, and tents with other surprises in them. "Still think those two are 'scumbags'?" Tirek asked sarcastically. "Not anymore! This place looks soooo cool! And I’m starving, so if you’ll excuse me..." She flew towards a hot dog stand but was, once again, pulled back by Chrysalis. "Hold on, you little brat! We aren’t here to EAT! We’re here to drain it of all its magic, remember?" She looked to Tirek for support, but the red centaur just shrugged. "I don’t know. I DO kind of want to try that strength hammer game, though..."
With that, they ran off like little kids, wanting to try everything in the park before they destroyed it. Chrysalis groaned and looked back at Flim and Flam, who were chuckling and sharing a hoof bump as they watched Grogar trying to use a Castar card. She glared evilly at the park she was beholding, with the sun creating a tall shadow of her like a real queen overlooking her kingdom. "Fine... they want us to have fun... let’s have some fun..."